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A39869
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New dialogues of the dead in three parts / dedicated to Lusian in Elysium ; made English by J.D.; Nouveaux dialogues des mort. English. 1683.
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Fontenelle, M. de (Bernard Le Bovier), 1657-1757.
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1683
(1683)
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Wing F1414; ESTC R28503
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37,395
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159
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died in your Bed in a plain and unremarkable manner Adrian What Are not those Verses remarkable at all which I made as I was just giving up the Ghost My little Soul my dear Darling Thou Going thou art Girl and whither God does know Alone thou goest naked and all over quaking Alas what 'll become of thy pretty fooling humour Lass what 'll become of so many pleasant frolicks I can't guess Cato treated Death like a business that was too serious but you see I drolled with it and herein it is that I pretend that my Philosophy went far beyond Cato's It is not so difficult haughtily to out-brave Death as it is to joak her in a careless manner nor is it so hard a thing to receive her kindly when we call her to our aid as when she comes when we have no need of her M. of Austria Yes I grant Cato's death is not so brave as yours but as ill luck would have it I had not observed that you had made these small Verses in which the bravery of yours does consist Adrian This is the way of all the world Cato may tear out his Bowels rather than fall into the hands of his Enemy it is perhaps no such great matter if it be throughly examined yet such a feat as that makes a vast shew in History and there 's not one but is taken with it Another may die fair and quietly and be in a capacity to make drolling Verses upon his death 't is more than Cato has done but this has nothing in it that is taking and History does scarce take notice of it M. of Austria Alas nothing is truer than what you say And I my self that now speak to you I have a death that I pretend is far before yours and yet 't is less taken notice of 'T is not however a downright death but such as 't is it exceeds yours that does exceed Cato's Adrian How what do you mean M. of Austria I was an Emperor's Daughter I was contracted to a King's Son and this Prince after his father's death sent me back to mine notwithstanding the solemn promise he had made to marry me After this they contracted me to the Son of another King and as I was going by Sea to this Husband my Ship was beaten with a terrible Tempest which cast my life into evident danger Then it was that I made my self this Epitaph Megg that pretty Damsel does here lie Has two Husbands and yet a Maid does die The truth is I did not die that bout but 't was not my fault Conceive well this kind of death you 'l be satisfied with it Cato's Constancy is injured in one kind yours in another mine is natural He is too high you are too drolling I am reasonable Adrian What You tax me of having had too little fear of death M. of Austria I do It is not likely that a man should be in no disorder at his dying hour and I am confident you did force your self then to droll as much as Cato did to tear out his Entrails I am every moment in expectation of Shipwrack without frightning my my self and I mak my Epitaph in cold blood this is very extraordinary and if there were nothing to moderate this History there would be some reason not to believe it or to believe that I did act only by way of Rhodomantado But in the mean while I am a poor Girl twice contracted and yet have been so unlucky as to die a Maid I shew my Concern for it and that gives my History all requisite appearance of truth Your Verses mind them well carry no meaning with them there is nothing but a Gibbrish made up of a few Childish Terms but mine have a very clear Sense and give content at the very first which is a sign that Nature speaks in them much more than in yours Adrian Truly I should never have believed that the trouble to die a Virgin ought to have been so much to your Glory M. of Austria Make your self as pleasant with this as you please but my death if it may be termed so has another especial advantage over Cato's and over yours You had both of you played the Philosophers so much whilst you lived that you had engaged your selves upon Honour not to be afraid of death and if you had had the liberty to fear it I cannot tell what would have come on it But I as long as the storm lasted I had a Right to tremble and make my cries reach Heaven without any body 's taking exception at it or having a less esteem for me Nevertheless I remained quiet enough to make my Epitaph Adrian Betwixt you and I Was not the Epitaph made on Shore M. of Astria Ah! this wrangling thus is ill-becoming I did not so by you about your Verses Adrian I yield then in good earnest and I grant that when Vertue does not go beyond the bounds of Nature she is very great The Fifth Dialogue Erasistrates Herveus Erasistrates YOU tell me wonders What the Blood circulates in the Body the Veins carry it from the Extremities of the Heart and goes from the Heart into the Arteries which convey it back again towards the Extremities Herveus I have shewed so many Experiences of this that no body makes any further question of it Arasist We deceived our selves very much then we Physicians of Antiquity who took the Blood to have but one slow motion from the Heart towards the Extremities of the Body and people are highly obliged to you for having abolished this ancient Error Herv So I pretend And people ought too to be so much the more obliged to me in that I was the first that set them in the way to make all those fine Discoveries as are now made in Anatomy Since I once found out the Circulation of the Blood 't is now who shall find a new Conduit out to convey the Blood into all parts of the Body a new Reservatory It looks as though whole Man were melted down again Behold the advantages our Modern Physick ought to have above yours You made it your business to cure the Body of Man and his Body was altogether unknown to you Erasist I own that your modern Physitians are better Naturalists than we they understand Nature better but they are not better Physitians we cured the Sick as well as they cure them I could wish all these modern ones and you the very first of all had had Prince Antiochus in hand to cure of his Quartern Ague You know how I went about it and how I discovered by the more than ordinary beating of his Pulse in the presence of Stratonice that he was enamoured with that beautifull Queen and that his whole Disease did proceed from his violent striving to hide his Passion And yet I made so difficult and so considerable a Cure as that was without knowing that the blood did circulate and I am of opinion that notwithstanding the help you
own charges the Walls of Thebes which you had beaten down upon condition they would put this Inscription upon them Alexander the Great did beat down these Walls but Phrinea the Courtisan has raised them up again Alex. You were afraid then that future Ages should not know what Trade you had driven Phrin I tell you I had been excellent at it and all persons that are extraordinary in any Profession whatever are possessed with this folly of Monuments and Inscriptions Alex. 'T is true that Rhodopea had this humour before you Her Beauty gained her so much money that with it she built one of those famous Pyramids in Egypt which are standing to this day and I remember that as she was speaking of it the other day to some dead French Ladies who pretended to have been very lovely these Shadows began to weep saying that in the Age and Country where they had lately lived Beauties did not now make advantages whereby to raise Pyramids Phrin But for my part I had that advantage above Rhodopea that in raising up again the Walls of Thebes I made my self equal to you who had been the greatest Conquerour in the World and made it appear that my Beauty was able to repair what your Valour had destroyed Alex. These are two things which certainly did never enter into comparison with one another You are pleased with your self then that you have been so Gallanted Phrin And you you are very well satisfied that you have made desolate the better part of the World Why was there not a Phrinea in each Town which you destroyed There should have remained no signs of your furies Alex. Were I to live again I would again be a famous Conquerour Phrin And I would be a lovely Conquerour Beauty has a natural right to command Men and Valour has but a right gained by force Beauties have a right in all Countries so have not Kings nor Conquerours But yet the better to convince you Philip your Father was a very valiant man so were you too however you would neither of you work any fear into Demosthenes the Oratour who whilst he lived did nothing but inveigh against you both and another Phrinea far beyond me for the name is lucky being likely to lose a Suit in Law of consequence her Lawyer who in vain had spoken his best for her bethought himself of putting by a great Veil which partly covered her and presently upon the sight of her beauty the Judges who were just going to cast her chang'd their minds So the noise of your Arms could not in a long run of years silence an Oratour and the attractives of a fair Creature did in a moment corrupt all Areopagus with its severity Alex. Though you have called another Phrinea to your assistanc I do not believe that Alexanders Party is at all the weaker It would be very sad if ..... Phrin I know what you are going to say to me Graecia Asia Persia the Indies all these make a fine shew Yet if I should withdraw from your glory what does not belong to you upon that score if I did give to your Souldiers to your Captains to Chance it self the share belonging to them don't you think you would be a loser by it But a Fair Lady never shares with any one the honour of her Conquests all is her own Believe me the condition of a pretty Woman is a pretty condition Alex. It has appeared that you have been so perswaded But do you think this part reaches so far as you have pushed it Phrin No no for I am easy of belief I confess I have in an high degree injured the Character of a pretty Woman but you hove done as much by that of a Great Man You and I have conquered too much If I had been contented with two or three Gallantries at the most I had not been irregular and no exceptions could have been taken but to have been galanted to that degree as to have had wherewithall to rebuild the Walls of Thebes that was indeed too too much On the other side if you had conquered Greece only the neighbouring Islands and some little part too perhaps of the Lesser Asia and made up a State of them for your self nothing had been more reasonable but to run on still without knowing whither and be always taking of Towns and know not why and always upon execution without design 't is that that was not approved of by many judicious persons Alex. Let those judicious persons say what they will If I had made use of my valour and good fortune with so much discretion there would scarce have been any talk of me Phrin Nor of me neither if I had been too discreet in the management of my Beauty When one will make a noise only those qualities which seem most reasonable are not the fittest for that purpose The Second Dialogue Milo Smindirides Smindirides THou art very proud then Milo of having carried an Ox on thy shoulders at the Olimpick Games Milo For certain it was a very brave action All Greece did applaud it and the honour of it reached as far as the City of Crotona my native Country which has afforded an infinite number of stout lusty men On the contrary thy City of Sibaris will be cried down to eternity because of the effeminacy of her Inhabitants who banished all Cocks from their Town lest they should be wakened by them and when they made any invitation to persons they invited them a year before-hand that they might have the more leasure to make their Treat with as much daintiness as they would themselves Smin Thou jeerest the Sibarists but thou gross Crotonian dost not thou think that in boasting to have carried an Ox is not to be very like them Milo And thou dost thou believe to have behaved thy self Man-like when thou madest thy complaint that thou hadst passed a night without sleeping because one of the Roses wherewith thy Bed was strewed lay folded in two under thee Smin 'T is true I was so nice as that comes to but why dost thou think it so strange Milo And how can it be but I must think it so Smin What didst thou never see a Lover who being loaded with the favours of a Mistress to whom he had rendred some remarkable services was troubled in the possession of his happiness for fear that grateful acknowledgment should work more in the heart of the Beauty than her inclination Milo No I never saw any such But what if such a thing should be Smin And didst thou never hear talk of some Conqueror who at his return from a glorious Expedition should not be altogether satisfied with his Triumphs because Fortune might have had a greater share than either his Valour or his Conduct and that his designs might have taken upon false and ill grounded Measures Milo No I never heard speak of any such But once again what dost thou infer hereupon Smin That this same Lover and this