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A05326 A helpe to discourse. Or, A miscelany of merriment Consisting of wittie, philosophical and astronomicall questions and answers. As also, of epigrams, epitaphs, riddles, and iests. Together with the countrymans counsellour, next his yearely oracle or prognostication to consult with. Contayning diuers necessary rules and obseruations of much vse and consequence being knowne. By W.B. and E.P. Basse, William, d. ca. 1653, attributed name.; Phillips, Edward, 1630-1696?, attributed name.; Pond, Edward, d. 1629, attributed name. 1619 (1619) STC 1547; ESTC S117185 70,959 300

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beasts besides and yet this point is diuided among mortals into many points and with fire sword contended for and sought many are so besotted therewith that they would exchange for a mote of this point their part of Heauen could they meete with a Chapman Q. Where is the Center or Middlemost part of the earth A. At Delphos as the Auncient would haue it to which purpose Strabo tels a Story of two Eagles sent from Ioue one from the East and another from the West which met at Delphos some are of opinion that it is neere the Mount Taurus Ptolomeus thought it vnder the Equinoctiall Strabo at Pernassus a mountaine in Graecia Plutarch was likewise of that opinion But most of our Ecclesiasticall Writers haue thought Iudea to be the middle of the earth and Hierusalem the very point and Center of which opinion was Saint Hirom Hillarius Lyra and others according to the Psalme God hath wrought saluation in the middest of the earth That is at Hierusalem by his passion Yet in respect of the whole world there is no place properly the middle because it is round Q. What were the names of those two theeues that were crucified with Christ A. The Scripture mentioneth not yet we haue it by tradition and from history that they were Dismas and Gesmas Dismas the happy and Gesmas the vnfortunate according the Poet. Gismas Damnatur et Dismas ad Astraleuatur Q. VVherefore is the world round A. Because that it and all therein should not fill the heart of man being a Triangle receptacle for the holy Trinitie Q. How farre is the East distant from the VVest A. A dayes iourney for the Sunne passeth betweene them euery day Q. VVhether is the water or the earth the greater A. It is answered The water is bigger then the earth the aire bigger then the water and the fire bigger then the aire Q. VVhat comparison is there between the Sun and vertue A. So much that when as the Sun is at the highest the lesser shadow doth it cast vpon the earth as the neerer thereto the greater so vertue the more high eleuate it is the more it shines vnseene vnlesse to it selfe and such as participate in the fruition thereof as that other the more vnreall and declining a greater but a worser light to the World A certain old Doctor of the Church compared the Old Testament and the New to the Sun and the Moone the Old borrowing light from the New as the Moone from the Sun the New being wrapped vp in the Old and the Old reuealed in the New Q. VVhat is the highest of all things A. The Sea is higher then the earth the ayre higher then the Sea the fire higher then the ayre the Poles higher then the fire God higher then the Poles higher then God nothing Q. VVhat may the world most fitly be compared vnto A. To a deceitfull nut which if it be opened with the knife of truth nothing is found within it but vacuity and vanity Q. Si fugio sequitur si me fugit illa sequentem Res mira varia est dic mihi queso quid est A. The Rainbow which seemes to vary in colours according to the variation of the minde of him that beholds it Q. VVhat times are we chiefly to select to our selues for the ordering of our affaires and as the most conuement for that purpose A. The morning and the euening in the morning to prepose what wee haue to doe In the euening to consider what we haue done and effected so that we may husband our time in the early and wise disposall and accomplishment of our affaires and next That we may also haue the first of these golden verses on our side and the other either frustrated or not strongly against vs which ensue as followeth and first for our early rising and the morning Sanctificat ditat sanat quoque surgere mane Englished To rise betimes hath still beene vnderstood A meanes to inrich make wise preserue pure blood For the second Omnia sireputes transactaetempora vitae Velmale veltemere vel nihil egit homo Englished Suruey all times and there swift progresse scan Rash bad or nothing in them 's done by man Q. VVhether throughout the whole yeere are there more cleere or cloudy dayes A. The dry are more then the Rayny cleere more then the cloudy according to the Poet. Si numeres anno soles nubila toto Inuenies nitidum saepius esse diem Number the dayes the cloudy and the cleere And thou shalt find more faire then foule in the yeere Q. VVhether are some dayes to be accounted infortunate or not as in our Callend are set downe A. They are not as in the Countrimans Counsellor here ensuing is further to that purpose related And therefore Heracluus not without cause blames Hesiod for his distinction of dayes good and euill as if he were ignorant that all dayes were alike To which purpose is here annexed the noble courage and resolution of Lucullus the Captaine who with no lesse happy euent then ripe iudgement being indangered by an enemy and vpon an ominous day as his souldiers termed it surprised animated them on not withstanding to a famous rescue and victory with this perswasion that giuing the onset with resolution they should change a black day to a white and the successe was answerable Q. VVhether is the custome lawfull or not that is commonly vsed for the celebration of our birth dayes A. The Heathens in ancient times had this custome in great esteeme and reuerēce in some measure we may be imitators of thē but how we shold celebrate ours S. Austen hath giuen vs a Rule that is with thankefulnesse and reioycing in God that hee would haue vs born to be temples consecrate to him then truly reioycing when we find in our selues a willingnesse and perfection in some measure to goe forward and indeauour the end of our creation which is the seruice of God vnto the which vnlesse we referre our whole care we shall haue small cause of reioycing but rather to wish we had neuer been borne And most of the fathers are of opinion that none of all the Saints thus celebrated their birth dayes but Gentiles as Pharaoh Herod and the like From Heathens we discend a moment to the Pope and Rome Q. The Pope borrowes two prerogatiues from the Apostles and what are they A. Saint Peters keyes and S. Pauls sword that what he cannot enter into by the one he may enforce by the other after the example of Iulius the 2. Pope of Rome who leading his army along by the riuer Tyber threw therein his keyes saying When Peters keyes profit vs nothing then come out Pauls sword and how it is drawne at this time the world takes notice as against Venice France the Duke of Ferrara and in an hurly burly vnsheathed throughout all Italy The dog that with shut eyes barks against all truth Q. Tell me in the vertue
of holy obedience what garments weare they that preserued their wearers from the diuell A. The garments of S. Francis as the Papists tell vs as if the diuell cold not as well know a knaue in a Fryars habit as in any other Q. VVhat is the reason of all other things that the Pope christens his Bels they hauing many times that preheminence before men A. That the sound of them might driue diuels out of the ayre cleare the skies chase away stormes tempests quench fires and giue some comfort to the very dead and the like To which purpose here the Bels ring out their owne peale En ego Campana nunquam denuntio vana Laudo deum verum plebem voco congrego elerum Diffunctos plango viuos voco fulmina frango Vex mea vox vitae voco vos ad sacra venite Sanctos collaudo tonitrus fugo funera claudo Funera plango fulgura frango sabatha pango Exicto Lentos dissipo ventos paco ceuentos Englished Behold my vses are not small That God to praise assemblies call That breke the thūder waile the dead And cleanse the aire of tempests bred With feare keep off the fiends of hell And all by vertue of my knell Q. VVhat numb was the most fatall to Rome A. The sixt number according to the verse ensuing Sextus Tarquinius Sextus Nero Sextus iste scilitet Papa Alexander 6. Semper sub sextis perdita Roma suit What other names or numbers to her woone In the sixt still she lost was Rome vndone Q. VVhat inscription or motto was that according to the fiction which Martin de Asello fixing ouer his Gate by reason of the false povating of the Painter cost him his Bishopricke A. Portapatens esto nulli claudaris honesto Where the Painter mistaking himselfe made the point at nulli and so made it Gate be open to none but shut out all honest men The Pope riding that way before Martin had corrected his inscription taking it profest knauery discarded him of his Bishoprick as it was a wonder and placed another in his house Who kept the inscription still but only altered the point and made it thus Porta patens esto nulli claudaris honesto Adding therevnto Ob vnum punctum caruit Martinus Asello Gate open to the good and shut out none For one poore point is all from Martin gone Q. There is a certaine thing that hath not the art of numeration neither knowes the order of time how it passeth and yet least wee should be ignorant or the time should deceiue vs it instructs vs both honestly A. A Clocke vpon which on thus writeth Qui nescit quo vita modo volat audiat bora Quam sit vitae breuis nos docet ille sonus Hee that would know how minutes steale away That peece vp howres that patch out the day This trusty watchman to supply our need Proclaimes our liues short span in their swift speed Q. What are the natures and dispositions of the foure Elements A. The earth is dry the water cold the ayre moyst and the fire hot Q Which is the highest of these Elements A. The fire whose nature is euer to mount vpward and if you turne it downeward it goes out thereupon Thence proceeds Saint Chrysostomes admiration that the Rayes of the Sun in nature hot in quality glorious doth shoot downeward so contrary to the fire Q What fire is that that sometimes followes and sometimes flyeth away A. An Ignus fatuus or walking fire one wherof keeps his station this time neere Windsor the pace of which is caused principally by the motion of the ayre for the swifter one runs the swifter it followes the motion of the ayre enforcing it Q. VVhat thing is that most vsefull and pretious in the world that produceth another of novse nor goodnesse at all A. Fire from whence proceedes smoake of which Lipsius writes Ita te tolle a humo vt absis a fumo Q. VVhat Coales do longest of all other preserne fire A. The Coales of Iuniper of whom it is reported that they haue kept fire a whole yeere together without supply or going out Q. VVhat is that which being the heauiest hardest of all things yet yeelds both to the extremity of fier and water A. A Stone Q. VVhat stone of all other is the greatest wonder A. The flint stone that preserues fire within it a wonderfull secret and benefit to man Q. VVhat is that which being first water afterwards assumed the form of a stone and still retaines it A. The Chrystall congealed by frost Q. What stone is that that yeelds neither to the fire nor to the hammer A. The Adamant which as our Naturalists obserue is dissolued onely by goates blood wherevpon S. Chrysostome writes though the heart of a Sinner be more harder then the Adamant yet wil the blood of Christ mollifie it Q Whether haue stones a vegitiue life or no. A. This if we doubt our Pioners and Mineralists will resolue vs who finde out by experience that although Mineralles buried deepe in the earth yet through diuers vaines and channels suck in moysture and nourishment as doe plants and trees and that they do likewise increase and grow though in a slower progression and degree then other things is probable and certaine Q. Is there a difference of prerogatiue among stones A. T' is answered there is For the stone in the Altar hath more honour then the stone in the streete For the one is kneeled vnto with deuotion the other troden on by the feet Q. Which are the most precious stones for mans vse A. The two milstones of the mill Of which the one neuer stirres and the other ne're lies still Q. VVhat birds of all other are the most gentle the most innocent A. The Doue for gentlenesse and simplicity is commended in Scripture for the Doue is among birds as the Sheepe is among beasts frō whose kind no hurt proceeds to man being a sotiable creature for his seruice of whom it is obserued that he yeelds vp his life for the sustenance of man sobbing it out with a kind of meeknesse and patience more then any other creature and for his vse there is nothing vnnecessary for our seruice in the whole composure of him his flesh being good for meate his guts for the strings of Instruments his dung to inrich the field his wooll for cloth so nothing superfluous So likewise the Doue a patient not an offensiue creature without beake or tallents of oppression hauing no other offence against their enemy the Hawke such like more then the swiftnesse of her wing according to the Poet Fello columbo caret rostro non ledit possidet innocuas puraque grana ledit Her food is graine her beake doth not offend No gall this creature hath nor no bad ende And therefore they hate the Hawke as it is said because of his beake Odimus Accipitrem quia semper vinit in armis We hate the Hauke and feare
are the three first members formed in the wombe after conception A. The heart the braine and the liuer the three chiefe members of life Q. Which is the last made A. The eye The interpretation of the mind The last member formed in the wombe and the first that loseth his motion in death for in that exigent the spirits of the sight betake themselues to the braine as to their castle of refuge a sure token of death Q. When a man dies which is the last part of him that stirres and which of a woman A. To answere merily and not altogether impertinently t is said the last part of a man that stirs is his heart but of a woman her tongue Q. A wise man said that from the most vildest creatures on the earth iust matter might be had whereby to glorifie God to this one answered what tak'st thou from the Serpent whereby to glorifie him A. To praise him that he made me not such a one To which purpose is here annexed a story of one who seeing a Toade lie in the way fell a weeping two Bishops comming by inquired his reason who answered that the sight of that vgly and loathsome creature had admonished him of his ingratitude to God that had neuer giuen him thankes for the excellency of his creation beeing made after his owne Image when hee being but as clay in the Potters hands it was in his power to haue made him a vessell of dishonor yea euen the basest and deformed such a one as that Toade Q. What is the most beautifull thing in the world A. One answered the Sunne but another replyed that blinde men saw not that and therefore hee concluded that Vertue was much more resplen dent which euen the blind might perceiue perfectly Q. What is the strongest of all things A. One answered Wine another a King a third a Woman and all these are very powerfull but truth is the strongest of all which ouercomes all things Q. Who is the greatest opposer of this Truth A. One answered the Pope who as Baleus recites is so opposite that commonly whatsoeuer he praise● is worthy of disprayse for whatsoeuer hee thinkes is vaine whatsoeuer he speakes is false whatsoeuer he dislikes is good whatsoeuer hee approoues is euill and whatsoeuer he extols infamous Q. What seate is ordained for Popes after this life A. Heauen they continually sell and daily offer to sale and therefore Hell is their place in reuersion according to the Poet Vendidit coelum Romanus Astra sacerdos Ad Stigias igitur cogiturire domos Q. What part of speech is Papa for the Pope A. Part of a particip●e because hee partakes part from the Clergy part from the Laity and part from both without Mo●d or ●e●se Papa nec D●us Nec Angelus Nec Homo● quid tunc the Pope is neither God Angel nor Man what then Diabolus Q. VVho are those that pray for all Defend all Feed all Deuoure all A. In an old picture I found it thus written The Pope with his Clergy saies I pray for you all Caesar with his Electors I defend you all The Clown with his sack of Corne I nourish you all at last comes Death and sayes I deuoure you all Q. VVhat little fish is that in the Sea that hath the greatest strength A. The Rhemora a little fish of halfe a foot long which but by fastening vpon it will stay a Ship vnder sayle with winde and tide Q. What thing is a Lyon most afrayde of A. The crowing of a Cocke and the noyse of a Cartwheele Q. What difference of Daies is there of the Christians the Turks and the Iewes Sabbaoth A. The Christians keepe their Sabbaoth on Sunday The Iewes on the Saturday and the Turkes on the Friday in scorne of Christ that was that day crucified Q. What is death very fitly resembled vnto A. To a woman or a shadow for seeke it and it flies you flie it and it seekes you so a Woman according to the Poet. Follow a shadow it still flies you Seeme to flie it will pursue you So court a woman shee denies you Let her alone she will court you Q. What is that which of running becomes staid of soft becomes hard of weake becomes strong and of that which is infi●it becomes but one It is answered Ice Q. Whether was Christ all euer Ice A. It is answered that those waters which are congealed with a continuall and dayly cold as by the space of ten or twentie yeares are called Christall by reason of their transparencie and are for the most part found vpon the Alpine Mountaines eleuated against the face of the North where they become so hard that sc●rce they euer after yeeld to the hammer Q. What liquor of all other soonest extinguisheth the fire A. Vineger for the exceeding piercing coldnesse and eagernesse it hath Q What is the strongest of all things in the world A. Thal. Mill. answered Fate another Death because it ouercomes all things Q. How many letters are there in the holy tongue A. As many as there are bookes in the old Testament of which one thus further obserues that as 22. letters forme our voyce so 22. bookes containe our faith Q. VVhat comparison is there betweene Prophets and Poets A. Thus much according to the old verse Illi de rebus praedicere vera futuris Hi de perteritis dicere falsa solent Englished Of things to come these truely make vs know What the other of things past doth falsly show Q. VVho were those that were seene to eate after their deaths A. Christ Lazarus the daughter of Iayrus and others Q. Vpon what kind of persons according to Diogenes opinion are not benefits to be bestowed A. 1 N●t vpon olde men because they li●e not to require them 2 Vpon children because they forget them 3 Vpon dishonest folkes because they will neuer require them Q. VVho are those that see many things farre off but little neere at hand A. Old men blind in the present-tense but for the most part quicke-sighted in the preterimperfect tense Q How comes it that the Husband seekes the wife and not the contrary the wife the Husband A. Because the m●n seekes that which he lost that is his ri● which was taken from him in the forming of Woman out of his side and therefore when a man marries a wife what doth hee but fetch backe the rib which hee first lost Q. What is the choosing of wines fitly compared vnto A. Sir Tho. More was wont to say to the plucking by casualty Eeles out of a Bagge wherein for euerie Eele are twenty Snakes Q. What is the deerest losse of all others A. The losse of time which cannot bee recouered of which one thus complaines Damna fleorerum sed plus fleo Damna dierum Quisque potest rebus succurere nemꝰ diebus Thus Englished The losse of wealth I much lament But more what time decaies For wealth may be regain'd that 's spent But