Selected quad for the lemma: friend_n

Word A	Word B	Word C	Word D	Occurrence	Frequency Band	MI	MI Band	Prominent
friend_n	cook_n	sir_n	wrong_a	30	3	16.4547	5	false

Text snippets containing the quad

ID	Title	Author	Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication)	STC	Words	Pages
A32424	Cambridge jests, or, Witty alarums for melancholy spirits by a lover of ha, ha, he.	Lover of ha, ha, he.	1674 (1674)	Wing C332; ESTC R7388	59,605	164

haste to buy a Pig but not liking those that were dead would have a live one Sir said she I have one of the same bigness alive the price is so much Well here is your money said he but how shall I carry it Why for a groat you shall have Poke and all Poke what is d'at said the Frenchman 'T is a Bag Sir said she that it is tied up in Oh de Bag is dat de Poke well here is a groat Thus away he goes with his Bargain home but when he comes to look in the Poke O de Diable says he is dis de Pig de Dible take me if I do buy de Pig in de Poke agin 16. A Taylor that was ever accustomed to steal some of the Cloth his Customer brought when he came one day to make himself a Suit stole half a yard his Wife perceiving it asked the reason Oh said he 't is to keep my hands in use least at any time I should forget it 17. A Scholar that fancy'd himself to sing well notwithstanding he had a very hoarse voice having often observed that a poor woman was used to cry when she heard him sing asked her at last the reason Truly Sir said she when through poverty I had sold all my goods and had nothing left but a poor Ass at last I lost my Ass and I never hear you sing but you put me in mind of it 18. A Cook leaving his Master who was very miserable and sparing in his Diet when his Master asked him the reason Truly Sir said he I am afraid that if I stay here long I should forget my Trade 19. One seeing a bare-legg'd Fellow run on an errand said Do you hear friend when those Stockings are worn out I will give you a new pair I thank you Sir replied the other these Stockings have lasted me a great while I have also a pair of Breeches of the same Stuffe that never had but one hole in them and that 's at your service too 20. A Gentleman passing by a poor man asked alms of him whereupon the Gentleman asked him what he lived upon Sir said he I can make no answer to that but had you asked me what I die of I should have told you of hunger 21. A drunken Hector being brought before a Justice of Peace upon the account of Swearing was commanded to deposite his Fine which was two shillings thereupon plucking out a Half-Crown said Pray what should I have paid had I cursed the Justice told him Six pence Then quoth he a pox take you all for a company of Knaves and Fools and there 's Half a Crown for you I will never stand changing of Money 22. A Gentleman meeting the Kings Jester asked What news Why Sir reply'd he There are forty thousand men risen to day I pray to what end said the other and what do they intend Why to go to bed again at night said he 23. A Gentleman playing a Game at Tables in a Chamber in Fleet-street four stories high had so ordered his Game that no chance of the Dice could lose it but one yet it so happen'd that that chance came whereupon he grew so passionate that bringing down the Tables into the Street he made a stop and asking the next Gentleman that came if he understood the Game the Gentleman said he did Then pray Sir said he what do you think could lose me the Game then pausing a little I think there 's nothing but such a chance Why then said the passionate Gamester God dam me if I have not thrown it 23. One asked Why men sooner gave to poor people that begged than to Scholars 'T is said one because they think they may sooner come to be poor than to be Scholars 24. A Courtier having begg'd a rich Landed Fool of the King made him wait upon him so the Fool coming one day with his Master to a Gentlemans House where the Picture of a Fool was wrought in a rich Suit of Arras Hangings cut out the Fool with his knife and being accused for it You have more reason said he to commend and give me thanks for it for had my Master seen the Picture of a Fool in your Hangings he would have begg'd them of the King 25. A Countreyman coming to Paris with his Ass loaded the Beast stuck in a d●rty place of the Road wherefore the Peasant struck him with a stick to make him rise till at last a Courtier passing by said How now Villain art thou not ashamed to abuse thy Beast so If thou strikest him again I will give thee a hundred blows with the same Cudgel The poor man ignorant what to do pull'd off his Hat till the Gentleman was past and then began to beat his Beast worse than before saying How now mine Ass who would have thought that thou hadst had friends at Court 26. A French Peasant passing by a Ditch with his Cart full of Onions the Cart overturned and the Onions fell into the Water then seeing there was no remedy Morebleau said he here wants nothing but salt to make good pottage 27. A Stranger being much necessitated as he walked into the City to do that no one could do for him and being in a place far from any of his acquaintances and void of convenience for that purpose went into an Upholsters Shop and asked the Man to shew him a Close-Stool which being done he asked if he had no better Yes Sir we have said he of all coloured Velvet Go then said he and fetch two or three in the mean time he let down his Breeches and sate down the Upholsterer seeing him in that posture asked him What he did I am trying it said he and pulling up his Breeches I will have none of them they are all too low 28. An Apprentice of London being brought before the Chamberlain by his Master for the sin of incontinency even with his own Mistriss the Chamberlain thereupon gave him many Christian Exhortations and at last mentioned and press'd the Chastity of Joseph when his Mistriss tempted him with the like crime of incontinency I Sir said the Apprentice but if Joseph's Mistriss had been as handsome as mine is he could not have forborn 29. It happen'd in Chancery when the Council of the Parties set forth the boundary of the Land in question by the Plot and the Council of one part said We lie on this side my Lrod and the Council of the other part said We lie on this side the Lord Chancellor stood up and said If you lie on both sides whom will you have me believe 30. It happen'd that an old and a young Gentleman courted a young Lady and both one day met at her House together the young one being much troubled at the sight of his Rival said mocking Pray Sir how old are you To which the old man answered 'T were hard for me to tell you exactly my age because I never reckoned it but I am very certain

for that rate Do then replied he and you will have two 100. Two men scolding the wiser went away but the other followed after brawling and condemning him for running away Alas said he though you have power to give bad words I have not to hear them 101. A fine mouthed Scholar seeing a Sparrow mute on his companions hat said to put the matter in fine language Sir A Sparrow has untrussed a point upon your hat 102. A School-master being very angry one day with one of his young Scholars for writing his name upon the wainscote went about to whip him but the Boy begging earnestly the Master said He 's a Fool and ever shall that writes his name upon the Wall Sirrah What say you to that To which the Lad made answer He 's a Fool and ever shall that takes a Wainscote for a Wall 103. One being much intreated to warm his fingers I thank you Sir said he I do not use to stand upon my hands 104. A young Gentleman to save the lash threw himself at his Masters feet but being afterwards blamed by his Friends for so debasing himself 'T is not my fault said he but his if his ears be in his feet 105. A young Scholar drinking Mum with a Gentleman the Gentleman thinking to pose him said Pray how do you decline 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 but he wittily said 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 106. A witty Scholar once asked money o● his Patron Why have you not often told 〈◊〉 says his Patron that Scholars never wa●ed money 'T is true said he but I a● now a little in haste I will talk with you that by and by So his Patron gave hi● money which having received No● says he do Scholars want money 107. One being chid by his Friends 〈◊〉 wearing his nails so long I can ass● you said he I pare them every foot 108. After the sad and dismal Fire in Lond● when nothing was left standing but ruin● one passing by as they were pulling dow● a wall Have a care have a care cr● he to the Labourers or you will pull dow● the foundation upon your head 109. An arch youth supping among his fe●low Scholars at a Boarding-School whe● they were seeing them carve too busi● and cut him clearly out of Common moreover when they had done to jeer hi● and throw the bones at him went privi● behind one of them and lifting up his le● like the creature that feeds upon bone● pissed upon him 110. A Scholar of Cambridge in the time of the Assizes seeing a Boy in the Castleward throwing stones at the Gallows ●ave a care Sirrah said he you do not 〈◊〉 the mark 111. Some Companions talking concerning Minerals and Metals one started the Question at last Why the two noblest Metals Gold and Silver one lookt but pale the other so white Because answered another they have both so many that ly in wait for them 112. Look look said a Scholar to his Companion how the Townsmen laugh at you And other Fools perhaps replied the other laugh at them but neither do they mind fools nor I them 113. A Tobaconist whose wits were now grown dry with smoaking and his brains probably consumed to ashes when some commended this mans Tobacco others that Say what you please Gentlemen quoth he but a clearer Tobacco you never saw for I am sure it hath neither leaves nor stalks 114. The same person probably hear● much swearing in a Bowling green sai● Fie Gentlemen 'T is Gods great men the Bowling Green doth not fall upon yo● heads 115. 'T is farther reported by some th●● the same man sitting at Supper his C● passed too and fro through his Arms offending his mouth with her tail whe●● upon in a rage Don Quixot like he c● off the tip of her tail most valiantly ● think now Mistriss Puss I have given y● an Ear mark The Cat taking it ill fo● the present absents her self all that night but the next morning knowing her M●ster was a man that never let the Sun se● upon his anger she came after her wonted manner to express her kindness to him by standing in his way Why how now you troublesome Bitch says he are you come again I thought I had given you your breakfast last night 116. A young Boy throwing stones one day amongst a crowd of people Have a care says a Gentleman passing by perhaps you may hit your Father 117. A Carpenter being at work in a Bowling Green was asked what he was about I am a making said he a Bench for 〈◊〉 standers by to sit upon 118. The first night King Charles the First came into Ragland Castle his Majesty desired to see the great Tower where his Lordship used to keep his Treasure and spake to Doctor Baily to fetch the Keys He ran down to the Marquiss and acquainted him with the Kings pleasure who would needs bring the Keys himself to the King When the King saw the Marquiss bringing the Keys himself he said My Lord There are some men so unreasonable 〈◊〉 to make me believe that your Lordship hath good store of Gold yet left within this Tower but knowing how I have exhausted you could never have believed it until now I see you will not trust the Keys with any but your self To which the Marquiss answered Sir I was so far from giving your Majesty any such occasion of thought by this tender of my duty that I protest unto you I was once resolved your Majesty should have lain there but that I was loath to commit you to the Tower 119. A Scholar meeting a poor ignorant Peasant on the Road How far friend say● he to Cambridge By my faith Sir say● he I do not know but from Cambridge t● this Town is counted seven miles 120. One having sent for a Physitian to his Daughter that was desperately ill the Doctor being come and having examined the Case how she was seeing her lie on her back advised her to lie rather on her side Ay Sir said her Father I have alwayes told her her bac● was the best side to lie upon and she would never believe me 121. A certain person being asked by hi● friend why he wore his Stockings with the wrong sides outwards Oh said he being forced to wear the one so I turn the ●ther also that it may not be so easily perceived But pray why quoth the other ● you wear one with the wrong side outwards Why because said he it hath a hole ● the other side 122. A Crew of boon Companions in the height of their mirth began to be captions and quarrel so Thomas threw a piece of a Tobacco-pipe in John's face but Thomas denied it and cleared himself Well 't was ill done of you Thomas though quoth John whoever did it 123. Two Scholars had made a match one night to go steal Rabbets in a Warren the one that was set to watch when the Rabbets came cried out Ecce cuniculi multi at which the