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A09911 The young divines apologie for his continuance in the Vniuersitie with certaine meditations, ritten by Nathaniel Povvnoll, late student of Christ-Church in Oxford. Pownall, Nathaniel, 1583 or 4-1610.; Fletcher, Giles, 1588?-1623. 1612 (1612) STC 20174; ESTC S103162 35,832 210

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mee I see no other but a two-edged sword proceed out of his mouth for my destruction and me thinkes hee is a prouiding whips to scourge me out of his Temple returning those stripes those thornes those wounds vpon mee which he hath vnworthily borne for mee denying any more to beare my crosse so that now though I crie vnto him Lord Lord he will not know mee nor suffer mee any more to haue a part in the Sonne of Ishai Since therefore thy sword is drawne O Lord against mee what can I doe but laie downe my necke and submit my selfe to the stroke of that Axe that cutteth downe all vnfruitfull and ill-fruitfull Trees For if euen the death of a sinner and ruine of a wretched soule please thee and may any way satisfie thy Iustice as indeed it cannot for thou delightest not in the death of a sinner oh how willingly should I cast away my selfe with Ionas to accalme the tempest of thine anger against mee but alas it is not my sacrifice can expiate my sins It were a good fruit of my bodie if it might be offered for the sin of my soule but how can that satisfie for sinne which it selfe is most sinnefull O no I confesse O Lord that I haue no other sinne-offering but my repentance left nor other burnt-offering then an aggrieued heart nor other drink-offering then teares nor other incense then my sighes nor other propitiation or Priest and Mediatour then thy selfe O Christ. Thou art our King to protect vs our Prophet to teach vs our Priest to make an attonement for vs and thou hast promised to make vs also Kings Priests and Prophets vnto thy Father but such is my vnworthinesse O Lord that often when I would take vpon mee the Priests office and offer my prayers as thou hast taught mee vnto my Father which is in heauen for pardon that I am quite confounded and haue nothing at all to say for my selfe and though I knowe thou art able to cure my dumbnesse yet it is safer for mee to heare thee open thy mouth to thy Father for mercie then let my mouth be opened to crie for vengeance against my selfe For I more vnnaturall then Caine haue slaine not my yonger brother but my selfe nor my selfe only but my elder brother therefore my blood cannot but with Abells crie to heauen for vengeance against him that spilt it but when I listen what the crie of thy blood my elder brother is whom my sinne hath slaine O how much better things doe I heare it speake then the blood of Abel Father forgiue him besides if I speake for my selfe my words are like the winde that passe away and goe I know not whither but most likely with my selfe into the Land where all things are forgotten but thine are like thine owne essence O Lord who art the eternall word such as heauen and earth may sooner passe away thē one tittle of thē Do thou therfore O gratious Sauiour speake and mediat for me let the many wounds inflicted on thee for my sinnes be as so many mouthes to craue mercie for me O let thy blood as when thou wert wounded it fel on the base earth be distilled also by the grace and merit thereof vpon me a vile and vnworthy sinner how happie were I if as thou madest Adam of red earth so thou hadst made me of that fruitfull red ground which thou vouchsafedst to water with thine owne blood Let thy stripes O Christ goe for the many stripes wherewith I as an euill seruant deserue to be beaten thy death for that eternall death my sinnes haue as their hire deserued and thy descent into hell for mine to free me from thence Indeede if thou wert as man is prone to anger nay were thine anger kindled but a little and were not thy mercy rather as farre aboue mans reason as his merit how long since had I perished from the land of the liuing If I looke vpon my sinnes me thinks I should alwaies see thee before me as thine Angel in the way of Baalim with the sword of thy iustice drawne against me vpon which as mad men doe vpon weapons my sinnes make mee wilfully to runne and I seem to my selfe to lie as Isaac vnder thy sword for sacrifie still expecting when thou shouldst come by mee in the whirlewindes earthquakes and tempests of thy iudgements yet to see how thou that no man might denie it to proceed only of grace and not of merit chusest rather to come in the still and soft voice of thy mercies euen vnto vs sinners wilt that thy holy spirit the spirit of meeknes come down rather in the forme of a doue without gal thē of a consuming fire vnto vs. How far art thou from desiring the death of a sinner that whē we were both branch and roote vnder the Axe of thy iudgements and as Isaac readie to be sacrificed and made a sinne offring didst prouide thy selfe a Lambe yea thy selfe the Lambe to saue vs and to set vs free How readie art thou to snatch the perishing brand out of the fire how soone entreated to forbeare and spare the fruitlesse figtree not doing that vnto the dry tree which thou hast done vnto the greene O see if euer there were loue like thy loue thy loue and mercie as thy selfe transcending all If euer thou repentest it is of thine anger not of thy mercie if euer thou hearest not our prayers it is because they tend to our owne hurt if thou hidest thy face it is that we might seek thee and if thou fliest frō vs that we might follow after thee more eagerly if thy iustice take vengeance it shall bee onely vpon those that hate thee and in thē but to the fourth generation but if thy mercie begin to shewe it selfe it will content it selfe with no lesse then a thousand generations O thou immortall goodnes and beauty of heauen draw me vnto thee with the bands of thy loue and with the same cordes bind me that I breake not from thee let me be ward vnto the King of heauen thy grace be my Guardian Then shal mine inheritāce and my lines fall vnto mee in a faire Land euen in the vineyard and Paradise of my God whereof though the first could not yet the second Adam with his blood as Nabaoth hath kept possession out of which neither the serpent nor all the powers of darknes shal be euer able to expell me so thou onely but suffer the weak hand of my faith to lay hold on thy crosse and to eate of the fruit of that tree of life For if thou be with me I shall be safe death shall haue no sting sinne no poyson hell no victorie For thou hast ouercome all the power of hell and death not for thy selfe ouer whome it could haue no power but for vs whose weakenesse could make no resistance but if thou absent thy selfe though but for a while my weake faith which had the boldnes to cast me out vpon the sea of thy mercie that so with Peter I might meete thee walking vpon the waters will neuer haue the courage if it see the waues rise to vphold it self Lord stretch out thy hand and saue me from sinking and so henceforth binde the sacrifice with cords vnto the Altar fasten me vnto thy crosse O Christ and spread thy selfe in thy merits and mercies as Elias vpon me that I may recouer life and though out of due season be borne vnto thee O graunt me any one of the menest places of the many mansions of thy Fathers house and when Israel thy chosen children and thy invited Ghests set with thee at thy great marriage feast and many come from East to West to set with Abraham in thy kingdom when thy seruants are placed may but I take the lowest place at thy table so when thou hast fedde thousands behold thee breaking vnto me but of thy broken bread or but be suffered to gather vp the crummes vnder that heauenly table and my hungrie and thirstie soule satisfied with that angelicall Manna made drunk with the pleasures of thy house shall neuer hunger or thirst more In the mean time while I dwell in this corruptible Tabernacle O let that grace of thine which shines vpon thy worthier Seruants if any worthy vnder whose roofe thou shouldst come as thou visitest other Publicans and sinners turne in vnto thy Seruants house and dine with him FINIS Plutarch Gen. 43.9 Gen. 28.12 Isa. 37.3 1. Sam. Harmon pag. 117. Plutarch in Ages Gen. 49.6 Revel Matt. 25.9 Iob 40.18 Pers. Sat. 1. Bion apud Laert. Plut. Ier. 48.10 Eccl. 10.16 1. Cor. 3.2 part 3. c. 26. Matt. 23.4 1. Tim 3 6. Iudg. 4. Matt. 7.17 King on Ionas 2. Sam. 18.23 Isa. 54.1 Plin. l. 35. Cael. Rh. Cicer. Aristot. l. 2 Phys. Act. 17.18 Ioh. 9.6 Aquin. Eccl. 4.17 Prou. 6.9 10. Cicer. de Orat. Epist. ad Luc. Aul. Gell. Confess ●●b 4. Alex. ab Alex. Epist. 1. Cor. 9.16 Ps. 137.6 Ps. 137.5 Cicer. Tusc. qu. Luk. 10.41 Deut 5.29 Chrysost. Iudg 7. 1. Sam. Ter ●un Exod. 3. Ezek. 3.14 Ion. 1. Paul in vita Ambr. In eius vita à scipso scripta Possido Aug. Epist. 148. ad Val. Homil. 3. in acta Apost Matt. 9.38 Aug Epist. 148. in inst Quint. Curt. Matt. 22.37 Aug. epist. Act. 20.24 Act. 20.24 Phil. 2.12 In tersinitum insinitum c. Prolog in lib. Retr Num. 11 2● Plut. Eph. 3.8 Greg. Rom. 11.33 Preface in Lull Psal. 42.7 Hipp. proem in Apho Possidor in eius vita 1. De Nat. Deor. Rom. 13.12 Ezek. 47.3 Cic. Totis artubus contremisco 2. Cor. 2.17 Tull. l. 1. de nat Deor. Calvin in Exod. 30 ●3 Gen. 23.15 Plin. l 35. Plut. Laert. Tu iurabis c. Luk. 2. Ioseph antiq Gregor de curâ Past. part 3. c. 26 Possidor 2. Tim. 4 1. Seneca magni emit qui precatur ad finem Epist. predict 1. Sam. 17.28 29. Eccl. 12.
saith of physicke which concernes the health of the bodie is much more true in Diuinitie which concernes the health of the soule that vita breuis ars longa it is not the short span or scantling of any mortalls life can measure the length thereof but euen the Angels and Saints in heauen after this liues vnperfit glasse is broken find worke enough in this diuine study to employ themselues for all eternitie No wonder then if all our indeauours in compare can do no more then according to S. Augustines vision walking by the sea side in deepe contemplation of the Trinitie as if a child with a cockle shell should labour by continual lauing to empty the maine ocean sea into a little ditch the one if we looke here for exact comprehension beeing as endlesse as the other And though it be a fond ridiculous question that Velleius the epicure makes in Tullie that if God did indeed make the world how or whence had he ferramenta machinas instruments great enough for so great a worke yet it may with better reason be doubted how a mortall man can possibly frame fit instruments proportionate to the immensitie of such an immortall worke For when all is done as a Philosopher said all our knowledge makes not vp the least part of our ignorance yea as a father better obserued our highest degree of knowledge is to professe ignorance since what we see here we see but vnperfectly as in a glasse these imperfect shadowes beeing onely conueied as it were by setting perspectiue glasses from so farre a distance as the heauen and earth are distant Since then all our liues labour can attaine to little more then the alphabet and rudiments of this infinite studie blame me not if I hauing yet scarce dipt my foote nor gone vp to the anckles in that riuer of Ezechiel be somewhat timorous how I goe further on before I haue fathomed the depth thereof and found some foord or passage For if the greatest Orators at the Rostra beeing to speake but before the people in ciuil affaires as Tullie often professeth of himselfe did quake euery ioynt of them and according to the Poet Lugdunensem rhetor dicturus ad aram Palluit vt nudis qui pressit calcibus anguem were so appalled as if they walked among snakes because they ventured in triall the extreame hazard of their fame credit for euer after how much more ought we to feare and tremble standing in his Temple the place where his honour dwelleth and speaking in the sight of God Men and Angels And therefore I thinke I haue the same reason to borrow respite as that Philosopher had to deferre his resolution from day to day of Hieroes question concerning God because the further I goe and the more I thinke of these Diuine mysteries the more difficulties I meet withall I must confesse indeede there was a time heretofore when dulce bellum inexperto I thought I might with as great facilitie promise and performe a sermon as I had done heretofore a declamation but as while the sun shines not the house seemes cleare but the sunne-beames once shining in at the windowes so thicke of motes and dust that it hath gained a prouerbs place to make comparison of thicknes thereunto so now not before that I am a little inlightened and entred I see those wants and imperfections that before in the shadow of Philosophie I neuer dreamed of and those difficulties I heretofore did little thinke of Indeed if I could content my selfe with a perfunctorie performance as many doe it may be little ado would serue the turne but I dare not so take vp my rest when as my very soule and eternall life is at stake and pawne vpon it fully perswading my selfe that if my paines exceed not the complementall formalitie of these Pharisies I shall neuer come to the kingdome of heauen Wherefore as the shekel of the Sanctuarie as interpreters do gather from diuers passages of Scripture was double to the commō shekel so doe I well perceiue that double paines and space to that I heretofore bestowed in my other studies of Phosophie and humanitie is requisite to sanctifie me for the Lords Sanctuarie and howsoeuer it may be faultie in other ciuill and worldly affaires which Apelles was wont to reprehend in curious Protogenes Quòd manum de tabula continere non potuit thinking it neuer perfect enough yet in Diuinitie Zeuxis reason will answer any that is reasonable Diu pingo quia pingo immortalitati that as he was wont to be long a drawing because he desired so to drawe that it might last for euer so in this diuine studie we must haue the longer leaue to limate the lineaments of our portraicts because the impresses we make are to hold their impression for al eternitie Experience teacheth vs that euery triuiall mechanick trade doth ask at least seauen yeares apprentiship or learning for so the French word signifieth and that so much more time is allotted to each worke by how much the worke is more exquisite how then can they be excused that so farre abase the valuation hereof as though there were no difference betweene prophesying and selling doues in the Temple and in stead of polishing the corner stones of the Temple for hast daube it vp with vntempered mortar I feare I confesse the woe of such negligent workmen and feare withall I should prooue no better did I like those hot-spurres vnripe and vnready as I am make so suddain an adventure For as those captiue kings said of Gedeons young and therefore vnwarlike son Such as the man is such is his strength no wonder if as young Dauid I cannot yet march in compleat armour neither yet vpon the strength of a little meat dare Eliah-like vndertake so great a iourney neither yet in this weakenes venture in publike into the open aire to my further danger but rather keepe close within till I growe the stronger There was fiue yeares silent hearing enioyned a Pythagorist for the learning of his symbolls and therefore with safety may I a while awaite like Elihu vpon the words of the ancient thereby to aspire to the knowledge of our christian mysteries And indeed our Vniuersities hath well prouided in this case calling none to publique course of preaching till he be of fowre yeares stāding Master of arts which authoritie though it might iustly sway me since when we proceede we are bound by a formall oath to keepe the customes as well as the statutes and priuiledges of the Vniuersitie yet haue I also a greater authoritie then that for my warrant euen that of our Sauiour to passe the like example of Iohn Baptist his Coetanean born the same yeare who beeing the wisedome of his Father in whome is the fulnesse of all graces so that he could aswell haue preached at twelue yeares old as haue disputed with Doctors yet