something to it before Prayer often exhorting his family to a reverend demeanor of themselves in the worship of God and would be much troubled when he understood or discerned any thing to the contrary Once a week for the most part he did catechise both Children and servants either out of the Assemblies or his own Scriptural Catechism and explained it to them And once a fortnight if not diverted by urgent occasion he went over some principle of Religion opening and explaining it in a Catiehistical way which his Children and Servants were to give him an account of the next fortnight and when they had so done he proceeded to another principle and thus he did from time to time What sermons the Youth of the family heard upon the Lords day or at any other time they gave an account thereof to him as they could remember He kept private days of Humiliation with his family as often as he could gain opportunity for it on which days he would if not prevented deal particularly with every one or as many as he had time for that was under his charge about the matters of their Souls And took care that all in his family should call upon God and Pray to him in secret as well as be present at family duty And when any of his Brethren came to vsit him He was not willing to let them depart without Prayer His Family was an house of Prayer These his labours in his family God blessed and succeeded to the Spiritual good of several that came under his roof He was most tenderly conscientious in keeping holy the Sabbath day whereof he was a strict observer and took care that all under his roof should do the same He kept a very severe watch not only over his words and actions but his very thoughts also Quickly reflecting thereon not only when vain and sinful but when impertinent to the holiness and duty of the day whereof he hath left the following testimonies April 29. 1666. My heart was much out of frame upon the Lords day full of vain and Sinful thoughts As I was going to prayer in the Afternoon alone God brought to remembrance Ps 40. 12 17. Innumerable evils have Compassed me about mine iniquities have taken hold upon me so that I am not able to look up yet the Lord thinketh upon me This was a stay to me Apr. 4. I went forth on several occasions None of them succeeded The first Contrivance of that journey was cast into my thoughts on the Lords day in a time of prayer I laid it aside till Monday and then considered further of it and saw it convenient for the best ordering of my affairs But not humbling my soul for those contrivances so unseasonably arising in my mind I was crossed in them Hereupon I determined for time to come when any thoughts or contrivances about ordering my affairs were cast into my mind on Lords days or on other days in time of holy duties to lay them aside till a more convenient time and if upon deliberation that way of ordering my affairs seems best which was cast into my mind in time of holy duties I would not hereupon neglect that way lest Satan should get advantage of me but I would first humble my Soul for its wanderings and suffering such thoughts to arise so unseasonably and took to Christ for pardon of the irregularities of my heart and then not fear to order my affairs in that way that seems most agreeable to reason and neerest the rule of Gods word though the Contrivance was first cast into my mind at an unseasonable time Having a letter of Spiritual advice and Counsel to write to a friend and having no spare time but on the Lords day to do it I was doubtful whether I might spend some part of that day on such imployment As I was musing on my bed what I had best do that Scripture came to my mind Rev. 1. 10 11. I was in the Spirit on the Lords day and I heard a Voice saying what thou seest Write in a Book and send it to the seven Churches Whence I Concluded it to be Lawful to write as well as read hear meditate and discourse of spirital matters on the Lords day His Charity had no less measure than the rest of his Graces which he accounted one of the best characters of a Christian Lamenting sometimes the divisions among Professors of religion he would say He did not value a Christian by his great knowledg and eminent parts but by his great Charity and Love to his Brethren This he extended to various Sorts of objects as Towards those who were at difference one with another He was an industrious peace-maker offering himself to interpose to make up the breach taking journeys when at distance in order to it Towards those that had difference with himself about worldly concernes from which he was not altogether free though altogether innocent when he suffered wrong by any his care was that they should suffer none by him or his either in word or deed always practising himself and counselling others to do good against evil He would make the best construction that was possible of the words and actions of his adversaries often making mention of that Scripture 1 Cor. 13. 5. Charity thinketh no evil Towards his Friends his Friendship was hearty ingenuous faithful and open He received them into his house gladly entertained them liberally conversed with them cheerfully sympathised with them in their afflictions affectionately and served them as he had occasion industriously Towards those that persecuted him and others for Conscience and Religions sake he observed the command of Christ Math. 5. 44. He affcctionately pitied them and prayed for them daily And when he heard any passionate expressions against them for their violence and unrighteousness he would be offended and charge people to pray more earnestly for them and seek opportunities to do them good Towards those that dissented from him in the matters of God he had a Spirit of meekness and forbearance embracing all with Christian Love whose practice did not destroy their profession of Christianity Colchester was a very divided place when he was called thither upon the account of diverse persuasions yet he so behaved himself with all humility modiration tenderness Brotherly kindness aad Charitable judgment that they were generally united in their respects and esteem for him And though he could not with Satisfaction to his Conscience conform to all that the Law required yet he judged many that did to be very Good men and had a real Honour for them Towards the poor and such as were reduced to streights and difficulties in this world he was pitiful and bountiful He devised liberall things and drew out his Soul to the hungry In the exercise whereof he observed our Saviours rule Math. 6. 1 2 3. This indeed was one of his secrets which he always industriously concealed as much as he could Yet variety of objects bare
but of God Joh. 1. 13. and that God giveth power to the faint and strength to them that have no might in a way of waiting Isa 40. 29 31. I saw from these considerations further ground of hope and waiting upon God notwithstanding I find my strength perished from me Neither shall the guilt of my Sin discourage me from waiting on God from expecting of his Holy Spirit from going to Christ The whole need not a Physitian Christ deales with Sinners Mar. 2. 17. He hath said he will in no wise cast out them that come to him Joh. 6. 37. why did he shed his blood to wash away our sins How is he the Lamb of God that taketh away the sins of the world if he should cast off guilty Souls when they come unto him Is there not a fountain opened for sin and for uncleanness to wash in Zach. 13. 1. What though I be in my blood yet if I go to Christ he will not loath me Ezek. 16. 6 8. but will sprinkle clean water upon me and wash me from my filthyness Ezek. 36. 25. When therefore I find guilt upon me I will look to Jesus Christ in such promises as these Isa 1. 18. 43. 25 26. 44. 21 22. I will cry unto him that I may have the pardon of my sin Sealed up to my Soul in these promises by his Holy Spirit Neither shall my rebellious heart the perverseness and corruption of my Nature discourage me but I will with David beg a new heart and a right Spirit Ps 51. 10. I will say as Ephraim Jer. 31. 18. Turn thou me and I shall be turned God hath sent Christ to bless us in turning us from our iniquities Act. 3. 26. and to destroy what Satan hath wrought in us 1. Joh. 3. 8. therefore when I feel sin prevail and lead me captive I will with Paul cry out of this body of death Rom. 7. 24. and go to God in Jesus Christ through such promises as these Mic. 7. 18 19. Rom. 6. 14. Math. 11. 28. Isa 45. 22. Jer. 31. 33. Ezek. 36. 26. When I feel my self graceless I will look to him who is full of grace Joh. 1. 14. 16. and hath promised to give grace Ps 84. 11 even an heart to love him Deut. 30. 6. and to put his fear into us Jer. 32. 40. and to withhold no good thing if we endeavour to walk uprightly before him Ps 84. 11. When I find the plague of an hard dead heart upon me I will look unto the Lord who quickens the dead Rom. 4. 17. and can raise Children to Abraham out of Stones Math. 3. 9. I will look unto him in his Covenant promising to take away the heart of Stone and to give an heart of flesh Ezek. 36. 26. In time of desertion when God withdraws the comfortable influences of his presence I will not be discouraged but I will search my heart and try my ways and see what cause I have given the Lord to depart from me Lam. 3. 40. Josh 7. 11. 12 13. Isa 59. 2. I will earnestly seek the Lord that he would return and shine upon me and lift up the light of his countenance upon my Soul Ps 80. 3. 89. 46. Hos 5. 15. I will not only pray but wait for his return Ps 130. 5 6. Isa 8. 17. Lam. 3. 2 3. c. with 26. and in waiting I will look unto the Lord in these or like promises Ps 103. 8 9. Isa 54. 6 7 8. 57. 16 17 18. Lam. 3. 31 32. Hos 6. 1 2 3. Joh. 14. 18. When I have neglected my watch and fallen and been unstedfast in Covenant with God I will not despair but look to God in Christ that he would pardon my sin grant me repentance and restore me The Covenant of grace admits of repentance after sin Levit. 26. 21. 40. 41 42. Yea God hath exalted Christ to give repentance Act. 5. 31. hath promised to heal back-slidings Hos 14. 4. invites backsliders to return Jer. 3. 1 12 13 14. How did David behave himself when Iniquities prevailed over him He goeth to God to purge away his transgression Ps 65. 3. he maketh Supplication to God that he would not cast him out of his presence Ps 51. 11. he confesseth his sin and God pardons him Ps 32. 5. which should encourage all the Godly when they have fallen to return to the Lord ver 6. St. John layeth strict charge upon Believers that they sin not but in case of Sin he would not have them despair 1 Joh. 2. 1 2. Solomon prayed to this purpose 1 Kings 8. and God accepted ch 9 3. When therefore thou hast fallen O my Soul by thine iniquity and God hid his face and withdraws his gracious presence let thy uncircumcised heart be humbled accept of the punishment of thy sin Turn unto the Lord and and say Take away all iniquity and receive me graciously So will I praise thee Lev. 26. 41. Hos 14. 2. Let not thy falls cause thee to depart from the Living God Though thou hast played the harlot with many Lovers yet the Lord calleth thee to return Jer. 3. 1. God commands us to forgive our Brother seven times a day if he return and repent Luk. 17. 4. yea not only seven times but seventy times seven Math. 18. 21 22. And will not God much more forgive us though we fall oft if we return and seek his face Seeing his ways are far above our ways Isa 55. 7 9. Dec. 9. 1655. Having found much formality in my duties on the Sabbath and seeing my self lost in them I put the question to my Soul what if thou die this night What is thy hope How wilt thou appear before God Righteousness of thine own thou hast none to trust to thou seest how thou sinnest every day and how full of sin thy best duties are Upon this enquiry the good Spirit of God brought to my remembrance 1 Cor. 1. 30. God hath made Christ Righteousness to us and Jer. 23. 6. This is the Name by which he shall be called The Lord our Righteousness which was comfort to me and enquiring what warrant I had to believe my self to be a sharer in this Righteousness and that I stand accepted of God by vertue of this Righteousness I saw from Rom. 3. 21 22. that this Righteousness is upon all that believe Now through the Lords goodness and to his Praise be it spoken I have oftimes found my heart not only to long after pardon and renovation but to trust in Christ and in God through him for pardoning mercy and renewing grace and all other good things Dec. 16. I found the Lord graciously present with me in my morning meditation on my Bed And my Soul was much refreshed with Mr. Simond's Sermon God spake a sutable word by him to my Soul from Mat. 15. 23. But he answered her not a word God may sometimes defer to give an Answer to a gracious and well qualified Prayer 1. To correct our
an evident Answer of Prayer and a fulfilling of that promise Prov. 28. 27. He that giveth unto the poor shall not lack April 24. Being desired to go to a poor Christian I promised to go there being only two Maids in the house I considered whether it might not prove some scandal to go but considering also she was a Member of Christ and therefore I ought to Administer to her Soul I resolved to commit the taking care of my Name to the Lord and to do my duty I begged of him that he would secure me from reproach and as I went an honest poor man met me to whom I told whither I was going and asked him to go along with me he was willing and did so I looked upon him as sent by the Providence of God in Answer to my Prayer These were some of those observations and experiences which he recorded during his continuance at Cambridge Upon his removal from thence he intermitted this practice for some years but resumed it again Octob. 1662. God put it into my heart as at other times so especially on Wednesdays the day on which I was wont to Preach my Lecture when I was not diverted by some unexpected Providence to lament after the Lord who had cast me out of my employment in his Vineyard and to seek to him for a discovery of the cause for which he contends with me and that he would shew me for what sin or sins he hath sent this sad affliction and that he would give me a sanctified use thereof by purging out my sins and making me more holy and that he would restore me again to some employment in his Vineyard when and where it shall seem good in his sight Being sad and dejected because I had sinned now I was under the afflicting hand of God I was very much revived by Isa 57. 17 18. I smote him he went on in the way of his own heart I have seen his ways and will heal him Having afterward sinned again and been over-powred by a corruption which had oft prevailed over me I was caused to observe from that Scripture further that it was not only a single Act of sin which was committed but he went on in the way of his heart and God saith I have seen his ways and will heal him It was a stay to my Faith Here I observe what I have often found viz. 1. Dejection is a fore-runner of Consolation Seldom have I had trouble upon my Spirit but if I have eyed and followed after God he hath took it off by some word of promise 2. The observing and pondering of every word and Circumstance in a promise is of great use as it hath been to me 3. God openeth his promises gradually sometimes hinting and discovering one thing and then another in the promise Being foiled by sin I was raised to my former hope and affiance in God by Phil Children of God till the coming of Christ Being another time foiled with the same corruption and my heart sinking in a despondent frame I was much revived from Jam. 4. 5. 6. He giveth more grace Where I saw that even our strongest sins such as our corrupt natures are most prone to and are deeply rooted in our hearts and Spirits are conquerable by Gods grace Being troubled that I had sinned against God under his Correcting hand and having thereby lost my former Comfort which God had spoken to my Soul after my former backslidings I sighed over the great Treachery and unstedfastness of my heart and casting about in my thoughts where I should find a sutable word to fix on God brought to my remembrance Isa 48. 8 9. I knew that thou wouldest deal very Treacherously for my Names sake will I defer my Anger While I was musing and pondering hereon and had new hope put into me the Lord let in further Comfort and encouragement from vers 10 11. which is rendred by Piscat Behold I will refine thee and I will make thee a choice one in the furnace of affliction for mine own sake even for mine own sake will I do it Which gave me abundant refreshment and did marvellously strengthen my hope in God This was given me in when I had set apart some time to humble my Soul Apr. 5. 1665. I set apart that day for Fasting and Prayer on behalf of my Daughter Elianor that had been so long sick and in the Evening had my Faith revived from Isa 44. 3 I will pour my Spirit upon thy seed Apr. 7. I began the day with discourse with some Friends before I had been at my private Communion with God I met with a gentle Rebuke from the Providence of God in my Family Affairs and my heart was flat in Family duty and straitned in private I took this as an Item to begin with God before I converse with men In the Evening God came in graciously to me in my Family Exercise Apr. 9. Lords day I was much discomposed in my Spirit in the Morning by reason of a foil sin had given me the Evening before Satan would have boat me off from Preaching in my Family but I performed my Morning exercise and continued dejected till the Evening and then in Family Prayer God graciously revived me with that promise Hos 11. 10. They shall walk after the Lord in Connexion with vers 7. my people are bent to backsliding though they called them to the most high none at all would exalt him Where two things were a great relief to my Faith 1. God promiseth they should walk after him notwithstanding their habitual proness to backslide from God 2. Notwithstanding their refusing to exalt the Lord though called to it Yet within a little time I was again foiled by my corruption which made me see what a poor creature I was it left of God to my self May. 8. At eleven of the Clock at night my daughter Elianor died after a long Sickness God gave me several opportunities of recommending her Soul to him in prayer at some whereof my heart was much affected and my faith and hope acted on God for the eternal welfare of her Soul which made her departure easie to me My grounds were Gen. 17. I will establish my Covenant between me and thee and thy seed after thee for an everlasting Covenant to be a God to thee and thy seed after thee I considered that this Covenant is to give life Mal. 2. 5. And whereas the thoughts of the Child 's Original and actual Sins as frowardness c. might make me fearful of its estate It was brought to my mind that the Covenant is to give pardon of sin Heb. 8. 10 12. And whereas faith and regeneration are necessary to Salvation I considered further that the Covenant is to give all things necessary to Salvation 2 Sam. 23. 5. this is all my Salvation Besides the Consideration of the Covenant God gave me other encouragements to hope in reference to my Child as from Math. 19. 14.
God is a Spirit of truth and of life too Communicateth both grace and Gifts and teacheth as well 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 as 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Both which consisted together in this excellent person The word of God dwelt both in his Head and Heart and was effectually the Law of his Life He was a Burning as well as Shinning Light A man more than ordinarily mortified to the pleasures of the Flesh and vanities of the World freely and resolvedly devoted to the fear of God His Conversation was in Heaven his Communion with God his Delight in the Saints his Business Religion his Zeal for Holiness his main Design the glorifying of God and the Salvation of his own and others Souls Whereof the following Pages will I doubt not be an abundant Evidence not only to the Charitable but Rational judgment of the Christian Reader As for his practice of Mortification I shall not otherwise express it than in his own words as I read it in the records of the remarkable passages of his life by his own hand but after he had a family viz. Having been foiled by the lusts of my own Heart several times and considering what I should do to get rid of those lusts which had so often prevailed over me God directed me to three several means The one was suggested to me as I was walking in my garden and meditating on the affairs of my Soul and that was to be more frequent in Eyeing applying and meditating on the promises and the Scripture which the Holy Spirit of God set before me for this end was 2 Pet. 1. 4. By the precious promises given to us we escape the pollution that is in the world through lust The other was suggested to me as I was hearing a Sermon and that was to be daily applying the Lord Jesus to my soul grounded on Rom. 13. 13. 14. where the Apostle adviseth to put on the Lord Jesus Christ as an help against chambering and wantonness strife and envying The third was suggested to me as I was riding abroad and discoursing of the things of God which was Gal. 5. 16. Walk in the Spirit and ye shall not fulfill the lusts of the flesh In pursuance of these means for the mortifying of the lusts of the flesh I determined with my self to Eye the promises of God more frequently then I had done and to that end I chose out some promises of daily and continual use and determined by the help of God to salute and embrace them once a day and not only to take a view of them my self but in my meditations and soliloquies to spread them before God and to put the Lord in remembrance of them For supplying all the wants of the day I chose that promise Phil. 4. 19. for growth in grace Hos 14. 5. for subduing my sins Mic. 7. 19. Rom. 6. 14. for success in my undertakings Ps 1. 3. for turning all the events of the day for good to me Rom. 8. 28. for the conversion and sanctification of my children Isa 44. 3. for my yoke-fellow and servants and all others in my family that they might get good from me and return to God and grow in grace Hos 14. 7. for sanctifying of my afflictions Isa 27. 9. Zech. 13. 9. for audience of my prayers Mic. 7. 7. Joh. 14. 13. 14. for grace and strength to manage all the works of the day to the glory of God Zech. 10. 12. for protection from dangers and casualties Gen. 15. 1. for giving me eternal life in case the day should bring death to me Luk. 12. 32. Joh. 3. 16. for counsel and direction in all cases of difficulty and unexpected emergencies Isa 58. 11. Ps 32. 8. I judged it also very conducible to the Glory of God and my own soul's good to manage all my employments as much as may be with an eye to the promises and as to my calling when I am studying to compose Sermons Deut. 28. 8. when I go to preach Math. 28. 19. 20. for success in my preaching Isa 56. 8. 65. 23. I was the more confirmed in this frequent and familiar converse with the promises not only as it helps on our participation of the Divine nature and our escaping the pollution that is in the world through lust but because the Lord commands us to be alwaies mindful of his covenant 1 Chron. 16. 15. and it pleaseth God to see us taking hold of his Covenant Isa 56. 4. and it is for the Glory of God 2 Cor. 1. 20. I determined also when I should feel the workings of any lust presently to look up to Jesus Christ It being the remedy which the Holy Ghost prescribes against such sins as do most easily beset us Heb. 12. 1. 2. I have often been encouraged and helped in this practice of looking unto Jesus to subdue my sins from Act. 3. ult God sent his Son Jesus to bless us in turning us every one from his iniquities Beza's note upon that text is very good and hath been of use to me viz. that the great word for inquities signifies the roots and habits of Sin I saw it was my duty and concernment every day to be more frequent in applying my soul to Christ and Christ his benefits to my soul In pursuance of the 3d means of mortification viz. walking in the spirit I resolved to endeavour to do my works and duties both to God and men more spiritually and in order hereunto to reduce my actings to some word and as oft as I could to eye some word of God as I was entring on them as for instance If I be called out by others or stirred up in my own Spirit to visit the sick or any afflicted person to have my thoughts on Math. 25. 36. or Jam. 1. 27. when any poor people come to me for relief or any object of charity is presented to me to eye Gal. 6. 10. or Hebr. 13. 16. or Isa 58. 10. or Eccl. 11. 1. or prov 19. 17. when a poor man cometh to borrow Deut. 15. 7. 8. 10. When to write letters take a journey or be any ways employed for others Gal. 5. 13. Phil. 2. 4. when to visit out of courtesy or do any thing which courtesy requireth 1 Pet. 3. 8. when to instruct my Servants and Children Deut. 6. 7. Gen. 18. 19. when to Catechise the youth that come to my family Joh. 21. 15. Prov. 22. 6. when invited to exercise abroad among poor or rich Isa 32. ult when to administer a reproof Lev. 19. 17. when to confer about Spiritual things Mal. 3. 17. This was the wise and holy method which this faithful Servant and Souldier of Jesus Christ prescribed to himself by Divine direction whereby to manage the Spiritual War with the sin that dwelt in him that he might not be overcome with it According to which he moreover charged himself with the practice of universal positive Holiness which he thus records Being under the rebukes of Gods chastising
more precious and I was encouraged to go on with confidence And I determined to eye this promise for the future when I should go forth where I might probably meet with disturbance Dec. 25. 65. As I was reading in my course Luke 6. I observed from v. 11 12. from Christs practice who in those days when his Enemies were filled with madness against him and Communed one with another what they might do unto him went out into a Mountain to pray and continued all night in prayer to God I observed I say hence that it was my duty to give my self much unto prayer at such times as I had any Enemies that laid wait for me to do me hurt Within a day or two after one of the Constables came to me and told me that his fellow Constable when he had drunk somewhat liberally opened his heart to him and told him that there had been some Communication between him and one of the Deputy Lieutenants about presenting me at the Sessions and about my Meetings I thought upon that place in Luke 6. 11 12. after he was gone and went up into my Chamber to pray And as I was meditating on this matter that Scripture Deut. 33. 12. was brought to my remembrance The beloved of the Lord shall dwell in safety by him c. I was strengthened in my adherence to this promise because God had lately made out his love to my Soul as I was pleading this promise in prayer that passage was set home He shall cover thee all the day long Whence I did hope that the Lord who had helped me hitherto would still cover me under the shadow of his wings After I had been at prayer I considered Jacobs carriage when he was in danger of suffering by his brother Esau After he had been wrestling with God in prayer and pleading the promise he betook himselfto the use of the most probable means for appeasing Esau I also used the most probable means to prevent trouble at the ensuing Sessions and it pleased God so to order things at the Sessions that I met with no trouble Blessed be God who alone maketh me to dwell in safety Jun. 22. As I was exercising in my Family in the Afternoon several of my friends being with me I had word sent me that the Mayor and Justices would come down to my house whereupon being near the end of my Exercise I quickly concluded After I had done and dismissed the people one of the Constables came to me and told me he was sent to dissolve my Meeting but had a trembling upon him when he spake to me He added that he blessed God that had given him an heart to come some times himself and his Wife to my Meetings so that instead of doing me any hurt he gave glory to God that inclined him to come to hear me In Octob. 1670. I was presented in the Ecclesiastical Court for Preaching But God stood by me and encouraged me with that word Ps 103. 31. And though my Adversaries proceeded so far as to get out an Excommunication against me yet the Lord raised up deliverance for me that the Court took off my Excommunication without appearing before them or paying any Fees Yea so far was he from declining the exercise of his Ministry for fear of suffering that when he had been persuaded thereto by the importunity of friends he was much dissatisfied concerning which thus he records I promised Mr. B. to Preach at White Colne on Octob. 23. accordingly on Saturday I was prepared to go H. P. came in and told us that the Soldiers had seized Mr. B. and imprisoned him and that it would not be safe for me to go at that season all my friends and Relations dissuaded me but notwithstanding my mind stood to go But being importuned to stay and having been very lately sought after by name by the Soldiers in those parts and weighing the Providence in sending H. P. to my house with this Intelligence as I was about to take Horse I determined to cast my self on my Brother Cole's determination who was then at my house and he determining that I should not go I stayed at home But that night and the next day I was under much despondency of Spirit for missing such an opportunity of Service yet God was gracious to me and revived me It was some stay to my mind what I read Mat. 16. 20. Where I observed that the divulging of the most necessary truths was at some seasons and in some places prohibited by Jesus Christ I was further satisfied from Act. 16. 6 7. whence I observed that the frustrating of our Attempts and designs to Preach the Gospel to particular places that we purposed to go to did sometimes arise from the Holy Ghost And from Psal 52. 9. I had a damp upon my Spirit and was hindred from praising God for my deliverance from my Enemies hands because I had missed an opportunity of Service But this Scripture convinced me that I ought to praise God for this Providence though attended with some afflicting Circumstances By these Scriptures and Prayer I obtained satisfaction and the Lord Answered my desire and fully quieted my mind Once a very zealous and active Prosecutor of the Non-conformists obtained a Warrant against him upon the Oxford Act directed to all the Chief Constables and petty-Constables in the County to apprehend him Accordingly an Officer a stranger came to Execute it and when he was nigh the house he espied two persons whom by their habit he judged to be Ministers walking in a field the one was Mr. Stockton the other Mr. Senior of Hackney whom God hath also lately taken away He hasteneth to them and told them he had a Warrant against one of them but he knew neither Mr. Senior asked which of them He Answered Mr. Stockton Let me see your Warrant said Mr. Senior he shewed it him verily concluding from thence that he was the man Some Little Girls were there walking with them who did industriously cling to Mr. Senior as if he had been their Father which further confirmed him in his Error While Mr. Senior read the Warrant and the Officer was intent upon him Mr. Stockton walked aside and when Mr. Senior saw him beyond his reach he convinced the Officer of his Error who thereby was disappointed of his prey Being thus secured by the Providence of God through Faith and Prayer from the danger of Adversaries he thankfully acknowledged the whole glory thereof to God thus In reading 2 Chron. 20. 30. The Realm of Jehoshaphat was quiet for his God gave him rest round about God caused me to take notice that my living in rest and quietness being free from the molestation of my Enemies was the gift of God and came to pass by his Providence not from the privacy of the place where I lived or from the peaceable disposition of my Neighbours I was also instructed what I should return unto the Lord for keeping me from the
what great need I have and that it is of singular use to watch over my Soul in all its ways both in reference to sin that I fall not into it and when fallen what the Carriage and Actings of my Soul are at such a time Whether I flee for relief to God in Christ or to my own works And in reference to my duties to take heed lest those means which God hath appointed to be the conveyances of himself his Son and Spirit and all Spiritual blessings should prove to me a mean of Death and Separation from God by my formal use of them and resting in them For as Satan keeps some alienated from God by the gross pollutions of the world So others from Christ by their Establishing a Righteousness of their own O Lord break thou this snare for me and let my Soul escape as a bird from the Net that I may flee to thee and be at rest I have observed in my self that when God at any time is pleased to work any thing in my Soul I soon lose it if he quicken me I soon grow dead hearted again if he enliven my affections they soon grow cold and flat and my old hardness returns upon me Hence I come to see that it is infinite Wisdom and Goodness in God that he hath not put the stock of grace into our own hands but hath treasured it up in Christ that our life is now hid with Christ in God for so it becomes sure Rom. 4. 16. hereby also I come to see that I have need of continual recourse to Jesus Christ for new supplies of grace and strength The Lord God in his wisdom was pleased when he delivered his people out of Egypt before he brought them to Canaan to lead them 40 years in the wilderness when as he could have led them a nearer way to Canaan Exod. 13. 17. He chose rather to lead them through the great and terrible Wilderness Jer. 2. 6. where were fiery Serpents and Scorpions and drought where there was no water where he brought them forth water out of the Rock of Flint and fed them with Manna for this end that he might humble them prove them and do them good in the latter end Deut. 8. 15 16. Doest thou find it so O my Soul in thy travail towards the Heavenly Canaan Doest thou walk through much Spiritual drought a land of deserts and of the shadow of death Dost meet with a flinty heart and fiery temptations Know that the Lord doth this to humble thee which through his grace thou hast sometimes found and to prove thee i. e to discover thee to thy self for he himself knows thy thoughts afar off and this way of God through grace hath been a means of discovering much of thy corrupt heart to thee and that he may doe thee good in the latter end Therefore take heed O my Soul of Israel's sins of murmuring against God under thy wants of unbeleif and tempting God c. Read oft and weight well the 78th Psalm May 6. being Sabbath day The Lord was pleased in the hearing of his word to convince me of my sin and lost condition But Lord How unfaithful was I then and have I been since to the Convictions of thy Spirit How soon have I healed up the wound that was given by the word How soon hath an hard heart a secure careless Spirit taken possession of me Lord If ever thy word be effectual in me thou must not only speak it to my heart but write and engraff it there also Henceforth I desire to wait on thee as for the teachings of thy Spirit so for the writing of thy Law in my heart by thy Spirit I found a lothness in my Spirit to go to here this Sermon whereby I perceive Satan would have hindred me Be encouraged hence O my Soul to break through all difficulties thou meetest with in doing thy duty When thou findest any secret unwillingness to ordinances or duties then stir up thy self to wait upon God expecting that he hath some special mercy for thee which Satan would hinder thee off Jun. 1. This day the Lord did in the hearing of his word revive some convictions which have formerly been upon my Spirit though in a very languid manner I stood convinced before the Lord of unbelief and that I was a lost creature because thereof from the words of our Saviour Joh. 3. 18. He that believeth not is Condemned already Conscience tells me that I am yet in unbelief that I want that faith which is accompanied with the new birth Joh. 1. 12 13. that faith which should purge me from Atheism formality and resting in duties from hypocrisie and deadness from unclean affections and inordinate Love of the world from a vain mind and a light Spirit that faith which should purifie my heart from these and the like evils Act. 15. 9. that faith which should make Christ a greater Reality and more precious to me than any thing in the world 1 Pet. 2. 7. that faith which brings peace with God and joy in the Holy Ghost unspeakable and full of Glory Rom. 5. 1. 1 Pet. 1. 8. I find I have had a dead faith Jam. 2. 17 20. and presumed upon Gods Mercy in Christ although I have been estranged from God in my heart and Nature my Resting in duties and trusting in my own Righteousness as far as I can see hath been the deceit of my heart Lord lay this conviction upon my Conscience for I find my heart would put it off yea it hath already desperately hardned it self against thee I fear I shall out-grow this Conviction of thy word as at other times I feel a careless Spirit that would make light of Eternity and of Jesus Christ Lord break my heart under thy word for my unbelief and neglect of Christ Let me not heal my self but wait till thou shalt heal me Thou didst help the unbelief of thy Servant Thomas Oh that thou wouldest help mine also The Lord hath shewn me that I am dead in sin not only from the testimony of his word Eph. 2. 1. Col. 2. 13. but by inward experience For I feel my self alienated from the life of God cut off from communion with the Lord Jesus separate from God and his blessed Spirit My deceitful heart hath often gone about to repel this conviction and hath caused me sometimes to mistake a life of morality for Spiritual life and at other times a life of formality But now I find the Scripture speaks of dead works and calls for repentance from them Heb. 6. 1. and purging our consciences from them Heb. 9. 14. By dead works I understand not only the gross pollutions of the World but all works whatever that are done by a man void of the quickning Spirit of God Without Union to Christ there is no Spiritual life for as the natural life results from the Union of the Soul with the body and the State of death is nothing but the
met with in my course of private reading Ps 19. 13. Keep back thy servant from presumptuous sins let them not have dominion over me Where I considered 1. That David found in his heart a proness to presumptuous sins which made him cry out Keep back thy servant c. 2. He was not without fear or danger lest presumptuous sins should get the dominion over him for he Prays Let them not have dominion 3. When he found it thus with himself he calls himself Gods Servant Keep back thy servant This word coming when my heart had been upon the borders of a presumptuous sin did much affect me Febr. 6. Being a day of Humiliation I was much indisposed to the duties of the day I found my heart unfit to Pray in private and to perform Family exercise The sense of guilt had clouded and bowed down my Soul In the Evening God revived my Soul with Isa 64. 6 7 8. They complained they were all as an unclean thing their righteousness as filthy rags there was a flagging of the Spirit of prayer and this in a time of great Judgments as v. 10 11. Yet they say But now thou O Lord art our Father This suited my condition and encouraged me to believe my relation to God and his to me as my Father though I found my self under the foresaid Distempers I was also supported against my sins with 1 Joh. 2. 24. Let that abide in you which you have heard from the beginning if that which you have heard from the beginning shall remain in you ye shall continue in the Father and the Son By which I was encouraged to hold fast what Instructions Comforts and Supports I had formerly received from God That which ye have heard viz. from the teachings of the Spirit Joh. 6. 45. from the beginning viz. from the time they began to believe in Christ Heb. 3. 14. Nov. 28. 1669. Being Saturday I was visited with a Feaver When I was under the Visitation I looked over my Evidences for Heaven had comfortable hopes of my Salvation from several promises whereby the fear of Death was removed My Life was in hazard many Prayers were put up for me God directed to the timely use of proper means and gave his blessing and restored me to my work on the fourth Lords day as a return to Prayers In my sickness before the danger was probably past in the night season I had very clear and awful apprehensions of the Majesty of God as though I had heard God speaking to me out of Isa 57. 15. I who am the high and lofty one that inhabit Eternity c. and then methought it was said to me Surgite Ministri servi praedicate Evangelium ad Conversionem peccatorum Arise ye Ministers and Servants of God and Preach the Gospel for the Conversion of sinners And afterwards it was said to me You shall not die but live and declare the works of the Lord. Fear thou not thou hast born witness to my Name in this place thou shalt bear witness also to my Name where I shall call thee To which my Soul bowed down and I replied Lord I am willing to follow thee if thou shalt satisfie me that thou callest me I could not certainly tell whether I was awake or sleeping or slumbring but the matter being so affecting coherent and coming with some power I laid it up in my heart not knowing but it might be useful to me Jan. 30. 1671. My Treatise of Family Instruction being finished and Published I resolved after several times seeking God and Consulting with my own Soul to set upon composing a Treatise of glorifying God The grounds or reasons inducing me hereunto were 1. The Command given to all persons in all Nations to declare the glory of God 1 Chron. 16. 23 24. I saw here I might lawfully yea it was my duty to do what I could to set forth the glory of God And seeing I was taken off from my publick Preaching I might do it more beneficially by Writing and Printing 2. My Spirit hath been for several years put upon and stirred up to write on this Subject I made a little beginning in the year 1664. but laid it aside and in times of sickness I have found a lothness to die till that work were done and have met with many cross Providences as if sent with a tacit reproof for neglecting this work Now the stirring up the Spirit to a good work is of God and part of Gods call to the work Exod. 36. 2. Ezr. 1. 5. Hagg. 1. 14. 3. I was under many Engagements to glorifie God as 1 st The many and great mercies I have received for my Soul by the Teachings and Consolations of his Spirit and many outward mercies above my other Relations which are engagements to glorifie God Ps 86. 12 13. 2 ly The eminent deliverances I have had from sickness the Pestilence and other troubles Psal 50. 15. 3 ly The wonderful preservation I have had from mine Enemies notwithstanding all the hazards I have run of falling into their hands by Preaching the Gospel at home and abroad which should engage me to extol and glorifie God Psal 30. 1. 4. I did hope for benefit to my own Soul both by being further enlightened into the knowledge and excited to the practice of glorifying God while I was studying to instruct and excite others thereto July 17. 1672. God having opened a door for the free exercise of my Ministry by his Majesties most Gracious Declaration I was desired both at Ipswich and Colchester to Minister to them I had discouragements as from the uncertainty of the times not knowing whether this liberty would continue or a time of trouble and persecution arise the differences and animosities that are among Professors and the enmity that is on the part of the Adversaries I considered of it and had encouragement from the Word thereto as 1 Pet. 5. 2. 4. with vers 7. as also from Josh 1. 9. Joshua had difficult work before him potent Enemies that dwelt in fenced Cities the people with whom he had to do had so exasperated Moses his Spirit by their frequent murmurings that once he cried out to God to be killed out of hand that he might not see his own wretchedness Numb 11. 15. another time he spake so unadvisedly with his lips that he angred God and was shut out of Canaan Joshua might well fear when he was to enter on this work Therefore God speaks four times to him to encourage him Be strong be of good courage c. and gives him two Arguments to encourage him 1 st His Call Have not I Commanded thee 2 ly A promise of his Presence as his God Whence I Obs 1. God will be with his people in all places whithersoever they go 2. The promise of Gods presence may take off all fears arising either from the temper of the people with whom we shall have to do or the difficulty of our work or
and delusions that are in the hearts of sinners such instances would not be rare but it would be a wonder how any sinner could die in his sin and in his wits too from such a fear as this Believers are delivered Though they may and do experience some measure of fears yet God doth always support with some degree of hope that they let not go all their hold of the Covenant of God In a word Believers are so far victorious over the fear of death that if they understand their case aright they have no cause to be afraid of death when they are they are more afraid than hurt The Hornet having lost its sting may threaten with its humming noise but cannot prick the flesh so death where sin is pardoned which is itssting may afright with its horrid aspect but cannot hurt 3. Death is overcome to Believers in that it cannot hold them by its power It is indeed the unalterable Law of Heaven that all must die And accordingly Abraham Isaac and Jacob and all the Patriarchs Moses and Samuel and Isaiah and all the Prophets Peter and James and John and all the Apostles yea all the Saints from Adam to this generation are fallen asleep and shut up in their Graves But shall the Grave always contain them Are they there kept in an everlasting Prison under locks and bars that cannot be opened Did making the Sepulchre sure Sealing the stone and setting a Watch forbid Christs Resurrection No surely I went down saith Jonah a Type of the Resurrection to the bottoms of the Mountains the Earth with her bars was about me for ever yet hast thou brought up my life from corruption O Lord my God Jon. 2. 6. And though after my skin worms destroy this body yet in my flesh shall I see God whom I shall see for my self and mine eyes shall behold and not another though my reins be consumed within me saith Job ch 19. 26 27. Though the Saints be descended to the depths of the sea and hid in the bowels of the Earth and their bodies resolved into the farthest dust and that dust dispersed to the four Winds yet shall they be recovered and rise again The Sea shall not contain the dead that are in it nor the Graves the dead that are in them Their scattered atoms shall be recollected and reared up again to a goodly body Behold there shall be a shaking and their dry bones shall come together bone to his bone and lo the sinews and the flesh shall come up upon them and the skin shall cover them above And thus shall the Lord God say Come from the four Winds O breath and breath upon these slain that they may live and the breath shall come into them and they shall live and stand up upon their feet Ezek. 37. 7 8 10. This is it which the Apostle asserts here throughout the Chapter concluding that then shall be brought to pass the saying that is written Death is swallowed up in victory Object But what more victory is this than what unbelievers shall have for they also shall rise again Answ Yes it is more beyond all comparison Joh. 5. 28 29. All that are in the graves shall hear his voice and shall come forth they that have done good unto the Resurrection of life and they that have done evil to the Resurrection of damnation The wicked shall rise but from death Temporal to death Eternal to die the second death This is Death's Victory over them The Godly shall rise from Death temporal to Life eternal to die no more This is the Saints Victory over Death 4. Death is so overcome to Believers as to be made serviceable and advantageous to them And this is the fulness and perfection of Victory when the Enemy is brought in Subjection to serve the Conquerour The Apostle in this Epistle reckons Death to be part of the Saints Inventory ch 3. 21 22. All things are yours whether Paul or Apollos or Life or Death And elsewhere he calleth it gain Phil. 1. 21. to die is gain What gain Answ 1. In reference to the present state Death is 1 st The end of Sin With the body of Flesh the body of Sin is also put off from which St. Paul longed to be delivered Rom. 7. 24. Here the best of Saints have their corruptions infirmities imperfections but at Death the Spirits of just men are made perfect Heb. 12. 23. 2 ly The end of all Sorrows There are no Pains or Diseases or Griefs or Losses or Crosses or Persecutions in the Grave Job 3. 17 18 19. There the wicked cease from troubling and there the weary be at rest There the Prisoners rest together they hear not the voice of the Oppressor The small and great are there and the Servant is free from his Master 3. Rest from Labours It is no light burden of works that is upon a Christians hand no small labour to discharge the duties of his general and particular Calling What saith the Scripture Labour work watch run strive wrastle fight give diligence endure hardness press forward c. But blessed are the dead that die in the Lord for they rest from their labours Rev. 14. 13. The day of the Saints Death is his happy Jubilee when he is set at liberty and goeth out free from his Service Thus is Death gain in reference to the presence state 2. In reference to the future state for 1 st As for the Soul it being released from the body is admitted into the Heavenly Jerusalem to an innumerable company of Angels to the Spirits of just men made perfect and to Jesus the Mediator of the New Covenant Heb. 12. This day saith Christ to a dying Saint shalt thou be with me in Paradise Luk. 23. 43. St. Paul desires to depart that he might be with Christ which is far better Phil. 1. 23. 2 ly As for the body Death serves to refine it for 1 Cor. 15. 50. This I say that Flesh and Blood cannot inherit the Kingdom of God neither doth corruption inherit incorruption These bodies which we now carry are so gross and corruptible they are not meet for an heavenly state They die that they may be changed Phil. 3. 21. They are sown in corruption to be raised in incorruption sown in dishonour to be raised in Glory sown in weakness to be raised in power sown Natural bodies to be raised Spiritual The old decayed house is taken down to be built anew and these weak crasie bodies are laid in the Earth to rise afresh This corruptible is corrupted that it may put on incorruption and this Mortal dieth that it may put on Immortality Thus is this Enemy overcome and made to serve as a mean and advantage to the Believers happiness This indeed is a glorious Victory over a very mighty and formidable Enemy So great and wonderful that it far exceeds the hope of Nature Flesh and Blood cannot believe the report thereof Paul's discourse of the Resurrection