this exercise is a thing of greater difficulty to me than such easie Undertakers are aware of and really to perform all the Duties I am to enquire into in a manner well-pleasing to our heavenly Father will cost them and us all more pains than only to read or preach an hour or two upon them which yet might lead into many important concerns of government and obedience Believe it herein we have all need enough of serious and frequent teacbing again and again (a) Heb. 5.12 for our conduct in the Relations whereunto God hath cast us In order then both to my preaching at present and all our future practice as a ground for the Resolution of this Question Question What are the Duties of Parents and Children and how are they to be managed according to Scripture I am directed to the words read Wherein we have the mutual offices of Children and Parents required and virtually at least prescribed with annexed reasons to enforce them severally upon each Relatives which afford this Proposition That God's pleasure and Childrens encouragement should move Christian Children to obedience and Parents to a moderate government in all things Here is a large theme but I shall endeavour as nigh as I can to speak much in a little hoping I shall obtain your pardon though I let slip some considerable Particulars if by some general anticipations and cautions I do in a Sermon decline those numerous special Cases which in a larger Treatise on this Subject might fairly step in and lay claim to some special satisfaction It were an excursion for me now to speak of Children and Parents in any other than the most famous signification * Analogum per se positam stat pro famostore analogato of the words taken not figuratively but properly not for those in a political but natural Relation yet as under the Christian Institution vvhere vve are ever to have regard to our blessed Lord and Master Indeed Children comprehend both sons and daughters 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Gen 46 29. the fruit of the body not excluding grand-children of what age or quality soever as indissolubly bound in duty to those who begot and brought them forth of both sexes Father and Mother the Parents of their flesh (b) Heb. 12.9 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Prov. 23.22 from whom they were originally derived And that the Apostle doth here direct the command to Inferiors before Superiors as in the 18. verse and elsewhere (c) Eph 5.22 6.1 5. to Children before Parents is not that Children and their duties are first in order of nature or time for there are offices of inbred parental love and care before they can be known or observ'd by children 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 but writing chiefly to children come to the use of reason he begins with them who are subject and ought first to perform duty The anticipation of time here connoting the honour due to Superiors he doth in the first place put those in mind of their duty who are to obey as usually more defective rather than those that have authority over them in this oeconomical conjunction Either in that this office of obedience is less easie and pleasing to our nature than that of parental love which is allur'd to exert it self readily by the right discharge of the former or in that the subjection of children is the foundation on which the good government of Parents doth depend and a means to make themselves ready for that authority which else they will be unfit for as Antoninus lays down the axiom which many of the moralists used viz. You cannot well govern others unless first governed * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 For my method then in answering the complicated enquiry before me whiles I follow the Apostle in my Text I shall need no Apology to insist on I. The Duty of Children with the extent thereof urged from that which is most cogent to perswade to it and disswade from the neglect of it II. The Office of Parents enforc'd from the special consideration of that the Apostle suggests to move to it III. The manner and means of managing both offices or discharging both duties more generally and particularly according to the mind of God in his word The two former may be look'd upon as the explication of my Text and Proposition and an exhortation press'd with reasons or motives to the Duties and the last as Directions to perform them I. The Duty of Children with the extent thereof urged from that which is most cogent to perswade to it and disswade from the neglect of it This is express'd and imply'd in the former of the verses I have read to you wherein we have three Particulars to be spoken to 1. The Duty 2. Extent or latitude of it 3. Motive to it 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 1. The Duty of Children from the precept Children obey your Parents The word imports an humble subjection to their authority and government with a ready performance of what they require it being an explanation of that which in the law is engrav'd with God's own hand honour (d) Exod. 20.12 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 importing how highly they are to be valued and not lightly esteemed In another place it is ye shall fear every man his mother and his father (e) Lev. 19.3 with 14. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 awful fear being no other than a deep veneration both which are to be fairly read in the acts of genuine obedience for that doth flow forth from a compound disposition of love and fear mixed in an ingenuous child who is readily mov'd to obey in contemplation of that authority and affection implanted in the Parent towards it To speak more distinctly this obedience to Parents may contain in it these four things 1. Reverence 2. Obedience 3. Pious regards 4. Submission The three first of these may be reducible to active and the last to passive obedience 1. Reverence which is a due and awful estimation of their persons as to this relation placed in eminencie above their children to acknowledg them from God himself the Supreme Parent of us all (f) Acts 17.28 the authors preservers and governors of their lives and upon that account to honour them in their hearts speeches and behaviours from an honest desire to please and filial fear to offend them whose children they are of what rank soever they now appear in the world and therefore to comport themselves so in all the actions of their lives before God and men that they render themselves acceptable to their Parents Yea to both of them the law requires reverence to the Mother as well as the Father (g) Levit. 19.3 with 30. the word which is in one verse fear is in another translated reverence to the claim of which the Mother there seems to be favour'd with some kind of priority because Children who have most needed their Mothers in their tender
years are apt many times to despise them as more subject to infirmities and as looking for less of respect from their hands So that really to give them honour is a fuller evidence of cordial performance The Lord is pleas'd to begin there where the duty is most tried Reverence thy Mother and thy Father de leg l. 4. Ethic. l. 9. l. 2. Spizel de re literar Sineas p. 243. Both are to be had in a just veneration Plato and Aristotle could by Nature's light teach thus 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 This as the prime law of Nature the Spartans and generally all Nations of old did and Chinoises at this day do maintain with admirable care Now doing reverence to the Fathers of our flesh (h) Heb. 9.12 in Scripture may comprehend what Children owe to their Parents both with reference to their speech and behaviour 1 With respect to their speech that it be seasonable and agreeable to the relation grac'd with humility (i) 1 Pet. 5.5 and modesty in all converse with them in presence and discourse of them in absence They should give them honourable titles as that of Father and Mother do connote dignity (k) Jer. 31.9 Gal. 4.6 and so Sir or Lord (l) Mat. 21.30 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 thus we have good Children in the Book of God saluting their Parents as Isaac his Father Abraham (m) Gen. 22.11 Jacob Isaac (n) 17.18 David Saul his Father in law (o) 1 Sam. 24.28 Solomon Bathsheba my Mother (p) 1 King 2.20 21. Rachel Laban making her Apology My Lord (q) Gen. 31.35 David again Saul (r) 1 Sam. 26.18 and that with all meekness at a sit season in a few words with freedom and readiness (s) Gen. 22 7. 27.12 giving pleasing answers when spoken to in a becoming civility (t) 1 Sam. 12.4 6.18 waiting with contentment to hear them speak first (u) Prov 4.1 laying their hands on their mouths and refraining to talk in their presence without just occasion (w) Job 29.9 10 21. 32.5 6. And in their absence by speaking so of them amongst those they do converse that by the commendable reports they make of them or prudent apologies for them it may be understood what venerable respects they have for their Parents Thus 't is said of the Children of the prudent Mother they rise up as those who speak pathetically and call her blessed (x) Prov. 31.28 in that laudable discourse they have of her Hereby Children will prove themselves to be of a vertuous temper and not like that elder brother of the penitent Prodigal who spake undecently in a surly manner to his Father (y) Luk. 15 29 30. and sometime some of Jacob's sons to theirs (z) Gen. 34.31 and such like who by their rude and malapert prating disparage and aggrieve their parents (a) 26.35 27.46 Yet of a more untoward generation are they whom the Wiseman took notice of that curse their Father and do not bless their Mother but saith he their lamp shall go out in obscurity (b) Prov. 20.20 Neither can there be a better end of those who are under the Almighty's curse devoted to death (c) Lev. 20.9 Exod. 21.17 neither can they who do any way set light by their Father or Mother avoid a much easier censure (d) Deut. 27 16 Lib. 44. de Rep. sith by interpretation it is a dishonour to God himself Plato in his Commonwealth orders that Children should in their words through their whole life revere their Parents there being a great punishment imminent for light and idle discourse Further 2 The hehaviour and carriage of Children should ever be significative and expressive of reverence to their Parents in all their addresses the countenance so composed in their presence as may argue awfulness and respect the deportment lowly rising up before those they honour for relation as well as those venerable for age (e) Lev. 19.32 and at meeting thus Solomon though a King did to his Mother Bathsheba (f) 1 Kings 2.19 hasting to attend them in a lowly posture thus Joseph who liv'd as a Prince made ready to meet and presented himself to his Father whom he had maintained (g) Gen. 46.29 so Achsah Caleb's daughter who was married to her Cousin German when she addressed her self to her Father she alighted from her beast before she spoke to him (h) Judg. 1 14.5◠and again Joseph thought it no disparagement to prostrate himself to his aged father Jacob whose eyes were then dim that he could not see his behaviour when he also gave his own Children an example in praying for his Father's blessing (i) Gen. 43.12 which Esau though he came tardè did passionately beg for (k) 27.19 34. And though Parents now have not a Prophetick spirit as the Patriarch's had yet it seems still very equitable that Christian Children considering their Parents Superiority in the Lord should frequently upon occasion in an (l) Heb. 7 7. Mar. 10.17 humble manner crave their Parents prayers for God's blessing The rude and haughty looks which are in many Children before their Parents cannot comport with this duty which discards a dogged and supercilious countenance that betokens scorn and derision opposite to this filial reverence The Wise man makes a smart remark upon such odious insolent behaviour which might deter any of understanding from it when he saith (m) Prov. 30.17 The eye that mocketh his Father and despiseth to obey his Mother the Ravens of the Valley shall pick it out and the young Eagles shall eat it Here is a signal retaliation to those who in speech or behaviour deride the persons or despise the counsels of their Parents whether yet alive or deceased 'T were to be wish'd it had been better studied by some Children in this Generation I mean some late and present Preachers of our Age who do not parentare manibus but indeed upbraid the Ghosts of their reverend and pious Parents who warmly argued the necessity of regeneration either by reckoning them amongst the herd of Divines or with an harangue of lame sequels perch up to vent their callow notions and bespatter their own nest in complacence with the lax humour of the times when many for the bags cry Hail Master but betray the Son of Man with a kiss (n) Mat. 26.49 wic Luk. 22.48 yet I would hope there are but a few of this feather I proceed to mind Children of another duty and that is 2. Observance whereby their Parents pleasure with fit subjection is perform'd out of a real desire to promote their honour vvhich is more than in countenance and ceremonies to express obedience (o) Mat. 21.30 It is very requisite Christian Children should with an heedful circumspection observe the holy and wise prescripts and practices of their Parents by acknowledging subjection to their government Our blessed Lord himself set a
pattern herein for he went down with his Mother and her Husband and came to Nazareth and was subject to them (p) Luk. 2.51 Mar 6.3 Mat 13.55 Joâ— 6.42 Quis quibus Deus hominibus c. saith Bernard * Homil 1. Super missus est He to whom Angels are subject whom Principalities and Powers do obey was observant of his Mother Mary and her espoused Husband Joseph yea most likely in the business of Joseph's calling More particularly this filial observance shews it self in 1. Attending to their instructions 2. Executing their commands 3. Depending on their counsels And 4. Following their examples 1. We ought to attend seriously to our Parents instructions and learn what they teach us for good receiving their djctates with humility and laying them up in our hearts those especially of spiritual advantage out of a love to wisdom and our Parents joys (q) Prov. 29.3 〈◊〉 Solomon bids from his own experience My Son hear the instruction of thy father and forsake not the law of thy mother (r) 1.10 Again Hearken unto thy father which begat thee and despise not thy mother when she is old And then that Daughters might not think themselves exempted Hearken ye Children to the instruction of a father and attend to know understanding and good doctrine (Å¿) 4.1 2 3. which if heedfully observ'd makes a wise child when the contrary bewrays folly (t) 13.1 which is a grief and discouragement to the father as was that of Eli's Sons (u) 1 Sam. 2-25 and Lot's Sons in law (w) Gen. 19.14 who sleighted their fathers documents as the Prodigal also did his before he felt the smart of it and came to his wits again (x) Luk. 15.2.13 17. Yet this is dissonant to the voice of Nature which hath taught the very Chickens to hearken unto the clocking of the Hen hath been ever distastful to the wiser Heathens and would bring a disparagement upon the Christian institution So that Christian Children should be very heedful of their Parents teachings especially in the concerns of their souls Hence 2. Children should execute their Parents commands and dispatch readily what they order them to do without whartling disputes this is the most special duty required in my Text the extent of it will come under consideration anon They should be as those under the Centurions authority go and come and do at his command (y) Mat. 8 9. Samuel came at the supposed call of his pro-pro-Parent once and again (z) 1 Sam. 3.5 c. David when his Father Jesse had sent for him out of the field e're he knew what it was for (a) 16.12 and so went as he commanded him (b) 17.17 20. So Jacob when Isaac sent him (c) Gen. 28.5 and Joseph when Jacob sent him (d) 37.14 yea the other ten Sons also upon their Fathers order (e) 42.2 3. Isaac attended in carrying the wood when the servants were free from the burden at his Father's pleasure (f) 22 6. Joseph and the Rechabites are famous instances of observing faithfully the charge of their Parents even when they were dead and gone (g) 50.20 Jer â—5 8 c. out of conscience in a respectful manner with reference to the divine authority Abraham's Children walked in the way of the Lord as their Father commanded them (h) Gen. 8.9 Solomon did not only command his own Son (i) Prov. 6 1â— though he prov'd disobedient but he observ'd his Father David's charge to walk in the Lord's statutes (k) 1 King 2.3 and â— 3. though drawn aside after with temptations and to build the Temple (l) 1 Câ—ro 2â— 11 2 Chron 5 and 6. God takes it for granted a good Child will serve his Father (m) Mal. 3 17. yea and when put to pain in things not only necessary but of no reputation supposing in things purely indifferent both in their nature and use their Parents to be more judicious to determine what is expedient and decent yet not without the use of their own discerning faculty nor without any examination in a blind irrational obsequâ—ousness (n) Prâ—v 14.15 Ne pâ—câ—uâ— ritis sâ—quâ—mur amecedentiam grâ—â—em pâ—â—â—nâ—â—s nonqua 〈◊〉 eâ—â— seâ— qua â—â—r Senec. like the brutish obedience of the Jesuits Novicâ—s For though I should grant that Parents have in some sort a power over the consciences of their Children whiles they are as in God's stead (o) 1 Sam 2.30 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 swaying their apprehentions in their tenderest years before they come to the use of their ripened reason yet when there is a judgment of discerning betwixt good and evil their obedience ought to be reas â—â—blâ— such as God requires to his own service 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 such as is according to his Word not merely childish though the obedience of Children but acceptable * Rom. 12.1 and well-pleasing unto him as in my Text and in the fear of God vers 22. Again 3. Children ought to depend upon their Parents counsels and take their good and wholsom advice giving them the honour of being in an ordinary course more prudent and sagacious than themselves as having greater experience ability and a call to govern in affairs of importance For to disregard them herein were to slight the paternal authority which God would have kept in reputation He was a Prodigal who would not be advised till he was bitten with the ill effect of that extravagant course which grieved his Father (p) Luk. 15.12 13. but the docible Child who is righteous and wise rejoyceth the heart of both his Parents (q) Pro 23.22 24. 15.20 Here I might enter on particulars to shew that Children have no power being under government to dispose of their Parents goods without their advice or allowance (r) Gal. 4.1 2. with Gen. 31.36 37 with 19. 32.10 Prov 28.24 19 26. for faultiness here is aggravated by the relation nor to choose their company disagreeable to their Parents minds (s) 1.10 15. 1 Cor 5.9 but to take their advice and be content with that sutable dress their Parents do order them to appear in (t) Gen. 27.15 37.3 2 Sam. 13 8. and not in strange apparel * Zeph 1.8 But I shall only suggest two more eminent instances wherein Children are more especially to consult their Parents and observe their advice viz. as to a particular Calling and Marriage 1 'T is fit to he advised by Parents in the choice of a Calling or lasting course of life Jacob and David mov'd and liv'd according to their Parents disposal (†) Gen. 28.2 1 Sam. 16.11 19. 17.17 as was hinted before and so did Jonadab's Children (‖) Jer. 35.6 7. It being unfit they should carve for themselves without leave but follow the parental conduct unless that leads them into an unlawful Calling The pretension of Religion in a Monastick life which the Papists urge
and imitate whatsoever is good commendable and vertuous in our Parents This the Wise man gave his Son in charge that he should with all his heart set his eyes to observe his wayes (i) Prov. 23.26 i. e. take him for his pattern in all those practises which were consonant to the pleasure of his Heavenly Father we should follow them as they do our Lord and Master (k) 1 Cor. 11.1 But not in their errors and miscarriages for fear of Jeroboam's dreadful entail which some choose rather than leave the crooked paths of their Progenitors (l) 1 King 22.58 2 Kings 3.3 2 Chron. 22.4 as the idolatrous Jews of old (m) Jer. 44.17 and the Papists at this day For Marc Antonine the Emperour as the learned Gataker expounds him * Mr Anton. l. 4. Sect. 46. id quod Origen adv Cels. l. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 could teach us that we should not be so childish as to do any thing without consideration 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 upon the mere account of tradition as we had it from our Parents When Frederick IV. Elector Palatine of the Rhine was by a certain Prince advised to follow the example of his Father Lewis he answered well †In Religione non parenâ—um non majorum exempla sequendo sed tantum voluntatem Dei In the business of Religion we must not follow the examples of Parents and Ancestors but only as they are agreeable to the will of God God himself stated this case to the Jewish Children in the wilderness by the Prophet Ezekiel (n) Ezek. 20.18 19. and the Apostle Peter sheweth Christian Children should behave themselves as those who are redeemed from a vain conversation (o) 1 Pet. 1.18 But the good carriage of Parents in their piety towards God righteousness and charity towards man should have a great influence upon those that descend from them Solomon is commended for his dutifulness so far as he walked in the good wayes of David his Father (p) 1 Kings 3.3 expressing the like good qualities and actions in that which was right (q) 2 Kings 23.2 and so Asa (r) 1 Kings 15.11 raising up monuments of David's piety honesty and vertue 'T is reported Justin Martyr became Christian by following the good examples of the primitive Fathers †Euseb l. 4. c. 4. The famous Emperour but now praised determined when in the Empire not to follow the Caesarian mode which then obtain'd at the imperial Court but to do all 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 as a disciple of pious Antonine * Gatak in lib. 4. Sect. 30. to be dress'd by his Fathers glass as Julius Capitolinus notes to act and speak and think as his Father did or as he tells us himself to imitate his constant tenour in things well managed his evenness of temper in all things the chearfulness of his countenance his courteousness contempt of vain-glory and studiousness to find out things He had set before himself the virtues of both his Parents and Pro-parents yea his adoptive Father and copied out the most singular things in them all ‖ l. 1. c. 1. Sect. 1. 2 16. Which may the more incite us Christians as Paul did Timothy from the remembrance of the Faith in his Grand-mother Lois and Mother Eunice (s) 2 Tim. 1.5 to learn that Parents good actions should make impressions on their Children as the Seal upon the wax that they may represent them both while living and dead These cannot be a better resemblance of a Child to a good Father than in this observance (t) Prov. 27.11 which I have touch'd on in these four Particulars hastning to the next Duty viz. 3 Pious regards Christian Children owe their Parents both in respect of their benevolence and indigence from a real desire of humble thankfulness if it were possible to make some kind of compensation unto them by whom under God they subsist 1. With respect to their benevolence a grateful resentment of their kindnesses which ought to be manifested in an affectionate acknowledgment of their Parental love and care This is so good and acceptable unto God that to requite our Parents in Paul's language is to shew piety and kindness at home (u) 1 Tim. 5.4 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 when by way of commutation we are solicitous to take our turn as it were in a sort of retaliation to make some kind of retribution to those who begat us either immediately or mediately This ingenuous skill the Apostle would have learn'd as a commendable Christian Art by an exercise in such grateful offices as may prove Children do delight to be much in those services (w) Mal. 3 17. with Phil. 2.22 which express the esteem they have of their Parents good will to them Hence we should with great complacence entertain all our Parens favours as ingenuous Servants waiting to express the sense of our love readily and heartily (x) Eph. 6.7 Col. 3.23 sith our most pathetick acknowledgments of Parental love and care are but easie returns for their unvaluable kindnesses so that without this resentment Children cannot indeed be pious For as Cicero †C m omnibus virtutibus me affectum esse cupiam tum nihil est quod malim c. Quid est pietas nisi voluntas grata in parentes c. pro Cn. Plancio in an Oration argues When I shall desire that I may be affected with all the vertues then there is nothing I more wish than that I may be thankful and seem to be so for this one vertue is not only the greatest but the mother of all the rest What is Piety but a grateful will towards our Parents c. who of us saith he is liberally educated but thinks of our Educators c. with a thankful remembrance which may be by treasuring up their good speeches and wise sayings of remark (y) Job 15.18 Psal 44.1 2. 78.3 rehearsing with delight their praise-worthy acts (z) Prov. 31.28 expounding all they do candidly as Ruth did Naomi's carriage honouring all that was honourable in her choosing her Religion and admiring all her vertues Thy God shall be my God said she and thy people my people (a) Ruth 1.16 comforting them under every Providence (b) 4 15. Gen 5.29 and providing as much as may be for them (c) Jos 2.13 Hence 2. with respect to their indigence be it what it will either in regard to internal or external defects natural moral or providential both living and dead Children are to shew themselves concern'd by covering or bearing their infirmities supplying their necessities defending their persons and honour against the rude and injurious attaques of those who vvould disparage and defame them Noah and Lot Isaac and Jacob had their infirmities under temptations and their Children covered them (d) Gen. 9.21 23. 27.12 28.5 37.10 so did Jonathan his Father Saul's (e) 1 Sam. 31.2 Mary was
promise of life annexed (y) Eph. 6.2 as was hinted above which must needs contain some peculiar benefit which God doth graciously confer to shew what an estimate he hath of childrens obedience that the use of a comfortable life should be lengthen'd out to them who according to godliness give due honour to them who are under him the authors of their lives So for the most part and when 't is otherwise that good children do early depart hence being sooner ripe they do enter into a better life Besides we are not to take our measures of a long life in this state ‖ Bod. in Eph. from the course of times or decrepit age but partly from the manner of living and divine good things received in life and partly from attaining the end of it As if one in three months pass over as much way as another in three years and come to the same mark with him length is to be reckon'd from the travelling rather than the way and he is long-liv'd to whom God by revealing his end hath brought nigh to himself As David at seventy was said to die in good old age (z) 1 Chron. 29.28 Psal 90.10 as well as Isaac who had liv'd an hundred and eighty There is as much perfection in a little circle as a larger in David's seventy as Lamech's seven hundred seventy seven years (a) Gen. 5.31 'T is not so much from the number of days but the filling them up that life is to be reckon'd long (b) Job 5.26 Isa 65.20 Luke 2.25 30. Sat vixit diu quem nec pudet vixisse nec piget mo i. Truly obedient children have this benefit of the promise that as they say of Figs and Lemmons they ne'r die before they are ripe for salvation Whereas the disobedient are in a sense dead though they stay long here they may be reckon'd short-liv'd when they do not answer the end of living If Christian Children would but seriously contemplate these things and allow God a reserve by Prerogative-royal in the performance of temporal promises and then heedfully observe the different practices and issues of other children in divine and humane story take often into consideration the instances of both sorts and mark the ends of each as Shem Abraham Isaac Jacob Joseph yea above all the blessed Jesus himself and on the contrary of Cham Absolom Adonijah c. they would find it a good means to perform their duties acceptably and as he said * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 live perfecting all offices 2. Remove all the tendencies to the dishonour of Parents and set a value upon their instructions 'T is good to be circumspect and banish those inordinate affections which alienate the heart from duty as self-conceitedness in Absolom and the Prodigal the one thought he could sway the Scepter (c) 2 Sam. 15.3 7. and the other manage his Portion better than his Father (d) Luke 15.12 13. so likewise high thoughts of merit which the Prodigals elder Brother had (e) 29 30. also ambition which did so swell Adonijah †1 Kings 1.5 6. and curiosity as in Solomon's young man who follow'd the sight of his eyes (f) Eccles 9.11 Hence Children should take heed of associating with misguiding and misleading companions (g) Prov. 19.27 13.20 and be afraid of whisperers who secretly suggest things which may tend to make Parents cheap (h) Gen. 9.23 24. Shem and Japhet would not listen unto Cham's tale in their ears nor see too narrowly into their Father's failings lest this should cause a dis-esteem Whereas Children should appretiate their Parents respects be afraid of their reproofs and set an high rate upon their good advice (i) Prov 4.3 4. Psal 37.30 when it 's right it is then to be valued otherwise it should not be approv'd (k) 49.13 Jer. 7.18 Ezek. 18.14 no more than Terah's Idol-worship was by his Son Abraham when called (l) Joh. 24.2 Certainly Ahaziah sinned greatly and so did the Daughter of Herodias in following their Mother's counsel (m) 2 Chron. 22.3 Mat. 14.8 for if it be evil the circumstances may be such that obedient children must testifie against it as Asa and Levi did (n) 1 Kings 15.13 Deut. 33.9 yea disclose the wickedness of it as Jonathan and Michal commendably did (o) 1 Sam. 20.3 4. 19.11 12. but yet in such a case it should if possible be with so much caution as may prove there is no sleighting of the Relation but a desire to keep up the honour of that by an hearty sorrow for the failure The Stoicks used to say that a wise man would make it his business to perform all things rightly even to the putting forth of the finger * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Stob. Ni tibi concessit ratio digitum exere peccas Pers Sat. 5. Be sure Christians should be careful that they do not so much as by an unwarrantable motion of that disparage their Parents or despise those chosen by them to give instructions 3. Perform all with sincerity and equality or impartiality to both Parents As the great requisite to the due management of these duties Solomon saith (p) Prov. 23.26 My son give me thine heart and let thine eyes observe my ways He would not have him look asquint or come with by ends in a feigned observance as Absolom (q) 2 Sam. 14.32 15.7 10. or not real only verbal like him in the Gospel who pretended to go and went not (r) Mat. 21.28 30. his obedience ended in a complement and no more But if Servants are to do their duties heartily in absence and presence as unto the Lord and not unto men in the Verse following my Text then much more are Children who likewise are greatly concern'd to behave themselves impartially with equal respects to both Parents as well as cordially (s) Phil. 2.22 The Law mentions Father and Mother expresly which might have been included in one word Parent and Jacob is commended upon record for his obedience to his Father and Mother (t) Gen. 28.7 Solomon many times in the Proverbs calls for obedience to both Whatever inequality may be betwixt a man and his wife who is oblig'd to be subject to her husband yet in relation to their children they are both as one and deserve equal honour Indeed if in a purely indifferent thing they differ in their peremptory commands which are contrary then the Fathers is to have the precedency yet with a very great respect to the Mother when in that instant the child is necessitated to decline hers though if the Father's command were unlawful and the Mother's lawful then the Mother were to be obey'd (u) Lev. 19.3 but with hearty sorrow the Father should require what God dis-allows and he for that reason doth modestly refuse And this sincere obedience is to be given to both whether rich or poor in the world whether good and gentle
a time (q) Mark 6.20 to gain honour and respect from him And Solomon saith A gracious woman retaineth honour (r) Prov. 11.16 and a gracious man too both of them in the Relation of Parents where debauchery though never so secret and blanch'd with subtilty but discern'd by nearest Relations proves as poison to the souls of their children teaching them only with a fair outside to imitate a politick Religion which hath no spirit in it but is flat and insipid such as God will not relish Whereas real and internal godliness truly exercis'd by Parents doth greatly quicken their children and powerfully help both Parents and Children in all relative duties which by their means will not be grievous but delightful But if Parents be insincere and have not their hearts right with God and carry not themselves blamelesly having blots in their own conversation they will find the duties I have been speaking of to be very difficult and insuccessful as we may learn from the Apologue of the Mother Crab †Cum dixisset Mater indecens esse non recta via incedere sed obliquos intorquere gressus faciam inquit ille mea Mater si te idem fâ—cientem prius videro who had her Son go streight forward sith it was indecent to crawl sideling awry and backwards who answer'd I will do it Mother if I shall first see you your self doing so before me Unholy Parents do indeed by their unholiness contradict that hearty reverence they require from their Children and render the means of their education unprofitable Those Parents who would prosper in their conduct should like that worthy Bishop of Antioch * Theod. III. 6. by a good conversation commend their instructions 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 teaching with words and confirming the words with an holy life They themselves should as the Elders said to Boaz (s) Ruth 4.11 do worthily in Ephrata and be famous in Bethlehem put iniquity far from their hands and let it not dwell in their tabernacle (t) Job 11.14 lest notwithstanding they otherwise be at pains for the education and maintenance of their Children the Lord shall have no joy in them (u) Isa 9.13 17. and never suffer them to be removed (w) 14.20 And as you are to put away all iniquity so particularly that of flattery to friends lest the eyes of your Children should fail (x) Job 17.5 Vbi ubi fueri vive Deo qui esi Dator vitae tuae vive conscientiae quae est vita vitae tuae vive famae quae est vita post vitam tuam Be perswaded then Cristian Parents to take his advice who said Where wheresoever thou shalt be live to God who is the donor of thy life Live to thy Conscience which is the life of thy life Live to thy good Name which is a life after this life and then I may add will flourish most in thy Posterity 2. Maintain your parental authority and assert the dignity of your Relation yet not with lordly rigour but still with love and mildness 'T is good not to lose the power God hath given you in superiority over your Children through any neglect of using it or by making your self cheap in any unbecoming familiarity but then take care that you exercise it in equity with all gentleness and gravity Let none despise you (y) Tit. 2.15 Thus Abraham being in God's stead he would command for God and he is commended for it (z) Gen. 18.19 with 14.23 24. as we have heard If a Father's honour belong to you you should not suffer it to be trampled upon or lightly esteem'd (a) Deut. 32.46 1 Sam. 2.30 If you let go the reins of your Government you cannot rule well when the Master of the Ship le ts go the helm his Vessel is driven before the wind and tide Those Parents who live according to the former direction will be the better able to observe this For justice and holiness are venerable both in man and woman as was noted there (b) Mark 6 20. Prov. 11.16 These will gain respects to persons in a Family though they have not authority to restrain others from evil keep them in a kind of awe and gain at least a formal approbation of vertuous actions much more when they are eminent in those vested with Authority as Parents are who as an holy man ‖ Mr. Baxter in his Cases l. 543. lately directed should take care their Children be neither too bold with them nor yet too strange or fearful They are not to be treated as servants but as the fruits of your own bodies Too much familiarity will over-embolden them and too little countenance will discourage them Endeavour to attain the good skill of upholding and using well the preheminence of your station and relation Some Parents do not only abuse their authority in putting their Children upon things unlawful as Laban (c) Gen. 29.23 Saul (d) 1 Sam 25.44 Herodias (e) Mat. 14 8. but also by their own disobedience to God and their sinful indulgence (f) 2 Sam. 12.9 13.19 Sam. 29 30. David himself it seems under a temptation did disparage himself and lessen his own authority which gave occasion to his son Absolom's rebellion against him A vertuous management of power with an unaffected amiable gravity is necessary to keep a Superiour from being sleighted In commanding of vertue and restraining of vice in your Children you are concern'd to see your pleasure be executed but then your injunctions must be founded in love and design'd for good Hence you are oblig'd as Salvian * Regimen esse non potest nisi fuerit jugiter in Rectore judicium De Gubern Dei l. 1. hath determined to see that what you resolve upon be with judgment and good discretion as you expect good success When your orders are thus circumstantiated you will do well to see them performed and not to connive at your Childrens disobedience nor to please their peccant humour lest saith Euripides †〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 you afterwards weep when it is too late 3. Sweeten all with pathetick expressions of endearing kindness to insinuate the more into their affections but still with Christian prudence this will make your government much more easie and acceptable Solomon gives us an account of the affectionateness of his Father and the tenderness of his Mother to him when engaging him to duty (g) Prov. 4.3 4. 31.1 2 3. Bathsheba useth an abrupt kind of speech which importeth abundance of affection What my son and what the son of my womb and what the son of my vowes implying more of kindness than she was able to express to stir him up as one whom his Mother comforteth (h) Isaiah 66.13 Nothing doth more chear up and is more sweet and pleasing to Children than the due commendation of the Parent ‖ 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Eurip. So in our History of
fear Death and 31. Grace thus in Exercise Sermon 31 is but one degree from Glory Now Christians though there are many particular Cases wherein you 'l need Direction yet let me close with this Request Try your utmost what the practical Transcript of these Directions into your Hearts and Lives will produce ere you complain for more That these may be useful to you whoever else censures them as useless shall be the hearty Prayer of June 19. 1674. Your worthless Servant Samuel Annesley The CONTENTS Dr. Annesley Serm. 1 HOw may we attain to love God with all our hearts souls and minds Mat. 22.37 38. Mr. Milward Serm. 2 How ought we to love our Neighbour as our selves Mat. 22.39 Mr. Gale Serm. 3 Wherein the love of the world is inconsistent with the love of God 1 Joh. 2.15 Mr. Jenkyn Serm. 4 How may we improve the present season of grace 2 Cor. 6.1 2. Mr. Veal Serm. 5 What spiritual knowledg they ought to seek for that desire to be saved c. Isa 27.11 Mr. Case Serm. 6 How ought the Sabbath to be sanctified Isa 58.13 14. Mr. Senior Serm. 7 How may we hear the Word with profit James 1.21 Mr. Watson Serm. 8 How may we read the Scriptures with most spiritual profit Deut. 17.19 Mr. Wells Serm. 9 How may we make melody in our hearts with singing of Psalms Eph. 5.19 Dr. Manton Serm. 10 How ought we to improve our Baptism Acts 2.38 Mr. Lye Serm. 11 By what spiritual rules may catechising be best manag'd Prov. 22.6 Mr. Wadsworth Serm. 12 How may it appear to be every Christian 's indispensable duty to partake of the Lord's Supper 1 Cor. 11.24 Mr. Barker Serm. 13 A Religious fast Mark 2.20 Mr. Lee Serm. 14 How to manage secret Prayer that it may be prevalent with God to the comfort and satisfaction of our Souls Mat. 6.6 Mr. Doolitle Serm. 15 How may the Duty of Family-prayer be best manag'd Josh 24.15 Mr. Steele Serm. 16 What are the Duties of Husbands and Wives towards each other Eph. 5.33 Mr. Adams Serm. 17 What are the Duties of Parents and Children Coloss 3.20 21. Mr. Janeway Serm. 18 What are the Duties of Masters and Servants Eph. 6.5 6 7 8 9. Mr. S. C. Serm. 19 The sinfulness and cure of thoughts Gen. 6.5 Mr. West Serm. 20 How must we govern our tongues Eph. 4.29 Mr. Poole Serm. 21 How may detraction be best prevented or cur'd Psal 15.3 Mr. Baxter Serm. 22 What is that light which must shine before men in the works of Christ's Disciples Matth. 5.16 Dr. Wilkinson Serm. 23 How must we do all in the Name of Christ Col. 3.17 Mr. Cole Serm. 24 How may we steer an even course between Presumption and Despair Luke 3.5 6. Mr. Fowler Serm. 25 How Christians may get such a faith as may not only be saving at last but comfortable and joyful at the present 2 Pet. 1.8 Dr. Jacomb Serm. 26 How Christians may learn in every state to be content Phil. 4.11 Dr. G. Serm. 27 How we may so bear afflictions as neither to despise them nor faint under them Heb. 12.5 Dr. Owen Serm. 28 How may we bring our Hearts to receive Reproofs Psal 141.5 Mr. T. Vincent Serm. 29 Wherein doth appear the blessedness of forgiveness and how it may be attained Psal 32.1 Mr. Silvester Serm. 30 How may we overcome the inordinate love of Life and fear of Death Acts 20.24 Mr. Hook Serm. 31 What gifts of Grace are chiefly to be exercis'd in order to an actual preparation for the coming of Christ by Death and Judgment Mat. 25.10 Quest How may we attain to love God with all our Hearts Souls and Minds Serm. I. Matth. 22.37 38. Jesus said unto him Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart and with all thy soul and with all thy mind This is the first and great Commandment IT is fit this Exercise should begin with a general Introduction that may indifferently serve every Sermon that shall be Preach'd I should be much mistaken and so would you too should we think this Text unsuitable let 's therefore not only in the fear but also in the love of God address our selves to the management of it This Command you have in Deut. 6.5 Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart and with all thy soul and with all thy might This Command is not found in Exodus nor in Leviticus but only in Deuteronomy i. e. the second Law of Moses which as some express it bore a Type of the second Law viz. the Evangelical to which this Command is proper for the Old Law was a Law of fear tending to bondage and therefore Moses mentions the incussion of terror in the giving of it which when he hath dispatch'd he begins the following Chapter with Love noting that the Holy Ghost will cause the Law of Love to succeed the Law of Fear And 't is observable that the Jews read this place with the highest observation and their Scribes write the first and last words of the Preface to it with greater Letters than ordinary to amplifie the sense and to note that this is the beginning and the end of the Divine Law and they read this Scripture morning and evening with great * Jansen Harmon The Occasion Religion The occasion of Christ's pressing this command upon them at this time was this when the Pharisees heard how he had baffled the Sadduces and stopped their mouths with so proper and fit an answer that they had no more to say they consult how they may shew their acumen and sharpness of wit to diminish Christ's credit concerning his Doctrine and Skill in Scripture and therefore they chuse out one of their most accomplish'd Interpreters of the Law captiously to propose an excellent question They call him Master whose Disciples they will not be they enquire after the Great Commandment who will not duely observe the least they thought Christ could not return such an answer but that they might very plausibly except against it * Cartw. Harm Auth. imperfect op If Christ should have named any one command to be the greatest their exception was ready why not another as great as that but Christ's wisdom shames their subtilty Christ doth not call any command Great with the lessening of the rest but he repeats the summe of the whole Law and distinguisheth it into two Great Commands according to the subordination of their Objects Thou shalt love c. Though the excellency of the subject calls for the enlargement of your hearts yet the copiousness of it requires the contracting of my discourse To save time therefore let me open my Text and Case both together The Case is this The Case What is it to love God with all the heart
to the Sheeps passing out of the Fold when they were to be Tithed for God Levit. 27.32 they were to be told with a Rod one two three c. and the Tenth was the Lords God will not covenant with us in the lump and body but every one was to be particularly minded of his Duty 't is not enough that our Parents did engage for us in Baptism as the Israelites in the Name of their little ones did avouch God to be their God Dent. 29.10 11 12. No man can savingly transact this Work for another we must ratifie the Covenant in our own Persons and make our own professed subjection to the Gospel of Christ 2 Cor. 9.13 This Work cannot be done by a Proxy or Assigns our Parents Dedication will not profit us without some personal Act of our own if we live to years of discretion Once more this must be done not only in words or visible external Rites which may signifie so much as personal Covenanting with God but a Man must ingage his heart to God Jer. 30.21 yea this is a business that must be done between God and our own Souls where no outward witnesses are conscious to it God speaketh to the Soul in this transaction Psal 35.3 Say unto my Soul I am thy Salvation and the Soul speaketh to God Lam. 3.24 thou art my Portion saith my soul and Psal 16.2 O my soul thou hast said unto the Lord thou art my God thus the Covenant is carried on in Soul-Language Now upon this Personal inward Covenanting with God our right to all the priviledges doth depend 2. Renew often the sense of your Obligation to God and keep a constant reckoning how you lay out your selves for him Acts 27.23 His I am and him I serve Phil. 1.21 To me to Live is Christ Some few Renegado's renounce their Baptism but most Christians forget their Baptism 2 Pet. 1.9 He is blind and cannot see afar off and has forgotten that he was washed from his old sins therefore we should be continually exciting our selves both to obedience and dependence that the sincerity of our first Vow and Consent may be verified by a real and constant performance of it 3. You should use frequent self-reflection that you may come to know whether you are indeed washed from the guilt and silth of sin 1 Cor. 6.11 Such were some of you but now ye are sanctified but now ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the spirit of our God You should observe what further sense you have of the pardon of sin how you get ground upon your bondage of Spirit and grow up into some rejoycing of Faith for by these signs God intended our strong consolation Heb. 6.18 And the Eunuch when he was Baptized went his way rejoicing Acts 8.39 Hath God applyed his Covenant to me Taken me into the Family Planted me into the Mystical Body of Christ and shall not I be glad and rejoyce in his Salvation So for Sanctification see whether God's Interest doth prevail in you or the Interest of the Flesh what Power and strength of Will you get against Corruption easily Gal. 5.16 17. whether sin be more subdued and you can govern your Passions and Appetites better Gal. 5.24 They that are Christ's should find something of this in themselves otherwise their Baptism is but an empty formality Fourthly and Lastly You must use it as a great help in all Temptations as when you are tempted to sin either by the delights of Sense a Christian hath his Answer ready I am no Debtor to the Flesh or I am Baptized and dedicated to God in the way of Mortification and Holiness to obtain pardon and Life 1 Cor. 6.15 Shall I take the Members of Christ c. this Soul this Body this Time this Strength is Christs not to please the Flesh but the Lord Or by the terrors of Sense Dionysia comforted her Son Majoricus an African Martyr when he was going to suffer for owning the God-head of Christ with this Speech Memento Fili Baptizatum esse in nomine Patris Filii Spiritus Sancti Remember my Son that thou art Baptized in the name of the Father Son and Holy Ghost and be constant So when you are tempted by the Devil taking advantage of your Melancholy and grievous afflictions to question God's Love and Mercy to Penitent Believers Remember the Covenant Sealed in Baptism that you may keep up your Faith in God through Christ which pardoneth all your sins and hath begotten us to a lively hope We must expect to be Tempted the Devil tempted Christ after his Baptism to question his filiation so solemnly attested Compare Mat. 3.17 with Mat. 4.16 Luther saith of himself that when the Devil tempted him to despair or to any doubts and fears about the Love of God or his Mercy to Sinners he would always Answer Ecce ego Baptizatus sum credo in Christum Crucifixum Behold I am Baptized and Believe in Christ Crucified And he telleth us of an Holy Virgin who gave this reply when the Devil abused her Solitudes and injected any despairing thoughts into her mind Baptizata sum I am Baptized and entred into God's Covenant and will expect the pardon of my sins by Jesus Christ Thus should we all the daies of our Life improve our Baptism till we have the full of that Holy and Happy estate for which we were first purified and washed in God's Laver. By what Scriptural Rules may Catechizing be be so managed as that it may become most Vniversally Profitable Serm. XI Proverbs 22.6 Train up or Catechize a Child in the way he should go or in his way and when he is old he will not depart from it THIS most Excellent Book of Sacred Aphorisins or Divine Proverbs is by some not unfitly compared to a costly Chain of Orient Pearls among which though there be a fair Connexion yet there is little or no Coherence I shall therefore immediately enter on the words themselves and in them I observe a Precept and a Promise an important Duty and a perswasive Motive 1. A grand important necessary Duty enjoyned Train up or Catechize a Child in the way he should go In which words we have 1. The Act or Duty prescribed Train up or Catechize Piously and prudently instruct and educate 2. The Object or Person that is to be trained up a Child By a Synechdoche all such Younger ones and Inferiours as are committed to the care and conduct of their Superiours 3. The Subject-matter wherein these Inferiours are thus to be trained up In the way he should go In that way or manner of life which most suits and becomes him that makes most for God's Glory and his own temporal spiritual and eternal good 2. Quo semel est in buta recens servabit odrem testa diu Aâ— plurimum So. Observation 2. A Cogent Argument or prevalent Motive to excite and quicken to the faithful discharge of this important Duty And
attained so much knowledg in the Principles of the Christian Religion as that the Heathens might be admitted to Baptism and the Christian Children to the Lord's Supper To this custom some of the Learned judge that Peter alludes in 1 Pet. 3.21 not the putting away of the filth of the flesh but the Answer of a good Conscience towards God 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 1 Pet. 3.15 Aâ—lusio factâ— ad morâ—m veterem Catechistarum irâ—e rogantium Catecâ—umenos a daltos ante Bâ—ptisâ—um 〈◊〉 qui ad Christianismum vel gentilitate vocati Credis Credo Abrenuntias Abrenuntio Cujus origo in exemplo Eunuchi Ac. 8.37 Spant dub Evang. Pars 3. p. 97. Trap. in Mat. 13.51 Bowles Pastor Evaag l. 2. c. 5. by the Resurrection of Jesus Christ True the main thing is the Answer of a good Conscience in a man 's own self yet there was a good Answer in his mouth to the Catechist who was to ask them a reason of the hope that was in them 3. The Primitive Fathers that trod on the Heels of the Apostles and were most likely to be best acquainted with the Apostles practice highly esteemed this way of teaching and constantly used it Cyprian saith Optatus used it at Carthage Origen at Alexandria Hence Clemens Alexander his paedagogus Cyril Mystagog Lactantius his Institutions Athanasius his Synopsis Augustine his Enchirid. Liber de Doct. Christianâ de Catechiz rudibus Fulgentius de fide 4. Many of the Antient Councils made Decrees and Canons for Catechising Concil Neocaes Can. 6.7 Concil Tolet. Can. 24. In this consent all the Reformed Churches uno ore Nay which is more the Papists themselves that were assembled in the Council of Trent observing that in the later Spring of the Gospel the use of Catechizing in the Reformed Churches was one of the special means of with-drawing People from the darkness of Popery to the light of the Gospel and of so firmly grounding professors in the true Religion as nothing could with-draw them from the same and so the Hereticks as they were pleased to stile them had got much ground strongly moved the Councel that there might be a Catechism compiled of the Principles of the Romish Religion as that that was most likely to give check to that deluge of Heresie which through the Hereticks Catechising was breaking in upon them 5. This manner of Teaching by way of Catechising viz. By propounding the Question and putting the child to Answer it as the Echo doth the Voice is a most ready way to make any Instruction to take Whence it is that in all Schools of Learning this course is taken viz. The Teacher propounds his Questions and requires Answers from those that are instructed whereas if you speak never so well or so long yea the longer the worse in a set and continued Speech it useth to vanish in the Air without any observable notice or after fruit 2. Superiors in the Family and these are Parents and Family Governors to whom we may adjoin School-masters and Tutors These all are concerned in this great duty of Training up and Catechizing those that are committed to their Charge and Conduct 1. How deeply Parents are obliged to this Duty is written as it were with a Sun-beam in the Scriptures where we find Precepts Presidents Arguments more than many to evince it Ex. 10.2 Ex. 12.24 26 27 with 13.8 14 15. Josh 4.6 7 21 22 24. Deut. 4.9 10. Ainsw in Deut. 6 6 7. 1. Precepts The Israelites are bound to tell in the ears of their sons and of their sons sons what things the Lord had wrought in Egypt that they also might know Jehovah to be the Lord. The Parents are bound to be Expositors of that great Rite of the Paschal Lamb and of the Stones set up in the midst of Jordan bound also to teach their Children the words which they heard from the Lord their God in Horeb even the Ten Commandments How doth this Duty sparkle with a Radiant Lustre in that great Text Deut. 6.6 7 These words which I Command thee this day shall be in thine heart and thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy Children and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine House and when thou walkest by the way Ainsw in Deut. 6.6 7. and when thou liest down and when thou risest up It is the Eternal God that here gives forth his strict Command to Parents These words all these words Precepts Promises Threatnings shall be in thy heart not in thy head only so as to know but in thy Heart to affect An Heart inflamed with the Love of God and his Truth Joel 1.3 Deut. 11.19 God knew was one of the most effectual means to engage the Tongue to make known his Truth but not only in their Heart but Houses too Thou shalt teach them thy Children nor was this a Ceremonial Precept or a Command given peculiarly to the Jews for their assistance in their Remembrance of the Law of God as their Phylacteries and fringes c. Exod. 13.9 Deut. 6.8 9. but was and is a Moral perpetual standing Precept binding us in Gospel-times as well as them The same things we find in this Text we find also in the New Testament The word of Christ must dwell richly in us all one with this here Let it be in thine heart Col. 3.16 and in our Houses also we must teach and admonish others Eph. 6.4 we are to bring up our Children in the Nurture and Admonition of the Lord. 2. Branches in this Precept 1. Parents warned not to abuse their Authority by provoking their Children In the best of Parents there is not only Natural affection but also Natural corruption by reason whereof if they watch not well they will be very prone not only to be rash but furious with their Children that their Will may be fulfilled Therefore is this bridling Caution needful provoke not 2. Parents are here commanded not to neglect to lay out and improve their Authority in instructing their Children This also is necessary because Parents are too too apt to be fondly indulgent and on that account careless to bring up their Children in such courses as are necessary for knowing and doing the Will of God Both therefore are of special use Do not provoke but instruct Yea in instructing take care that you do not provoke and so instructing you will not at least you shall not have cause to provoke for a well instructed Child is in God's way to be an Obedient Child and very tractable to instructing Parents so that there will be no occasion of provocation from him or being provoked against him Bring them up therefore we must but in what In the Nurture and Admonition of the Lord. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 in all profitable knowledg Vid Zanch. Musc in Loc. suitable to a Child's Age and State for the composing and framing of him by this his knowledg unto a commendable and vertuous carriage for the
them from their Children shewing to the Generation to come the praises of the Lord and his strength and his wonderful work that he hath done Deut. 4 9. 6.7 5. For he established a Testimony in Jacob and appointed a Law in Israel which he commanded our Fathers that they should make them known to their children 6. That the Generation to come might know them even the children which should be born who should arise and declare them to their children 7. That they might set their hope in God and not forget the works of God Thus Hezekiah upon his recovery from death Isa 38.19 The living the living he shall praise thee as I do this day the Father to the Children shall make known thy truth They that survive they alone can and each of them should praise the Lord this being the principal end to which men should live and for which they should desire life Psal 80.18 The Father to the Children shall make known thy truth i. e. they shall transmit the memory of thy faithfulness in the performance of thy promises to Posterity Psal 145.4 3. Arguments 1. The Souls of Children as well as their Bodies are committed to the care and trust of Parents by the Lord to whom they must give a strict account 'T is a grand mistake to think that the care of Souls belongs only to Ministers True indeed it eminently belongs to our Spiritual Pastors Ezek. 3.18 19. If they warn not the wicked from his wicked way to save his life the same wicked man shall dye in his iniquity but his blood will God require at the negligent Pastor's hand Omnia quae deliquerint filii à parentibus requirentur qui non erudierint filios suos Orig. And no less doth God bespeak Parents in the same language that we find 1 Kings 20.39 Keep this man this child if by any means he be missing then shall thy life be for his life If he be lost and miscarry through thy neglect thy life thy Soul shall go for his As therefore Parents dread the guilt of Soul murther of their children they ought to be careful of their pious Education Psal 51.5 2. The state of poor childrens Souls calls aloud on Parents for the discharge of this duty Alas poor Creatures conceiv'd in sin brought forth in iniquity those whom we fondly miscall Innocent Babes come into the World with an Indictment on their Foreheads with ropes about their necks full of guilt full of filth bloody loathsom Creatures Gen. 8.21 Job 14.4 Prov. 22.15 Eph. 2.3 Children of wrath nothing in them by nature that is good Rom. 7.18 An averseness from all good Psal 58.3 Eph. 4.18 A proneness to all evil These young Lyons prone to cruelty they are Serpents in the very Egg and Cockatrices in the very shell Isa 59.5 And whence comes all this guilt and filth but from the hole of the Pit out of which they are digid from that unhappy Rock out of which they are hewn their unhappy Parents Job 14.1 4. 15.14 Isa 51.5 sinful Parents having utterly lost God's Image like Adam beget children in their own Gen. 5.3 Nay Abraham himself though a circumcised Saint as a Natural Father begets an uncircumcised Isaac The Vine they spring from is a Vine of Sodom and therefore the Children are the Grapes of Gomorrah Bloody Parents are we to our Children Exod. 21.19 how much then doth it concern Parents even in common Justice to endeavour to cure those wounds that they themselves have given and to preserve their Little Ones from perishing by that Leprosie infection poyson which they by Nature conveigh into them And here what Topicks do not offer themselves to convince the judgments of Rational Parents 1. There is a 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 a natural love and affection in Parents to their Children Nature gives bowels of pity to them that are in misery specially to children Isa 49.15 Psal 103.13 Will Parents then prove unnatural nay worse than beasts for even the Sea-monsters draw out their breasts and give suck to their young ones Lam. 4.3 Charity edifies saith the Apostle 1 Cor. 8.1 1 Cor. 8.1 David's and Bathsheba's tender love to their Solomon put them upon careful instructing of him wherein they shewed their love to his Soul as well as his Body 2. Parents either do or should principally aim at the Spiritual and Eternal good of their poor Children And what more profitable and effectual way to promote this than pious instruction and education The Earth often proves according to the seeds cast into it The Vessel usually retains a smack and tincture of that with which it was first season'd What Blessings might Parents prove to their Children What excellent things might be effected by them if they did but take the advantage of their tender years and then resolvedly set themselves to bring them in to God 3. Parentt cannot but love themselves their own peace their own comforts their own delights and what more probable means to advance these than the pious education of their children which fully appears by this Dilemma either their conscientious endeavours prove successful or not 1. If not If after all care pains prayer faithfulness the Crop should not answer the Seed why this may relieve and support Liberavit animam suam that it is not through the Parents default The Child dyes but not by the Father's hand He hath discharg'd his duty and thereby in the sight of God deliver'd his own Soul from guilt though he could not deliver his Child's Soul from ruine Where God sees such a willing mind backt with sincere utmost constant endeavours 2 Cor. 8.12 God accepts the faithful Parent according to that he hath and not according to that he hath not But 2. If the Lord please to smile on endeavours into what a transport and extasie of joy will it raise the serious Parent to see the corruption of his Child's Nature heal'd to see saving grace wrought in his heart If such a sight be so pleasing to Spiritual Fathers to Paul 1 Thess 2.10 to John John 3. Ep. v 4. how ravishing must it needs be to Natural Parents Prov. 10.1 and 23 24 25. But especially when this is wrought by their own means 4. When this grace is wrought in the hearts of children and that especially by their Parents this cannot but inflame the hearts of children with dearest love of and ingage them to the highest duty to their Parents they must of necessity be far more loving and dutiful than otherwise they could or would be A wise Son maketh a glad Father But how Prov. 15.20 viz. by a dutiful and respectful carriage 5. By this means Parents shall do unspeakable good to their Families and Posterity Hereby even many Ages after they are dead like Abel Deut. 4.9 they shall yet speak and Posterity hearing the voice of their Ancestors coming as it were from the dead they will be more
apt to credit and believe By pious Education the true Religion is kept up in the world and propagated from Age to Age. The care of the two Tribes and an half of propagating the true Religion to their Posterity is very notable in that famous Scripture Josh 22.24 25. They built an Altar of Testimony v. 10. At this their Brethren the Israelites are highly offended but received full satisfaction when they were assured that this was done for the sake of Posterity lest they should be made to cease from fearing the Lord. 6. Parents have many and great advantages above all others for the successful instructing and educating of their children 1. Children are more confident of their Parents love than any others Whether Ministers and strangers speak to them in love they are uncertain but of their Parents love they are well assured Now nothing takes so much with any one as that which is believed to proceed from love specially by one that loves This instruction saith the loving Child comes not only from my dear Father's lip or head but from his affectionate heart and therefore I will readily receive it and lodg it in my own 2. Parents have their children in hand betimes before they are fly-blown with any false Opinions or leven'd with bad impressions before they have any other sin than that which was born with them Parents therefore have an opportunity of making the first impressions on them even while they are most docile tender flexible and least apt to make resistance against instruction But now when they come to their Minister Instructer Tutor they are as a Paper Printed before and therefore unapt to receive another Impression They have much to be untaught before they can be taught fraught with self conceitedness and proud objections more apt to strive against and resist Instruction than humbly and readily to receive it 3. To wind up this Argument on the closest Bottom Children wholly depend on Parents for their present maintenance and their future Portions and they know 't is their interest to hearken and obey Parents Authority over their Children is most unquestionable They dare not open their mouths against it as they will adventure to do against Ministers Parents have the Power of the Rod to back Instruction Prov. 22.15 They best know the peculiar Diseases and temperatures of their Children and so best know how to chuse and apply the most proper Remedy Parents are nearest their Children and can best discern all their faults in time and have opportunity of speaking to them in the most familiar manner that may best be understood and after this to inculcate their Instructions and drive them home that what is not done at one time may be done at another By all these advantages it appears that God hath furnished Parents above all others to be Instruments of their Childrens good and the first and greatest promoters of their Salvation Object 1 But methinks I hear some Parents muttering To instruct Children is the grand Duty of our Ministers 'T is they that are to take the great charge of the Souls of these our Lambs 1. And do you indeed give up these your Lambs to be fed to be instructed by them 2. Suppose you did as Heaven knows thousands of Parents do not as they ought yet know That every Parent is as deeply charged with the souls of his Children as any Pastor is with the souls of his Flock and more deeply too 1. You are as oft and as expresly charged to use the means to save your Childrens souls and to breed Grace in them as any Minister is Read consider remember Exod. 13.18 Thou shalt shew thy Son the meaning end use of the Sacrament Deut. 6.6 7. Psal 78.5 Eph. 6.4 Shew me any Text of Scripture more express and peremptory for any Ministers Instructing of his Flock 2. Parents stand obliged to their Children by more and stronger Bonds than any Pastor can be to his Flock Bonds of Nature as well as Grace 3. Parents have more means and opportunities to prevail with their Children than any Pastor living can have to do good on his Flock What a surpassing Interest have Parents in the esteem love affection of their Children What Advantage may they take of their Childrens tender years What continual Converse with them What an awful Authority over them What strict Obligations upon them which no Minister can so much as pretend unto The truth is none upon Earth have such fair opportunities to instruct and bring others to goodness as Parents have This was that that holy Hezekiah meant in his Prayer Isa 38.18 19. The Living Deut. 4 10. the Living he shall praise thee and who among all the Living The Father he shall do it chiefly principally but how by making known Thy truth to their Children q. d. Parents by deriving Religion to their Posterity may greatly honour God above others Obj. 2. But to what end should we teach Children Alass they do not understand what they say They do but Act the Parot know not what it is they do repeat and so whilest we pretend to advance the fear and service we do but make our Children to profane the Name of God or to take it in vain Sol. 1. Our carnal Reasonings ought not to countermand Divine injunctions The Text is express Train up a Child Deut. 6.7 Thou shalt teach them diligently to thy Children or whet and sharpen my Law upon them Timothy's Instruction and that from a little sucking Child is commended by the Apostle as a fair president to the whole Christian World 2 Tim. 3.15 We know not who are under God's Election nor the appointed time of his effectual Calling and therefore must use the means to all especially to Children that are under the federal stipulation such are commanded to Remember their Creator in the days of their Youth Eccl. 12.1 And who should endeavour to make deep impressions of God upon their Hearts Eph. 6.4 but those that are over them by Divine appointment who ought to bring them up in the Nurture and Admonition of the Lord. 2. If this fear and jealousie must hinder Catechising of Children who knows how long it will be hindered for even Children well grown up being not before Catechized are not likely at their first Teaching so to understand what is said to them as to repeat it with due reverence Do we not find Christ himself instructing Nicodemus in the great Mystery of Regeneration when he was able to return him no more than that childish Answer How can a Man be born again when he is old John 3.4 Can he enter the second time into his Mothers Womb We find our Saviour delivering a Divine Truth to those that were known to be his Disciples who still accompanied him and repeated themselves what he spake to them in the very same words wherein he delivered it and yet when all was done confessed they could not tell what he said Joh. 16.16
Sure I am they that have not learned their duty to God will never rightly perform their duty to men I heartily wish that proud saucy debaucht behaviour and lame quarrels be not too sad proofs of this unhappy Truth I have done with the fourth I now proceed to the fifth and last Enquiry viz. How the whole affair may be so prudently piously Scripturally managed as that it may become most Vniversally profitable And here I shall first address my self to my Superiours and then close all with directions to Inferiours 1. Then for Superiours and among these Oeconomical ones 1. Let Parents begin betimes with their children 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 as soon as ever they find them to have any use of Reason as soon as ever their understandings begin to bud and blossom The discreet Gardiner begins to graff as soon as ever the Sap begins to arise and the Stock to swell In the Old Law we find more Lambs Kids young Turtles First-fruits and green Corn required than other Elder Sacrifices Levit. 2.14 Sow thy Seed in the Morn Eccl. 11.9 Begin I say betimes the sooner the better according to that of the Prophet Isa 28.9 To whom shall I teach knowledg and whom shall I make to understand Doctrine Them that are weaned from the milk and drawn from the Breasts Old men nay indeed and too many young men think themselves too wise as well as too old to learn Indeed Childhood and Youth are the fittest times to learn in Vdum molle lutum eâ—z nunc nunc prâ—pirandâ—s aâ—riâ—ingendus sine sinc rota 'T is bâ—st drawing a fair Picture on a Rasa Tabula The most legible Characters are best written on the whitest Paper before it be soild and slur'd The Twig whilest young is most easily twisted The Ground best sown when soft and mollified Hence that of the Royal Preacher Eccl. 72.7 Remember thy Creator in the days of thy Youth Little ones have not as yet imbibed such false Principles and Nations nor are they drencht with such evil habits as Elder ones are too too frequently died with He hath a very difficult Province whose task it is to wash out the spots of a Leopard or to whiten an Aethiopian And little less work hath he that undertakes to teach the Truth to one that hath been brought up in and is now as it were Naturalized to Err For those false notions must first be wholly rooted up before Truth can profitably be implanted Such must be untaught much before they can well be taught though but a little 2. Labour as much as in you lies to entertain their tender attention with such â—ruths as mostly affect their senses and fancies and are most easily conveigh'd to their little understandings To wit 1. Such Truths the sparks whereof are most alive in their corrupt nature v.g. To know God that made the whole World and them in particular That this God is to be worshipped That their Parents are to be hâ—noured That no lye is to be told That they must love others as themselves That they must certainly dye and after Death be judged to an Eternal state Begin to season them with the sence of God's Majesty and Mercy 2. Deal as much in Similitudes and plain and easie Resemblances as you can taking your Rise from the Creatures they see and hear always greatly respecting their weak capacity Are you sitting in your Houses you may thus bespeak them Oh my dear Child is this an handsom dwelling this house made with Stones and Timber O how much desirable is that House above with God that House not made with hands but eternal in the Heavens When they awake out of sleep mind them of their Duty Psal 139. Eph. 5.14 of giving their first thoughts to God and of awaking out of sin unto righteousness and of their awaking the last day out of the Grave by the sound of the Trumpet 1 Thess 4.16 Do they see the light of the day shining into their eyes Ask them Is it indeâ—d a pleasant thing to behold the Sun O how excellent then is God's goodness in causing the Sun of Righteousness to arise upon us with healing in his wings Mal 4.2 Are you putting on their cloaths O my Child think on sin which was the cause of your Soul's nakedness and of your Bodies need of apparel Be not proud of your cloaths which are given to hide your shame Never rest satisfied till your Soul be arrayed with the Robes of Christ's Righteousness When at the fire tell them of that Lake of fire and brimstone that burneth for ever into which all those that live and dye in sin shall be cast At Table how easie is it how profitable how delightful will it be out of every Creature there to extract spiritual food for our Souls The Bread minds them of the Bread of Eternal Life their hunger of hungring after Christ's Righteousness By a Rivers side how easie is it to mind them of the Water of Life and of those Rivers of pleasure at God's right hand for evermore Thus may you Psal 16.11 Hos 12.10 Assimilavi 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 properte â—â—enim multis rebus Deum compararunt Patri Pastori amâ—eâ— leâ—niâ— Pool's Synops without the least taedium or disgust teach those little Bees to such spiritual Honey out of every Flower By these similitudes as by so many golden Links you may draw Truths into their heads and memories Thus it pleased the Lord to teach his people of old by using Similitudes Isa 5.1 Ezek. 16.3 Hos 1.2 Thus the Great Bishop of our Souls taught his Disciples by Parables Mat. 13.38 3. Teach them the most useful delightful affectionate stories you can find in the Word of God v.gr. The Creation of Man Man's Fall The Deluge Isaac Sacrificed Lot and Sodom Joseph The Golden Calf David and Goliah Three Children in the Fiery Furnace Daniel in the Lyons Den. Jonah in the Whales Belly The Children devour'd by Bears 4. Betimes acquaint them with the practice of Religious Duties Read the Word Pray give Thanks sing Psalms in their presence 'T is conceived by the Learned that the little Children learnt to sing Hosanna to the praise of Christ by hearing their Parents sing the 118th Psalm out of which that Hosanna is taken 5. Endeavour to restrain them from all evil and to breed in them a Conscience of sin even from the very breast No playing no idle and vain chat on the Lord's Day Exod. 20.10 Ezek. 4.14 Ezekiel from his youth and infancy had not eaten any thing forbidden in the Law Made Conscience of meals when the Appetite was most unruly One fault amended by a Child out of Conscience that it is a sin is worth amending an hundred out of fear of the Rod or hope of reward only 6. Bring them to the publick Ordinances as soon as they can come to be there and kept there without the disturbance of the Church Exod. 20.9 10. The
shouldest sometime sustain some loss in thy outward estate if it be made up with the favour of God and true peace of Conscience in the way of duty and with the real advantage of thy own Soul and the Souls of all thy Family Canst thou be willing to lose nothing for the gaining of Heaven or hadst thou rather that thou and they should lose God and Christ and Glory and Souls and all Surely when you come to cast up your accounts what you have got and what you have lost your gains will prove your loss 10. If God should bring back some from the Grave and Hell and set them in this world again dost thou think that they would so follow the World and run up and down after money that they would say they could find no time to pray that they might escape that dreadful place of Torment they had been in If some of those that have been in Hell but a Moneth or two were now in thy circumstances dost thou think they would not let their work stand still or rise the sooner and sit up the later or would deny themselves much of their eating time and sleeping time that they might have time to pray Lord let us not go down to Hell again O let us not return to the place which we have found to be so restless and so dreadful And shouldst not thou be as much and often and as earnest with thy Family that neither thou nor any of thine be cast into it I durst not let this pass though I am sensible I have taken up too much room without endeavouring to remove this hindrance that lyes in the way to keep many Families from their knees in Holy Prayer I beg for the Lord's sake and for your Soul's sake that you would watch against it and resolve against it and that your worldly Interest shall no longer keep you from Family Prayer In the close then of all that hath been said Let me in the Name of God exhort you all to the practice of Family Prayer You have heard it proved to be your duty you have been directed how you might manage it for the good of all in your houses you have had motives to press you to the performance of it your pretences and excuses brought against it have been manifested to be frivolous and vain What say you Sirs Will you resolve upon it here in the presence of the Lord or will you still neglect it Shall I lose all my labour or shall it be in vain that I have preached and you have heard this Doctrine I tell you to your faces it shall not be in vain the word of the blessed God shall convince you and reform you or condemn you What come we hither for but faithfully to shew you your duty and earnestly to perswade you to obey Do Ministers study for you when you are sleeping in your beds and declare the mind and will of God in the Congregation and will you cast all our counsel behind your back I hope you will be wiser for your own everlasting happiness Say then Are you convinced in this point that it is your duty If not view over again what hath been said and seriously consider it and let me beg this at your hands that you would think of all Now as you would do if you were with an awakened Conscience upon your dying bed or if you were standing at God's Judgment barr and when this question is put to you whether you ought to pray in your Families Let Conscience say Yes or No according as its verdict and dictate shall be at Death and Judgment and then I am perswaded you will say you are convinced you ought to do it And are you indeed What! and yet go on in the omission of it Will you so sin against your Consciences will you dare so to do You Parents for God's sake consider in what a condition you have brought your Children into the world are they not by nature enemies to God dead in sin children of wrath unfit for Heaven Such Parents are like the Ostrich You negligent Parents read Job 39.13 to 19. and Lam 4.3 Look your faces in that Glass Do you not blush Look that you are so like to such a foolish bird Struthio-camelus derâ—linquit ova sua in terra crudelis in prolem nihil praestupiditate oblivione crudelitate filiis suis timet Vales. Phil. Sac. Sicut haec avis non curat sua ova ita insipientes non curant instrui liberos in pietate Franzius The Ostrich if it thrust her neck or head into any shrub or bush and get that hidden thinks her self safe and that no man seeth her Plin. Nat. Hist Such fools are these ungodly Parents that if they get their heads under their roofs remember not that God seeth their great neglect there and in danger of damnation and will you not so much as pray daily with them that they may be delivered out of this condition and be saved from damnation is it nothing to you whether your Children are damned or saved is it nothing to you whether they live with the blessed glorious God or with cursed Devils and damned Souls have you no pity nor compassion for them that are flesh of your flesh where are the earnings of your hearts where are the workings of your bowels if their bodies were a dying would you not pray by their bed sides that they may be preserved from â—he grave and will you not that their Souls might be saved from Helâ— Dare you not be guilty of the murder of their bodies and dare you of their Souls do not the Laws of men justly hang those that do the one and will not the Laws of God righteously damn them that do the other You Fathers and you Mothers can you look upon your Graceless Christless Children and not pity them and weep over them and call them to you to come and pray with you have you not a word to say to God for them in their hearing will you not call them to this duty and let them be eye-witnesses of the tears that you should shed in lamenting their sinful state and misery thereby and ear-witnesses of the requests you put up to God for their conversion and how might this work upon their hearts if they were But what shall I say to you Fathers and to you Mothers that do neglect your duty which God requireth for the good of your Children the Father doth not pray the Mother doth not perswade him nor intreat him so to do and by the negligence of both the Children are ungodly Are they more wicked or you more cruel They are full of Impiety and you are full of cruelty both Father and Mother because it is so much long of you that they are so bad Crudelis Mater magis an puer Improbus ille Improbus ille puer crudelis tu quoque mater Virg. Eclog. 8. Appendatur hoc Crudelis pater es per te
striving could not be removed till it had stifled him Let Children learn hence to take heed of being ungrateful to their Patents for fear of the dreadful consequence thereof Thus we have seen three particulars of Childrens actiue obedience there is yet another which is more passive and that is 4. Submission or subjection to Parental discipline with all lowliness of mind (f) Phil. 2 3. acknowledging their coercive authority and therefore are Children oblig'd with patience to bear their Parents rebukes whether verbal or real considering in charity they design good The ignorance imperfection and corrupt inclinations of Children born in sin require Parents animadversion and the Childrens submission both to their Admonitions and Corrections 1. Their Admonitions when in their watchful inspection they give check unto exorbitant behaviour and lay restraints upon their Children who should indeed stand in great awe of those reproofs and threats which do arise from Parents displeasure When Jonadah's posterity were tempted to act in complaisance with others their Fathers forewarning kept them in awe that they did not violate his appointment (g) Jos 35.6 and so upon doing amiss an ingenuous Child will amend There should be shame upon a Father's frown and discountenance (h) Numb 12.14 yea though Parents should be out in the matter as well as manner and be too quick in their rebukes as it should seem Jacob was with Joseph for his dreams not considering what signal motion of God was in them yet the Children should bear it as Joseph did (i) Gen. 37.10 and as Jonathan did his Father's unkind exprobation (k) 1 Sam. 20.30 c. It is true Jesus took up his Mother in one instance but it was in his Heavenly Father's cause which he was concern'd in as God-man (l) Luke 2.49 Yet in other cases they should not only bear but amend upon admonition as Moses did upon his Father in law's dislike of that task he took upon himself alone (m) Exod. 18.13 17.24 whereas on the other hand Ely's Sons slighted their Father's reproof (n) 1 Sam. 2.25 and such others there are who scorn to be told of their faults (o) Prov. 13.1 though they loose God's favour by it and are accounted fools by him who is never out in his censure when the submiss are prudent going on in the way of life (p) 3.34 35. 15.5 3.23 Many Children are impatient of just restraints in their meats drinks apparel and recreations not considering the advantage of self-denyal and patience learn'd betimes when as others can say experimentally they had been undone if they had not been early curb'd Monica Austin's Mother ‖ Aug. Conf. l. 8. c. 9. having in her minority been educated to temperance when growing up and getting from under that severer tuition by the insinuation of a jocund companion was drawn to drink her whole draughts till upon the upbraiding of her associate she reform'd her self and observ'd her former rules of temperance Reverend Mr. Greenham used to say Be most moderate in those things which thine appetite liketh best and check thy too much greediness of them And another said well †Citante Steph. Guazi de civili convers p. 376. maluisse se infirmum quam delicatum esse c. That he had rather be infirm than delicate sith weakness only can hurt the body alone but delicacies may at once corrupt both body and mind and more than that may also render any one unjust by reason they make him covetous to get that which may maintain them and also dull and regardless of the Word of God and the service of his friends and country I have in my own observation seen Children prove well who have submitted to the prudent restraints and admonitions of their watchful Parents and Guides as to these things and others ruin'd who when they have been told of their faults have swell'd and rag'd against those that have lov'd them best yea in a most unchristian manner So necessary it is to submit to Parents admonitions So also to 2. Their corrections or real chastisements whether by stripes or other punishments inflicted sith we should imagine Parents come to this sharp and unpleasant work out of a principle of love (q) Prov. 13.24 with an aim at their Childrens good (r) 22.15 and it is look'd upon in Scripture a Rul'd Case that reverence with submission is paid to the Parents of our flesh (s) Hebr. 12.9 when under their rod which we are to bear and upon the feeling of it to amend what is amiss as some kind of satisfaction (t) Prov. 29.17 whereas disdain and stubbornness spoils all and if it be persisted in may sometimes occasion Parents to call in the posse magistratus (u) Deut. 21.18 19 c. The Greek word 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 in the Epistle to the Hebrews translated We gave them reverence doth import that we Children when faulty under our Fathers frowns and stripes turn'd our faces with shame and blushing at our unworthy acts not able to look them in the face as the Prodigal upon his return (w) Luke 15.21 with Tit. 2.8 which accords as some have noted ‖ Laws on Hebr. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 to the Hebrew word which is in this case to submit with humility to them in this Relation Because though we cannot bear that others should beat and scourge us yet our Parents as having power upon a just cause to punish by vertue of their Superiority and our dependence upon them whose end is or should be their Childrens reformation and therefore is in mercy to prevent further sin and misery in complyance with God's command they correct their ofspring to save it from hell though many an inconsiderate Child may at present conceive the Father correcting to be a severe Judge when as to intended amendment he is indeed a loving Father So that though it seem to be jarring and harsh musick disagreeable to the faulty Patient yet it will sound sweeter to the judicious ear than the melody of a luscious and disorderly indulgence Ingenuous Children have acknowledg'd the benefit of Paternal correction especially after they have sought to God by Prayer that God would sanctifie the rod to their good That was a good practical answer of one of Zeno's Scholars Citante Steph. Gua2zi de civil Convers who to his Father asking what wisdom he had learned by being so long abroad said He was able to shew it at any time which he did to the purpose not long after when his Father chastising him with strokes he took it quietly and patiently shewing that he could sustain the displeasure of his Parent without any untoward reparties In short Children should in all these duties deport themselves with piety toward their Parents being in that relation they bear the image of God as Creator Upholder and Governour of the World So that resistance yea surly and rude replies are a
can be urg'd to the performance of all generous actions viz. because it is well-pleasing to the Lord. So 't is express God himself in Covenant is taken with it with this Chain on a Child's neck as I may allude to that of Christ to his Spouse (e) Cant. 4.9 because it sets forth the beauty and loveliness of a Child as a Child The Lord hath given it in charge to all Christian Children here in my Text and elsewhere (f) Eph. 6.1 as a vigorous enforcement of the fifth Commandment The supreme authority of our Heavenly Father who hath an uncontrollable dominion over us makes any duties which he requires highly reasonable But he who is a rewarder of those that diligently seek him (g) Heb. 11.6 assures the dutiful he takes much pleasure in these Relative duties that they are not only pleasing but well-pleasing to him Certainly it should hugely raise the spirits of all ingenuous Children to be most solicitous in filling up their Relation Dear Children I am hemm'd in as it were by what I am yet to say for Parents duties that I cannot here dilate my self by descending into particulars to perswade the embracing of an exhortation to these duties But if you be Christians indeed who understand your interest I can give you the quintessence of all Motives within the bounds of my Text. Consider it well I beseech you 't is this By your accurateness in these duties you do that which is 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 well-pleasing to the Lord to your and my Lord and Master Do this please the Lord and you do all this is right (h) Eph. 6.1 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 whether present or absent that you may be accepted of him (i) 2 Cor. 5 9. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 or wellpleasing to him is the highest you can attain to What can I What need I say more I could tell you in pleasing of God you do that which doth or should please your Parents and will be most pleasant to your selves and then you must needs be happy when God and you are pleas'd As in the keeping all God's Commandments there is an exceeding great reward (k) Psal 19.11 Gen. 15.1 so this hath a Primacy in the Promise (l) Eph. 6.1 Prov. 4.10 22. Upon that account it is profitable and beneficial yea it is honest and honourable before God (m) 1 Tim. 5.4 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 every way right agreeable to God's positive Law the Law of Nature and the Law of Nations It is the Parents due as in the place of God they bear his Image in their Parental authority and relation (n) Mal 1.6 with 1 Sam. 2.30 they deserve it we owe it to them as a debt So that disobedience to Parents is against Scripture the light of Nature the common equity of all Nations and renders such persons unworthy the Christian Name and worse than Infidels and Brutes Such were Hophni and Phineas (o) 1 Sam. 2.25.34 Absolom (p) 2 Sam. 18.9 and Adonijah (q) 1 Kings 2.25 Have you then my beloved Children any respect to God his good pleasure or displeasure to your Parents their right or wrong their blessing or cursing to your selves looking for recompence or fearing vengeance Consider then I pray you what you have to do 'T is no arbitrary thing I am perswading to but that which is required by an eternal indispensable Law fortified with the most signal rewards and punishments yea even in this state as you may find in the Annals of most Dominions Yet further you Christian Children are now took into a Covenant-Relation with God as the Jewish Children were under that Paedagogy (r) Rom. 9.4 compar'd with Deut 4.2 Eph 6 1 2. Mic. 7.20 Deut. 32.13 14. 2 Chro. 1.9 10 11. Psal 86.6 Consider I beseech you how much you are indebted to your Parents for pleading the Covenant and Promises on your behalf (ſ) Psal 112.1 2. Prov 20.7 Gen. 49.26 Psal 115.13 14. This obedience to Parents is commended in Scripture you 'l get a lasting reputation by it (t) Ruth 4.15 16. God and men honour the obedient grac'd with this ornament (u) 1 Sam. 2.30 Prov. 1.9 13.18 Jer. 35.18 19. The examples of Sem and Japhet Isaac Jacob Joseph c. are in Scripture recorded to their perpetual honour In Heathen Story the Piety of Aenaeas to his aged Father and the obedience of others is celebrated This is the way to have the good things of this and a better life entail'd upon posterity (w) Gen. 9.23 26 27. 'T is equity you should do as you would have them to do to you in the like circumstances The Philosopher †Arist Ethic. l. 8. c. 16.14 thought none could ever give Parents honour answerable to their merit that there is no equalizing their descending growing love they were the instruments of Childrens having affections because of their being They may then claim your best affections and actions Upon which account it is that want of natural affection as it is the most monstrous so it is the most dreadfully punish'd by God (x) 1 Sam. 4.11 Deut. 21.20 21. Senec. l. 5. contra 4. in fine Instit 6 de pub judicio Yea and for Parricides the old Romans had a strange and unusual punishment in culeum dejicere to put them alive into a great leather Sack made of an Ox-Hide with a live Dog a Cock a Viper and an Ape at first it was with Serpents after the murtherers of Parents had been made bloody with scourging then sewed up close and cast into Tiber or the next River that whiles alive they might begin to want the use of all the Elements not having the benefit of the Heavens while they liv'd nor the burial of the Earth when dead This shews how odious this crime was in the height of it to mere Heathen men also Be sure the beginning of it in the want of natural affection is very displeasing to God (y) Gen. 6.3 with Judg. 14 3. but the obedience I have been describing is very amiable to his eye It keeps from evil and disposeth to reverence God himself (z) Lev. 19.4 with 2 3. It helps to be good Subjects and conduceth to the vvelfare of our Countrey God makes choice discoveries of himself to obedient ones in filial duties as he did eminently to Jacob (a) Gen. 28.7 10.11 being peculiarly present vvith them vvho do choose the things that please him and lay hold of his Covenant (b) Isa 56.4 as those Children do who obey their Parents in all things in the Lord. All encouragement lyes in this obedience is well-pleasing to the Lord. But it is more than time now I have put Children upon their duties following the Apostle that I come to II. My next General propos'd which is the office of Parents enforc'd from the special consideration of that the Apostle suggests to move to it I
shall 1. speak to the office and then 2. a little to the enforcement of it here 1. Concerning the office we may by an affection of a Trope so expound the provocation in my Text forbidden Christian Parents 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 that in a short manner of speech the Negative doth emphatically intend more than is express'd as including the Positive wherein the office of Parents provident care and well treating of their Children being of great weight and extent is connoted to us 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 The charge which the Apostle gives here to all the Fathers of our flesh from the Father of mercies according to the original word is not to irritate their Children which is somewhat different from the prohibition to the Ephesians (c) Eph. 6.4 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 provoke not your Children to wrath this in my Text seeming to deny more generally So that he allows not of any kind of abuse of the paternal authority which may justly irritate or provoke the passions of Children an ill effect produced in their hearts and proceeding from any male-administration of the Father's power which in rigor is more apt to exceed its bounds than the Mothers either in substracting a fit allowance for nourishment and nurture not a usual fault which yet the Apostle taxeth (d) 1 Tim. 5.8 and Quintilian complain'd of * Lib. 1. c. 2. or loading them with impious (e) Mat. 14 8. and inhumane commands (f) 1 Sam 20.31 without necessity compelling to sordid and servile works not fit for ingenuous Children but slaves or treating them for not just hitting their humour with contumelious words (g) 30. pouring forth curses out of that mouth that should bless sith the name of Father breathes sweetness and benignity bitter words and the language of a barbarous enemy will be apt to exasperate when upon any little enormities a Father shews himself morose and sharp it may be beating his Children to gratifie his own lust and rage or inflicting other penalties no way proportion'd to the fault if any (h) 33. compar'd with Deut. 25 1 2. chastening not with the rod of men or the stripes of the children of men i. e. not in a humane way with gentleness and moderation (i) 2 Sam. 7.14 or by imperiousness for some self-respects as wordlings impose upon their Children in the great concern of changing their condition c. be sure it is contrary to the prohibition which imports that the Parents conduct should be moderated betwixt the extremes of an unwarrantable indulgence and rigor that it may tend to their Childrens benefit and their own satisfaction They should so deport themselves in this good government that their Children may both love and honour their presence not being too fond lest their Children should not fear them nor too stern lest they should fear them too much The moving Principle to be premis'd which influenceth Parents and enclineth them effectually to exert a provident care in all the branches of it is an imbred natural affection of love which did act Abraham (k) Gen. 22.2 Isaac and Rebekah (l) 25.28 in the Old Testament and is called forth in the New m (n) Tit. 2.3 Rom. 1.31 as the fundamental requisite to sway Parents in the exercise of their authority and a due performance of their Relative office in all the severals of it so that they may indeed adorn the Gospel Out of this inward Principle arise Dues from Parents to their Children more general viz. 1. Prayer and 2. Good Behaviour and more particular with respect to the 1. Birth 2. Nourishment 3. Education 4. Disposal and 5. Maintenance of their Children and 6. their own departure from them all according to the dictates of humane and Christian prudence 1. The more general and previous duties wherein Parents are concern'd for the sake of their Children as well as themselves are Prayer and good Behaviour which give success to all the following particular ones respectively and without which they will not be well discharg'd so as they should be by a Christian Parent who is oblig'd to rule his own house well having his Children in subjection with all honesty or as we render it with all gravity (n) 1 Tim. 3.4 5. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 I know not well how to omit yet can but touch on these 1 Prayer Parents are to make their requests known to God without ceasing (o) 1 Thes 5.17 upon all occasions for all things throughout the whole course of their Childrens lives they are concern'd to be daily Orators at the Throne of grace that God would make their Children his Children and confer upon them all temporal and spiritual blessings this is requisite to the having of Children and the having of them good 'T is a mercy to have them as Isaac Hannah and others had (p) Gen 25.21 1 Sam. 1 10. as a return to prayer which is also a means to have them good (q) Gen. 17.18 20. 1 Chron. 22.12 29.19 Ps 72 per. totu◠sith the sincere Parent 's prayer may reach his Child in every particle of its life in the womb as Rebekah did hers (r) Gen 25.22 and in the world at the ingress with Zachariah's (s) Luke 1.64 progress with Job's (t) Job 1.5 and egress with David's who made his petition more fervent with fasting (u) 2 Sam. 12.16 and when the Parent is leaving his Children as Isaac (w) Gen. 27.4 all which shew the benefit of paternal requests for the fruit of their bodies Monica Augustin's Mother was very earnest frequent and pathetical in her addresses to God for her Husband and Son and she had gracious returns for both How wicked then are those Parents who follow their Children yea without provocation too with imprecations and direful curses instead of prayers 2. Good Behaviour before God and man in love to their Children To follow prayer in upright walking is the best course Parents can take to entail a blessing upon their Children and make them good indeed The seed of the just or merciful man who walketh in his integrity shall be blessed after him (x) Prov. 20.7 3.22 The generation of the righteous have certainly the surest Deed of entail for inheriting of blessings that can be made (y) Psal 112.2 Deut. 5.29 4.8 9. sith God hath given promises thereof unto gracious persons who really walk with him and before him according to his holy statutes (z) Gen. 17.1 7. Acts 2.39 1 Kings 11 12. 'T is the Lord's usual way to confer his favours in this channel so that Parents are concern'd to carry themselves well upon this account And what ifluence their good behaviour hath on their Children as they set fair patterns to them may be touch'd on afterwards I hasten to speak to 2. The more particular duties of Parents with their several respects as 1. To the birth of the Child whiles it
entertainment viz. Sit not down in the highest Room lest it be the place of one more honourable (z) Luke 14.7 8. Agreeing with the Old Law (a) Lev. 19.32 Thou shalt rise up before the hoary head and honour the face of the old man and fear thy God And those of the Wise man (b) Prov. 25.6 7 8 9 16 20. Stand not in the place of great men it is better it be said to thee come up hither than that thou shouldst be put lower be not contentious disclose not secrets speak as becometh boast not be temperate in diet weary not thy neighbour with thy company be not rude and foolish before those in mourning be charitable c. to that purpose Solomon It is expected that Parents give prudent precepts to inform their Children how to speak and act in a decent orderly manner with a becoming grace in their circumstances (c) 1 Cor. 14.40 to use words and titles of respect and honour to their Superiors and Equals as he in the Gospel I go Sir (d) Mat. 21.30 And likewise a decent silence suitable gestures attention modest looks and bowing which though they may seem trivial yet the neglect of them will argue much rudeness irreverence and indecency whereas Christian Children should learn to do all things well (e) Job 29.9 11. Mark 7. â—7 Mat. 5.47 yea and to outdo any mere moralists in such civilities as are really material decent and not fantastical Parents should further give their Children such rudiments early as are indeed instructive to prepare them for a particular vocation or course of life agreeable to their temper and quality Here somewhat might be said of that sith man is born to trouble or labour (f) Job 5.7 Gen. 3.19 in some special service as they in the Scriptures have done (g) 4.2 37.2 Exod. 29.9 2.16 But I must not stay yet shall touch of Parents placing their Children into employments anon The late Books about the Gentleman 's Calling and the Ladie 's Calling and Education will shew after and with others* the benefit of these for those Children of the best as well as meanest condition ‖ Bp. Sandersoâ— Mr. Baxter's Christ Ethic. c. whether males or females where it may be observed that different Rules in some particulars for the education of Boys and Girls are to be given by discreet Parents †Guazz de civil conversat God who is severe against idleness expects all should employ their talents in such a professed way of life as he vvill approve of In order hereunto and for the attaining of the best gifts (h) 1 Cor. 12.31 great care is to be took and ingenious devices may be used to get Children imbued with the principles of learning and abilities to read write c. But I must haste on Yet here I cannot but disallow the indoctrinating of Children with superstitious notions vvhich nuzzle them up in vulgar errors that lead unto unbelief the affrighting of them vvith silly tales of Bugbears stories of Hobgoblins and Fairies c. profane and old wives Fables not tending to godliness (i) 1 Tim. 1 4.6 2.7 which occasion needless and groundless fears that afterwards when they should have more brains are not easily corrected or not without great difficulty remov'd And in my opinion the teaching of Children to beat inanimate Creatures is not to be allow'd both because it disposeth their weak understandings to misapprehensions of things and also teacheth them to inflict punishment in some instances when ordinarily they themselves do rather in some little proportion deserve it and then it stirs up in them a spirit of revenge whereas God hath appropriated vengeance to himself as universal Judge (k) Deut. 32.35 Rom. 12.19 Heb. 10.30 Psal 49.1 And we smile at a little dog for snarling at a stone yet see not the evil of making level and distorted conceptions in Children which may occasion a spiteful heart (l) Ezek. 25.15 a disposition very displeasing to God 3. Moderate chastisements to accompany the notices of good carriage Correction in a due manner and also suitable rewards for well-doing are necessary to check rudeness and encourage an ingenuous deportment As good documents do put in wisdom so due corrections do drive out folly (m) Pâ—ov 22.15 with 6. A child is not to be left to himself lest he bring the Parent to shame when a rod and reproof may give wisdom to prevent it (n) 29.15 Therefore God bids (o) 17. Correct thy Son and he shall give thee rest yea he shall give delight to thy Soul Elsewhere (p) 23.13 14. Withhold not correction from the child for if thou beat him with the rod he shall not die Thou shalt beat him with the rod and deliver his Soul from hell Here is not only a precept but promise of good fruit upon discharge of the duty in a right manner but it should be sued out by Prayer (q) 2 Sam. 7.27 28 the rather because the neglect of this duty is very dangerous to root and branch parent and child (r) 1 Sam. 3.13 1 Kings 1.6 yea and the greater need there is of Parents Prayer here lest they should fall into the extreme which my Text emphatically forbids Christian Parents whose Children are to obey them in the Lord are concern'd to chastise in the fear of God and therefore to seek that this appointment of his may be sanctified (s) 1 Tim. 4.5 Mich. 6 9. being joyned with instruction that it may be prevalent by the blessing of God in Christ whom the Heathen Philosophers have no regard to And here further Parents are concern'd to use much Christian prudence that their Children may understand 1. That they are from a Principle of love for their Children amendment and welfare necessitated to this sharp work (t) Rev. 3.19 which God hath enjoyn'd them in just circumstances as he himself chasteneth whom he loveth (u) Heb. 12.8 Deut. 8 5. And therefore if they should spare the rod through fondness God who knows the heart and affections best might censure them for hating their children (w) Prov. 13.24 3.12 whom they would not have been so severe with if they could have reform'd them at a cheaper rate Hence 2. That it is their childrens folly not their own passion which hath engag'd them in this smarting exercise wherein overmuch heat would be like an over-hot medicine that scalds rather than cures Some Parents are apt to go beyond just measures and to chastise for their own pleasure (x) Heb. 12.10 but they must learn of God to aim at their childrens profit and not correct them but upon good reason Even Plutarch could determine that punishment should never be inflicted for flesh-pleasing Parents should not take the rod to vent their own anger but to subdue their childrens sin which a man may not suffer upon his neighbour without rebuke lest he be guilty
an insinuation into their affections to engage children to love and delight in their duties by the sweetness of the lips to encrease their learning (c) 21. and encourage their honest endeavours with suitable rewards And on the other hand seasonable admonitions and remembrances in case of failures a frowning on their laziness and neglects of those offices wherein they should be employ'd which will keep them in awe though this must be done with great skil and vvariness lest it produce a slavish fear which slothful disingenuous and low spirits are apt to fall into and then absurdly to plead (d) Mat. 25.24 25 26. yet of the two it is better to fail on this hand than for a Christian Parent to omit warning of their children because both Law and Gospel require as vvas partly hinted before vve should not let sin either of omission or commission rest on our neighbour (e) Lev. 19.17 but should warn a brother (f) Gal. 6.1 much more a child and set him in joynt with a spirit of meekness I grant this duty of dayly inspection is very difficult but it is amiable and excellent it is of great latitude for Parents are evermore concernÌ„d to be eying of their children to see they do that which is necessary and comly both in religious and moral practice according to what is really best esteem'd in civil behaviour They must continually be watching them as to their praying reading hearing eating drinking playing visiting studying working sleeping c. to see they be not vain or idle because commonly there is but a little distance in time betwixt doing of nothing and doing of ill Children should be exercised with variety taught to sing Psalms (g) Deut. 31.19 21. Psal 148 12 13. as those good children vvere who made that short prayer to our Saviour Hosanna in Greek out of the Psalm (h) 118.25 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Save O Lord I beseech thee viz. blessed Messiah to pray in secret sometimes by and for themselves to be constant timely and revered at Family duties to be charitable respectful to the Embassadors of Christ to be attentive to the reading of Chapters and hearing of Sermons and thereupon to put Questions and give some account of their understanding of things and be not as Parrats that chatter vvithout knowledg to be observant of the Lord's days not left to themselves to play and do what they list for as Solomon observeth (i) Prov. 29.15 A child left to himself bringeth his Mother to shame she being either more indulgent in suffering him to get head or more affected with it when she seeth the evil of his idleness especiallly on the Lord's days But on other days at fit seasons such honest sports and recreations agreeing with the childrens temper are to be allow'd as do not alienate their minds from duty but promote health and chearfulness admit they be not with ungodly play-fellows from vvhom ribaldry and profaneness are easily learn'd but nothing that is good The Philosopher †Arist de Rep. l. 8. c. 17. did advise the educators of children to take heed they did not permit them to accompany vvith such of whom they would learn bad words hear smutty fables or be brought to look upon indecent and deformed pictures and that they did converse as little as may be with Servants And in eating and drinking Parents should with discretion lay restraints upon childrens appetites both as to the quantity and quality of food consonant to the rules of right reason that they transgress not the wholsom Laws of Temperance for the preservation of strength and activity of body and mind So for their studying and working c. a continued inspection is requisite that they do not neglect their time or mispend their talents vvhich that they may not do will usually need the Parents best skill and utmost diligence because of inbred pravity and untractableness Yet as one ‖ P. Du. Moul. hath well observ'd there be certain handles to take hold of these little souls in their tender years sith most of them are apt to be Shamefac'd Fearful Curious and Credulous which dispositions are to be attended by vigilant Parents with discretion and laid hold on to lead to vertue As on the other hand those hindrâ—ncâ—â— to good things which soon bewray themselves in little ones are to be watch'd over and curb'd such as Pride Wilfulness Lying and Intemperance that these evil inclinations may not be predominant Shame is to be manag'd to disswade from things dishonest Fear to keep in awe from consideration of punishment or loss of reward Curiosity to form in the mind right notions of things and Credulity to gain the consent to things honest and good and to make a right tincture which may abide Then on the other side vicious inclinations are to be timely curb'd As Pride arising from corrupt self-love to plant in young minds humility Wilfulness to engage unto teachableness Lying to make way for justice and fidelity and Imtemperance for the love of truth and sobriety that the understanding may rule the appetite Upon which account the same person suggests we should not promise children Junkets as the reward of their obedience but honour and praise which they should be made to love which is the great thing they of Japan †Gloriae studium cupiditatem teneris animis implantare consucverunt c. Varen de Regn. Jap p. 102. use to implant in the tender minds of their little ones proposing glory as the strong motive to perswade them unto obedience and good carriage I should not have insisted so long upon this but that I dare be bold to say it is through default of this part of Education I mean for want of watchfulness that the Children of many Parents amongst us fall so much short of the instructions received Their passions grow strong and the things that gratifie sense luscious their Parents heed not and so the hopeful fruit is blasted and spoiled for want of fence or as in some gardens where there be fine buds and fruits coming on that have been raised with great pains and charges they suffer Snails and Caterpillers to increase which in a short time devour that the Master's and Gardiner's eye and hand might easily at first have prevented by taking away the Caterpillers egs and killing of the Snails So you may see in some Families where there were great hopes of children as of the pleasant fruits on a fair tree ripening all lost for want of Parents and Governours narrow inspection or through a tender Mother's unlimited indulgence where she should keep a strict watch and through the connivance ‖ Imberbis juvenis tandem custode remoto Gaudet equis caniâ—usque aprici gramine campi Horat. or misplac'd kindnesses of some affectionate servants who to ingratiate with their young Masters or Mistresses take upon them to be wiser than those that love them best and secretly
a religious and prudent a pleasing person should be chosen amiableness helps to root and settle amity which gains reputation by an inheritance (d) 7.11 But in these things especially the last without regard to the former Parents should take heed of exercising Tyranny and when God hath given them children how they give them away be careful herein they do not contrary to my Text discourage their dutiful children by pressing them to marry where they cannot love Because herein one †Mr. Fuller's Holy State characters the good Parent to be such as draws arguments from his childrens good rather than his own authority accounting it a style too princely herein to will and command he rather chooseth to will and desire remembring the Parental power is for edification not destruction and should not be exerted to cast a child against its mind upon a disaffected much less an unworthy match In the treaty of marriage betwixt Isaac and Rebekah when there vvas a good agreement betwixt Abraham's Steward and her Father and Brother they vvould not come to a conclusion till the Maid vvas call'd and ask'd as to her affection and consent (e) Gen. 24 57. Hostis est uxâ—â— invita quae ad maritum nupta dat r. Plaut All vvas but complement till that vvas gain'd Parents herein are to perswade upon good reason but 't is too harsh to attempt the compelling of love Some rigorous ones are apt for their own vvorldly advantage to use their awful authority in matching to constrain their obedient children contrary to their affections and dispositions but they should rather learn of their Heavenly Father vvho disposeth all things sweetly and vvould have them to do so too in the disposal of their children he would have them do more vvith the sway of love than power and to be rather affectionate than imperious in their Government Grave and prudent Dr. Harris †In his life condescended to his sons saying When you are youths choose your Callings when men choose your Wives only take me along with you it may be old men may see further than you Be sure then they see well when they aim chiefly at piety As an ancient Hermite relates * In Prato spirituali in his own life the consultation of a principal inhabitant of Constantinople with his Lady about the disposal of their only child which was a daughter the result whereof was not to look at greatness and riches lest marrying her to a vitious person they should make her miserable but rather to one of a lower rank fearing God vvho from conscience of his duty would love and make much of her and so render her condition comfortable in prosecution whereof they found out and bestowed her upon the honest son of a very charitable Father who had a small Estate but great Vertue with whom she lived very happily But my discourse swells and I must shorten what remains 5 Maintenance is another part of the Parents office towards their children unto whom they are to allow a competency according to their quality and estates to live upon A just allowance for subsistence is presupposed requisite to the right discharge of the precedent duties from Parents to Children both in their minority and when come to maturity for the accommodating of them with necessaries according to their birth The neglect of which temporal provision would argue Christian Parents worse than Infidels who are not so enormous (f) 1 Tim. 5.8 Sith amongst the barbarous people they spare not cost to provide suitably for the fruit of their bodies till at least they are able to carve for themselves Our blessed Saviour takes for granted amongst the common notions of mankind that Earthly Parents will give good gifts unto their needy Children which are most proper for them (g) Mat. 7.9 11. Luke 11.11 But as a superaddition unto this general provision there is also somewhat more particular which even Nature it self teacheth upon the disposal of children and Christian institution requires and commends namely Parents as God hath blessed them should lay up for their children (h) 2 Cor. 12 4. yea so as that when they are placed in Callings and married they may by some stock or competent portion be able to lay up for themselves and be really serviceable to God's glory and others welfare with their substance (i) Prov. 3 9. 29.3 Abraham is commended for this devising of his Estate and so Jacob in providing for his (k) Gen. 24.36 25.5 6. 30.30 God did under the Law direct to a double portion real or personal unto the eldest as an acknowledgment of the right of primogeniture supposing no manifest forfeiture by disobedience (l) Deut. 21.16 17. 1 Chron. 5.2 Gen. 49.3 Exod. 13.2 Lev. 27.26 For in the exercise of Parental authority there may be some special consideration and rational regards had to the most dutiful but still according to equity Daughters according to that constitution were to be copartners and share as coheirs in the inheritance (m) Numb 36.8 And how Parents without valuable reasons can now disinherit them considering the prohibition in my Text is not easie to conceive But in laying up for and appòrtioning their children Parents should have a care 1. That they be not delatory as those who unseasonably put off the supplies of their children with that God hath given them till they themselves be dead or so long till it hath occasion'd an abatement of affections in their Children which is not to be excus'd in them but the Parents should not tempt them or put them upon any sharking tricks to supply necessities by keeping all the patrimony in their own hands above an handsome reserve of conveniencies for their own food and rayment Being of a different temper from that Prince's Father †Guaz Civ Conv p. 390. Psal 119.60 who coming into his son's Closet and seeing there all the gold and silver plate he had a long time before given to him said I see you have not a generous mind enough for with all the gifts you had from me you have not known hitherto how to make your self one friend Or in any other respect by any avaritious detention of what is requisite to be bestowed on their Children lay them under the discouragement which Parents are in my Text obliged to avoid as that which is displeasing to God 2. They should be sure they came honestly by the portions they leave their Children that they are goods well gotten and well used For if they be treasures of iniquity they will not long abide (n) Prov. 10.2 Jos 7.24 having a curse attending them yea a little ill gotten will be as a little leaven that will sour the whole lump or as the coal which the Eagle carried with the flesh she took from the Altar that fired all but if they are well-gotten then as one said of a small portion they will wear like steel And though
they have been justly gain'd yet if they have been niggardly hoarded up and not put to good uses but Parents have liv'd miserably and basely only to increase riches they will prove not good but rusty though lawful money and they are kept to their owners disquiet and hurt and to their Childrens disappointment (o) Eccles 5.12 13. in the proof after an age likely they find nothing or nothing with the blessing of God (p) Prov. 10.22 16.8 for that is entailed not on the Miser's seed but on his that is all the day merciful (q) 20.7 Psal 37.26 when either the urgent necessities of the poor or the interest of the Church and State require a proportion to the defrauding of which under a pretext of raising a portion for Children were to cause a canker in what is rais'd Thus of Parents office whiles there be promising hopes of staying with their Children upon earth There remains somewhat yet 3. At their departure when they are admonish'd to be thoughtful of leaving them and have some prenotices of death approaching to arrest and carry them to their long home then Parents should set their house in order (r) 2 Kings 20.1 by giving or leaving such lessons of wisdom to their Children as by God's blessing will make a deeper impression being utter'd by dying persons (s) Gen. 15.16 Thus did Isaac and Jacob (t) 28.2.3 4. 49.1 2. 'T is true there was something of an extraordinary Prophetick spirit in some of them but those things of ordinary use which they gave in charge will be sufficient proof for our purpose as Isaac's sending Jacob to Laban with his blessing David's advice to Solomon (u) 1 Chron. 29.9 1 Kings 2.2 3 c. and Jacob's about his funeral (w) Gen. 50.16 and others making a Will or Testament bequeathing and devising their Estate (x) 25.5 with Gal. 3.15 Lev. 25.23 1 Kings 21.3 Hebr. 9 16 17. seconding all with solemn parental warnings and prayer to God for a blessing (y) Gen. 28.3 24.60 48.15 1 Chron. 29.19 and advising them after their their death to consult such friends upon emergencies whom they have oblig'd to their assistance as David did (z) 22.17 28.2 The Reverend Mr. Robert Bolton * In his life and others gave notable instances of this last duty The above mention'd Dr. Robert Harris refer'd his dear Wife and Children after several Heavenly and savoury speeches to the advice and counsel he had annex'd to his Will made by him about 22 years before his departure Therein he left his Children excellent instructions for their Souls their Bodies their Callings both as to the choice and use of them for their company for their marriages for their Children for themselves within themselves for their Estates and for the Publick Things really worth the reading and observing both by Parents and Children In imitation of which but not publish'd I have likewise with delight read very good advice left by a serious Citizen †Mr. R. B. May 9. 1662. Mr. T. H. as it should appear lying sick of a Consumption whereof he died to be given to his only Son and Child then a little one when he should come to the use of his reason which I doubt not but is faithfully performed by his Executor It might be of great advantage to their posterity if Parents would have more regard in due circumstances to this last office of theirs which is much sleighted by many in our days who seem unconcern'd what shall become of their posterity when they are gone as to the best of enjoyments 'T is true there be on another hand Parents over solicitous to leave great Estates to their Children when they themselves leave the world being loth to part with them before they think they can never make their Children rich enough in the world without any regard to the riches of grace never considering that conveniencie is really more eligible than abundance (a) Prov. 30.8 and where there is much wealth more grace and wisdom are needful to enjoy it well For if Children have not their hearts established with grace (b) Hebr. 13.9 or want prudence to manage an Estate they are but like a Ship that hath more sail than ballast which is ready to be overset with any gust of vvind A great Estate vvithout Vertue is but strong poyson vvithout an antidote and earthly minded Parents in this respect do vvith their Children as the Ostrich vvith her Eggs leaves them in the dust but takes no further care of them so they leave them rich in temporals but for their spiritual and eternal vvelfare they are little or nothing concern'd That they may eat drink be merry and cloth'd vvith the best they provide by setting their nest high and making their seed great on the earth (c) Hab 2.9 10. vvhen alas they do but consult shame to their house and vvrong their own souls They do but observe lying vanities and forsake their own mercies (d) Jon. 2.8 sith God usually turns the vvheel and disappoints them vvhen the riches of the sinner are laid up for the just (e) Prov. 13.22 Others become Masters of their Childrens Estate vvhereas the good man leaveth an inheritance to his childrens children vvho in after ages reap the benefit of an Estate consecrated and blessed by their pious Parents prayers the gracious answer vvhereunto they are still receiving 'T is more then time I should speak to 2. The enforcement of these great and important offices mention'd in my Text vvhich is the Father of Heaven's prohibition of provocation to the discouragement of children Provoke not your children 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 that they be not discouraged Now as I shew'd the positive injunction of the Lord vvas a sufficient Reason to enforce the duties of children so this inhibition or negative precept is of equal strength to move Parents unto theirs sith it plainly shews the Will of him who hath an uncontrollable dominion that Parents conduct should be moderated according to those equitable positive as well as negative pr cepts that have been produced in the enumeration of the foregoing particulars And the special one in my Text carries with it a reason drawn from the end lest the Children should be consumed with sorrows saith the Syriack version others lest they become pusillanimous and dispirited pining away with grief which may be by any neglect or abuse of parental authority either in defect or excess by omitting the duties required or committing what God hath inhibited and so falling into either extremes Now what can be more cogent with affectionate Parents to engage them unto the good government of those God hath put into subjection to them than a care they be not dishearten'd by any male-administration of theirs Certainly to give any just occasion of discouragement to the hopeful fruit of their own body must needs be very evil and unnatural this puts them in 〈◊〉 〈◊〉
〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 either such a stupid dejection of spirit as makes them fearful dull and unfit for any work so that they are like members stupified with narcoticks or such strong dolours of mind as even break their hearts which bring diseases and immature death or else as a sad and usual consequent a certain desperate contumacie when they find themselves under an incapacity through their Parents unusual indulgence or serenity of doing that which is right or of pleasing in their Relation they take the wretched boldness of doing wrong and displeasing yea many times they become like restive colts and winsing jades which fling and kick they do all the mischief they can and make head often times to irritate their Parents passions which is the height of impiety in Children who when come to this seldom take up till they have destroy'd them from whom they descended and ruin'd themselves soul and body 'T is most plain if God hath graciously given children unto his servants (f) Gen. 33.5 you Christian Parents who profess to be such are oblig'd in gratitude to his Heavenly Majesty for those favors to do your utmost so to order and manage these his gifts as he hath directed that they may indeed be fitted for the Donor's use and service They are not born with Bibles in their hands neither are the contents in their heads or hearts neither can they put forth to Sea without Card or Compass but you are by your Relation oblig'd to indoctrinate them to acquaint them with God and themselves to supply their wants as you can every way and no way to discountenance them for this is in effect to disparage the Divine favours and trample upon the Almighty's blessings 'T is to expose the tokens of his bounty and put them to the vilest uses (g) Lev. 19 29. Judges 19.23 24. to make them instruments of sin and subjects of wrath and bring shame to your selves (h) Gen. 19.8 33.34 Believe it Parents to neglect the Duties I have been insisting on is to throw away your crown and glory (i) Prov. 17.6 to pull down the stars in your own orb (k) Gen. 37.9 10. to despoil your own heritage and burn up the olive plants about your own table to unfeather the arrows in your own quiver (l) Psal 127.4 5. to cast into the rubbish the polish'd stones of your own Palace (m) 144.22 to rob your selves of that should give you rest and bereave your own souls of delight (n) Prov. 29.17 nay 't is to rob God for your Children are more his than your own they stand in a Foederal Relation unto him and you may not carry your selves towards them as you list (o) Ezek. 16.20 21. with Mat. 28.19 So that your own interest in them who are part of your selves your interest in their vertues God's interest in them as well as his will and pleasure should forcibly impel you to mind your office and fill up your Relation the unconscionable neglect of which will be as a bloody Dagger stuck up to the hilt in your own hearts Wherefore I beseech you endeavour all you can that your conduct of your Children be just and temperate with all gravity and prudence that it may be like the Childrens obedience which the Scripture calls for well-pleasing to the Lord so as they you your selves likewise may expect a blessed prolongation of your days (p) Deut. 32.46 47. I have at length dispathc'd vvhat I intend to say concerning the Duties themselves yet there remains something to be said to the III. General propos'd in Answer to the Complex Query viz. The manner or means of managing the duties of both Relations and this both more Generally and Particularly according to the mind of God in his Word 1. More Generally wherein that hath been already implicitly at least suggested which now will require only a brief intimation My Beloved Many we know are apt to be solicitous enough and too much as to their conversation in this world to observe the modes which obtain most at the Court It concerns us all certainly much more Children and Parents to discharge their duties after that mode which gains approbation in the Court of Heaven and therefore to take good heed to those helps for their direction concerning the manner of performance which we have in the Evangelical Institutes recorded in his Heavenly Majestie 's Imperial Court Therein both the Relatives are taught to perform the Duties I have been discoursing of from a principle of mutual love with a design to please God and comfort each other respectively in such a way as may adorn the Gospel (q) Col. 3.20 with Eph. 6.1 Phil. 1.27 Tit. 2 10. and maintain that charity which in this Relation should eminently proceed out of a pure heart and of a good conscience and faith unfeigned (r) 1 Tim. 15. This charity or love the Apostle tells us in this Chapter a little before my Text (s) Col. 3.14 Mat. 17.15 is the bond of perfectness or perfect bond and here if any where it is to meet at both ends yea bud forth and flourish in reciprocal delights and endearments (t) Gen. 45.10 46.29 30. Ez k. 24.25 Luke 15.20 22 32. Christian Parents and Children as much as may be should still be joyning in consort to keep up a mutual harmony yea and upon better principles endeavour to equal the most refined Moralists celebrated for this charity as Pomponius Atticus and his Mother who never fell out in sixty seven years as he himself tells the story To promote this there should be a free and frequent communication of secrets a giving and taking of loving warnings yea Parents in some circumstances should be willing to hearken to the submissive and prudent good advice of their children (u) 1 Sam. 19 6. Gen 11.31 with 12.1 Jos 24.2 and in a daily address to the Throne of grace a mutual pleading in faith the Covenant and Promises for each others interests (w) 2 Chron. 1.9 10 11 Psal 86.16 Rom. 9.3 10.1 Thus more generally 2. More Particularly some things may be said to the management of these duties according to Scripture still following the method of my Text severally to Children then to Parents 1. To Children such Directions as these following may be profitable for the well management of their duties viz. 1. Be throughly sensible of the mischief of disobedience and the benefit of obedience and therefore really believe the severe punishment of the former and the gracious rewards of the latter Be sure so much as there is of disobedience so much is wanting in some kind of natural affection and that usually hath monstrous attendants which direful judgments follow (x) Rom. 2.28 c. 2 Tim. 3.2 Deut. 21.20 21. Lev 20.9 Exod 21.17 Deut. 27.16 c. On the other side obedience qualifies for the best society and entitles to the promises here is the special
or froward (w) Luke 2.51 1 Pet. 2 18. in all that is well-pleasing to God whose honour is the end ingenuous Children should aim at by just and honest means in the exercise of their duties keeping themselves from their iniquities (x) 1 Tim 5.22 i. e. those which their own turbulent passions are apt to hurry them into If we did more reverence our selves we should carry better towards our Superiours Pythagoras his advice is very wholsom * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Carmin Let a man be the greatest shame to himself keep his own heart in awe by a secret blush upon his own extravagancies in their first risings and so he will have his Keeper every where with him then as he saith further Let him follow that which is just not only in words but in deeds He that is duly affected with shame of himself will be careful to pay just respects in all due circumstances unto those he is mostly oblig'd to honour 4. Set about all your duties to your Parents willingly and readily not with grudging or disdain but with an holy warmth of heart lifting up your selves to and following hard after whatever God requires (y) Judges 5.39 in all affectionate expressions of a free and chearful spirit sith all is to be in the Lord who loves readiness (z) 2 Cor. 9.7 This manner of performance will be the more easie if Children timely learn the great lesson of self-denial and do really exercise that and love they will then without bogling go through the most unpleasant uneasie and mean imployments they are call'd unto and concern'd to manage for their Parents as Jacob's Sons did for their Father after as well as before their marriage (a) Gen. 30.35 37.13 14. 42.1 2 3. 43.15 47.1 2 3. and in his straits Judah express'd great readiness to comfort his Father (b) 44.33 34 with 30. Ruth as was noted before was very exemplary in this manner of obedience (c) Ruth 1.15 16. but Isaac's readiness was the most singular (d) Gen. 22.9 10. till Christ himself whom he typified came then saith he to his Father (e) Psal 40.8 Ad semper velle non ad semper agere I delight to do thy will O my God thy Law is within my heart Believe it Willingness puts a great acceptableness upon duties Children are bound always to will though not always to act they should readily embrace all opportunities 'T is said Amasiah the Son of Zichri willingly offer'd himself unto the Lord (f) 2 Chron. 17.16 and so should ingenuous Children be ever ready as Paul was in Christ (g) Acts 21.13 for their Parents service Somewhat of this was hinted before and I shall only add what Hierocles saith in this case * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 c. in Pythag. Carm. p. 54 57 mihi It is fit we should not withdraw our selves from performing with our own hands what our Parents require as occasion serves but by how much the more mean and servile the offices by so much should Children think them the more honest and laudable and not to he avoided because expensive but to be done with a ready and chearful mind for their use and with joy we are put to those pains and expences for their sakes 5. Persevere in all and be constant with diligence unto the end whatever temptations you meet with Let not the instructions you have received according to godliness depart from your heart all the days of your life (h) Deut. 4.9 Be not fickle or inconstant but hold out in all circumstances though your Parents be aged and decay'd (i) Prov. 23.22 Ru h 1.15 16. 4.15 so long as they and you coexist in this world and the Relation remains Be like constant Ruth and holy Joseph when advanc'd he continued his obedience to the very last moment of his dear Father's life and after (k) Gen. 46.29 47.31 48.12 a vertue wherein it seems Samuel's sons were defective (l) 1 Sam 8.5 but Jonadab's were praise-worthy (m) Jer. 35.56 as well as others after their Parents decease when tempted to the contrary yea though it was in a business unpleasing to flesh and blood They did as Physicians prescribe to their Patients receive their Father's documents cum debitâ custodiâ so as not to indulge their appetites in that he forbad them but persevere in observing his injunction This is praise-worthy Nay though our Parents should not submit to the yoke of Christ we should not withdraw our neck from their yoke nor desist from obedience to them so far as it hinders not our obedience to Christ but should hold out that none take our Crown As Antonius said †〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Lib. 8. Sect. 5. Remember well you ought to be a good man and that which the nature of man requires of you this do constantly So that which the Nature of your Relation calls for do it with all your might and never suffer your self to be diverted or recalled from it Having found the true way of obedience go on in it and be not turned back again remembring vvhat our blessed Lord and Master saith He that shall endure to the end the same shall be saved (n) Mat. 24 13. After these Particulars to Children I must crave leave before I shut up 2. To say somewhat in particular unto Parents to direct and help them likewise to manage their office in an evangelical manner 1. Be sure that you your selves do keep up the life and power of godliness in your own domestick practise that hereby your children may be kept from corruption in a bad air and encourag'd in an holy conversation I have already hinted something of this concerning the exemplariness of Parents and in the premis'd general duty of their good behaviour and therefore shall not need to enlarge much upon it here Only suggest this that you are to walk in your integrity as for your own so for your posteritie's comfort in the family exercise of Religion by behaving your self wisely in an upright way and walking within your house with an upright heart (o) Psal 101 2. 112.2 Prov. 20.7 shewing your selves in all things patterns of good works (p) Tit. 2.7 And putting persons and things into their proper places to prevent confusion which else will arise and much obstruct you in your most important offices This will gain a reputation to your Government and facilitate the management of particular duties When your children see what a gloss you put upon holiness by your sincere chearful and grave Christian deportment they begin to discern the pleasantness of the ways of wisdom the excellency of the life of faith and the odiousness of flesh-pleasing courses and so come to esteem your instructions which are very legible and easie to be understood by such a practical commentary The holy life of John the Baptist had some influence upon Herod's affections for
Martyrs William Hunter's Mother cheared up her son in that great duty of bearing testimony to Jesus Christ saying William I think thee as well bestow'd as ever any child that I bare in my womb Thus Jacob did in an holy wile get as it were into Joseph's heart by insinuating the special kindness he had for his dear Rachel Joseph's Mother (i) Gen 48.7 If you gain your Childrens hearts then they will give ear to you so as to observe what you would have done (k) Prov. 23.26 Hence it is that our Heavenly Father in Scripture is so abundant in satisfying us of his love (l) 3.12 Deut. 8.3 4 5. that he may gain our hearts and affections Your converse then with your children in all parental offices should in all decent manner be still expressive of love thus much is peculiarly imply'd in my Text which inhibits discouragement From love and tender bowels (m) Phil. 1.8 if tears or compassionate expressions be mingled with instructions this will help much to win and commend Children unto goodness Suitable gifts and rewards prudently and seasonably bestow'd will allure them Upon which account it is that Tertullian * Gratius est nomen pietatis quam potestatis etiam familiae magis Patres quam Domini vocantur Apol. c. 34. saith The name of Piety is more grateful than that of power yea they are called Fathers rather then Lords of the Family Hence also Pliny †l. 5. epist 19. was taken with a similitude of Homers ‖ 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 which he useth once and again to shew that a Prince should be moderate in his Government even as a Father is gentle in ruling of his Children So the People esteemed Joseph under Pharaoh when he had power in Aegypt when he procured such hearty obeysance (n) Gen. 41.43 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 that some render that word tender Father as in the Margent which in our Translation is bow the knee Certainly the great friendship betwixt Parents and Children requires all expressions of endearments as in the tongue of the prudent woman there should ever be the law of kindness (o) Prov. 31.26 For as Maximus Tyrius * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 c. Dissert 36. observes in another case so here If once the power of friendship be enervated there is nothing but it may easily move Relatives to anger and disturb them even as by taking the rudder from a Ship it is very soon tossed any way And here I think it very advisable that Parents who have their infirmities should encourage their honest Children by giving a favourable ear unto their humble and discreet monitions and good advice for their honour and spiritual welfare even as Saul did being convicted with reason hearken unto the voice of Jonathan his son (p) 1 Sam. 19.6 And as Terah upon the discovery which his son Abraham did from the Lord make to him comply'd with his advice for the removing of himself and family (q) Gen. 11.31 with 12.1 4. Labour to carry it with all eavenness and impartiality to every child according to a rational proportion so that it may be evident you account all that descend from you dear or beloved Children as God himself doth his (r) Eph. 5.1 1 Pet. 1.3 Jam. 1.18 for you are really concern'd in all 'T is true you should very distinctly observe the different carriages of your Children towards God your self and others to approve vertue and disapprove vice but yet you are to cherish as near as may be an equal desire of doing them all good alike not hugging one and hunching another out of some partial respect or distorted apprehension A good Parent as one †Mr. Fuller ingeniously notes should observe a species of Gavelkind in dividing his affections to his children to prevent envying amongst them and if the expression thereof be different it should be with equity and discretion that they in their own consciences may plainly read the reasons of it Though there is no necessity to make an equal distribution of Estate wherein the right of Primogeniture may seem from Scripture (s) Gen. 37.4 49 3. Exod. 13 2. Deut. 21.15 16. 1 Chron. 5.2 as abovesaid to claim a greater proportion unless some kind of rebellion put in a demurrer For however a prudent Parent should like a well-drawn Picture cast an eye equally upon all his Children in point of affection yet when he makes a distribution of his Estate in point of justice it can be no disparagement to him to encourage the obedient with a reward when by an equitable abatement he may suffer the disobedient justly to feel the smart of his misbehaviour But yet he is concern'd to be indifferent and impartial the same to every child in the same circumstances It is I confess rare to find a Parent indeed of this excellent temper amongst the sons of men but a truly Christian Parent should strive to resemble God in it sith as every child came from his own substance so he is to give an equal account to God of all and therefore should labour to overcome sense with reason and in very deed exhibit himself upon a due expence of circumstances one and the same to all So that they who upon by and undue respects do prefer one child to another whiles led by a partial affection cannot manage parental duties in a manner well-pleasing to God 'T is said Scipio Africanus * Dignus commiseratione magis est cui natura faves minus was so affraid of being unkind to his child as too many are for a natural defect that he rather shew'd most affection to his Son that was a fool saying He was most worthy of commiseration whom nature did favour least 5. And last of all Advise with your faithful Pastors and spiritual Guides especially in more intricate circumstances yea and study well your office Which that you may perform acceptably 't is good also to get what assistance you can from others to help you in the management thereof As Manoah did not only seek the Lord but consulted the Angel concerning his Son Sampson how they should order him and how they should do unto him (t) Judges 13.8 12. so should Parents endeavour to inform themselves and get the best counsel they can from those God hath set over them in the ministration of ordinances (u) EPh. 4.11 12. sith now under the Gospel they are as spiritual Fathers appointed for the feeding of Christ's sheep and his lambs (w) Jo. 21.15.16 17. which are directed to find pasture by the shepherds tents (x) Cant. 1.7 8. Ezek. 47.8 9 10. Jer. 8.22 and there get waters and balm for healing Monica Augustin's Mother †August Conf. repair'd to them for aid to reduce her Son and indeed theirs is as John Baptist's Ministry was to bring all to rights betwixt Parents and Children according to the Prophet's prediction (z) Mal.
4 6. Mat. 17.12 He shall turn the hearts of the Fathers to the Children and the hearts of the Children to their Fathers lest I come and strike the earth with a curse Of so great advantage is the right and hearty discharge of these relative duties I have been treating on for the saving of Nations and particular Churches from ruin and desolation Yea and so greatly instrumental are the Ministers of Christ for helping them in their duties that it concerns honest Parents as to consult those who are holy and able in the Ministry for their Childrens good so to commend such faithful Ministers to them as are worthy of their respect and to warn their Children to avoid such persons as are likely to draw them off from goodness yea and particularly in disposing of their Children especially into a Calling of publique consequence 't will be very requisite to consult those who are most able to judge in their own profession as in Divinity Physick or Law that they may be tryed by the faithful and skilful of that profession whether qualified for that they are designed lest you attempt that which cannot be effected as Quintilian †Nè tentes quod effici non potest nâ—c ab eo quod quis eâ—timè facit in aliud cui nimis est idoneus cum transferas observes by putting them upon what they are unapt for or hinder them from that they have a genius to and wherein they would be most serviceable And it will be good to take advice in choosing sit Educators and Tutors according to your abilities David had such learned ones as Tutors with his Sons 1 Chron. 27.32 to see them instructed as became the Princes of Israel a But here Parents should be very careful unto whose conduct they commit their Children or whom they take in to assist them that they be religious orthodox discreet humble courteous skilful and not covetous nor careless but diligent 'T was the great concern of reverend Claviger to have those that feared God about him to do what he could his Wife and Children might be such and then he thought them well provided for Luther kept one within his house to teach his Children that he might see them well-principled and ordered as well as learned And the abovenamed Quintilian * Si quis in eligendo filii praeceptore manifesta flagitia non vitet jam hinc sciat caetera quoque quae ad utilitatem juventutis componere conamur esse sibi hac parte omissa supervacua l. 2. Inst c. 2. from Nature's light could say If any one in choosing a Tutor for his Son did not shun manifest wickedness hence let him know that other things also which we endeavour to compose for the profit of youth prove useless and ineffectual this being neglected This Constantius †Socrat. III. 1. Sozom. II. 2. was well aware of when he was solicitous his Cousin Julian should not have or hear Ethnic Tutors lest considering his temper he should decline to the abomination of Gentilism But notwithstanding his care Julian privately got the writings of Libanius an Heathen Philosopher and after that of Maximus who under-hand laboured to pervert him in hopes he would come to the Empire and to hide this instill'd poyson from Constantius Julian counterfeited for a time a monastick life then openly in pretence read the Bible but secretly studied in earnest the Ethnic Doctrines which made him a most bitter enemy to the Christians when advanc'd to the Empire as the ancient Church experienc'd 'T is dangerous to commit a Lamb to to the conduct of a Wolf On the other hand Theodosius junior ‖ Soz. l. IX 1. was from his Cradle by his dying Father entrusted with his excellent and pious Sister Pulcheria then but 15 years old and having two younger Sisters Arcadia and Marina who got him instructed by such Tutors especially in the true Religion accustoming him to prayer and diligently to frequent the Assemblies that he had in great esteem the faithful Ministers and other Godly men who were lovers of Religion and so prov'd very instrumental for the Orthodox Faith and the advancement of Piety In our own Land and nearer our times we have a notable instance of Sir John Cheek who being Tutor to King Edward the Sixth Dr. L. in Sir John Cheek 's Life was a special instrument of raising up and promoting the Reformed Religion amongst us for he was not only instrumental to sow the seeds of that Doctrine in the Prince's heart which afterwards grew up to a general Reformation when he came to be King but by his means the same saving truth was gently instill'd into the Lady Elizabeth by those who by his procurement were admitted to be the Guides of her younger studies It is of great concern therefore to get good advice and assistance in the education of Children and for their encouragement to reward those well who are profitably employ'd in this work according to the Parents abilities and their deserts and for my own part I should account it better to spare in other matters than in this for good assistance to train up Children Thus I have as I could in my circumstances dispatch'd what I propos'd and now I dare upon the whole matter affirm That I have laid down nothing in all this discourse but what I hope is at least for the main agreeable to the mind of God and what by his assistance I my self should desire and really endeavour to practise either in the relation of Parent or Child which is all the Apologie I shall make for my plain dealing But shall conclude with those precatory expressions in the Psalms a very little varied with respect to those Parents who heartily embrace the word of exhortation (b) Psal 90.16 17. Let thy work O Lord appear unto thy servants and thy glory unto their children And the beauty of the Lord our God be upon them (c) 144.2 that their sons may be as plants grown up in their youth that their daughters may be as corner-stones polish'd after the similitude of a Palace Considering what the Lord hath promis'd for the encouragement of his faithful servants (d) 102.28 viz. Their children shall continue and their seed shall be established before him Duties of Masters and Servants Serm. XVIII Ephes VI. 5 6 7 8 9. Servants be obedient to them that are your Masters according to the flesh with fear and trembling in singleness of your heart as unto Christ Not with eye-service as men pleasers but as the Servants of Christ doing the will of God from the heart With good will doing service as to the Lord and not to men Knowing that whatsoever good thing any man doth the same shall he receive of the Lord whether he be bond or free And ye Masters do the same things unto them forbearing threatning knowing that your Master also is in heaven neither is there respect of persons with him THE
Christianity calls for quietly and readily to resign up all our comforts to God's dispose Christian 't is a great part of thy religion to be content under these crosses not to have thy comforts ‖ Omnia ista nobis accedant non haereant ut si abducantur fine ullâ nostri lacetatione discedant Senec. Ep. 74. torn from thee as the plaister is from the flesh but to come off easily as the glove doth from the hand 5. Where there is ground of hope that the everlasting state of dead Relations is secured as there is for the Adult who lived in the fear of God for Children descending from Parents in covenant with God there 't is mere self-love which must cause discontent For had we true love to the dead we should rejoyce in their advancement as Christ saith Joh. 14.28 if ye loved me ye would rejoyce because I go to my Father You are troubled because they are not with you but you should joy in this that they are with Christ which is far better Phil. i. 21. 8. Think how others have undergone this tryal Aaron had his sons cut off by a dreadful Judgment but 't is said of him he held his peace Levit. 10.3 Job 1.21 2 Sam. 12.15 c. See Val. Max. l. 5. c. 10. So it was with Job and yet he blessed the Lord So long as there was hope of the life of the child David prayed and fasted but when he saw God's will was done he rose up and eat and afflicted himself no more Nay I might recite several examples of Heathens who did to the shame of us Christians bear the death of dear Relations with great equanimity and undisturbedness of spirit Well I hint these several things to you when any of you are thus tryed I allow you a due and regular grief and sense of God's afflicting hand but there must be no vexing or discontent under it which the Considering of the forementioned particulars may very much prevent or remove 3. Thirdly Wben Relations continued prove uncomfortable How as to uncomfortable Relations this occasions daily risings of heart and much discontent O the sad fires of passion which hereby are kindled in many too many hearts and houses The comfort of Relations is grounded upon suitableness where that is not the rose is turned into a briar or thorn What is unsuitable is uncomfortable as the yoke that doth not suit or fit the neck is alwaies uneasie Now this unsuitableness refers either to the natural temper or to something of an higher nature in both 't is very afflictive but especially in the latter There is an unsuitableness in respect of the natural temper or disposition I intend in this principally Husband and Wife the one is loving mild gentle of an even and calm spirit sweet and obliging in his or her converse the other is quite contrary froward passionate cholerick hard to be pleased alwayes quarelling c. Here 's a cross now and a heavy cross too but what 's to be done by them that bear it so as that they may learn Contentment under it why let them be often in considering these things 1. That God hath a special hand in this affliction 'T is he who brings persons together in this relation he made the match in Heaven before it was made on earth and therefore he is to be eyed in all the Consequences that attend it if it be comfort he is to be blessed for it if it be discomfort he is to be submitted to under it 2. Though this be a sharp tryal yet 't is for good where it 's sanctified It drives many nearer to God weans them more from the world keeps them humble draws out their graces gives them experience of supporting mercy learns them to be more pitiful to others and the like 3. May be this is the only affliction with which some are exercised In all things else 't is mercy only in this thing God sees it good to afflict surely such have little reason to be discontented What under such variety of signal mercies canst thou not bear contentedly one signal affliction 4. The Cross is heavy but patience and contentedness will make it lighter Levius fit patientiâ quod corrigere est nefas The more the Beast strives the more the yoke pinches the more quiet he is the less it hurts him and so it is in that Case which I am upon 5. Possibly more suitable Relations were once enjoyed but forfeited So that if you will be angry it must be with your selves not with God 6. Death will soon put an end to this Cross and we shall shortly be in that state wherein we shall have nothing unsuitable to us But 2. There is an unsuitableness in higher things such as do more immediately concern the honour of God and the everlasting condition of Souls as Grace and no Grace Holiness and sin Godliness and Vngodliness Here now I principally intend Parents and Children though other Relations may be included also Here is a Parent that fears God that lives an holy and godly life that owns the good wayes of God and walks in them c. But his Child or Children are of a quite other Spirit and take a quite other course oh they live in sin and wickedness in open enmity to God carrying it as the Sons of Belial they curse swear drink defile their bodies profane Sabbaths neglect duties scoff at Godliness puff at all good counsel discover a Spirit obstinately set against God c. This is an affliction of a very great stature taller by the head and shoulders than several that have been spoken unto before yet many godly Parents groan under it whose head and hearts are broken by ungodly Children and never was this affliction more common than now when youth is so much debauched I verily believe many good Parents could with much less grief bear the death of their Sons were they but fit for it than that which they daily undergoe through the wickedness of their lives Truly these are much to be pitied yet I would desire them to labour to be contented and submissively to bear this heavy cross In order to which frame let them consider 1. That 't is no new thing for good Parents to have bad Children Sometimes it so happens that when the Father is bad the Son is good but it more frequently happens and God suffers it to be so that the world may see Grace doth not run in a blood that when the Father is good the Son is bad It hath been so from the beginning Adam had his Cain Noah his Cham Abraham his Ismael Isaac his Esau David his Amnon and so in many others and it will be so to the end of the world Pray think of this though 't is a cutting yet but common affliction 2. Children are ungodly yet there is hope at last they may be reclaimed As stubborn as they are God can make them yield he can change
and no necessary Grace shall be wanting unto you Look that you be patient in waiting and patient in bearing Do not misinterpret God's dealings with you There are two passages I would have you take special notice of that Ground that brought such Fruit as answer'd expectation (d) Luk. 8.15 was an honest and good heart which kept the Word and brought forth fruit with patience The other is in your patience possess your souls patience contributes much to both Fruitfulness and Comfort Let 's make an Essay Thou would'st have God manifest his Love to thee in a more ravishing manner stay a while thou wantest another kind of dispensation first and most viz. to feel more of the evil of sin that thou mayst be more watchful and more holy So soon as a tryal comes thou wouldst have it remov'd stay a while it hath not done the work for which God sent it God in kindness binds on the Plaister till he hath effected the Cure Thou art at a loss thou knowest not what God will doe with thee be it so it is not fit thou shouldest God doth not use to tell his Children before-hand what he will do with them God expects we should gather up our Duty from the Precepts of his Word and from the hints of his Providence We read (e) 2 King 13.17 18 19. that when the Prophet Elisha had given King Joash a Promise and a sign of deliverance from Syria God expected that his own reason and faith should prompt him so to improve a second sign as to pursue the victory to a conquest but he understood it not and so miscarryed Do you learn to hold on in the use of all Means for the engaging of your hearts more to God We (f) Heb. 6.11.12 13. desire that every one of you do shew the same diligence to the full Assurance of Hope unto the end that you be not sloathful but followers of them who through Faith and Patience inherit the Promises Not expecting to obtain the Promise till you have patiently endured and the same Apostle in the same Epistle tells us (g) Heb. 10.36 that you have need of patience that after you have done the will of God you might receive the Promise Thus much for the inward Means of loving God Outward Means for engaging our Hearts to love God are either Directing or Exemplary I. Directing The onely directing Means is the Word of God but seeing you shall in the following Sermons have particular directions about both Hearing and Reading of the Word I shall only hint these few things 1. Prize the Word Though our estimation of it will be exceedingly heightned by a further acquaintance with it yet you will find it singularly advantagious to the enflaming of your hearts to get your hearts as it were graciously forestalled with the valuation of the Word When we can count the Word sweeter than Honey to the taste better than Gold for a treasure more necessary than Food for our sustenance (i) Job 23.12 how can the Soul choose but love God whose love indited it Shall filthy books provoke carnal love and shall not the Book of God provoke Divine love endeavour to get but as spiritual a sence and relish of Divine Truths answerable to mens carnal gusts and feeling of other things do but dwell upon Truths till they affect you Only here observe this necessary Caution Dwell not so upon difficulties as to hinder your further enquiry into things more easily understood but wait in a course of diligence and you will be able to master those difficulties which 't is next to impossible suddainly to fathom Do but steer an even course between a careless neglect and an anxious perplexity about what you read or hear and you will certainly attain a deep knowledge of the things of God and a high measure of love to God 2. Set immediately upon the practice of those things which you shall be convinced to be your Duty Let not your Affections cool upon any duty pressed upon you Do something like that of (k) Dan. 2.8 c. Nebuchadnezzar God revealed to him something of moment he had lost the matter and understood not the meaning but was as others thought unreasonably importunate to recover both and that presently before the impression wore off and the heat went over So my brethren fix the Word by speedy practice Though the seed of the Word is long in growing to perfection yet it presently takes root in order to growth Were I therefore now exhorting you to Repentance and could bring you to no nearer a resolution than to repent to morrow my Exhortation were lost So now while I press you to love God and demonstrate from Scripture that it is your Duty offer you Scripture-helps that may be effectual provoke you with Scripture encouragements that may be overcoming if you now put off all this till a fitter time 't is a thousand to one you put it off for ever Read this over again and then think why should not I now believe this and how can I say I now believe it if I do not now put it in practice and how can I say I practise it if I omit any one Direction II. Exemplary Means And here I shall give you as short a touch as may be of Men Angels and Christ himself We are much drawn by Examples Examples they are not only Arguments but Wings They give us a demonstration that Precepts are practicable 1. Men. Why should not we love God as well as ever Abraham did God gives the word (k) Gen. 22 2.3 Abraham take now thy Son thy only Son Isaac whom thou lovest and offer him for a burnt-offering And Abraham rose up early in the morning c. Had he not loved God so far as the Creature can love God infinitely every word would have been as a dagger to his heart q. d. Abraham I gave thee that Name from thy being a Father of many People but now be thou the death of that seed which I intended to multiply God seemed to change his Name to Abraham as Solomon named his Son Rehoboam an Enlarger of the People who enlarged them from twelve tribes to two Take now no time to demur upon it Thy Son so many years prayed for and waited for Thine onely Son all the rest of thy children are not worth thy owning Isaac the Son of thy Laughter now the Son of thy Sorrow Whom thou lovest more than ever Father loved a child and that upon several justifiable accounts And get thee into the land of Moriah though no time to deliberate before thou resolvest yet time enough for repentance before thou executest thy resolutions And offer him there for a burnt-offering 't is not enough to give him up to be sacrificed by another but thou thy self must be the Priest to kill thy lovely child and then to burn him to ashes And Abraham rose up early c. he quarrels not with God What
This is Christ's counsel Cast out the beam out of thine own eye then shalt thou see clearly to pull out the mote out of thy Brother's eye Math. 7.5 Mine eye is not capable of having a beam in it but a mote in mine own eye should be to me as a beam in comparison of what it is in anothers Take a few Scripture instances for this had need to be inculcated in the present age in case of dishonour done to God and your selves compare Moses his carriage (g) Numb 12.2 Miriam and Aaron spake against Moses Hath the Lord indeed spoken only by Moses hath he not spoken also by us and the Lord heard it but Moses was as if he heard it not for he was very meek above all men that were upon the face of the earth He was so indeed but it was only in his own cause when the glory of God is concerned you 'l find him of another temper As soon as he saw the Calf and the Dancing Moses's anger waxed hot and he took the calf which they had made and burned it in the fire and ground it to powder Exod. 32.19 20 22 27. and strewed it upon the water and made the Children of Israel drink of it And Moses stood up in the gate of the Camp and said who is on the Lord's s de let him come unto me and he said put every man his Sword by his side and go in and out from gate to gate throughout the camp and slay every man his brother and every man his companion and every man his neighbour c. Here is one ice-cold in his own cause fire-hot in God's Take another instance of Paul (h) Gal. 4.12 Brethren I beseech you be as I am for I am as ye are you have not injured me at all q d. the wrong you have done me I count as nothing but to Elimas that would hinder the entertainment of the Gospel he saith thou Child of the Devil thou Enemy of all Righteousness Acts 13.10 c. and he strikes him blind I instance in these now because I mentioned them before as singularly eminent for their love to God For Zeal about duties I commend unto you this rule In every duty you take in hand endeavour to do it above your strength not only to the uttermost of your strength but above it I bottom this rule upon the commendation given to the Churches of Macedonia (i) 2 Cor. 8.3 For to their power I bear record yea and beyond their power they were willing of themselves My Brethren It becomes us in every thing of Piety to pant after the utmost perfection attainable (k) Phil. 3.12 13 14. Not as though I were already perfect but I labour after forgetting those things that are behind reaching forth to those things which are before c. And David saith (l) Psal 69.9 The zeal of thine house hath eaten me up In a word we must not only be sometimes zealous under pangs of Conscience but always in the whole frame of our conversation (m) Gal. 4.18 It is good to be zealously affected always in a good thing and not only when a Minister or some other is present who may commend you The last thing I first proposed was to urge some perswasives to be graciously ambitious of such qualifications and as graciously diligent in such exercises And here I must pass by more arguments than I can so much as mention For the truth is you can name nothing in the world but it may be an Argument to promote our love to God 1. Consider God is our great Benefactour I mention this twice that it may be often in your thoughts Who can reckon up the benefits we receive from God If love be to be recompenc'd with love greater love was never shown than this that God hath given his Son to dye for his Enemies If love be to be purchas'd at any rate who can give more for it than eternal life If love be to be bestowed gratis who more worthy of it than God and canst thou then do less than love him It is commended as an expedient to overcome the worst of our enemies (p) Rom. 12.20 If thine enemy hunger feed him if he thirst give him drink for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head Oh what hearts have we that mercies will not melt them Reflect a little upon your selves we use to indent with little Children for their love if we give them but an apple or a plumb we presently ask will you love me and if they promise to love us we then enquire where will you love me Oh dear Christians turn in upon your own hearts a little O how many how great mercies do you receive from God (q) Prov. 17 8. Solomon tells us that a gift whithersoever it turneth it prospereth shall God's gifts be the only exception to that Proverbial Maxime For shame Christians let us strive who shall be first in crying O come let us worship and bow down let us kneel before the Lord our Maker (r) Psal 95.6 Know ye that the Lord is God (s) Psal 100.3 It is he that made us and not we our selves we are his People and the sheep of his pasture (t) Psal 31.23 O love the Lord all ye his Saints for the Lord preserveth the faithful God is pleased to give us in actual possession of what his wise love thinks fittest for us and God is pleased to give us promises suitable to every condition we can be in in this world e. g. In case of want (u) Mat. 6.31 32 33. Take no thought saying what shall we eat or what shall we drink or wherewith shall we be cloathed surely if we may be sollicitous about any worldly concern it is about food and raiment but Christ chargeth us upon our Christianity not to be thoughtful about them For after all these things do the Gentiles seek But if we do not take care for food and raiment we may starve Christ doth as it were say nay there 's no danger of that for your heavenly Father knoweth that you have need of all these things Were this believed men would lay aside their Callings No warrant for that Christ layeth down a rule for our practice as the condition of the promise Seek ye first not onely but first the Kingdom of God and his Righteousness and then in a way of diligence not negligence all these things shall be added to you This in respect of want Take another in case of danger The name of the Lord is a (w) Prov. 18.10 strong Tower the Righteous runneth into it and is safe O how safe is that person that is as it were garrison'd in the divine Attributes in case of suffering (x) Mark 10.29 30. Verily I say unto you there 's no man that hath left house or brethren or sisters or father or mother or wife or
God 3. Odes or spiritual Songs may belong to natural things what we ought to debate discuss viz. The Race Order Harmony and Continuance of the World and God's infinite Wisdom manifested in it 2. Some distinguish these according to the Authors of them 1. Psalms they are the Composures of holy David 2. Hymns they are the Songs of some other excellent men recorded in Scripture as Moses Heman Asaph c. 3. Spiritual Songs they are Odes of some other holy and good men not mentioned in Scripture as the Song of Ambrose Nepos and others 3. Some aver that these several speeches mentioned in the Text answer the Hebrew distinction of Psalms Among them there were 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Mizmorim which treated of various and different Subjects 2. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 which only mentioned the Praises of the most High 3. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 which were Songs more artificially and musically composed and some Divines observe were sung with the help of a musical Instrument But I may add Are not all these several species mentioned to prefigure the Plenty and the Joy which is reserved for the Saints within the Vail when they shall join in consort with the glorious Angels in singing their perpetual Hallelujahs to their glorious Creator 3 The manner of Singing Our Text saith with Melody with inward joy and tripudlation of Soul If the Tongue make the Pause the Heart must make the Elevation The Apostle saith to the Colossians Colos 3.16 We must sing with grace which is as some expound it 1. Cum gratiarum actione with giving of thanks And indeed thankfulness is the very Selah of this duty that which puts an accent upon the Musick and sweetness of the Voice and then we sing melodiously when we warble out the Praises of the Lord. 2. With gracefulness with a becoming and graceful dexterity And this brings both profit and pleasure to the Hearers as Davenant observes Psalms are not the Comedies of Venus or the jocular Celebrations of a wanton Adonis but they are the Spiritual ebullitions of a composed Soul to the incomprehensible Jehovah with real grace God's Spirit must breathe in this service Et prodessâ— veliat dâ—lectâ—re Dav. Cantemus cum gratia à Spiriâ—u Sâ—ncto donata Chrysost Hoc quod praecinitur sine gratià Dâ—i impleri non potest Oecâ—m Sine corde nulla est modalatio Bod. here we must act our joy our confidence our delight Singing is the triumph of a gracious Soul the Child joying in the praises of his Father In singing of Psalms the gracious heart takes wings and mounts up to God to joyn with the Celestial Quire It is grace which sits the heart for and sweetens the heart in this duty And where this qualification is wanting this service is rather an hurry than a duty it is rather a disturbance than any obedience 4. The Master of the Chore the Preceptor that is the Heart We must look to the Heart in singing that it be purged by the Spirit and that it be replete with spiritual Affection He plays the Hypocrite who brings not the heart to this Duty One observes There is no Tune without the Heart Singing takes its proper rise from the Heart the Voice is only the further progress And indeed God is the Creator of the whole man and therefore he will be praised not only with our Tongues but with our Hearts The Apostle tells us He will sing with the spirit 1 Cor. 14.15 And David informs us his heart was ready to sing and give praise Nâ—n vox sed votum non musica cerdula sed cor Aug. De modo benè vivendi Bern. Psal 57.7 8. 108.1 Augustine admonisheth us It is not a Musical-string but a Working-heart is harmonious The Virgin Mary sings her Magnificat with her heart Luke 14.47 And Bernard tells us in a Tract of his That when we sing Psalms let us take heed that we have the same thing in our Mind that we warble forth in our Tongue and that our Song and our Heart do not run several ways If we in singing only offer the Calves of our Lips it will too much resemble a Carnal and a Jewish service 5. The End of the Duty To the Lord. So saith the Text viz. To Jesus Christ who is here principally meant Our singing must not serve our Gain or our Luxury or our Fancy but our Christ our Lord and dear Redeemer In this Duty it is his Praises we must mainly and chiefly celebrate And most deservedly we magnifie the true God by Psalms and Singing when the Heathens celebrate their false and dung-hill-Gods Jupiter Neptune and Apollo with Songs and Hymns One well observes Singing of Psalms is part of Divine Worship Deus est canendi Vnicus Scopus Bod. and of our Homage and Service due to the great Jehovah Bodius takes notice that God is the true and only scope of all our singing And truly if the Spirit of God be in us he will be steddily aimed at by us Thus Deborah and Barak sang their Triumphal Song to the Lord Judges 5.3 The several parts of the Text being thus opened they may be set together again in this Divine and Excellent Truth Doct. Non franges vocem sed frange voluntatem non serves tantùm Consonantiam Vocum sed concordium Mo um Bern. Aug. In the Ordinance of Singing we must not make Noise but Musick and the Heart must make Melody to the Lord. So the Text. Augustine complained of some in his time That they minded more the Tune than the Truth more the Manner than the Matter more the Governing of the Voice than the Raisedness of the Mind And this was a great offence to him Singing of Psalms must only be the joyous breathing of a raised Soul and here the cleanness of the Heart is more considerable than the clearness of the Voice In this Service we must study more to act the Christian than the Musitian Many in singing of Psalms are like the Organs whose Pipes are filled only with Wind. The Apostle Col. 3.16 tells us we must sing with our Heart We must sing David's Psalms with David's Spirit One tells us God is a Spirit and he will be worshipped in Spirit even in this duty Now to traverse the Truth 1. We will shew the Divine Authority of this Ordinance 2. We will shew the Sweetness of it 3. The Universal Practice of it 4. We shall shew the Honours God hath put upon this Ordinance 5. And then come to the main Case 6. And make Application For the first We shall shew the Divine Authority of this Ordinance 1. By Scripture-Command 2. By Scripture-Argument 3. By Scripture-Pattern 4. By Scripture-Prophesie 1. From Scripture-Precept And here we have divers commands laid upon us both in the Old and New Testament David who among his honourable Titles obtains this to be called the Sweet Singer of Israel 2 Sam. 23.1 he frequently calls upon himself Psal 7.17 I
Praise the Lord for his mercy endureth for ever And when they began to sing and to praise the Lord set ambushments against the Children of Ammon Moab and Mount Seir which came against Israel and they were smitten Israel's success follows Israel's singing If the people of Israel will look to their Duty God will look to their Enemy and lay that Ambush which shall ensnare and overthrow their power 3. With Evident Miracles This we find upon Record Acts 16.25 26. And at midnight Paul and Silas prayed and sang praises to God and the prisoners heard them and suddenly there was a great Earth-quake so that the Foundations of the prison were shaken and immediately the doors were opened and every ones hands were loosed Behold here an eminent Miracle Prisons saluting the Prisoner's Liberty Paul and Silas singing set God on working and if their Tongues were loosed in Duty their hands shall be loosed for Liberty Singing like praying can work wonders Lorinus observes Angelicà peculiari â—peâ—d Sâ—lâ—tio Vinculorum accidit Lorin Case that the prisoners Chains were taken off and their bands loosed by the peculiar power and work of Angels And now I come to the main Case How we may make melody in our hearts to God in Singing of Psalms Answ 1. We must sing with understanding We must not be guided by the Tune but the Words of the Psalm we must mind the Matter more than the Musick and consider what we sing as well as how we sing The Tune may affect the fancy but it is the Matter affects the heart and that God principally eyes The Psalmist adviseth us in this particular Psalm 47.7 and so doth the Apostle 1 Cor. 14.15 Otherwise this sweet Duty would be more the work of a Chorister than of a Christian and we should be more delighted in an Anthem of the Musician's making then in a Psalm of the Spirit 's making A Lapide observes that in the Text 1 Cor. 14.15 the word understanding is Maschil 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 profound judgment We must sing wisely if we will sing gratefully we must relish what we sing In a word we must sing as we must pray now the most rude Petitioner will understand what he prays 1 Cor. 14.15 If we do not understand what we sing it argues carelesness of Spirit or hardness of Heart and this makes the Service impertinent Upon this the worthy Davenant cries out Facessunt Boatus Papistarum qui Psalmos in Templis reboant sed linguà non intellectu Dav. Non clamans sed amans cantat in aure Dei Aug. Adieu to the bellowing of the Papists who sing in an unknown Tongue God will not understand us in this Service which we understand not our selves One of the first Pieces of the Creation was Light and this must break out in every Duty 2. We must sing with affection Love is the fulfilling of this Law It is a notable saying of Augustine It is not Crying but Loving sounds in the Ears of God In Isa 5.1 It is said I will sing to my Beloved The pretty Child sings a mean Song but it delights the Mother because there is love on both sides It is love not skill makes the Musick and the Service most pleasing When we go about this Work we must lay our Book before us a heart full of love The Primitive Christians sang Hymns to Christ whom they entirely loved Love indeed is that ingredient which sweetens and indulcorates every Service 3. We must sing with real Grace This the Apostle admonishes us Col. 3.16 It is Grace not Nature sweetens the Voice to sing We must draw out our Spices our Graces in this Duty The Hundred forty four thousand which were Elected and Glorified Saints sang the New song Rev. 14.3 Singing is the tripudiating of a gracious Soul Gratia est devotionis radix Gorran Gorran well notes That Grace is the Root of true Devotion Wicked men only make a noise they do not sing they are like crackt Strings of a Lute or a Viol they spoil they do not make Musick The Righteous rejoice in the Lord Psal 33.1 The Raven croaks the Nightingale sings the Tune As God will not hear Sinners when they pray so neither when they sing the singing of Wicked men is disturbance not obedience Indeed the Saints singing is a more solemn Ovation Praising Him who causeth them to triumph in Christ 2 Cor. 2.14 The Saints above sing their Hallelujahs in Glory and the Saints below must sing their Psalms with Grace Fashion Puppets as you please they cannot sing it is the alive Bird can chirrup that pleasing noise 4. We must sing with excited Grace Not only with Grace habitual but with excited and actual the Musical Instrument delights not but when it is plaid upon In this Duty we must follow Paul's advice to Timothy 1 Tim. 4.14 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 stir up the Grace that is in us and cry out as David Psalm 57.8 Awake Love awake Delight The Clock must be pluckt up before it can guide our Time the Bird pleaseth not in her Nest but in her Notes the Chimes only make Musick while they are going Let us therefore beg the Spirit to blow upon our Garden that the Spices thereof may flow out when we set upon this Joyous Service Cant. 5.16 God loves active Grace in Duty that the Soul should be ready trim'd when it presents it self to Christ in any Worship 5. We must sing with spiritual joy Indeed singing only makes joy articulate it is only the turning of Bullion into Coyn as the Prophet speaks to this purpose Isa 65.14 Isa 65 14. Singing is only the triumphant gladness of a gracious heart a softer Rapture We must sing as David danced before the Ark 2 Sam. 6.15 with shouting and rejoycing in God We sing to Christ And Dr. Bound observes There is no joy comparable to that we have in him this is joy unspeakable and full of glory Joy must be the Selah of this Duty 6. We must sing with Faith This grace only puts a pleasingness upon every service if we hear the Word must be mixt with Faith Heb. 4.2 if we pray it must be the prayer of Faith Jam. 5.15 We must bring Faith to Christ's Table or else as Austin saith Dormit Christus si dormit Fides Dormit Christus si dormit Fides Aug. if Faith sleeps Christ is likewise asleep and so Faith must carry on this Ordinance of Singing especially there must be a credence in the Hallelujahs above we must believe that the Saints here are only tuning their Instruments and the louder Musick will be above that in glory there will be such pleasing sounds which the Apostle tells us 1 Cor. 2.9 No Ear ever heard 7. We must sing in the Spirit As we must pray in the Spirit Jude v. 20. so we must sing in the Spirit the Spirit must breathe as well as Grace act or the Voice sound in this Duty
wont of the Puritans which were the most pretious Christians to Eccho forth the praises of the great Jehovah in this Duty especially upon the Lord's Day Then was there a holy Quire in their houses their Children were the little birds to sing the praises of the Creator the Servants likewise joining in the harmony to make up a fuller Musick But alas Now the voice of the Bride singing to her Beloved is not heard in the places of our abode there is silence instead of singing and prating instead of praising frivolous discourses instead of joyous praises It might behove us to ponder how much of Heaven do we lose in neglecting this Service In singing Psalms we begin the work of Heaven In Heaven we read of the Song of Moses and of the Lamb Rev. 15.3 And of a new Song Rev. 14.3 And the Angels though they have not Tongues yet they have voices to sing the praises of the Most High and therefore that this Heavenly service is so neglected and unexercised is a lamentation and shall be for a Lamentation Ezek. 19.14 This likewise checks those who formalize in this Duty who Act a Part not a Vse 4 Duty they make a noise and not Musick and more provoke the Eyes than please the Ears of God Hierome pathetically Exclaims against those Formalists We must not saith he Act as Players who stretch their throats to accommodate their Tongues to the matter in hand but we must sing Psalms as Saints praising God not only with our Voice but with our Heart not only with a sweet voice but with a melting heart Bernard makes two conditions of grateful singing 1. We must sing purely minding what we sing nor must we act or think any thing besides there must be no vain or vagrant thoughts no dissonancy between the Mind and the Tongue 2. We must sing strenuously not idly not sleepily or perfunctorily we must sing ex animo most heartily and Energetically Vse 5 Let us get an interest in Christ If we are not in Christ we are certainly out of tune The singing of a sinner is natural like the singing of a Bird. But the singing of a Saint is musical like the singing of a Child Saints in singing perform a grateful duty But sinners offer a vain oblation Isa 1.13 It is Christ must put an acceptation upon this service as well as others Here the Altar must sanctify the gift Christ perfumes the prayers of the Saints Rev. 5.8 And he must articulate the singing of the Saints Indeed he alone can turn our tune into melody and though in our selves we have Esau's garments yet he can give us Iacobs voice We are accepted in Christ in this offer of love Therefore let us get into Christ he can raise our voice in singing to a pleasing Elevation Let us be in him and then our steps shall be metrical our pauses musical and our very Cadencies shall be Seraphical Our singing of Psalms shall be the musick of the Sphears Vse 6 Let us sometimes raise our hearts in holy Contemplation Let us think of the Musick of the Bride-Chamber There shall be no crack't strings displeasing sounds harsh voices nothing to abate or remit our melody there shall be no willows to hang up our harps upon Psal 137.2 In the Bride-Chamber there shall be no sorrow to interfere when we sing the song of the Lamb Rev. 21.3 No grief to jar our harmony These pleasing Meditations should sometimes possess and sweeten our Spirits that while we are walking in the galleries Cant. 7.5 we may be nearer to the Palace of the great King Psal 45.15 How ought We to Improve our Baptism Serm. X. Acts 2.38 Be Baptized every one of you in the Name of Jesus Christ for the Remission of Sins THis Chapter gives us an account of the pouring out of the Spirit according to the promise presently after Christ's Ascension as soon as the Spirit was poured out the Apostles were enabled to speak in various Languages to the astonishment and wonder of the Hearers This was for the Glory of God the Confirmation of the Gospel and to authorize them as Special Messengers sent by Christ At the sight of this Miracle some wonder others mock as if this speaking with divers Tongues had been a confused jabbering that proceeded from the fumes of Wine rather than the gift and operation of the Holy Spirit To satisfie both Peter declares in a Sermon the effect and intent of the Miracle proving Jesus whom they had Crucified to be Lord and Christ When they heard this many of the most obstinate among them were pricked at the heart and relented An happy Sermon it was that Peter preached it brought in thousands of Souls to Christ the first hansel of the power of the Spirit and success of the Gospel 'T is good to observe what course they took for ease and relief after this piercing and brokenness of heart they said to Peter and the rest of the Apostles Men and Brethren what shall we do This is the usual Question of men under a sound and thorow Conviction To their serious Question Peter makes a seasonable Answer v. 38. 'T is the part of a good Physician not only to discover the Disease but also to prescribe a Remedy especially should spiritual Physicians be tender of broken-hearted Sinners and willing and ready to give them Counsel In Peter's Direction and Counsel to them observe first What he perswades them to do Secondly By what Motive and Argument what they should do and what they should receive In the Advice he perswades them to Repentance and to be Baptized in the Name of Christ The latter we are upon For Explaining it we may enquire First Why is Baptism mentioned rather than Faith and other things more internal and necessary to Salvation I answer Certainly Faith is implied for Mark 16.16 He that Believeth and is Baptized shall be Saved Baptism is an open and real Profession of Christ Crucified So that Be Baptized in the Name of Jesus Christ is as much as Be Baptized Believing on the Name of the Lord Jesus for the Remission of Sins Secondly Baptism is mentioned because it was the visible Rite of receiving Proselytes to Christ Now it imported them who were convinced as Persecutors to turn Professors if they would have ease for their Consciences and therefore not only to Believe with the Heart but to make open Profession of Faith in Christ Rom. 10.10 Quest 2. Why in the Name of Christ only the Father and the Holy Ghost is not mentioned according to the Prescript-form Mat. 28.19 I answer he speaks not of the Form of Baptism but the use and end thereof Now the great use of Baptism is that we may have benefit by the Mystery of Redemption by Christ therefore elsewhere we are said to be Baptized into Jesus Christ Rom. 5.3 And to put on Christ Gal. 3.27 He is the Head of the Church and by Baptism we are planted into his Mystical Body This being
premised my work shall be to shew what use and respect Baptism has unto this benefit of obtaining remission of Sins by Jesus Christ I shall do it in these considerations 1. First that God hath ever delighted to deal with his Creatures in the way of a Covenant that we might know what to expect from him and might look upon our selves as under the firmer Bonds of obedience to his blessed Majesty In a Covenant which is the most solemn transaction between Man and Man both parties are engaged God to us and we to God It is not meet that one party should be bound and the other free therefore both are bound to each other God to Bless and we to Obey Indeed in the first Covenant the debitum poenae is only mentioned because that only took place Gen. 2.17 In the day thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely dye But the other part is implied and it doth in effect speak thus much Do and Live Sin and Dye 2. Secondly because the first Covenant was broken on our part God was pleased to enter into a second wherein he would manifest the glory of his Redeeming grace and pardoning Mercy to fallen Man this was brought about in Christ 2 Cor. 5.19 God was in Christ reconciling the world to himself and therefore this second Covenant is called a Covenant of Peace as being made with us after the breach and when Man was obnoxious to the wrath of God Isa 54.10 The Covenant of my Peace shall not be removed Man needeth such a Covenant and God appeased by Christ offereth it to us 3. Thirdly In this Covenant of Peace the Priviledges and Duties are suited to the State in which man was when God invited him into Covenant with himself Man was fallen from his Duty and obnoxious to the wrath and displeasure of God and therefore the new Covenant is a Doctrine of Repentance and Remission of Sins What is Preach the Gospel to every Creature Mark 16.16 is in Luk. 24.47 That Repentance and Remission of sins should be Preached in his Name among all Nations for that is the Gospel or the new Remedial Law of our Lord Jesus Repentance to heal us and set us in joint again as to our Duty Remission of Sins to recover us into God's favour both these benefits we have by the Redeemer Acts 5.31 Him hath God exalted to give Repentance and Remission of Sins to Israel he giveth the one simply and both giveth and requireth the other so that by the New Covenant Remission of Sins is conveyed to all true Penitents Fourthly More distinctly to understand the tenour of this New and second Covenant we must consider both the Duties and the Priviledges thereof for in every Covenant there is ratio dati accepti there is something promised and given and something required and usually the Promise consists of somewhat which the Party is willing of and the Duty or Condition required of that to which he is more backward and loath to submit so in the Covenant of Grace in the Promise God respects man's want in the Duty his own Honour Every man would have pardon and be saved from Hell but God will have subjection even corrupt Nature is not against desires of Happiness these God makes use of to gain us to Holiness All men readily catch at Felicity and would have Impunity Peace Comfort Glory but are unwilling to deny the Flesh to renounce the credit profit or pleasure of Sin or to grow dead to the World and worldly things Now God promiseth what we desire on condition that we will submit to those things that we are against as we sweeten bitter Pills to Children that they may swallow them the better they love the Sugar though they loath the Alloes so doth God invite us to our Duty by our Interest Therefore whosoever would enter into the Gospel-state must resolve to take the Blessings and Benefits offered for his Happiness and the Duties required for his Work Indeed accepting of the Benefits is a part of the Condition because we treat with an invisible God about a happiness that lieth in another World but 't is but part there are other terms and therefore we must draw nigh with a true heart in full assurance of Faith Heb. 10.22 With a true heart resolving upon the Duties of the Covenant in full assurance of Faith depending upon God's Word that he will give us the blessings Fifthly The Priviledges are two Pardon and Life these are the great Blessings offered in the New Covenant you have them both together Acts 26.18 To turn them from darkness to light and from the power of Satan unto God that they may receive forgiveness of sins and inheritance among them that are sanctified by Faith These two Benefits are most necessary the one to allay the Fears of the guilty Creature and the other to gratifie Desires of Happiness which are natural to us the one to remedy the misery incurr'd by Sin and the Fall of Man the other to establish our true and proper Felicity in the everlasting enjoyment of God the one to ease our Consciences and support us against troubles of mind the other to comfort us against the outward troubles and afflictions which sin hath introduced into the World In short the one to free us from deserved Punishment the other to assure us of undeserved Blessedness the one importeth Deliverance from Eternal Death and the other Entrance into Eternal Life Sixthly The Duties thereof do either concern our first entrance into the Christian state or our Progress therein Our Lord representeth it under the Notions of the Gate and the Way Mat. 7.14 Strait is the Gate and narrow is the Way which leadeth into Life Other Scriptures deliver it under the notions of making Covenant and keeping Covenant with God making Covenant Psal 50.5 keeping Covenant Psal 25.10 Psal 103.18 The Covenant must not only be made but kept I. As to entring into Covenant with God there is required true Repentance and Faith Mark 1.15 Repent and believe the Gospel Repentance respects God as our end Faith respects Christ as the great means or way to the Father Acts 20.21 Repentance towards God and Faith in our Lord Jesus Christ God is our end for Christ died to bring us to God 1 Pet. 3.18 and Christ is our way John 14.6 and whole Christiany is a coming to God by Christ Heb. 7.25 Now in our first entrance Faith and Repentance are both mixt and it is hard to sever them and show what belongs to the one and what to the other at least it would perplex the Discourse Both together imply that a man be turn'd from a life of Sin to God by Faith in Christ or a renouncing the Devil the World and the Flesh and devoting and dedicating our selves to God 1. A Renouncing of the Devil the World and the Flesh for these are the three great Enemies of God and our Salvation Eph. 2.2 3. In time past ye walked according to
the Course of this World after the Prince of the power of the Air the Spirit that works now in the children of disobedience among whom also we had our conversation in the lusts of the flesh fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind There all our Enemies appear abreast the Devil as the Grand deceiver and principal of all wickedness the World with its Pleasures Honours and Profits as the Bait by which it doth deceive us and steal away our hearts from God and pervert and divert us that we should not look after the one thing necessary the Flesh is that Corrupt Inclination in us which entertains and closeth with these Temptations to the neglect of God and the wrong of our own Souls this is very importtnate to be pleased and is the proper internal cause of all our mischief for James 1.14 Every man is inticed and drawn away by his own lust These must be renounced before we can return to God for till we put away our Idols we cannot incline our hearts to the true God Josuah 24.23 And these are the great Idols by which our hearts are estranged from him When God is laid aside self interposeth as the next Heir and that which we count self is the flesh Many wrong their own Souls but never any man hated his own flesh That which feeds the flesh is the World and the Devil by proposing the Bait irritateth and stirreth up our affections Therefore we must be turned from Satan to God we must be delivered from the present evil World we must abstain from fleshly Lusts for God will have no Co-partners and Competitors in our hearts 2. A devoting and giving up our selves to God Father Son and Holy Ghost as our God 2 Cor. 8.3 and Rom. 6.13 As our owner by Creation Psal 100.3 And by Redemption 1 Cor. 6.19 20. As our Soveraign Lord Jer. 24.8 Isa 26.13 Other Lords besides thee have had dominion over us c. As the fountain of our life and blessedness Psal 31.14 I trusted in the Lord I said thou art my God Lam. 3.24 The Lord is my portion saith my Soul therefore will I hope in him Psal 119.57 I have said thou art my Potion therefore I will keep thy Precepts II. As to our Progress and Perseverance which is our walking in the narrow way and shews the sincerity and heartiness of our consent in making the Covenant And besides this is not the work of a Day but of our whole Lives we have continual need of coming to God by Christ Here three things are required 1. As to the Enemies of God and our Souls there must be a forsaking as well as a renouncing the Devil must be forsaken we must be no more of his party and confederacy we must resist stand out against all his batteries and assaults 1 Pet. 5.8 9. the World must be overcome 1 John 5.4 5. and the flesh must be subdued and mortified Gal. 5.24 that we be no more governed by the desires thereof and if we be sometimes foiled we must not go back again but renew our Resolutions and the drift of our lives must still be for God and Heaven 2. As to God to whom we have devoted our selves we must love and please and serve him all our days Luke 1.75 we must make it our work to love him and count it our happiness to be beloved by him and carefully apply our selves to seek his favour and cherish a fresh sense of it upon our hearts and continue with patience in well-doing Rom. 2.7 till we come to the complete sight and love of him in Heaven 1 John 3.2 3. You must always live in the hope of the coming of Christ and everlasting glory Tit. 2.3 looking for the blessed hope and Jude v. 21. looking for the mercy of our Lord Jesus unto eternal life As we did at first thankfully accept of our recovery by Christ and at first consent to renounce the Devil the World and the Flesh and resolve to follow God's counsel and direction we must still persevere in this mind and use his appointed means in order to our final happiness The sum then of our Christianity is that we should by true Repentance and Faith forsake the World the Flesh and the Devil and give up our selves to God Father Son and Holy Ghost that he may take us for his reconciled Children and for Christ's sake forgive all our sins and by his Spirit give us grace to persevere in those Resolutions till our full and final happiness come in hand Seventhly This Covenant consisting of such Duties and Priviledges God hath confirmed by certain visible Ordinances commonly called Sacraments as Baptism and the Lord's Supper both which but in a different manner respect the whole tenour of the Covenant For as the Covenant bindeth mutually on God's part and ours so these Duties have a mutual Aspect or Respect to what God does and what we must do on God's part they are a Sign and a Seal on our part they are a Badge and a Bond. 1. On God's part they are sealing or confirming Signs as Circumcision is called a sign or seal of the righteousness which is by faith Rom. 4.11 that is of the grace offered to us in Christ so is Baptism which came in the Room of Circumcision Col. 2.11 12. In whom ye are circumcised buried with him in Baptism Surely the Gospel-Ordinances signifie as much grace as the Ordinances of the legal Covenant if Circumcision was a Sign and Seal of the Righteousness which is by Faith a or pledge of God's good will to us in Christ so is Baptism so is the Lord's Supper they are a Sign to signifie and a Seal to confirm to represent the Grace and assure the grant of Pardon and Life As for instance Baptism signifies Pardon and Life so does the Lord's Supper Matth. 26.28 29. That for our growth and nourishment this for our imitation Baptism is under our consideration at present that it hath respect to remission of Sins the Text is clear for it and so are many other Scriptures It was Ananias his Advice to Paul Acts 22.16 Arise and be Baptized and wash away thy sins and call on the Name of the Lord. So Ephes 5.26 That he might sanctifie and cleanse us by the washing of water through the Word The washing represents the washing away the guilt and filth of sin it signifies also our Resurrection to a blessed and eternal Life Baptism saveth by the Resurrection of Christ 1 Pet. 3.21 Well then it is a sealing Sign When God promised longer life to Hezekiah 2 Kings 20.8 he said What shall he the sign that the Lord will heal me So when he promiseth pardon and life to us What shall be the sign that the Lord will do this for us Baptism is this sign a witness between us and God Gen. 31.48 This heap is a witness between thee and me 2. On our part they are a Badge and a Bond to oblige us to the
doing of greater good in humane Society for the time to come but more especially in Religious Nurture instruction in Righteousness 2 Tim. 3.16 and as it follows in the admonition of the Lord In the best and highest kind of Nurture that which is drawn and fetcht from the Word of the Lord and so will be most accepted of him and most profitable to Children Not only in Arts and Sciences to make them Worldly wise and Learned nor only in the Mysteries of Trading and Worldly employment to make them Rich nor only in matters of Morality and Civil honesty to make them Sober and vertuous but in the mysteries of true Religion in the nurture and admonition of the Lord 1 Tim. 4.6 in the words of Faith and good Doctrine to make them truly happy 2. Presidents It was the constant practice of the Saints of old carefully to instruct their children in the things of God And that 1. In the Truths and Worship of the true God Thus Divines conclude that Adam instructed his Sons Gen. 4.3 4. Cain and Abel to bring their Offerings to the Lord And from Adam down along to Moses for the space of two thousand years how was the true Religion communicated but by Oral Tradition from Parents to their Children Gen. 18.19 I know Abraham that he will command his Children and his Houshold after him and they shall keep the way of the Lord to do Justice and Judgment that the Lord may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him In this Text we have Abraham's Testimonial subscribed by God himself Wherein God 1. Asserts what Abraham was for the present a man of integrity a man greatly beloved of God I know Abraham I know his judgment I know his heart I am well acquainted with the frame of his spirit the inclination of his Will the bent of his Affections and I know him so well that I cannot but highly approve and dearly love him and will trust him with an Arcanum make him as it were of my Privy Councel in imparting to him my great design concerning wicked Sodom 2. Foretells for the future 1. What Abraham would do for God viz. That he would endeavour to bring all that were under his Command to be at God's Command Abraham will not leave his children and servants to their own Genius counsels lusts ignorance idleness superstition idolatry but command them to keep the way of Jehovah Abraham will endeavour to set up God in his Family to instruct it in that way of Faith Worship and Obedience which God requireth 2. What God will do for Abraham viz. fulfil his Promise keep his Word Holy Job that Non pareil of the World none like him in the Earth Job 1.8 that perfect that upright man Job sends and sanctifies his children i. e. says that late burning and shining Light sent a Message to them to command them to prepare and fit themselves for the holy duty of Sacrificing This preparation to holy Duties is often call'd Sanctifying Exod. 19.20 1 Sam. 6.5 Job 11.55 Job 1.5 Josâ—ph Caryl on Job 1.5 Job's main and special care was for the Souls of his children Job's Message to his children was not to ask them how they did after their Feasting whether they had surfeited how the reckoning was inflamed No his eye and heart mostly fixt on this that they might be sanctified His holy Soul struck a perfect light to Paul's desire before Agrippa Acts 26.29 I would to God that not only thou but all that hear me this day were both almost and altogether such as I am And to John's joy John Ep. 3.4 I have no greater joy than to hear that thy children walk in the truth Thus David that man after God's own heart Psal 34.11 Come ye children hearken unto me I will teach you the fear of the Lord. But more especially I would commend to your most accurate view that lovely Prospect presented to us in Prov. 4.3 4. Behold there a great and glorious King descending from his Imperial Throne laying aside his Golden Crown and Royal Scepter and sitting down on a lower seat with a Child a Solomon at his knee So that the King is now humbled into a Tutor the Prince into a Pupil A brief account of the Lecture the Text gives us I was my Father's Son i. e. I was so my Father's Son as that I was also his Jedidiah so beloved as if I had been his only Son He taught me also and said unto me Let thine heart retain my words keep my Commandments and live Thus we have seen the practice of godly Fathers but what have godly Mothers done have they been so cruelly forgetful of their children as not to have compassion on the Sons of their Womb What! worse than Sea-Monsters who draw out their breasts and give suck to their young ones No Lam. 4.3 no those true Daughters of Sarah have been more spiritually kind and benign 1. In the Front of these stands our Mother the Spouse of Christ Can. 8.2 Ass Annot in Cant. 8.2 I would lead thee and bring thee into my Mothers House i. e. into mine own House or Mansion as is usual with us to call our own Houses the Houses of our Fathers The Church in her Universal Latitude is the Mother of all her Members who would or doth instruct me The Church John 6.45 who is the Pillar and ground of truth in this respect that she presenteth and holdeth forth that truth outwardly which only Christ bringeth to the heart and makes effectual 2. Upon her right hand stands David's Royal Consort Queen Bathsheba whom we find laying the Law before King Lemuel i. e. her Son Solomon called Lemuel i. e. of God because God had ordained him to be King over Israel rather than any of his Elder Brethren 1 Kings 2.15 22. The words of King Lemuel the Prophesie Doctrine or Instruction that his Mother taught him 2. What my Son and what the Son of my Womb Prov. 31.1 2. and what the Son of my Vows 3. Upon her left hand let the hoary-headed holy Grand mother Lois and the tender discreet pious Mother Eunice be placed who even from the Dug as it were instructed their hopeful Timothy in the knowledg of the Holy Scriptures 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 2 Tim. 1.5 3.15 16 11. which were able to make him wise unto Salvation 2. In the ways and works of God's Providence Thus Gideon gives testimony to his Forefathers that they had told their Children of all the Miracles which the Lord had done saying did not the Lord bring us from Egypt Jud. 6.13 Thus the Psalmist Psal 44.1 2. We have heard with our ears O God Psal 44.1 c. our Fathers have told us what work thou didst in their days in the times of old And again Psal 78.3 4 5 6 7. Sayings of old which we have heard and known and our Fathers have told us 4. We will not hide
Philip to the Noble Eunuch q. d. To what purpose readest thou if thou be not careful to understand what thou readest The Word Preached either by Pastor or Teacher the Truth deliver'd in a way of Catechizing will do us no good unless we hear with understanding Hearken unto me every one of you and understand Mark 7.14 saith the greatest Preacher and have ye understood all these things Matth. 13.51 Dear Brethren as I know you desire not to sow your seed on the high-way Mat. 13 19. so as that the Fowls of that Prince of the Air should come and pick it up so be careful to make poor Creatures to understand what they are taught Now for the opening of the Truths laid down in the Assemblies Catechism I cannot but commend those four Books which I have found so exceeding useful for the younger ones among our people viz. Dr. Wallis Mr. Jos Alleyn Mr. Tho. Vincent and Mr. Tho. Dolittle their excellent Explanations 3. You will be sure to act very wisely very discreetly You know in Catechizing you have to do with different Sexes Ages Tempers Capacities some are less capable and more bashful these must not be expos'd to the scorn and contempt of those that have it may be more glib tougues and brazen foreheads but worse hearts You know when and how to incourage the willing to praise the forward to check the presumptuous to admonish the unruly patiently to bear with all You know what it is 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 to be Soul Nurses 1 Thess 2.7 8. how to impart with all dearness those Fundamental Truths which make for their spiritual and eternal good and growth 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 And shall I take leave in your names to assure younger ones that you will have a tender eye to the slowness of apprehension in some of them to the slipperiness of memory in others to the bashfulness of most to the reputation of them all That you will opportunely prevent their grosser mistakes and candidly palliate their lesser ones that you will give the best sense to the worst of their Answers and put some necessary words into their mouths the better to facilitate the expression of their thoughts that you will so wisely manage the whole business as that it may make for their reputation as well as instruction and that they may find favour both with God and men 4. What you do do it resolvedly and that in God's strength not in your own Expect opposition from within from without From within a proud heart apt to mutter 't is a low mean piece of drudgery No but rather the most Doctor-like part of our work and such as cannot accurately be perform'd without a clear insight into the greatest depths of Religion and a proportionable gift of ready Exposition The lowest Principles of Religion are the highest Mysteries Again the tender shoulder that shrugs and enters its Plea against the burthen as being too troublesom a weight to be added to the Load of our other Lords-day-labours Neither will this prevail with you Brethren we are confident you are not only able 2 Tim. 2.14 2 Cor. 12.15 but apt to teach 'T is your joy to spend your selves and be spent in the utmost service of your God and his Church You will not be much concern'd in the consuming of your Oyl so you may lend your Light To such gracious Souls as yours there is there can be no greater burthen than the sense you have of the heaviness of your people in hearing But from without the general averseness of young ones is pleaded as a grand obstruction As to that you are so well seen in spiritual Logick as to fetch meat out of this Eater and will easily conclude that this averseness in young ones from this exercise of Catechizing is not the least Argument of its singular usefulness The more unwilling the Patient is to have his Wound open'd searcht plaister'd and bound the more eager the compassionate Chirurgion is to give relief The more unwilling they are to present themselves to be Catechiz'd the more reason have we to press them to it by the greatest violence of perswasion .. Lastly let not want of success discourage Your Heavenly Master you know hath assured you that your labour is not 1 Cor. 15. last shall not be in vain in the Lord. God takes the measures of his servants not from their success which is his sole work but from their sedulous and faithful endeavors which is their duty Go you on to plant and water let the great Lord of the Vineyard alone to give the increase And know 2 Cor. 8.12 1 Cor. 3.6 7. 2 Cor. 2.15 you are a sweet savour unto God and though Israel be not gather'd but you seem to have spent your strength in vain yet surely your judgment is with the Lord and your work and wages with your God Isa 49.4 I have now done with the particular directions there remain yet some more general ones which being observed may with God's Blessing much promote the success of this whole work And so 1. To spiritual instruction add holy admonition exhortation good advice and counsel Do not only let them know by instruction what their duty is but press urge inforce this duty upon them by admonition and good counsel O my Child you see your Duty you know what you ought to do O do according to what you know What a strong powerful prevailing influence hath good counsel when duly applied Only see 1. That you back your counsel with the clearest Scripture and most convincing Arguments you can possibly Good advice without these is but a Bullet without Powder and Arrow without a Feather Argue with them about the Excellency of God Christ the Spirit Grace the vanity of the Creature the folly and sinfulness of sin See how Job handles the matter with his Wife about murmuring and impatience against God Job 2.10 What shall we receive good at the hand of God and not evil Hear what Bathsheba saith to Solomon Prov. 31.2 3 4. What my Son and what the Son of my Womb c. It is not for Kings O Lemuel it is not for Kings c. Shew them the beauty of Christ draw aside the Curtain let them behold the Image of that blessed Saviour pourtrayed in Scripture Do to them as the Spouse did to the Daughters of Jerusalem run over all the Excellencies of Christ to them and then conclude He is altogether lovely This is my Beloved and this is my Friend Can. 5.16 O Daughters of Jerusalem 2. Labour as much as possible to insinuate your selves into their affections Having clear'd your way into their heads labour to wind and scrue your selves into their hearts Let them know that you have no design upon them but to make them happy no private end only their everlasting good This done thou hast done all thy work when all jealousies of any sinister ends are blown away then Exhortations and
Counsels go down glibly When persons are fully satisfied that in all our Addresses to them we study only their benefit and profit this opens an effectual door to all the means that we shall use Thus Paul accosts the Romans I long to see you that I may impart unto you some spiritual gift Rom. 1.10 11. Thus he smooths his way to the Philippians Phil. 1.8 God is my Record how greatly I long after you all in the bowels of Jesus Christ Labour then to get their love their good esteem and the work will thrive beyond expectation Love is like the oiling of the Key which makes it to open the lock more easily love greaseth the nail and makes it enter with more facility 2. To holy hearty serious affectionate frequent admonition add an exemplary Conversation Inferiours are apt to be led rather by example than rule and are more prone to imitate Practices than to learn Principles They are more mindful of what we do than of what we say and they will be very prone to suspect that we are not in good earnest when they see that we command them one thing and do another our selves When we teach them well and do amiss our selves we do but pull down with one hand what we build with the other Like a man that at the same time sings a lovely Song and drowns the melody of it by playing an ugly Tune When the Father is immodest the Child that sees it soon grows impudent and therefore the Ancients thought themselves concern'd to be very reserv'd and cautelous before their children Maxima debetur pueris reverentia Psal 101.2 Nâ—l faedum dictu visâ—que ea limina â—angat intra quae pura est Pâ—il 1.4 Col. 1 3. Rom. 10.1 Walk as David therefore in thy house with a perfect heart Let thy children and servants behold nothing in thy deportment which if follow'd may prove sinful 3. To an exemplary conversation add faithful fervent humble constant supplication Paul without ceasing makes mention of his heart's desire and his prayer to God for Israel was that they might be saved Ministers like spiritual Priests should not fail to offer their daily Sacrifices for their people confess their iniquities bewail their misery and cry mightily to God for his mercy All our instructions without prayer will do no good Go to God to sanctifie all By prayer carry thy children servants to the blessed Jesus in the Arms of Faith and beseech him to bless them by laying on his hands on them as Isaac did The accustomed Ceremony used in Blessing Beza in Mat. 19. Impositio manuum Symbolum fuit apud Judaeos familiare quoties solâ—nnis erat precatio vel benedictâ— Mat. 15.22 Gen. 27.1 and 48.9 14. with Matth. 19.13 and Mark 10.16 How pathetically did Abraham plead with God for Ishmael Oh that Ishmael might live before thee Gen. 17.18 Bathsheba calls for Solomon the Son of her Vows Prov. 31.2 Austin the Child of Monica's prayers and tears O pray then pray earnestly O that this my Son Daughter Servant might not dye for ever Thou Lord art the Prince and Lord of Life O speak powerfully to their poor Souls that these pieces of my bowels that are now dead in trespasses and sins may hear thy voice and live Cry out to God with that poor man in the Gospel Lord have mercy on my Son Matth. 17.15 If a Mother do as the Woman of Canaan did Have mercy on me O Lord my Daughter is grievously vexed with a Devil If he seem not to hear and to be silent go nearer to him by Faith and cry Lord help me Lord help me If his Answer seem to be a repulse do not thou desist but rather gather Arguments from his denial as she did and conclude that if he once open his mouth he will not shut his hand and if importunity may prevail with an unrighteous man then much more it will obtain with a gracious God Never leave him therefore till by laying hold on his own strength thou hast overcome him At last thou mayst hear that ravishing voice O Woman be it unto thee even as thou wilt and see thy Daughter made whole from that very hour 4. Lastly To fervent supplication add wary inspection Keep a strict hand Dr. Jacomb Dem. Dâ—c 83. and a watchful eye continually over those that are committed to your charge your utmost care and vigilancy in this will be found little enough How soon will those Gardens that now look like a Paradise be overgrown with weeds if the Keepers thereof do not look to them daily How soon is Childhood and Youth tainted with sin if it be not narrowly watcht Be thou diligent therefore to know the state of thy Flock and look well to thy Herds Carefully observe the natural temper of your inferiours you will by this the better know how to apply your selves to them in advice reproof correction Observe the first sprouts and buds of what is either good or evil in them encourage commend reward them in the one curb restrain and prevent the further growth of the other Do they begin to take God's Name in vain Do they nibble at a lye Doth Pride in apparel peep forth Be sure to kill this Serpent in the very egg to crush this Cockatrice in the Shell 2. Thus of Superiours A word to Inferiours and I have done Dear Lambs the Searcher of Hearts knows how greatly I long after you all in the Bowels of Jesus Christ Shall I prevail with you to remember this when I am laid with my Fathers viz. That 't is no less your Duty to make Religion your business in the relation of Children and Servants than 't is ours in the relation of Parents and Masters Oh what a credit what a glory is it to drink in the Dews of Godliness in the morning of your lives What a lovely sight to behold those Trees blossoming with the fruits of the Spirit in the Spring of their Age Better is a poor and a wise Child than an old and a foolish King Eccl. 4.13 What a Garland of Honour doth the Holy Ghost put on the head of an holy Child How profitable is early Piety Some Fruits ripe early in the year are worth treble the price of latter Fruits Godliness at any time brings in much gain but he that comes first to the Market is like to make the best price of his Ware On the other side how dangerous are delays Remember Children late Repentance like untimely fruits seldom comes to any thing Your lives are very uncertain As young as you are you may be old enough for a Grave Oh then seek your God 1 Tim. 6.6 We read of one that truly repented at his last gasp that so none might despair but 't is of but one that none might presume and seek him when and whiles he may be found Isa 55.5 If thou refuse him now he may refuse thee hereafter I have heard of one that deferring Repentance
acceptance with God or in a condition of spiritual life that is the forerunner and earnest of a life of glory 2. But again if you consider the nature of the drink which he hath appointed it is wine and not water By it may be signified thus much that as there is no sort of drink so grateful to the palate so reviving and strengthning to the spirits so that spiritual life that the Soul is raised to by the Death of Christ is a life of the greatest pleasure and joy that is conceivable for as no liquor like Wine doth chear a sad drooping spirit so nothing doth so glad and chear the Soul as Faith in a Crucified Christ according to that of the Apostle Peter in whom though we have not seen 1 Pet. 1.8 yet believing we rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory Thus much for the Duty this do 2. The end of the Duty and that is in remembrance of me Here are two things to be inquired into I. What reason was there for the instituting an Ordinance for his remembrance II. Why of all the acts and expressions of his love to sinners above all he would be remembred in his sufferings for us which is the special signification of this Supper 1 To the first I say you must call to mind that the time of instituting this supper was the night before that day he died Now the consequent of his Death was to be this that he should be taken from Earth to Heaven there to be personally present till the day of judgment Now that his Church on Earth might not forget him in this long absence he therefore appointed this supper for a frequent quickning them to the remembrance of him till he came again 2 To the other Question I Answer That the reasons why Jesus would have this act of his love to be especially remembred above all other may be these 1. Because his dying for his Church was the greatest act of love he ever shewed his Church Greater love saith Christ hath no man than this John 15.13 1 John 3.16 that a man lay down his life for his friends Again saith the Apostle Hereby perceive we the love of God because he laid down his life for us If a man should part with his liberty and suffer bonds or lay down his estate and become poor or leave his Country and become an exile for his friend these were all expressions of great love but none of them are comparable to laying down life and shedding ones blood for a friend This last is that wherein Christ hath eminently demonstrated his love to his Church this he glorieth in and this is that which he would never have his Church forget but frequently remember in this supper 2. Because that though he gave and still doth give very great testimonies of his love to us as in his Resurrection Ascension Intercession preparing Glory and lastly in his coming again to raise us justifie us and to take us to himself to behold and enjoy that Glory that he had with the Father before the World was yet this Ordinance is rather for the remembrance of his bloody Death for us than for the remembrance of any of the other blessings and why Because that all these other depend on this Christ could never have risen to our justification had he not died for the satisfaction of the Law and his Fathers Justice Nor would he have been admitted as an Intercessor nor have been allowed one mansion in Glory for any of us nor would his Father have suffered him to have returned again to take any one of us to himself if he had not by his death made our peace opened the new way into the Holy of Holies and purchased a glorious Resurrection and an Ascension to the Heavenly and eternal glory for us So that since all his other acts of love to his Church depend on this of his dying no wonder if he appointed this Supper for the remembrance of his death rather than any thing else he either did or promised to do for us The Conclusion is that since that the end of this Ordinance is so glorious and that is the remembrance of the greatest love that ever God the Father or Son shewed to us it cannot but cast a Lustre and Glory upon the duty of coming to this Supper and engage us to a chearful participation thereof 3. The Obligation to this duty and that is Christ's Command this is implied in the Text but exprest in the foregoing verse what saith the Apostle Paul I have received of the Lord that which also I declare unto you The Apostle doth but declare the Command is Christ's he is the Author of it It is Christ not Paul that said This do in remembrance of me Christ's Commands are the bonds by which we are tied up to Obedience if we break his bonds we are transgressors Remember who they were that conspired together saying Let us break his bonds asunder and cast away his cords from us they were such that the Lord hath in derision to whom he will one day speak in his wrath and vex them in his sore displeasure The commands of superiors set out all duty to inferiors and punish for neglect and the higher or greater the superior is the more authority hath the command and the greater punishment will be inflicted on the disobedient If disobedience to the word spoken by Angels received a just recompence of reward of how much sorer punishment shall they be thought worthy that disobey the command of Jesus Christ If a Child's disobedience deserves the rod or a Servants the cudgel or a Subjects the axe or halter what doth disobedience to the Lord Jesus deserve that is greater than Father or Master or any earthly Soveraign whatever Take heed then my brethren of being found guilty of neglect of this duty that is bound upon you by the command of so great an authority as this of the Lord Jesus that hath said This do in remembrance of me 4. In the next place is to be considered the persons obliged and those are the Church of Christ so far as by Scriptural Qualifications they are capacitated to a participation thereof who are 1. Those that can discern the Lord's body in this supper the want of this the Apostle gives as the reason of unworthy receiving it 1 Cor. 10.29 and tells us they eat damnation to themselves Now there are two ways wherein the Lord's body may be said to be discerned in this supper 1. When the Understanding is spiritually enlightned to perceive the true nature and ends of this supper and thereby is enabled to see a greater difference between this and our ordinary meals for he that shall for want of knowledg therein come to this Table with no better preparations or to no other intents than when he goes to his own Table he doth certainly pervert the ends of the institution and prophanes the Ordinance and therefore cannot chuse
of the means of grace and pray him to give thee that repentance faith and knowledg that may make thee worthy and be assured that God is merciful Jam. 1. Mat. 7. and giveth liberally to those that ask and upbraideth no man ask and you shall have seek and you shall find But if you will not be at this pains thy unworthiness is voluntary and thy complaint of unfitness is meer hypocrisie and then remember the many woes denounced against Hypocrites Yet there may be some children of God that are prepared but yet dare not come because they do not understand that they are prepared To these I say if through ignorance of your own state you be kept off why do you not come to such Ministers that you judg faithful to help you you will carry your evidences to men skilful in the Law to judg of your title to an earthly inheritance and if your body be under some distemper you will ask your Physician what he thinks of you and why will you not then go to some able Minister and ask his judgment of you and desire his directions I dare say this course would set many a weak Christian at liberty from his doubts and perplexities which have and may so intangle him that as he yet hath not seen his right to his priviledges so he may go on in this darkness for ought I know to his death Be therefore perswaded to take advice The Conclusion is this I would that all of you whose consciences bear you witness that you are the Lord's people and that you have given your selves up to Christ would take up a resolution to be obedient to the Lord in coming to this Supper as he hath commanded and as you have heard this morning take heed of sinning against light with your eyes wide open upon it sins of ignorance God may wink at but when you sin presumptuously though it be against the least command and persevere in it I question whether it be consistent with salvation but if it be doubtless it will be a Salvation through the fire The Lord give you understanding A Religious Fast The duty whereof is asserted described perswaded in a brief exercise upon Mark 2.20 But the days will come when the Bridegroom shall be taken away from them and then shall they Fast in those days THose words are an answer to a question or rather a reply to an objection made by the Disciples of John and the Pharisees against Christ concerning Fasting v. 18. And the Disciples of John and the Pharisees used to fast and they come and say unto him why do the Disciples of John and the Pharisees fast but thy Disciples fast not Christ returns his answer by a fit parable as that was his usual way of teaching v. 19. Can the Children of the Bride-chamber fast while the Bridegroom is with them as long as they have the Bridegroom with them they cannot fast And so the duty was not now in season We have the same story recorded by two other Evangelists Math. 9. Luke 5. only with this difference In Matthew we read it was only the Disciples of John that made the objection but in Mark and Luke is added the Disciples of John and the Pharisees Again Matthew and Mark mention only fasting Luke addeth why do the Disciples of John fast often and make prayers he means it of the prayers used by them upon their fast days Luke also addeth but eat and drink here was the objection Wherein we shall first consider the occasion of it and then the persons that made it and then the reply that Christ maketh to it which will bring me to the Text. The occasion of it was First That which is mentioned by all these Evangelists Christ's entring the house of Levi the Publican vvho had made him a great feast and there was a great company of Publicans and others present and Christ and his Disciples sat down and did eat and drink vvith them Now this was one ground of the objection That Christ and his Disciples did not use that austerity and abstinence in meat and drinks as they ought but did too much indulge their sensual appetite as elsewhere he was accused as a wine-bibber and gluttonous Math. 11.19 especially seeing he did eat and drink with Publicans and sinners Secondly The Disciples of John and the Pharisees used several fasts besides the Annual fast enjoined by the Law upon the seventh month and the tenth day of the month for the whole congregation of Israel As we read of their often fasting Math. 9.14 Luke 5.33 And the Pharisee mentioned Luke 18.12 pleads I fast twice in the week and Chemnitius in his Harmony conjectures they did still observe the fasts of the fourth moneth and fifth month seventh and tenth moneth that the Jews observed in the 70 years captivity mentioned Zach. 8.19 As also that which was observed by Esther and her Maidens Mordecai and the Jews in Shushan before her going into the King to speak for the lives of her people Esther 4.16 to preserve the solemn remembrance of the calamities of those times he thinks they kept still those fasts but besides they observed many Fasts devised and appointed by themselves which may be reckoned among the Traditions of the Pharisees imposed upon their Disciples Now Christ and his Disciples not fasting as they fasted was another ground of the objection as is expresly mentioned by the Evangelist Next we may consider the persons that make the objection whereby we may see yet further ground of it It was the Disciples of the Pharisees and John These Pharisees were the chief Ring-leaders upon all occasions in any opposition against Christ one while they object against him and his Disciples for not observing the Sabbath Another while for not washing before they did eat and sometimes for his too much familiarity with Publicans and sinners c. And here for not fasting And now they ingaged the Disciples of John with them that they might make their objection and opposition the more plausible for John was in great reputation with the people Wherein John's Disciples were justly to be blamed for joining with the Pharisees in an opposition to Christ who were his inveterate adversaries But John their Master being now in Prison they were the more easily drawn in with them for had he been with them he would not have suffered such a thing his great errand and business being to raise up the reputation of Christ among the people to remove prejudices against him to prepare the way for him and to turn the hearts of the people to him A pregnant instance whereof we have John 3.26 27 28. where John's Disciples came with a story to their Master Rabbi he that was with thee beyond Jordan to whom thou bearest witness behold the same baptizeth and all come to him but John answered A man can receive nothing except it be given from above ye your selves bear me witness that I said I was
upon it that may reflect sadness upon all your hearts where hath God a people especially in these European parts of the world but there is a distress upon them whether ye look into France Germany upper or lower Hungaria Silesia Polonia c. And doth not all this make fasting a duty in season when Nehemiah heard from certain that came from Judah that the Remnant left of the Captivity were in great affliction and that the wall of Jerusalem was broken down c. he sate down mourned fasted and prayed before the God of heaven Nehem. 1.4 and this he did though he himself was in a good Office in the Persian Court. Was our Condition ever so good at home yet we should lay to heart the afflictions of our brethren abroad For as we are to rejoice with them that rejoice so to weep with them that weep and what further calamities may yet break forth we know not but the sky looks still red and lowring and pourtends bad weather and it is our wisdom so to discern the face of the sky as to betake our selves to the proper duty of the times And thus to observe and serve the times is good Christian policy 3. Is the agitation of great affairs in the world an occasion for fasting this also requires it of us at this day Are not the Nations embroil'd in Wars both by Land and Sea are there not also some negotiations of peace on foot Is not the great Council of the Land to meet here at home and do not these extraordinary affairs call us to extraordinary duties that they may be all superintended and guided to an happy issue in the end 4. Is there not a strange stupidity and security upon the hearts of most men that they vvill not see the hand of God though they feel it and though God walks contrary to them yet they observe it not but rather walk contrary to him in a course of sin than meet him by repentance in the way of his judgments Now the less others are affected the more should we endeavour to affect our own hearts and to fast the more because they fast not at all and the more others are widening the breach to stand so much the more in the gap Ezek. 22.20 Now if we have these calls from God to this great duty of fasting and prayer let us not fail God herein and though we should obtain nothing for others yet we may deliver our own souls and we know the respect God had to those that sighed and mourned in Jerusalem that the Prophet was bid to set a peculiar mark upon them Ezek. 9.4 2 Chron. 20. And I shall only add this further word of encouragement i. e. That this extraordinary duty of Fasting hath been often answered with extraordinary success as Esthers fast when she went in to the King and Jehoshaphat's Fast when the Ammonites Moabites and Edomites invaded him and Ezra's fast ch 8.23 and upon Daniel's fasting he had the Angel Gabriel dispatched to him to give him understanding in the things he sought ch 9.22 and again upon his fasting in ch 10. he saw a vision wherein a man appear'd to him and told him that he was a man greatly beloved and from the first day that he set himself to understand and chasten himself before God his prayers were heard and sometimes where ordinary prayer hath not prevailed extraordinary hath had success which Christ intimates in saying This kind cannot be cast out but by fasting and prayer Mat. 17.21 Those that now fast and mourn in the Bridegrooms absence shall rejoyce with him for ever at his return then they shall feast but fast no more and the days of their mourning shall be ended as Christ said to his Disciples I will see you again and your heart shall rejoice and your joy no man taketh from you John 16.21 Though their present fasting and mourning hath a good in it beyond the worlds feasting and rejoycing yet the consequent of it makes it incomparably better The Bridegroom was once upon earth with his Church but departed and so gave her occasion of fasting and mourning but when he comes again he and his Church shall never fast and therefore fasting will then never come into season again as the fast of the 4th 5th 7th 10th month was to the house of Judah joy and gladness Zach. 8. so all the fasts kept by the people of God here on earth will be and that incomparably more joy and gladness to them in heaven and that for ever But to conclude all take these two Rules 1. Fasting being an extraordinary duty ought to be managed with an extraordinary exercise of grace Christ would have his Disciples endued with a greater measure of grace before he would put them upon this duty This new wine must be put into new bottles so that as Christ asked James and John concerned his Baptism are ye able to be baptized with my baptism so may we ask Christians now concerning fasting are ye able to keep a fast 2. Fasting ought to be followed with sincere and universal reformation elso it avails nothing The Jews fasting mention'd Isa 58. vvas rejected upon this account They vvent from their fasts to Strife Debate Oppression Covetousness and no wonder then that they complain and say why have we fasted and thou takest no notice Nay this reformation is so necessary that the denomination of a fast is attributed to it Isa 58.6 7. Is not this the Fast that I have chosen to loose the bands of wickedness to deal thy bread to the hungry c. If moral duties be neglected the practice of the strictest Institutions is unacceptable to God Quest How to manage secret Prayer that it may be prevalent with God to the comfort and satisfaction of the Soul Serm. XIV Math. 6.6 But thou when thou prayest enter into thy closet and when thou hast shut thy door pray to thy Father which is in secret and thy Father who seeth in secret shall reward thee openly WE have here our blessed Lord's instruction for the management of secret prayer the Crown and glory of a child of God wherein observe 1. The direction prescribed for our deportment in secret duty in three things 1. Enter thy closet the word 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Hesychius glosses by 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 a secret or recluse habitation and Suidas by 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 a hiding place for treasures by a Metonymy The LXX such as we have it turn the Hebrew word 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 so frequently by 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 that we need enquire no further as Gen. 43.30 Exod. 8.3 2 Sam. 13.10 1 Kings 1.15 and otherwhere for a chamber a parlour a bedchamber Sometimes the word 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 foramen caverna a hole cleft or cavern in a rock as Isaiah 42.22 which they render also by 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 and 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 rima The Etymon of the word being derived 〈◊〉
say I would my poor hungry child I would but I have it not Why then will you not come at me live together and eat together at my cost and care and charge and yet be whole months and never come at Me and that your children have reason raiment limbs not born blind nor of a monstrous birth which things Heathens have been affected with and a thousand ways besides have I done you good may God say Why then will you live whole years together and never together come at me Have you found one more able or more willing to do you good that you never can Why then are you so unthankful as not to come at me After the like manner the Lord expostulates with his People to whom he had been a bountiful Benefactor and yet they answered not his bounty nor served him their Benefactor for which he calls to the Heavens to be astonished and the Earth to be horribly afraid Jer. 2.5 Thus saith the Lord Mercies do engage to duties We should have him for our God for ever and serve him that always doth us good So the Poet. O Melibaec Deuo. nobis haec otia fecit Namque erit ille mihi semper Deus illius aram Saepe tener nostris ab ovilibus imbuet agnus Virg. Eclog. 1. Officia etiam saerae sentiunt nec ullum tam immansuetum animal est quod non cura mitiget in amorem sui vertat Leonum ora à magistris impunè tractantur Eliphantorum feritatem usque in servile obsequium demeretur cibus adeo etiam quae extra intellectum atque aestimationem bemeficii sunt posita assiduitas tamen meriti pertinacis evincit Ingratus est adversus unum beneficium adversus alterum non erit Duorum obliru est tertium etiam corum quae excideruâ—t memoriam reducet Qui instat onerat priora sequentibus etiam ex duto Immemori pectore gratiam extundat Nâ—o audebit adversus multa ocuâ—câ— allollere Senec. de benef c. 3. what iniquity have your Fathers found in me that they are gone far from me 6. Neither said they where is the Lord that brought us up out of the land of Egypt Should such a people forsake such a God and go far from him that did them so much good yet they did ver 13. Be astonished at this oh ye heavens You see when God is a Benefactor to a People and there is the same reason for Families and they do not serve him what monstrous wickedness it is God hath kept you all safe in the night and yet in the morning you do not say Where is the Lord that did preserve us come ô come Let us give joint praises to him God hath done you and your Families good so many years and yet you do not say where is the Lord that hath done such great things for us come let us acknowledg his mercy together God hath carried you through affliction and sickness in the Family the Plague hath been in the house and yet you live the Small pox and burning Feavors have been in your houses and yet you are alive your conjugal companion hath been sick and recovered children nigh to death and yet restored and for all this you do not say Where is the Lord that kept us from the Grave and saved us from the Pit that we are not rotten among the dead and yet you do not pray to nor pra se this your wonderful Benefactor together Let the very walls within which these ungrateful wretches live be astonished at this Let the very beams and pillars of their houses tremble and let the very girders of the floors on which they tread and walk be horribly afraid that such as dwell in such an House together go to bed before they go to Prayer together Let the earth be amazed that the Families which the Lord doth nourish and maintain are rebellious and unthankful Being worse than the very Ox that knoweth his Owner and of less understanding than the very Ass Isa 1.2 3. There is such validity in the consequence from God's being our Benefactor to our duty to him in serving of him that Joshua builds his exhortation to the Heads and People of Israel to fear and worship God upon this very foundation as appeareth plainly to any that read the Chapter where the Text lieth From what hath been said I reason in this manner 3. Arg. If God be the Founder Owner Governour and Benefactor of Families as such then Families as such are jointly to worship God and pray unto him This cannot be denied But God is the Founder Owner Governour and Benefactor of Families as such Neither can this be denied 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Aristot Moral Nunc adhibe puro Pectore verba puer nunc te melioribus affer Quo semel est imbuta recensâ— servabit odorem Testa diu Horat. Ep. l. 12. adeo in teneris consuescere mulâ—um est Virg Geor. l. 2. Therefore Families as such are jointly to worship God and pray unto him Argument 4. Masters of Families ought to read the Scripture to their Families teach and instruct their Children and Servants in the matters and doctrines of Salvation therefore they are to pray in and with their Families No man that will not deny the Scripture can deny the unquestionable duty of reading the Scripture in our houses Governours of Families teaching and instructing them out of the Word of God Amongst a multitude of express Scriptures look into these Exod. 12.26 And it shall come to pass when your Children shall say unto you what mean you by this service 27. Ye shall say it is the Sacrifice of the Lord 's Passeover who passed over the houses of the Children of Israel in Egypt when he smote the Egyptians and delivered our houses And there is as much reason that Christian Parents should explain to their Children the Sacraments of the New Testament to instruct them in the nature use and ends of Baptism and the Lord's Supper Deut. 6.6 And these words which I command thee this day shall be in thine heart 7. v. And thou shalt teach * Crebris admonitionum quasi ictibus haec mea praecepta infiges optabis sicut repetitis mallei ictibus fâ—rram aptatur Lud. de Dieu Et dentabis ea i. e. inter dentes versabis assidue lo queris vel dentibus mandes praemansa in os ingeres filiis tuis Malvend 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 whet or sharpen them diligently to thy children and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thy house and when thou walkest in the way and when thou liest down and when thou risest up i. e. morning and evening Deut. 11.18 19. Ephes 6.4 And ye Fathers provoke not your Children to wrath but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. And God was pleased with this in Abraham Gen. 18.19 For I know him that he will command his children and his houshold after him and they
conjunct Prayer of a domestick combination which is concerning Isaac Gen. 25.21 We read it And Isaac entreated the Lord for his Wife Heb. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Two words especially make for our purpose Ea praesente unà cum illa Junius Simul cum uxore cum qua communicabat preces Fagi 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 orare quidem significat sed non simpliciter quia assiduitatem importunitatem simul connotat precum multiplicationem Res convenit non enim dubium est tam longo tempore Isaacum saepiâ—â—s interpellasse Deum fretum spe promissionum Rivet in loc That vvhich is translated for his Wife might be read with his Wife in the presence of his Wife being vvith him and joining with him in this duty He prayed for and before his Wife it was then conjunct Prayer Isaac praying with his Wife The other vvord translated entreated signifieth to multiply powerful words in Prayer to pour out vvords in abundance and denoteth 1. The multiplying of his Prayers it was not only once but frequently that he pray'd with his Wife 2. The earnestness of his Prayer 3. The continuance and their perseverance therein till they had the mercy prayed for as follows and the Lord was entreated of him Isaac had been married near twenty years with Rebekah and so long without a child so that it seems they had been exercised in this duty for many years upon this account that Rebekah had no child for so long time for which they did unanimously and constantly offer up prayers to God and if they prayed together for issue should not you for the favour of God pardon of sin interest in Christ and eternal life By all you see that there was Family conjunct worship and praying to God by God's command and appointment and approved by God's acceptance of it Now let any one shew where God hath taken off this obligation if God hath any where said though I did appoint Adam to worship me in his Family and did accept of Abel 's offering that did as I commanded and did hear Isaac praying together with his wife yet now I will be prayed to in Families no more shew it if you can What book chapter and verse is it Obj. Will you say that the reason of their worshipping God in their Families at first was because there was no other to worship him with but when men did multiply and there were publick Assemblies men were not bound to do it Ans 1 Shew that Which is the Text that tells you that God's instituting of Publick Worship hath disobliged men from praying to God in their Families Ans 2 When men were multiplied Godly men did serve God in their Families Abraham did and Isaac did and Job did and Joshua did and Cornelius did Did they do it and were they not bound to do it What will you make of all the Worship and Prayers which these did give and offer up to God in their Houses If there was no obligation upon them they had not sinned if they had omitted it and it was no obedience when they did so Will you say either of these What! Were they Works of Supererogation No surely But when Aaron 's Priesthood was instituted Object then the obligation on Families ceased and after that the Israelites did not pray in their Houses Why will you speak without Book Shew me this either Answ I have proved an obligation by God's institution shew me where it is nulled and made void even after the Aaronical Priesthood was instituted But I say they did pray in their houses after this for after the institution of Aaron's Priesthood the Israelites celebrated the Passeover in their own Houses and that was not done without Prayer For though after the Priesthood was setled the Priests killed the Lamb yet after the Lamb was killed the Master of the house caused it to be brought back to his own house and did eat it with his Family Luke 22.7 8.9 10. And the Cup that was used at the Passeover whether it were Sacramental or no is controverted was blessed by the Master of the Family Weemes so that there was Prayer and Praise attending this celebration in their Houses conjunctly after the Priesthood was setled in which service they had also the expâ—ication of it why they kept it what was the meaning of the bitter herbs and why eaten with unleavened bread done in form of Catechizing Godw. Jew Antiq and in their Feasts the Master of the House prayed before and after after he gave thanks 1 For their present food 2 For their deliverance from Egyptian bondage 3 For the Covenant of Circumcision 4 For the Law given by the ministry of Moses then he prayed that God would have mercy 1 On his People Israel 2 On his own City Jerusalem 3 On Sion the Tabernacle of his Glory 4 On the Kingdom of the House of David his anointed 5 That he would send Elias the Prophet 6 That he would make them worthy of the days of the Messiah and of the life of the World to come Do you not call this conjunct Prayer and Praise thus done by the Master of the Family May we not now with confidence of the truth from all under this last Topick or Head of Argument frame this manner of reasoning Arg. 6. If serving of God and praying conjunctly to him in proper Families was commanded and appointed by God and never yet revoked then it is the duty of proper Families so to do But serving of God and praying to him conjunctly in proper Families was commanded and appointed by God and never yet revoked Therefore it is the duty of proper Families so to do Pareus Deorum cultor infrequem Insanientis dum sapientiae Consultus erro nunc retrorsum vela dare atque iterare cursus cogor relictos Horat. lib. 1. Od. 34. So much for the first Question Question Second Whether it be the duty of Families jointly to pray to God daily Aff. Some that are convinced that Family Prayer is a duty vvill sometimes practice it and yet but seldom some upon the Lord's Day and yet but once then in the Evening and that serves for all the week till the evening of the Lord's day next doth come Others pray once a day through the week but omit it in the morning when yet the very same reasons which should move them to do it at all should be cogent for more frequent performance of it and are so Though it be not determined expresly in the Scripture that Christian Families should pray together morning and evening every day yet in the general it is required that we should continue in Prayer Col. 4.2 which seems to be meant of Family Prayer For the Apostle had been speaking to Family relations Husbands and Wives Parents and Children Masters and Servants and treating of Family relative duties carrying on his speech still to the same persons saith continue in Prayer but such as
carelesness and sloth provoke him while we kneel before him Thus Job prepared his houshold Solennis erat apud Ethnicos mos lâ—vandi manus ante sacrificandum â—ut 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 idem ac 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 apud quosdam significet when he with them did sacrifice to God Job 1.5 Job sent and sanctified them and rose up early in the morning and offered Burnt-offerings according to the number of them all thus did Job continually Could Job sanctifie his Children could Job give them grace Parents might give their Children portions but can they give them holiness too they might put money into their purses but can they put goodness into their hearts yea they may advise and exhort them to get grace but can they work it too 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Hom. Iliad l. 6. Is not this bestowed by God the Author of all Grace How then did Job sanctifie his children The meaning is that Job did what he could to prepare and dispose them for the religious duties they were entring upon So the word Sanctifie is often used Exod. 19.22 Let the Priests sanctifie themselves 2 Chron. 30.25 and the Priests and Levites were ashamed and sanctified themselves 17. many that were not sanctified all is explained by Hezekiah's prayer v. 18. The good Lord pardon every one that prepareth his heart to seek the Lord God of his fathers though he be not cleansed according to the purification of the Sanctuary Direction VI. 6. It will be useful to this purpose Cui aliis in precando praecunáum sedulò perquirat quae apud suos obtinent peccata quibus maximè indigent gratiae quibus exercentur tentationes quae illos cujuscu que generis premunt grâ—vamina quae illis imminent judicia quae in illos indies confert Deus beneficia hand aliter suis se inter orandum accomodabit qui non haec omnia in numerato habet Bowl past Evan. that the Master of the Family understand the spiritual condition of every one in the Family that he may put up requests suitable to their condition Let him get a particular knowledg of their wants doubts fears temptations afflictions of soul of their sins as far as is convenient and the mercies of God towards them for as it is for the spiritual benefit of a people that their Minister understand the state of his flock that so he might study for them and preach to them pray for them and with them according as their case requires so it will be for the benefit of a Family to have their particular cases spread before the Lord in Prayer Direction VII 7. Keep seasonable hours for Family Prayer and take the fittest time when all might be most free from distraction and disturbance In the morning put it not off too long lest by worldly occasions it be put quite by Be not too late at night when the Family after weariness by their Callings all the day will be more fit to sleep than to pray Late Prayers are too commonly sleepy Prayers one asleep in one place and another in another and it may be the Master of the Family himself prays between sleeping and waking Be not clubbing abroad when you should be praying at home This is in the power of the Governour of the house to remedy the other being to be at the hour appointed by him Direction VIII 8. Spend so much time in Family Prayer that those that joyn might be affected but not so much as to be wearied with the duty Be not too short nor yet too tedious Not too short for the heart is not easily tuned nor the affections warmed nor the mind brought into frame our wants are many and our sins are many and some time must be spent to get the heart sensible of them and of God's mercies to us To rise up from your knees before these can be probably done is to come away no better than you went unto it This overhasty brevity argues but little delight in the duty and sheweth you care not how soon you get out of God's special presence I doubt such as thus slubber over Family Prayer with so much haste * Vt canis è Nilo do it because they may be said to do it to stop the mouths of others and the mouth of their own Conscience with the work done And yet too much prolixity and length of the duty may have its inconveniencies also 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Pos and make it to some graceless persons in the Family or to others that are good but wearied in their daily Callings before to be burthensome and they more backward to it But the most do not err on this hand therefore to say little here will be enough and leave it to the prudence of the Governour to consider the persons that joyn and other concurring Circumstances and to act accordingly So much for the Directions for the Master of the Family Secondly The Directions for such as are to joyn in Family Prayer for their greater benefit Let them be careful Direction I. 1. Direct That they be all present at the beginning of a duty and continue till it be ended In some Families there is great disorder in this respect Servants either by reason of the backwardness of their hearts for want of love to and delight in Prayer or by not wisely forecasting their business come when the Prayer is half over or else go out before it is ended or if at the beginning and end yet to look after one thing or other make breaches and interruptions in the Prayer by going out and coming in once or twice or more in the Prayer-time which if possible should be carefully avoided for Family Prayer being ordinarily not very long to lose any part of it cannot but be to the detriment and disadvantage of such persons for when their affections begin to be warmed by these interruptions they are cooled and damped again You should be more willing to go to your Prayer than to your meat when hungry by how much your Souls are better than your bodies and serving God better than feeding of the body If business come when we are eating at our Table we commonly let it stay till we have done what business shall wait upon you in that case let it do so also in the other that you might not lose the benefit of the Prayer Numa Pompilius made a Law amongst the Romans that men should not serve the Gods as they passed by or were in haste or did any other business but that they should worship and pray to them when they had time and leasure and all other business set apart Plutarch Direction II. 2. Direct When you are present at Family Prayer give diligent attention and mind what confessions of sins are made what petitions are put up and what praises are returned to God for mercies received The Devil will be striving that you may be absent in Prayer when you are *
yet we perish much through our Parents and Masters neglect There stands my Father saith the Son and there stands my Master saith the Servant that never prayed with us we do accuse them they never did and they cannot say they did Will you not then wish you had never been Parents to such Children nor Masters to such Servants As you would avoid this be faithful to your trust and mindful of your duty lest thou wish O Vtinam coelebs mansissem ac prole carerem MOTIVE III. 3. Consider You have but a little time before you for the performance of this trust You and your Families shall live together but a while and if once you are parted by death it will be too late whether you die first or some of them 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Theoc. Sâ—es est in vivis non est spes ulla sepultiâ— 1. Suppose some of them dye before you if your Conscience be not feared and your hearts past feeling will you not be almost distracted when you follow them to their Graves to reflect and consider here is one dead out of my house with whom I never prayed we did dwell together and eat together and work together many years but we never prayed together Oh! what if his Soul be gone to Hell through my neglect What if he be damned and I be found guilty of his damnation Prayer was a means appointed by God to have done him good but I did not do it who knows if I had called him to Prayer and I had been confessing sin but God might have broke his heart for sin and given him repentance of which I saw no sign before he died And now Oh! what now if there be one Soul the less in my house and one the more in Hell Oh! this is that which wounds my Soul this is that for which my Conscience now doth sting me that when I had him with me I did not do my duty and now he is gone he is gone and now it is too late O my child my child whither art thou gone whither art thou gone O that he may live with me again were it but for a year or two a month or two that we might do together our before neglected duty If you be wise timely prevent such uncomfortable reviews 2. Suppose you die before them for if they do not die and leave you you must die and leave them and can you die without trembling for anguish of your heart without terrours in your Souls and fearful gripes in your Consciences more bitter than the pangs of Death to consider you leave a wicked prayerless Family behind you through your own neglect Would it not trouble you to leave them poor Wife and Children nothing to live upon if this hath been through your sloth and will it not should it not much more trouble you to leave an ignorant Wife Children and Servants unacquainted with God unaccustomed to prayer and all through your neglect Might you not then say if I had left them poor yet if I had left them good and fearing God and given to prayer by my example I could now have died with joy and left them all with comfort but now I lie a dying it is the wounding of my Soul to take so sad a farewel of my Family If I do live it shall be otherwise if I recover and God trust me with life and time yet further I will hereafter do it but my heart is sick my Spirits fail me and I perceive the symptomes of death are upon me and though I am loth to take my leave of my Wife and Children because I have been no more careful of the good of their Souls yet I see I must I must bid farewel unto them Come then dear Wife farewel Gemitúquo haec addidit alio Non alias hinc ad lacrymas Fata vocant Salve aeternum aeternúmque vâ—le Virg. Aeneid l. xi farewel I shall now be no longer thine and thou shalt be no longer mine but this had been no matter if I and thou had both been his whom we should have prayed unto together but we did not Woe is me poor dying man that we did not Farewel dear Children now farewel adieu adieu for ever but oh how shall I take my leave of you with whom I have not done what God required But yet I must whether I will or no I must now leave you But let me give among you what I have gotten for you Therefore to you my Wife I give so much and to this Child so much and to that so much But when I think I worked for you but never prayed with you this doth trouble me Oh! this doth trouble my departing Soul However you will have my Goods the grave and worms shall have my body but who oh who must now have my Soul This will be a sad parting when ever it shall come and yet this parting hour is a coming Pray now with them and in that manner too that then you may be comforted On the contrary if you discharge your duty faithfully and unfeignedly whether your Family be good or bad when you shall die you might take comfort that you did your duty So Mr. Bolton that was abundant in conjunct Prayers in his Family could comfort himself and did say on his Death-bed to his Children I think verily none of you dare think to meet me at the great Tribunal in an unregenerate condition MOTIVE IV. 4. The love that you should bear unto your Families should engage you often to pray together with them Diligatur Proles non ut nascatur tantum verum-etiam ut renascatur nascitur enim ad paenam nisi renascatur ad vitam Aug. de nupt conc l. 1. cap. 17 Ipsae ferae saevae immanes bestiae prolem nutrire solent at non tantùm curare debent parentes ut liberi sui vivant sed etiam ut Deo benè vivant Ames Cas Cons Will you shew your love unto your Children in providing Portions for them that they may live in credit in this life and will you not so much as pray with them that they may live in glory in the life to come Will you do much for their Bodies and nothing for their Souls You that are fondest Husbands and Fathers never love Wife and Children as you ought till you love their Souls The Soul is the best and more noble part and love to the Soul is the best and more noble Love But to love the Body and neglect the Soul is but cruel brutish Love What do you more for your young ones than the birds and beasts do for theirs Do you feed their bodies do not birds and beasts do the same for theirs Love your Wife Children and Servants as you ought and this will provok you to pray together with them MOTIVE V. Oeconomia est veluti paradisus in quo plantantur arbores quarum fructus odore dulcore suo imbuunt omnes vitae
ordines Alsted Qualis est enjús quo domus talis est universa civitas 5. Consider that Family Reformation is a necessary means to publick Reformation and to hand down Religion from one generation to another Reformation begins with Persons thence is carried on to Families thence to Parishes thence to Towns and so to Cities and to Kingdoms but when these consist of Families how can there be a reformation of Cities and Kingdoms without a Reformation of Persons and Families You complain of the badness of the times and age in which you live and that no more care is taken to mend what is amiss why do you not reform your own houses Why do you not amend what is amiss in your own Families If you have not power to reform a Parish City or Kingdom yet you have a power to reform your own houses If Religion die in Families will it not die in Cities too and in Kingdoms too Will not you do your utmost to keep Religion alive to recover it when decaying or shall it be extinguished with this Generation God forbid Or do you see nothing amiss in your houses to be reformed what no praying there and yet nothing amiss there Certainly there is Let yours then have a pattern and example of Family-Prayer from you to do the same in their houses and their Children from them and so let it pass from one age to another An effectual way to keep the City clean will be for every house to sweep before their own door MOTIVE VI. 6. If Religious Duties are not set up in your Families Neglectis urenda filix innascitur agris Horat. Sermo lib. 1. Satyr 3. there will be the more sinning there and wickedness abounding in them How much cursing is there in many Families where there is no praying The field that is not dressed and manured is full of weeds and thorns Where God is not served the Devil is If in your houses God hath not a Church the Devil will have a Chappel What hopes will the Devil have Da mihi quaeso animas caetera sume tibi that he shall have Souls out of those Families where there is much sinning and no praying And if he might have their Souls he will be content that you may have all the rest If your houses be not nurseries for Heaven they will be breeding places for Hell If Souls under your roof are not prepared for Salvation they will there be fitted for Damnation and is this nothing to you Awake arise you drousie Governers of Families to your work and duty MOTIVE VII 7. It would be an effectual way and means to make those in your Families more obedient and better towards you if you would call on them to serve the Lord and you were more in Prayer with them You cry out of stubborn ann disobedient Children They grieve and break my heart saith one I have a Child that is my daily wound and sorrow saith another and Servants never worse is your often complaint Who is all this long of do not you read your sin in your punishment If you had taught them better their duty towards God they would have made more Conscience of their duty towards you if you had prayed with them God might have bowed their hearts as a return to your Prayers to have walked more suitable to their relative duties I have read of a young man going to the Gallows desired to speak with his Mother in her ear who bit off her ear with his teeth crying out against her as the cause of his death by your negligence saith he I am come to this woful end If you are alike careless of your Families if you do not lose your ears by your own Children yet you might lose something that is better MOTIVE VIII 8. If you make profession of Religion Aliud in titulo aliud in ptxide Pelliculam veterem retines fronte politus Astutam rapido servas sub pectore vulpem Pers Sat. 5. and yet do not pray in your Families it is base and cursed hypocrisie When you hear with God's people and pray with them and receive with them and seem to be devout abroad and do not pray with your Families at home is not this to make others believe you are what you are not Do you not profess by your joynt duties with God's people in all Ordinances that you are devoted unto God and doth not he that sincerely devotes himself to God devote also all he hath to him but is your Family devoted to God when there is no worship there It would be well if you were found out that you were denyed the Supper of the Lord for want of a sufficient credibility of a sound Profession But is it your way to be zealous abroad and negligent at home Let your house speak for you Sed videt hunc omnis domus Introsum turpem speciosum pelle decorâ MOTIVE IX Plus valet humanis viribus ira Dei Ovid. Trist Anno 1584 terra motu mons quidam in ditione Bernatum ultra alios montes violenter latus pagum quâ—ndam nonaginta familias habentem contexit totum dimidia domo excepta in qua pater-familias cum uxore liberis in genua provolutus Deum invocabat Polan Syntagm de terrae mot 9. The neglect of calling upon God in your Families will bring the curse of God upon them Jer. 10.25 Pour out thy fury upon the Families that call not upon thy Name 1. The persons threatned are Families which if in this Text comprehendeth many housholds or yet more largely taken yet there is the same parity of reason to a proper Family 2. Their crime is not calling upon the name of God 3. The thing threatned the fury of the Lord fury is fervent anger anger in it's height and rage 4. The abundance of it it shall not fall drop by drop upon prayerless Families but pour down in great showrs upon them Whereas the way to have God's blessing and protection over you and your houshold is to set up the worship of God therein There is a passage in a worthy Divine of a remarkable Providence of God to this purpose concerning a Town consisting of ninety houses that was in the year 1584. destroyed by an Earthquake except the half of one house where the Master of the Family was earnestly praying with his Wife and Children upon their bended knees to God Obj. But we see no such thing we perceive not but those Families prosper that have no Prayer in them as much as those that do Answ God is often angry when he doth not strike and punish presently the Offender but his wrath hangs over your house and you are never safe in your greatest prosperity N n est quare cuiquam quem dignum poena putaveris optes ut infestos habeat Deos habet inquam etiamsi videtur eorum favore produci Senec. Epist An Heathen could say If a wicked man prosper you need not
laetissimum affectum O securissimum amorem Dei quem Zelus non excruciat quem rivalis delectat sine absynthio sine aloe sine felle totus dulcis consentaneus cordi Nieremb de art vol. p. 336 337. Dost thou not pray alone without God without meeting with God Hadst thou there had thy heart enflamed with the love of God and tasted of the sweetness in communion with God would not this have filled thy heart with love to God and Souls in thy house and burning zeal that they might be partakers of the same Divine refreshments could'st thou hold thy peace after such discoveries while thy poor Family are without or would'st thou no time call them together that they also might experience the same delights that thou hast found As the woman of Samaria call'd her Neighbours Joh. 4.28 29. If thou hadst got some earthly Jewel thou might'st be loth that others should share with thee in the value of it because in earthly things participation causeth a diminution if a sum of money be divided amongst many the more one hath the less will fall to the others share Art thou indeed afraid of this Fear it not There is enough in God for thee and thine too Communication in spirituals causeth multiplication even in him that doth communicate to others If thou bee'st an Instrument to draw thine to the Love of God and to joy and delight in him this would fill thee with the greater joy Methinks then when thou hast been alone and God hath graciously been with thee thou shouldest go down into thy Family with burning love to God and them and say Come my Wife Children Servants leave your work and business for a while There is much sweetness in communion with God There is indeed delight which comes into the Soul by holy fervent Prayer I would not have you feed on husks while there is not only bread but dainties too in seeking God I do not love to see you always mudling in the world and be strangers unto God Come then come away for my Soul doth long that you should tast what I have found Thus thou wouldest think surely with thy self if thou speakest not out to them if thou didst meet with God in secret When it is not so with thee but thou can'st constantly neglect Prayer in thy Family reflect upon thy self whether in this sense thou didst not pray alone that thou didst not find God with thee warming of thy heart Tell me could'st thou be content to eat thy food constantly alone without thy Wife and Children and can'st thou be content to pray alone only As you eat together so pray together also Obj. 3. But I am ashamed to pray with others and that hinders me Answ 1. Ashamed to pray ashamed to do thy duty The more shame for thee Be ashamed to sin and of this shame for it is sinful and is to be lamented and prayed against and striven against and overcome Wilt thou tell God at the Day of Judgment that thou wast ashamed to pray in thy House and Family 2. But why ashamed when you are only with your own Family and those you daily converse withal and are head and chief and governer of 3. It is for want of use set upon the work and you will quickly overcome this Obj. 4. But I am not ashamed of the duty but of my own weakness I have not gifts and parts to manage this duty If I were gifted as other men be I would perform it as other men do Answ 1. Where do you live in London What! an old housekeeper in London or where there hath been much means of Grace and are you so ignorant that you are not qualified to pray in your Family This is your sin and will one sin be pleadable to excuse you from another One of the Ancients of the Parish and plead ignorance are you not asham'd 2. It is not parts and gifts and florid expressions that God looks at but an humble penitent broken and believing heart Have you not this neither If you have not get it quickly or you must to Hell If you have God will accept of such a Sacrifice bring it then 3. Study your sins and wants and mercies and get a sense of all these upon your heart and you will be able to express them in your Family in such a manner as may be more for their profit than the constant omission can be If a man feel himself sick or hungry do you think he could not find words to make his complaint and ask for help Study the Scripture and your own hearts and these will be good prayer-Books to furnish you for the duty Besides by praying you shall learn to pray 4. Do not deceive your self and say it is for want of gifts when it is more for want of a heart and love to the duty To discover this Suppose a Law were made by our Governours that every Master of a Family that doth not pray in his house with his Family shall be cast into the Lions Den What would you do then Would you rather venture your life and be torn in pieces by Lions than set upon this duty with that Knowledg and those Gifts that now you have Would you not find something to say to save your Lives And is not the Law of God as binding as the Laws of men and the Dungeon of Hell as dreadful as the Lions Den Go then set upon your duty Obj. 5. But there are some graceless and wicked persons in my Family that I cannot say we desire this or that spiritual blessing grace Christ c. for I see no ground to judge they desire any such thing Answ 1. Have they no grace and must they not pray that they may have some O cruelty Is he exempted from duty because he is not good or wilt thou say that such must only pray alone and be excluded while such from conjunct prayers Whither will this carry you Even to the shutting of all graceless or at least visibly wicked persons from all prayers in publick Congregations as well as from Family duty But this is so gross that I suppose you will not own it You have no reason then for the other 2. How do you know when you are confessing sin and acknowledging the evil of it but God might affect and break their hearts and they be changed on their knees and so be saved from damnation and will you deny them that means that God may bless for their conversion 3. Do you indeed use all other means to your utmost power to have them better Do you reprove them and shew them the danger they are in and perswade them to turn from sin to God and this with constancy and compassion to their Souls Or do you scruple this too Wilt thou neither pray with them nor speak to them when thou oughtest to do both I doubt it is thy sloth that hinders thee or the wickedness of thy heart and that thou pleadest
puer Improbus ille But if the profane Parents and Masters amongst us will not reform and pray in their houses shall I not prevail with many of you Professors that have been shamefully guilty of this neglect Then pluck off your visard of Profession abroad and tell us what you are Do not deceive us any longer and make the world believe you are that which you are not but let us know what you are What shall I say Will nothing prevail Then they that are for hell are for hell and we cannot help it But it will be more profitable for you and your Families that you be really and indeed what you have with much zeal abroad professed your selves to be I pray you be better in your houses and act as men resolved for Heaven and to have all your Family with you there However if any do miscarry let it not be by your neglect And as for you that have and do make conscience of this duty go on and the Lord be with you go on Sirs hold out it is but a little while and your praying shall be turned into perfect praising go on that your Children might bless God that they had such Parents and your Servants bless God that they had such Masters and that ever they came under your roof and lived within the walls of your house you will have comfort when you come to dye in the review of holy diligence and might leave them with peace which will be better to you than all the world Keep fast then your resolution That while you live you and your house will serve the Lord. What are the Duties of Husbands and Wives towards each other Serm. XVI Ephes 5.33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his Wife as himself and the Wife see that she reverence her Husband MY business is to declare from this Scripture What are the Duties of Husbands and Wives towards each other A Subject of manifest Vse and Need For as this Relation is the †〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Hieroc de nupt p. 210. Foundation of all others in the world so the right discharge of the Duties hereof doth greatly promote the like in all the rest But here it is easier to Direct than to Perswade and harder to please Man than God And you know We must be faithful to Him and we must be faithful to you and you must labour to bring your Will to the Rule and not to bring the Rule to your Will And your Rule is laid down in these words Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his Wife as himself and the Wife see that she reverence her husband Wherein you have 1. The Connexion Nevertheless that is to say (a) So Zanch. Musc in loc leaving that mystery of the spiritual Marriage let every one of you c. Or (b) 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 veruntamen Trem. Vulg. caeterùm Gagn. notwithstanding that the Copy propos'd ver 15. of Christ's love to his Church is so superlative and above your reach yet let every one of you so love his Wife as himself unless we understand it illatively and read it (c) So Dutch Annot Bez. Ham. in loc So then or therefore q. d. the sum and short of what is said amounts to this that (d) Non dicit verùm vos sed verùm vos q.d. sicut Christus Ecclesiam suam dilexit Zanch Musc in loc as Christ loved his Church so every one of you c. 2. The Direction in the rest of the verse let every one of you c. Wherein you see 1. The Vniversal Obligation of it let every one of you which might with some ordinary supplement to the (e) Graecis Latinis deest aliquid hic supplendum viz. vos singuli id praestate Gagn. So our old Translation Greek make a sentence of it self thus let every one of you though you be never so good and though they be never (f) Sive hae formosae sint sive deformes sive divites sive pauperes sive morigerae sive immorigerae ad unum omnes Zanch. Musc in loc so bad look to this do you this 2. The particular Application of it in particular what hath been determin'd in general let it be applied by every one to themselves For both these passages may well respect both Husband and Wife and do import that each of them should study and practice their particular Duty 3. The Summary Description of each of these their Duties And 1. Here is the sum of every husband's Duty To love his Wife Indeed this is not All but this is the chief of All this will fulfill All. And to this is added an excellent Clause as himself which may pass both for a Rule and for a Reason 1. For a Rule for he that may not know How our Saviour loved his Church yet cannot but know (g) 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Chrysost in loc how he should love himself why let him love his Wife as himself 2. For a Reason for it being certain that a mans wife is a great part of himself that they are but (h) 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Id. in Coloss hom 12. Two in One let every one of you love his wife as himself 2. Here is the sum of every Wife's Duty And the Wife see that she reverence her husband Where the word see is added in our Translation as a convenient (i) Ellipsis sub 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 aut tale Camer in loc supplement to the sense though it be not in the Letter of the Greek But the Substance of the Wife's Duty is here concluded to be Reverence as we translate it though most others read it (k) 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 So Dutch Annot. Vulg. Beza c. Fear And doubtless intends that inward Respect to the Place and Person of an husband which inclines them to a voluntary (l) 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 doctrina de reverentiae cultu quo is qui inferior est superiorem colit Beza in loc Fear i. e with respect and awe be subject to him Dutch Nusquam erit voluntaâ—ia subjâ—ctio nisi praecedat reverentia Calv. in loc subjection and an agreeable behaviour Which Reverence or Fear is so far from excluding Love that it both supposeth it and is an effect of it For when we love we study to please and fear to offend And though there be no express Explication of this Duty of the Wife as there was of the Husband 's who is charg'd to love his wife as himself yet there is an implicit Direction to the Wife in her duty to her Husband namely to reverence him and to be subject to him as unto her (m) She to behave her self reverently to her husband as to her Head Ham. in loc Head So that our Lesson hence is plain which is this DOCTR Doctr. That Every Husband should love his Wife as himself and every Wife should
pauper te divite quodque inter amicos contingere non potest quomodo in tanta amoris animorum copula contingeâ— Lud. Vives de off mar sick in one anothers sickness The husband must improve all his skill and strength to procure a competence of estate and the wife all hers to help and further it The Reputation of the wife the husband must tender as the apple of his eye and the wife must every way advance the good name of her husband And in short the Holy Ghost hath determined that he that is married careth for the things of the world how he may please his wife and she that is married careth for the things of the world (f) Circa ejus lectum sunt sacra omnia ibi arae ibi Deus ubi pax concordia charitas Deum facilè tibi amicum reddes si hominem reddideris Lud. Viv. de Christ. foem p. 710. how she may please her husband 1 Cor. 7. 33 34. This will bring honour to Religion comfort to their lives and a blessing on all they have This will make them digest all the pains and troubles of that condition seeing they find two to be better than one and do never miss of a sweet and constant (g) Summus autem amicitiae gradus est foedus conjugale Melan. l. c. friend in their bosom Without this care the one will be a perpetual burden to the other and a daily torment When the one is unconcern'd in the others trials when the one gathers and the other scatters when the one blasts the others reputation when one perpetually crosseth and vexeth the other There follows a Hell of disquiet in the mind ordinarily a blast upon the estate besides guilt and shame unspeakable Think therefore often God hath made us One if my wife be sick I am not half well if my husband be poor I cannot be rich if he be discontent how can I be content we 'l laugh and weep together nothing but Death shall separate our Affections or Interests 9. Mutual Prayer Hence the Apostle Peter 1 Pet. 3.7 advises that their Prayers be not hindred which implies that they should pray for and with one another Thus Isaac is said Gen. 25.21 to 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 h Verba fudit magna copia ante è regione ante oculos multiply prayers with or before his wife and it follows how prevalent these prayers were This Common Debt we owe to all much more to them that are so nearly united to us The purest love is written in Prayer This Duty must constantly be done for and frequently with each other No better preservative of real love and peace than praying together There they must bewail their failings in their conjugal Relations the (i) Cum vero non amor procreandae sobolis sed voluâ—tas dominatur in opere commixtionis habeant conjuges etiam de commixione sua quod defleant Lombard l. 4. d. 31. pollutions that cleave to the marriagebed There they should beg the blessing of Children and blessings upon their Children a blessing upon their Estates and especially all spiritual blessings in heavenly things in Christ upon their souls Who knows but that God may touch the heart of the Wife when the husband is pouring out prayers for her Certainly they are in the discharge of their duty to which God hath annexed a promise And it will be the wisdom of them both to espy Fit times for their joynt-Prayers if they cannot keep Pace with Holy Mr. Bolton who prayed twice daily alone twice with his Wife and twice with his Family And herein consider what particular grace or mercy your Relation wants what sin and temptation they are most liable to and press God with an humble importunity in the case till your prayer be answered You owe each other a spiritual as well as as a matrimonial love and if you only eat and drink together what do you more than others do not the Beasts of the field so If your love reach only to the body and the things of this life do not the Publicans the same but if you love one anothers souls and be restless after the salvation thereof you do more than others and your labour shall not be in vain in the Lord. And thus you have heard a plain Breviate of these Common Duties which Husbands and Wives should discharge towards each other I follow now the Order of my Text to declare in the Second place the special Duty of the Husband in this Position namely The great Duty of every Husband is to Love his own Wife This is the foundation of all the rest this must be mixed with all the rest this is the Epitome of all the rest of his Duty And hence this is expresly mentioned four times in this Chapter vers 25 28 33. as being the great wheel which by its motion carries about all the other wheels of the affections that are within us and the actions that are without us Fix but this blessed Habit in the heart and it will teach a man yea it will enforce a man to all that tenderness honour care and kindness that is required of him These are but the beams from that Sun they are but the fruits from that root of real Love that is within Love suffereth long and is kind it envies not is not puffed up seeks not her own is not easily provoked thinketh none evil beareth all things 1 Cor. 13.4 6. It is here as it is in Love to God which you know doth both instruct and thrust a man on to the utmost of his Duty excluding those wary fears wherewith hypocrites abound lest they should do too much Even so Love to a man's Wife suggests all fit expressions thereof and carries a man to perform the highest effects of it when as the want of this causes him to dispute every inch of God's command and to be jealous of every prescription I shall trace this comprehensive Grace or Duty 1. In its nature and property 2. In its Pattern 3. In its effects which done you will see that the greatest part if not all the Husbands Duty is contained in Loving his Wife as himself 1. For the First The Nature and Property of this Love It is Conjugal true aed genuine such as is peculiar to this Relation Not that fondness which is proper in Children nor the brutish lust which is peculiar to Beasts but that which is right and true 1. For the ground of it which is the near Relation which Gods Ordinance hath now brought him into and his will revealed in his Word Such was the Love of Isaac to Rebeka Gen. 24.67 She became his Wife and he loved her The Ordinance of God hath made her (k) Not only by original creation so she is part of his flesh but by nuptial coâ—junction so she is one flesh Gatak Serm. p. 200. One Flesh with me and the Law of Nature obligeth me to love my own flesh
potion too hot the operation is hindred and his labour worse than lost Admirable was the carriage of Job Job 2.10 when his wife had highly offended him with her words yet hear how mildly he rebukes her Not thou wicked Caitiff but thou speakest like one of the foolish women Sooner or later if she be not brutish she will be thankful and amend 3. The husbands Love must be demonstrated by ready incouragement of his wife when she doth well Prov. 31.28 Her Husband also he praiseth her He that is discreet and faithful herein perhaps taketh the readiest way to do her good For such is the weakness of many that they ever think that reproof proceeds either from an ill Opinion or want of Affection in the husband but when they shall find that he is as ready to incourage them when they do well they are convinc'd and reformed 4. The husbands Love is seen by seasonable comforting his wife in affliction whether it be in mind or body So did Elkanah 1 Sam. 1.8 Hannah why weepest thou and why eatest thou not and why is thy heart grieved am I not better to thee then ten Sons and this brought her to her meat as you may see in the next verse And generally a kind word from an husbands mouth doth good like a medicine And that Husband is worse than a Tigre that supports not his poor Wife at such a time In her troubles of mind he must be her Casuist in weakness of body he must be her Comforter 2. The Effects of an husbands Love to his wife must be in Deed also And that 1. By making Provision for her both of what is necessary and also of what is convenient for her according to his ability Exod. 21.10 Her food and her raiment and her duty of marriage he shall not diminish Not that she hath any priviledg to be maintain'd in Idleness or like a Drone live upon the industry of her husband without adding her helping hand But the main care hereof must lye upon her husband And this is probably (z) So Gataker Hammond concluded to be at least a part of that honour 1 Pet. 3.7 due to the wife as the weaker Vessel the best kind of honour to wit maintenance so that word is frequently (a) Matth. 15.6 1 Tim. 5 2. taken and the reason added carries it this way namely she is the weaker Vessel not able to support her self but depends upon her husband who must therefore give her honour that is maintenance as the weaker Vessel She hath not that wisdom forecast or strength for such purposes as he hath and therefore as he hath the strongest obligation upon him and the greatest advantages he must lay about him by all lawful means to support and provide for her And that not only for her maintenance while he lives but he ought to make provision for her as far as he is able after his departure hence for so did Jesus Christ for his Church And the Husband ought to shew his Love herein by the freedom and chearfulness of his Supplies to the wants of his wife neither doing it grudgingly nor niggardly but rather if he be able intrusting her with some pittance in her own disposal that she may have occasion to exercise her charity and to incourage her Children or Servants in their duty 2. This Conjugal Love is to be shewed in the Tenderness of the husband towards the wife And this Duty is incumbent on him as he is the Head of the wife 1 Cor. 11.3 the head of every woman is the man And hence the husband is bound to Protect his wife from dangers and to Sympathize with her in them Thus Abraham was a Covering to Sarah Gen. 20.16 not only to confine her eye but to defend her person And upon this account he must protect her Soul from temptation her Body from harm her Name from reproach and her Person from contempt either of Children Servants or others For as much as she hath forsaken all her friends and cast her self upon his care and kindness and it would be unpardonable cruelty in him to desert or betray her And then he ought to sympathize with her in her troubles but of this before In short his whole carriage to her should be full of tenderness and composed of Love and Pity 5. The husbands Love is shewed to his wife in Giving her a good Example namely of Piety Gravity Charity Wisdom and Goodness which will be the most constant and effectual Lecture that he can read unto her The (b) 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Arist de cura rei fam l. 1. Philosopher could say That a well-bred wife as soon as she is married accounts the way and course of her husband as a Law prescribed to her by God himself The good or evil Example of a Magistrate Minister or Husband hath a more real though insensible influence upon the actions of their inferiors than all their (c) Homines amplius oculis quam auribus eredunt longumiter est per praecepta breve efficax per exempla Senec. Ep. 6. Laws and Precepts And as for the Husband he is called the guide of her youth Prov. 2.17 If he be holy quiet and industrious she cannot for shame be wicked froward and idle His discourses will direct hers his prayers will teach her to pray his justice temperance and charity will be a law a rule a motive to make her just and sober and charitable If he be an Atheist an Epicure a Pharisee it undoes her He is to go before her and usually she follows him either to Hell or Heaven 4. An husbands Love is to be shewed in his yielding to the reasonable requests of his wife So did David to Bathsheba 1 Kings 1.28 So did Isaac to Rebeka Gen. 28.1 So did Abraham to Sarah Gen. 16.6 though the thing it self was grievous to him So did Jesus Christ daily to his Church He that loves gives and grants and that readily And the Husband should rather prevent his wife and give before she asks than be difficult or hard to be intreated she is to take care that her requests be reasonable and then she needs no Intercessor for her Famous is that instance in Story of Cleopatra who after that her Husband Meleager his Father Mother Neighbours had all in vain solicited his help to defend their City they having disobliged him before At length his Wife runs to him when the enemy was entring and cryes (d) Succurre quaeso mi vir occidimus nisi succurris Plutarch Help good Husband else we are lost And this charm'd and rouz'd him to their rescue One word from her prevail'd more with him than the cryes and arguments of all the rest And to this may be referr'd His taking her counsel in divers cases So did (e) 1 Sam. 1 23. Elkanah so did (f) Gen. 21.12 Abraham For though you may not always perceive Judgment in her Counsel yet you may be
L. Vives value upon them and not to think meanly of every thing in her husband Thus when the wife of Tigranes was asked by her husband after a great solemnity what she thought of Cyrus whom every one did commend as the most excellent person in all that company she answer'd roundly (p) Ita me dii ament ut toto convivio nunquam abs te ad alium vi uâ— deflexerim oculos Truly I look't at no body there but at you my husband And if the husband be but meanly accomplisht yet she ought highly to value the excellency of his Place seeing the Holy Ghost hath in this very respect styl'd him the Image and Glory of God 1 Cor. 11.7 So that whatever he is in himself or to others yet to the wife he is a None-such Such you esteem'd him when you (q) Sed horridus incultus est Semel placuit Nunquid vir frâ—quenter cligendus comparem suam bos elâ—git equus diligit si mutetur alius trahere jugum nescit compar alterius se non totum putat Ambr. tom 4. p. 55. chose him and so you ought still to esteem him And you are to remember the sin and punishment of Michal 2 Sam. 6.16 She despised her husband in her heart and ver 23. she had no child to the day of her death The wife ought to consider that her honour and respect among her family and neighbours doth very much rise and fall according to that which she bears to her husband so that in honouring him she honours her self 2. This Reverence is made up of (r) Timet virum suum adultera verùm non ideò quod illum amet sed quod sibi ipsi conscia est admissi delicti timet verum uxor virum suum fidelis honesta non ex mala conscientia sed ex conjugali dâ—lectione Musc in loc Love Which though it be most prest upon the Husband yet is also the Duty of the Wife Tit. 2.4 Teach the young women to be sober to love their husbands to love their children Thus Sarah Rebecca and Rachel left Parents Friends and Country out of their intire love to their husbands Thus those excellent women being besieg'd together with their husbands in the Castle of Winsberg having liberty for themselves to go out and carry what they could with them took up each their husband and so delivered them But above all comparisons is the Instance that L. Vives gives us of a generous (s) Si deformis est maritus amandus animus cui nupsisti L. Vives who gives a large narration hereof p. 706. de Chr. foem young woman by name Clara Cerventa well known to him that was married to one Valdaura that proved to be full of diseases and lothsom sores whom yet she attended with that care cost and love dressing his sores which no body else would touch selling all her attire and jewels to maintain him and after ten long years of languishment when he was dead and her friends came rather to congratulate than condole her loss she with great trouble told them that she could be willing to purchase her dear Valdaura again with the loss of her five Children It is not fond doting love but such love as this vvhich begets reverence in the heart of the wife to her own husband And indeed there is no better means to increase the husband's love than the (t) 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Chrysost in Col. hom 10. wife's reverence and that alone will make this sweet and easie 3. Fear is the third ingredient into the reverence which the wife owes unto her husband And this I told you was the proper import of this (u) Quo verbo talem intelligit timorem qui ex amore reverentia erga mariâ—um prâ—ficiscitur Zanch. in loc word in my Text. And this is requir'd 1 Pet. 3.2 a chast conversation coupled with fear the one is not sufficient without the other And this the (x) Vxor autem honesta suum virum ita ut aequum est pudicè 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 debet Arist ubi supra Philosopher saw and acknowledged and thereupon distinguisheth between a servile dread and an ingenuous fear exploding the former as unsuitable to the nearness and dearness of that Relation and exacting the latter which is no more than a (y) Subjectiâ— ista consistit in hoc ut mulier tanquam inferior virum tanquam caput revereatur observet caveat ne offâ—ndat sed ejus mandata laeto animo praestet Zanch. in loc cautious diligence to please him and care lest she should offend him A wife must not sit down and say If he be pleased so it is if not let him help himself how he can No but I will do my utmost to give my husband contentment For though I do not fear his hand yet I fear his frown Better I should displease all the world than my own husband She ought rather to deny her self than make her Head her dear Head to ake 2. And now let us trace this Reverence of the wife to her husband in its Pattern laid before her in the Context of these words And here I affirm these two things 1. That the wife ought to Reverence her husband as the Church doth Jesus Christ So ver 22. Wives submit your selves unto your own husbands as unto the Lord and ver 24. Therefore as the Church is subject to Christ so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing Examples are prevalent especially of wise and good people here 's the example of all the wise and godly people in the world to perswade the wife to reverence her husband and the Apostle seems to say that it is as much a duty in the wife to be (z) Truncus est vir planc mortuus cujus caput non est Christus demens temeraria est mulier cui vir non praeâ—st L. Vives de Chr. f. p. 704. subject to the husband as it is in the Church to be subject to Christ In pursuance of this I shall not expatiate but keep near my Text. Two things proclaim the Reverence that the Church bears to Christ 1. The Matter of her Subjection and that is in every thing she doth not yield in great matters and stick at small nor yield in small things and deny in great she doth not yield to him only so far as her Interest or Appetite permits her but when he requires it denies them both So saith the Apostle vers 24. Let the wives be subject to their own husbands in every thing that is in every thing that is not forbidden by an higher power even the Law of God Indeed if a thing be only inconvenient the wife may mildly reason and shew the inexpediency of it but if she cannot convince and satisfie her Husband she must if there be no sin in the case submit her reason and her will to his 2. The
in a constant calling Consider that the greatest flames begin with a spark and therefore tamper not with the pleasant motions of original concupiscence Subject not the soul of a Man to the pleasures of a Brute this is sure that they perish in the using and leave nothing but a sting behind and foolish is that pleasure where that which delights instantly (d) Verum nimium miserandi plangenda conditio est ubi cito praeterit quod delectat permanet sine fine quod cruciat Id. p. 725. vanishes and that which remains perpetually torments If you have been overtaken with these faults O cleanse your hearts and hands by the merits of Christ's blood in the use of Fasting and Prayer that God may not visit upon you your Old sins by giving you up to New ones or by bringing some signal curse upon you in husband wife or children And get a blessed taste of those more sirm safe and ravishing delights which are to be found in the favour and promises of God in the pardon of sin and assured hopes of life and immortality These will sufficiently disgrace those gross and base absurdities and make you to take no delight in the muddy stream that have drunk of the Spring 2. Be 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 e 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 festina eme ag u n expecta ducturus uxorem Buxtorf ex Jevam. considerate in your choice You see how severe the Rules of that Condition are when you are once engaged in it And therefore when you find that you are called to it be sure to recommend it earnestly to God by (f) 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Câ—rys de uxore duo Prayer as Abraham's servant did Gen. 24.12 In this way be sure to acknowledg him and he shall direct thy paths No business so critical none so weighty and therefore no business so calls for (g) 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Id. in Col. solemn and earnest Prayer And let Reason and (h) For Fitness in special as well as Goodness in general must be one main ground of our choice Gatak Serm. p. 176. Judgment have some stroke in your choice Do not first love and then consider but first consider and then love Chiefly fix your observation on the Soul of the party many marry to lay lands to lands or money to money but see you that his or her (i) In the life of the lady Falkland Soul lie well for yours For no (k) Florem decoris singuli carpunt dies Senec. Beauty Friends or (l) Quicunque ducit uxorem propter divitias ei erunt liberi non probi Buxt ex Prov. in Kiddusch Portion will settle upon you a comfortable life if pride passion or any other lust predominate in the Soul And why will ye espouse a perpetual cross for some present profit or delight It concerns therefore the man and especially the woman to endeavour to marry a member of Christ a religious person where they may most rationally expect the conscionable discharge of their respective duties If such be not the best husbands and wives it is not by reason of their piety but their defect of it Add to this a Discovery of the (m) If thou wert to take an house thou wouldst enquire what commodities or inconveniences what neighbours c. and yet that thou maist sell upon a dislike how much more c. Chrysost tom 8. de uxore ducenda natural tempers of those you mean to marry If they be proud and imperious to others ten to one they will be so to you if they be cholerick sour or sullen you will hardly find an Heaven upon Earth And you ought to deal plainly with one another both concerning your natural Defects concerning your moral Dispositions and concerning your civil Condition that you may not give and that Satan may not take an advantage whereby to cause disquiet or repinings afterwards You count it a cheat to have an unfound ill-condition'd decrepid beast put upon you for a sound young and towardly one certainly it is the greatest injury in the world to defraud one whom you pretend to love and to wrong them in that wherein you can never make them reparation 3. Study the Duties of Marriage before you enter into it Leap not into this solemn condition at adventures There are crosses to be born there are snares to be avoided there are Duties to be done and do you make no provision Hence slow the frequent miscarriages in that honourable estate Hence that Repentance that is both too soon and too late The Husband knows not how to Rule and the Wife knows not how to obey Both ignorant both conceited and both miserable And therefore Parents ought to teach their children the Duties of Wedlock before they enter into the State of Wedlock neither can they be ever acquitted before God that hurry young people ready or unready willing or (n) Hostis uxor est ubi invita ad virum venit Plaut unwilling yea sometimes very (o) Hoc etiam sciendum est quod pueri ante 13 annos puellae ante 12. annos secundum leges matrimonium inire nequeunt Quod si ante predicta tempora copulam inierint separari possunt quam vis assensu parentum juncti fuerunt Lombard lib. 4. dest 36. children for secular advantages into this Relation A course that hath been signaliz'd by infinite disastrous consequenees And most people step into that estate merely to obtain pleasure and gain but as ignorant of their Duty as the Beasts that perish and so families that should be the Nurseries of the Church and Commonwealth prove to be the very Seed-plots of disorder and debauchery Indeavour therefore to read over besides the Scripture which is the Book of all Books Dr. Gouge his Treatise of Domestical Duties or Mr. Bolton or Mr. Gataker or Mr. Whately on the same Subject And the learned will lose no labour in reading Ludovicus Vives de officio Mariti de Christiana foemina fron each of whose Garden I have made up this small Posie and wherein you will find especially in the first and last a more full and clear stating and proving these things then can be expected from so simple a man in so small a time 4. Resign up your selves both of you unfeignedly unto God and to his will until you be savingly regenerated and sanctified you cannot (p) If he be pleased he will turn thy water into wine if he be displeased he will turn thy wine into vinegar Gataker Serm. p. 141. please God nor be intire blessings to one another You may indeed live together like civil Pagans but what 's this to the life of Christians Religion will most firmly bind you to God Religion will most firmly bind you to one another A good temper may do much but a new nature superadded to it will do more The Husband that truly I say that truly fears God dares not be bitter to
his wife the wife that truly fears God dares not be cross with her husband A Bible plac'd between you will take up many a difference comfort you under many a cross and pang guide you in many a strait wherein flesh and blood will be confounded and at a loss And then in those critical cases wherein Duty and Passion strive for mastery resolve with your selves that it is much better for either of you to obey God's will than to have your own That as there is the highest Reason in his Commands so there is the greatest Sweetness in obeying them Set oft before you that golden Rule Matth. 7.12 and calmly consider whether you behave your self to your yoke-fellow as you your self would be dealt with if you were in their condition And though you be never so just and good other wayes yet believe that Jam. 2.10 he or she that keeps the whole law and yet offends knowingly and commonly in one point is guilty of all Your Righteousness abroad will not excuse your crossness at home nor her zeal in prayer make any amends for her heat in passion But when you are both resolved to study your own duties and sincerely to do them how hard soever you will live together as heirs of the grace of life and as heirs of the life of glory 5. Settle your affections well at the beginning It was a wise and true Observation (q) Plutacch praeâ— conjug that vessels which are compacted of divers parts or glued together of divers pieces at first will easily with every bruise or fall be broke in pieces but when they are strengthened by tract of time it will be very hard yea scarce possible to separate them So it is in marriage at first the union is raw and green an unkindness then a cross word or look will quickly alienate but when time and experience have consolidated this new sprung affection then it will be much harder to dissolve it And being once assured of a conjugal love in each other give no way to cursed Jealousie which very often hath no other ground than the Weakness or Wickedness of them that are sick of it and to be sure when once it is admitted all the joy and comfort of this life is gone it is a bitter-sweet Poyson and miserable are they that either give or take occasion for it Stop your ears therefore and knit your brow upon tale-bearers and whisperers that under pretence of great love and secrecy tell you just Nothing and remember that Love thinketh no evil but puts the best interpretation possible upon the doubful words looks and carriage of a stranger much more of so near a (r) Liberiores sunt viri quam foeminae vitae totius rationis Viris curanda esse mutla foeminis solam pudicitiam Claudendae aures iis qui sinistrum quid de marito volunt deferre Lu. Vives de Chr. foem p. 720. Relation And this I mention here because most commonly Jealousie takes place there where true Affection was never fixed and rooted in the beginning 6. Lastly to speak all in one Pray for Wisdom Humility and Vprightness 1. Wisdom for vve owe many of our Domestick distempers to our weakness and indiscretion not wisely preventing or removing things that cause offence How easily would a wise man avoid distasting words or looks or actions How easily might he keep his Authority and never forfeit it and she submit and never dispute it wisdom would pick and chuse the fittest opportunities to instruct advise reprove and comfort and vvould direct to the best manner and method vvherein to do it Wisdom vvill consider that either party might have found the same or greater crosses in another condition as in this or in another person as in this and therefore things are vvell in that they are not worse and however that marriage which is God's Ordinance must not be charged with their disquiets but themselves And 2. Humility that is a singular help for them both in the discharging of their Duties This will keep the Husband from the intemperate use of his power and the vvife in a ready subjection to her Husband For only by pride cometh contention but with the well-advised is wisdom Prov. 13.10 A proud Spirit could not agree vvith an Angel but the humble will agree with any body This also will greatly help them to contentment in their Condition For says Humility my Husband my Wife is a great deal too good for such a sinful creature as I am my condition is too good for me these straits and troubles are great but I deserve greater this was a sharp reproof but alas I deserve hell and what 's a harsh word to hell That man or woman vvill sit down quietly with great tryals that know they are not worthy the least of mercies And besides Humility will suggest such a carriage and behaviour in word and deed as will infallibly oblige each other and force respect from them And lastly Vprightness is necessary to the doing of these Duties well For there is written a conclusive law in an upright heart to do the whole will of God whether it appear to be with them or against them it will teach them rather to obey than to dispute and in obedience to do each more than their part rather than less In doubtful cases the upright heart will choose the safest course though it prove the hardest and resolves to suffer the greatest injury rather than offer the least An upright heart watches against sinful self which is the great root of injuries and mischiefs in every relation and prompts us to keep on in the way of our duty notwithstanding all discouragments In a word the upright Husband and Wife do chiefly study each their (s) 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Chrys in Col. Hom. 10. own Duty in their Relations and are most severe against their own particular failings What are the Duties of Parents and Children and how are they to be managed according to Scripture Serm. XVII Colos III. 20 21. Children obey your Parents in all things for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers provoke not your Children to anger lest they be discouraged MY business is not to discuss the Entity of Relations in their foundation and terms which the Philosopher is conversant about but to discourse the Efficacy of the chiefest in Christian practice Relationes etsi minimae eâ—titatis sunt maximae efficaciae i. e. to enquire into the nature and management of those reciprocal offices betwixt Parents and Children which if well discharg'd according to the sense of the Divine Oracles do contribute most to the happiness of humane Society and give reputation to the Communion of Saints The Subject I know is common and the Scriptures copious upon it which some who it may be are not the most accurate in their own relative station think a very easie task to treat on but to do it distinctly and fully within the time allotted to
to cajol their Votaries into their unscriptural Orders as the Pharisees did Corban (u) Mark 7.1 113. saying it is a gift devoted to God which hypocritical allegation our Saviour disprov'd because they vacated the Commandments of God for their own traditions can be no warrant to invade the rights of Parents for Religion towards God doth not interfere with the necessary duties of our Relation And to do that under a notion of Religion not enjoyned by God against that too which he hath required is impious and to offer that to him which is another's he likes not He is for equity and not for division or confusion Charlemaign made a decree against this dishonour to Parents under the vail and disguise of Religion 2. In the great business of Marriage 't is very requisite to observe their counsel and advice Parents certainly should sway much in this weighty matter as they did in Isaac's matching with Rebekah (w) Gen. 24.6 7 63 67. and Jacob's with Laban's daughter (x) 28.1 2 3. with 29 11 18 19. Ruth though a daughter in law was willing to be disposed of by Naomi in the change of her condition observing her orders in that affair (y) Ruth 2.21 and 3.1 c. yea even Ishmael would take his Mother's advice for a wife (a) Gen. 21 21. and Sampson mov'd for his Parents consent (b) Judg. 14 2. Thamar's words in striving with her lustful brother imply the gaining of her Father's consent requisite (c) 2 Sam. 13.13 and Sechem's words to his Father vvhen he had wickedly defloured Dinah whom he met with in her idling visit do import he was convinc'd it was equitable to have her Father's consent to marry her (d) Gen. 34.3 c For Children ought in reason to think their Parents wiser and better able for the most part to provide for them than they themselves are because likely as they have more experimental knowledg so if Parents be not canker'd with the love of this world their affections are more governable and not so easily biass'd from moving in the fairest way as Childrens often are in their youthful and spritely age when their inward emotions are apt to be more turbulent unless sanctified with grace and moderated vvith vertue And further here it may be consider'd that Parents who brought forth and bred up their Children should by no means be bereft of them vvithout their consent sith they are so much their goods and possessions that it were a kind of purloining to give themselves away without their Parents leave The maid under the law that had made a vow out of her Father's cognizance could not perform it without his consent (e) Numb 30.4 5. Terent. In the Comoedian it was accounted a disparagement to take a vvise against the will of her Father So that complyance with Parents advice here is a business of great effect As one saith ingenuously Mr. Fuller The Child in this case bowls best at the mark of his own contentment who besides the aim of his own eye is directed by his Father who is to give the ground To which may correspond a passage of Cyrus who when a match was propos'd to him said I like the Lady her Dowry and her Family but I must have these agree with my Parents and then I will marry her He belike thought it injurious in finally bestowing himself to neglect his Parents and disregard their counsel in the main business of his life But if Children except and say Exception Answer What if after our real desires to take their counsel they urge us to marry such as we cannot affect I confess your circumstances may be such in this instance as may render the case very intricate and 't would require a discourse by it self to give satisfaction to it All I shall say now is 1. Be sure your non-affection or aversion to the Person propos'd be not without reason remember you are unperienc'd suspect your own judgment and take heed lest some impotent passion or amorous inclination to another person discompose you from attaining to a right opinion of things perswade your selves that as your Parents have experience likely their affections lead them to be careful for your welfare Be therefore earnest in Prayer with God who turns the heart at his pleasure (f) Prov. 21.1 that he would incline your affection to the party propos'd all the while there is no disallowance from above Non amo te Sabide non passum dicere quare c. and you can see no just cause to the contrary having only the mere plea that you cannot love and be importunate with him to rectifie such untowardness of mind lest you at least seem wilful as leads you vvithout good reason to reject an offer of his Providence to you for the promoting of your temporal vvelfare in an hopeful prospect of the Divine blessing But if after this humble and unfeigned address to God you still find your heart altogether averse you may in a reverent way entreat your Parents not to press that match and think of some other wherein you may be better satisfied For my part I do not conceive you are oblig'd to marry those you cannot really affect unless I could see how you might with a good conscience in the presence of God enter into a solemn Covenant of Love (g) Mal. 2.14 with a patty you cannot but upon deliberation at the same instant dislike My reason is not only because it would be an utter frustration of the end of marriage which should be mutual satisfaction but also the beginning of that estate in a kind of perjury or at least with a doubting conscience (h) Rom. 14.13 23. Sith as Qâ—intilian * Declam 376. observ'd Affectus nostri nobis non serviunt we cannot still keep our affections in a subserviency to our own be sure not to another's reason My wise is to dwell with me for ever the half of my lasting joy or my lasting sorrow and if I do not love her we cannot live comfortably together c. 2. If Parents should counsel you to joyn your self to an ungodly person and enforce you to fix there the best Casuijis of our own †Bishop Hall Sanderson Taylouâ— Mr. Baxter will easily resolve you that in such a case you have a negative voice and may humbly refuse to comply with such a motion for though you have not a judgment of positive decision to determine whom you would have yet you have a judgment of discretion and you may with all reverence to your Parents proposing refuse an unworthy person who is like to make your life either sinful or miserable This may be further cleared in considering the extent of Childrens obedience There is another particular yet which concerns Children in this duty of observance and that is 4. To follow their good examples we should take notice of those fair copies they have set us
token of ill behaviour under Government and do disguise Children of the most comly structure in the world Thus of the first general in Childrens duties The second is concerning the Latitude and extent of Childrens obedience in all things 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 in my Text. We cannot imagine this is so universal and absolute as Obedience to God or that the obligation lies in any thing beside the mind of the supreme Governour of Heaven and Earth or dissonant to the holy will of our Lord for only that obedience is required which is well-pleasing and grateful unto him So that the Power demanding it must have a warrant from him unless we should embrace the horrid opinion of the daring Atheist in his Leviathan †c. 42 p. 234. who impiously affirms that if a Christian be commanded by his lawful Prince or Soveraign whose authority was first paternal to say he doth not believe in Christ it is lawful to obey which atheistical tenet doth either post-pone the command of God to the command of man which is most abominable or without further enquiry doth account it a divine precept which would prefer an hellish error to the Heavenly verity overturn the whole Christian institution and set up diabolical adoration ‖ Dr Templar Idea Theol. Levia p. 96 97 251. 101 102. 'T would introduce an infallible spirit in all Civil as the Papists pretend to have in their Ecclesiastical Government yea quite exterminate all regards of Conscience and raze out the common notions of good and evil whereas all subjection which is not of faith i. e. agrees not with the judgment of Conscience propounding it's dictates under the reason of the Divine will is sin (x) Rom. 13.1 4.5 with 14.23 God is only arbitrary and absolute Lawgiver (y) Jam 4.12 And as Constant the Father of Constantine the Emperour affirm'd they could not be faithful Subjects unto him who easily contemn'd God and their Conscience neither Children be truly obedient to their Parents who do so Our obedience then ought to be only in all things acceptable to our supreme Lord and Master And therefore the Apostle hath elsewhere express'd the command to obey in the Lord (z) Eph. 6.1 5 6. which is the same as unto the Lord and unto Christ fearing God (a) Colos 3.22 23. in opposition to the pleasing of men This doth moderate the commands of Parents and regulate the obedience of Children Wives and Servants 'T is true had Parents kept their original rectitude their commands would never have been other than consonant to the Divine pleasure and Law of Nature but the fall that disordered that harmonious and happy constitution and now their precepts do often thwart or jar with the will of him who is Soveraign Lord whom to please is the determination or limit as well as motive to Childrens obedience This agrees with the sense of Arch-bishop Anselm †Comment in Colos in his tantummodo quae praâ—eptum Domini non excedunt c. 580 years ago expounding my Text. How it will rellish now with those of his order in an Hypothesis of theirs I determine not But he saith that Natural and Ecclesiastical Carnal and Spiritual Parents are to be obeyed in all things only in the Lord i. e. saith he in those things only which are not beside or Do not exceed the precept of the Lord because it is pleasing unto God that in such a manner we should obey them It should seem he held then according to truth that if a Superiour should exceed his commission by imposing any preter-evangelical Canon for Doctrine or practice the Inferiors non-conformity thereunto was no transgression For in obeying the commands of a subordinate power (b) Acts 4.19 5.29 Exod. 1.17 we are primarily to take care that the rights of the absolute Soveraign remain inviolable seeing God gave the Parent that Authority he hath in requiring that which is displeasing to God he hath none And as the Child is to obey him so he is to obey God without whose warrant his child is not oblig'd to active obedience but passive or submission by suffering the penalty with cheerfulness that is pleasing to God in such a case For the truth is It is thank-worthy if one for Conscience towards God endure grief suffering wrongfully (c) 1 Pet. 2.19 20. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 this is acceptable with God whatever acceptance it find among men there is a grace in this behaviour before God Now the great thing Children are to look at in their obedience to Parents is that it be well-pleasing to God so saith my Text and if they obey without his warrant who can secure them they shall do what is acceptable with him God is to have an affection predominant to that we have for our Parents (d) Mat. 10.37 Luke 14.26.9.59 60 61. We must not dishonour him in pretension to honour them In things impious or dishonest Parents have no authority herein disobedience would be just and obsequiousness criminal Hence we find Acrotatus commended amongst the Antients because when his Parents had required of him to do an unjust thing he answered I know you are willing I should do that which is just for so you taught me to do I will therefore do that which you desire I should but what you bid me I will not do A denial in this case is to be express'd in all humble language Hierocles though no Christian hath notable things about the extent of Childrens obedience for he arguing in this case 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 c. ‖ Comment in Câ—rm Pytbag p. 53 c. If in all things we must obey our Parents how shall we go astray from piety and other vertues if through the pravity of their manners they lead us into those things which are not altogether honest and commendable If sometime their will be not consonant to the Divine Laws He gives this answer amongst others * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 c. If indeed the Divine Law draw you to one thing and your Parents to another in this disagreement of wills it is more excellent to choose those things which are better and in those only to be inobservant of the commands of Parents wherein even they themselves obey not the Divine Laws for it cannot be that he who is resolv'd to observe the rules of vertue can consent to them by whom they are neglected but in all other things we ought as much as we can to honour our Parents viz. in bodily observance and a most ready free supply of things necessary sith they have right to use those they have brought forth and nourished c. Neither will the Parents unkindness be enough to discharge the Child from obedience which is to be yielded in all the circumstances of their lives And that considering 3. The great reason to engage in the duties of Childrens obedience in the Lord is undoubtedly the most cogent Motive
is yet but an Embrio there is not only requisite Prayer which was presupposed with thanksgiving for the sanctifying the fruit of the body (a) 1 Tim. 4.4 5. as Jeremiah and John were (b) Jer. 1.5 Luke 1.15 but also a tender care for the preservation of life Both Parents are concern'd in order to a better observance of the fifth Commandment to have regard to what is imply'd and required in the sixth and seventh Commandment When God hath curiously made the babe in secret in the lower parts of the earth (c) Ps 139.13 15. it is to be regarded even before it see the light Manaoh's wife had a positive order in this case for the safety of her self and child vvhen it was conceiv'd and her good husband was desirous as appears by his enquiry to be assistant to her therein (d) Judg. 13 4 11 12. The Rule given her by the Angel of the Lord r spected temperance forbearance of wine vvas order'd both for her own and the child 's good Upon such an account the Philosopher * Arist. Folitic l. 7. de Rep. l. 8. c. 17. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 determined in his Politick that pregnant women should be careful as to their aliment and elsewhere particularly commends milk and not wine as more fit nourishment for many bodies wherein he conceits the latter may occasion diseases As for nourishment the Mother should be prudently careful and the Father in special case of a real longing appetite should endeavour seasonable supplies so there should be a joynt care for a provision of things necessary and convenient to entertain the Babe into the world when brought forth Though the Virgin Mary was in a low estate and necessitated to travel at the Emperor's command yet she was not unprovided of swadling clothes (e) Luke 2.7 All this gives check to those Mothers who without a call frisk and jantle about any how at their pleasure and are intemperate yea against the Apostle's charge and to the disparagement of their Christian Profession (f) Tit. 2.4.5 for he would have the Matrons by good example to teach the young women to be sober to love their husbands and their children to be discreet chast keepers at home good c. And this is more especially requisite for Child-bearing women sith the Romans observ'd that Coriolanus's Neece miscarried by being too strait lac'd the Sister of Curius by much dancing and the Sister of C. Duilius by immoderate eating of various dainties 'T is indeed granted that carelessness of making provision of necessaries for clothing their new-born Infants is the fault of a few in our Age wherein under the notion of clouts or clothtrenchers things of the greatest value by some of mean quality are found out to such an height of curiosity sometimes as appears not very consonant to the simplicity and humility of the Gospel 'T were I confess Ostrich-like to suffer these sure pledges of nature to be without conveniences or to expose them like some of the ancient Greeks as they are sometimes in this great City at the doors in the street but to make them Peacock-like to surpass in finery above their rank can be no symptome of humility and then too when the Parents would have it thought they engage them to forsake all the pomps and vanities of the vvorld But this may respect the next duty viz. 2. To give the Child nourishment when it appears in the world for the preservation of it's natural life and to seek that it may be spiritually alive Parents should use the best means nature and grace do prompt to them For the former that breast-milk is ordinarily the most proper aliment Nature teacheth as also for the most part that the Mother's is most agreeable likewise that she is oblig'd to nurse her own Babe whatever softnesses many delicate Dames do now cherish the Scriptures as well as Principles of Reason do evince unless she be excus'd in some few instances as in case of necessity or greater charity namely when the impediment to her giving suck is natural disability a really great weakness or an affliction with a disease which might be transmitted with the milk or in case of the publick concerns of a Kingdom for securing of succession in the Royal Throne or c. For natural instinct which is seen in these springing fontinels the breasts (h) Cantic 4.5 unto this end for giving that food better digested unto the child vvhen come out vvith vvhich it vvas fed in the vvomb hath reason super-added in man As marriage to him especially under the Christian constitution becomes an ordinance of God vvhich in the mixture of other creatures is merely natural * Dr. Jer. Taylor 's Great Exempl p. 1. Sect. 3. Now to pervert the end and designation of Nature with the necessities thereof is in effect to violate those reasonable inducements which do oblige conscience in that vvhich is comly and not to correspond with the design of justice charity and sohriety A matter certainly very inaccountable for those who are bound seriously to think on so as to do whatsoever things are true whatsoever things are honest whatsoever things are just whatsoever things are pure whatsoever things are lovely whatsoever things are of good report or if there be any other vertue (i) Phil. 4.8 Certainly the thing can be no disparagement to them of the best quality but a credit only because it agrees not with the modern mode of the Italian and French amongst whom the great ones often suckle their Children upon vile women and sometimes upon Strumpets whose manners are drawn in with their milk Chrysostom * Homil. in Psal thought it a reproach that any women should blush to be Nurses who were become Mothers The Spartan law was that the Noblest even the Kings wives should nurse the first child Historians †Herodotus c. shew Queens have done it The Noblest amongst the ancient Romans and Germans did it And one of the Caesars thought it a prodigie in those days that a Roman Lady refused to suckle her own Infant and yet gave suck to a Puppy that her milk might be more artificially dried up But I fear the wantonness and pride of some Mothers and the ill-nature of some Fathers who love their ease and quiet may render this discourse unpleasing to them yet had I time to enlarge for that reason it would be the more necessary in the cases not excepted However the blessed Virgin giving Jesus milk from the bottles of his own filling may commend it with reputation enough to any Christian Mother who seriously desires to practise the choice lesson of Self-denial For the Scriptures consonant to the common prinicples of right reason do either take this Duty for granted where no just exceptions of Mothers nursing their own Children for a ruled case as in the Father of the faithful's wife Sarah (k) Gen. 21.7 who was a very honourable
woman and others (l) Psal 22.9 Cant. 8.1 Luke 11.27 or else they give us examples of Mothers who were commendable patterns as were Hannah (m) 1 Sam. 1.22 the Virgin Mary (n) Luke 1.28 with 11 27. David's Mother (o) Psal 22.9 and that affectionate one who stood before Solomon to plead for her child (p) 1 Kings 3.21 or afford us such Texts as by consequence do infer it as in Jacob's blessing (q) Gen 49.25 and a contrary curse on others (r) Hos 9.14 the charge to Manoah's wife to avoid things hurtful to her milk (s) Judg. 13.4 considering her constitution and the climate she liv'd in the Apostle gives it as the character of good women that they have nurs'd up Children (t) 1 Tim. 5 10. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 as Moses his Mother did him awaiting Providence to perform this natural office to her own child and was not as the weeping Prophet laments some in his time worse than Sea-monsters like Ostriches of the wilderness (u) Lam. 4.3 I do not remember in holy Writ that any Mother put forth her own child to suck and though there be mention made of Rebekah's nurse (w) Gen. 24.59 35.8 and others (x) 2 Sam 4 4. 2 Kings 11.2 yet in all probability they were common dry-nurses or nurse-keeping women such as had skill to be about Child-bearing women fit to advise and attend them Be sure Rebekah had no child till about twenty years after she was married and if she or any had milch-nurses it may be their own Mothers might die in Child-bed or not be able to perform their office But Naomi when old and past Child-bearing became a dry-nurse unto Ruth's child being assistant to her daughter at her lying-in (y) Ruth 4 16. with 1.12 When though there be some pain in suckling however less I suppose in following the natural way of laying the child to yet there is also a pleasure and benefit which may well sweeten and usually compensate in ordinary cases The careful Father should contribute his endeavours to promote all this and accommodate his wife in the nursery with all convenient requisites to preserve the temporal life of the child But then there is also a care with reference to the spiritual life of the child to attend this which Christian Parents are oblig'd to by dedicating of their Infant seed unto the Lord according to his appointment for the solemn enrolling of his Disciples (z) Mat. 28.19 Acts 21.5 6. 16.33 10 47 which matriculation of a child should not be unseasonably delay'd but perform'd in a due Christian manner sith obedience in the Lord (a) Eph. 6 1. will be required of it as soon as it is able to do any thing which implies that as Hannah dedicated her Samuel to the Lord in covenant under the Old Testament dispensation (b) 1 Sam. 1.28 so it is to be devoted to the Lord and consecrated to his use as he hath instituted under the New Testament dispensation and that is a solemn enrollment by Baptism amongst Christians who by this Rite are signally declared to be in covenant with him his Disciples and Members of his spiritual houshold (c) Gal. 3.27 Rom. 6.3 4. 1 Cor. 12.13 Jo. 4.1 2. Deut. 29.10 11. Acts 16.33 who in that relation are to yield obedience unto their Parents in him and as unto him How else can we so easily imagine that Christian Children should be oblig'd to obey their Parents in the Lord but as they are by their Parents who have most right to them devoted to his service I confess I cannot understand Now it is highly reasonable that they who have been instruments to bring a stain upon their Children (d) Rom. 5.12 16 17. Eph. 2.1 2. should also be as instrumental as they can even as Believers under the Old Testament were to bring them unto God in the use of the means he hath now prescribed to get them washed with the blood of sprinkling by giving them unto God in the Covenant as they then did (e) Gen. 17.10 11 13. Rom. 11.17 20. Mat. 18.13 4. 19.13.14 Luke 18.15 Tit. 3.5 Favores sunt ampliandi For undoubtedly under this gracious dispensation there is no abridgment of any priviledg to the Infant-seed of Believers which they before enjoy'd so that they should not now be brought to the Lord that he may own and bless them and the promises be pleaded on their behalf whose Parents are heirs (f) Gal. 3.14 27 29. 1 Cor. 7.14 for as much as the Father 's right to the promises gives the Children some kind of right to the same inheritance (g) Acts 2.38 39. Mat. 28.19 â— Câ—r 1.16 〈◊〉 2.12 13. 〈◊〉 17.10 11 Jer. 32.39 Isa 44.3 yea the promise and precept do answer each other as a deed and its counterpart There was no need of particularizing every subject to be baptized any other than those vvho vvere discipled it being so vvell known who had the Covenant-seal by the common practice of the Jews under the former dispensation of the Covenant And now the Lord Jesus Christ in commissioning his Ministers to disciple and baptize all Nations then all in them discipled chiefly designed to instruct them in what manner and form they should baptize those that belong to his Kingdom viz. into the Name of the Father Son and Holy Ghost which had not been before used but now upon the discharging of Circumcision was every where to be observ'd Thus Christian Parents are at first to contribute their endeavours toward their Childrens spiritual life And for this temporal life further they are also to provide food (h) Gen. 42 2. Exod. 13.3 Mat. 7.9 10 11. and rayment (i) Gen 37.3.21.15 and to allow fit and honest recreation for their Children (k) Zach. 8 5. to keep them in health and physick when they are sick (l) 1 Kings 14.2 2 Kings 4.22 Jo. 4.47 Mat. 17.15 equity and necessity oblige to it with a solicitous care to preserve their lives from dangers as much as may be in their power (m) Exod. 2.2 3. and to see according to their quality and calling that they be accommodated with conveniencies for body and mind (n) Gen. 21.15 Deut. 1.31 Hence another particular of Parental care is 3. Education of their Children which is a very comprehensive Duty begins early and lasts till their Children be emancipated Our Apostle in another Epistle (o) Eph. 6.4 reduceth this to two heads 1. Nurture and 2. Admonition of the Lord. Some conceive the former doth more respect manners or civility the later Doctrine or piety though 't is not necessary to take them so restrictively 1. Christian Parents are charg'd to educate or bring up their Childrin in nurture 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Ateneris assuesceâ—e multum i. e. such a kind of domestick learning as befitteth a child according to that of the Wise
man (p) Prov. 22.6 Train up a child in the way he should go Sow the seed and then expect the fruit the first impressions are like to abide though at the very first not understood The Rule it seems is Teach a child neither can any one learn that perfectly which he begins late to learn said the Oratour * Nec perfâ—ctè illud quisquim discet quod serè discere incepit Parents should timely inure their Children to good behaviour before they degenerate more they should consult their temper observe their ingenuity and humour to find out their inclinations and fit them for the service of their generation in such a particular Calling as may be found most suitable to them And this nurturing of them is to be effected by giving them 1. Teaching examples 2. Rules of morality and 3. Moderate Chastisements 1. Teaching examples by which those who converse much with little ones may perceive they are capable of receiving good or harm before they are able to understand other instructions Christian Parents should be wary then as to their own deportment Plus docent exempla quam praecepta before their little ones that it may not be as a spotted but a clear glass When they dayly observe their Parents to perform actions decently and with a grace (q) Rom. 13.13 1 Thes 4.12 Phil 4 8. it hath a great force to form their manners Seeing their Parents in all Family duties to express reverence by their countenance gesture and pronunciation every one taking their place according to their quality and degree this doth early instill a silent deportment and a kind of devotion into these little ones before they can reach the reason of it So that really Christian Parents are concern'd for this purpose to stand in awe †Maxima reverentia debetur pucris as much of their little Children as of any in the world lest because of that love these bear to those from whom they do descend judging what they do to be right they should come to have their judgment perverted by their ill precedents Hence it was that the ancient Romans did with the greatest diligence possibly take care to manage all their affairs in the presence of their Children with all modesty and discretion And it became a proverbial saying that the Temperance of the Parent was the greatest precept to the Children And indeed after when they come to further use of Reason I must pack up things together good or bad examples of parents have a very powerful influence upon Children as well as others to breed them to a good or bad behaviour The young Cock crows as he hears the old one In blessing or cursing playing and blaspheming vve may perceive Children even before they can speak perfectly or go strongly forward enough to learn somewhat agreeable to what they hear and see As Titus then was in all things to shew himself a pattern of good works (r) Tit. 2.7 so should Parents in their Families (s) 2 Tim. 1 5. 1 Tim 3 4. We find in Scripture that a decorum in actions hath greatly affected lookers on (t) 1 Kings 10.5 Job 32.4 6. Gen 43 33. 23.7 which evinceth that in the eye of their Children Parents ought to be very cautelous not only in refraining sinful words and actions but also such things as are indifferent in their own nature yet prove stumbling blocks being in some circumstances in a tendency to sin or such as have at least an appearance of evil in them to their Childrens weaker apprehensions in such a conjuncture So likewise they should forbear the repetition of their own youthful failings with any kind of delight and take special heed they do not so much as seem to make a mock of sin (u) Prov. 14.9 in table-talk and company yea and they should beware of making promises to others or to their Children which they never intend to perform or at least neglect to make good in due circumstances for let me tell you though it be but in light and trivial matters wherein yet a child may have as strong affections as a plodding man to gain a great estate it will interpretatively be a teaching them to lye or be unfaithful which natural pravity will easily promote Not only speeches but gestures fashions and all kind of habits are soon learned by example because man is of all creatures the most mimical or apt to imitate especially what affects him in those he esteems this being a kind of adjunct to Reason we know the little Children had learned to mock the Prophet to their cost Go up thou Bald-pate Go up thou Bald-pate (w) 2 Kings 2.23 24 Dignoscitur socio qui non noscitur è se As many men are known by their Associates they much converse with and delight in who yet carry it so smoothly they are not otherwise discovered and so are the ill-manners of some Parents by some of their Children Wherefore all should observe a good decorum lest they should give occasion to any of their Children to say as that evil one who told his Father ‖ Si malè feci à te didici If I have done ill I learn'd it of you It much behoves Parents to do all things so that they may not make themselves cheap and despicable (x) Tit. 2.15 and cannot but be advantageous to a child's education to have his Parents keep a good port in all things which put Pliny †into that pathetick exclamation in one of his Epistles O te beatum Adolescentum qui cum potissimum imitandum habes cui natura te simillimum esse voluit Lib 8. Epist 13. Bod. in Eph. O! you are an happy young man who have him above all to imitate to whom nature would have you be most like 2. Rules of morality or necessary documents of civility which teach due respect to every one These are requisite to the formation and culture of manners that Children may learn how to behave themselves to Domesticks to those that are elder and younger to Ministers of the Gospel to School-masters to Equals Acquaintance Friends Strangers in all places on all occasions at home abroad in the School in the Church business recreations company solitude in secret publique in mourning joy under benefits injuries in praise dispraise flatteries reproaches jests serious matters various and uncertain changes of affairs wherein special Rules cannot be prescribed to reach every case but general precepts which may engage evermore to things lawful and honest and instruct them with their distance and relation For all which Humility is most to be commended to Children as the great ornament of those in a state of subjection (y) 1 Pet. 3.1 4 5 6. though they be unacquainted with special modes and puntilios Hence it is good to teach that Rule of our Saviour's when he observ'd persons without any consideration of their own rank to choose out the chief places at
monuments (u) Jos 4.6 7 21. whereby Children might take occasion to ask the meaning of them and so Parents might acquaint them with the Ordinances of God (w) Deut. 6.20 21. No doubt but religious Parents have been careful to observe this for the transmitting of pure Religion Adam had taught his Sons to sacrifice as well as train'd them up to business though one of them did not worship God in an acceptable manner (x) Gen. 4.3 4.5 26. Heb. 11.4 He had acquainted them it seems with the fundamental promise concerning remission of sin which the Apostle saith could not be without shedding of blood (y) Heb. 9.22 represented in the instituted Sacrifice which Cain wanted faith to offer acceptably as Abel did giving credit to the divine institution and behaving himself sincerely in this solemn worship as he was instructed Noah also taught his Children though one of them did not observe the instructions (z) Gen. 9 8 22. But we have Abraham the Father of the faithful expresly commended with a special approbation of God for effectually instructing i. e. training or catechizing his children and servants after his example to keep the way of the Lord (a) 18.19 with 14.14 And therefore they are called his initiated ones or 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 whom the Rabbins say †Alting Hist Acad Hebâ— p. 18 19. he did no less instruct in the divine precepts and their observation than train up to war Other memorable instances we have of David (b) Prov. 4 3 4. with Psal 7â— Titl who seems kindly to call Children apart to teach them the fear of the Lord (c) 34.11 which Obadiah learn'd from his youth (d) 1 Kings 18.12 So of his Wife Bathsheba (e) Prov. 31.1 2 c. and those good Women in the New Testament Lois and Eunice (f) 2 Tim. 1 5. And other persons there were who did catechize in all good things (g) Gal 6 6. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 i. e. the rudiments of the Gospel wherein the most excellent Theophilus was catechized or instructed (h) Luke 1.4 as the Jewish children had been catechized in the Law (i) Rom. 2.18 But this part of Education viz. Catechziing being handled at this Exercise in another distinct Query by one well vers'd in the practick part of this necessary Duty may fairly give me who have so much on mine hands a Supersedeas from enlarging now upon it Only let it be remembred that sith Man is born like a wild Asse's colt (k) Job 11 12. and the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom (l) Prov 1.7 with Psal 111.10 Parents are concern'd to be industrious and not be discourag'd from teaching their offspring the words and terms of goodness in confidence they will afterwards comprehend the sense and practically hold fast the form of sound words (m) 2 Tim. 1.13 the little Bibles as Luther us'd to call orthodox Catechisms gather'd up from the holy Scripture which it seems Timothy had known from a child (n) 3. â—5 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 a little one indeed yea and we have some late considerable examples of such little ones * Token and little Book for Chiâ—dren And therefore Parents themselves according to their different calls and abilities taking in convenient help and all to forward the Pastor's work should not through humour indisposition laziness or an over-eager minding of worldly business neglect this affair of so great importance to the welfare of their Children but be solicitous to get the seeds sown in their tender hearts before the weeds of the world grow up therein and canker the soyl Even according to Natures dictates Diotima timely instill'd such notions of prudence into Socrates which rendred him famous And Cato though he kept a Tutor for his Son yet was frequent himself in teaching and examining of him in learning and natural Religion Much more should Christians as Theodosius the Great who was diligent in catechizing his Sons Arcadius and Honorius with the assistance of Arsenius A notable means was Catechizing to propagate the Reformed Religion notwithstanding the contagion of Popery as Sir Edwyn Sandys well observ'd †Survey of Religion in Europe 1593. pag. 113. mihi and it will be so to preserve it Especially if Instruction be follow'd with a 2. particular in Education and that is Watchfulness or Inspection which is a dayly putting children on exercise to practise the things wherein they have been instructed by a prudent oversight of their behaviour This domestick Episcopacy or Family discipline is of singular use for the edification of children Governors especially should watch unto al things (o) 2 Tim. 4.5 This is the most proper means to preserve the good seed which is sown from being stoln away and to guard it lest the enemy come slily and sowe tares amongst the wheat which he lays wait to do if he can take Parents asleep or inobservant (p) Mat. 13.25 when they should be awake in this good government (q) 1 Tim. 3.4 and intent upon it in their houshold (r) Pâ—al 101.6 7. taking special care that in practice their children be found faithful and not chargeable with riot and unruliness (s) Tit. 1.6 It is not enough to teach children the rudiments of faith worship and obedience but to bring them where the Ark is to the acts of solemn worship both in the Family and Congregation Our Saviour's Parents brought him (t) Luke 2.41 42 48 49. though he was born without sin and had not need upon that account as others have much more should others who now are not required to go so far bring theirs to worship God according to his appointment see to their reverend deportment there examine them afterward and observe their proficiency carry a jealous eye and hand over them as Job did over his (u) Job 1.5 and take care there be no connivance at palpable faults but a seasonable discountenancing of every sin in the dearest of them (w) Gen 49.6 no allowance of any practice dissonant to that which is right (x) Deut. 33.9 with 13.6 and Exod. 32.28 Zach. 13 6. but a solicitous care that they do not decline and apostatize or be not seduced from the pure worship of the holy God and the good ways they have acquainted them with (y) Jos 22.27 c. Gen. 24.6 7. 18.19 We know Abraham that Father of blessed memory commanded his children as was noted before and there was a positive Law after to command children upon their lives to observe and do what God enjoyned (z) Deut. 32.46 47. This belongs to the training up of youth to a good habit which will not easily be removed (a) Prov. 22.6 They that handle this matter wisely will find good (b) 16.20 in their children and to do it so as to avoid undue lenity and severity is great prudence For it requires
and soul Is that man fit to govern another that can't rule himself Is he that hath drowned his reason capable of instructing one that which requires some vvisdom to understand and learn and more to teach Are not Sots that can't speak sense in a sweet frame to speak to God in Prayer or to read a Chapter What have such to do to take God's name into their mouths which hate to be reformed O that wicked Masters would consider that their wickedness doth not only hazzard the damnation of a single soul but even of all that are under their charge Is it not enough to have your own sins to be lay'd to your charge are all your oaths and lyes and wickedness too little to sink you but you must make your Servants sins yours Is one damnation too little but you must seek to double it Are those flames so cool and tolerable that you are busie in adding fuel to that terrible fire to make it burn seven times hotter What a hell must such a mans house be in which the Name of God is scarce heard except it be in an oath or a curse Is there a blessing like to be in the house on which God's curse rests Friends I believe you would be loth your children should have Cham's curse and be servants to a Tyrant and a Slave Prov. 3.33 Pythagoras a wicked man is both Masters if you would have your servants obey your commands you must not break God's If you would have them sober you must not be drunk if you would have them chast you must not be filthy if you would have them true you must not be false if you would have them good you must not be bad your selves Your example signifieth more to them than your precept do not undo that by your actions and life which you would build up by your words O! little do wicked Masters think what a plague they are to a City what a curse to a Family and what inevitable ruin they expose their own and other souls bodies and estates to except infinite power and mercy step in quickly to prevent it Secondly Take heed of idleness carelessness and trusting your Servants too much A master's negligence tempts the Servant to unfaithfulness When Masters are idle abroad usually the Servants are so at home It can't well be expected that when the Master is spending his time foolishly and unaccountably in the Coffee-houses Ale-houses or Taverns the Servant should spend his wisely in the Shop especially where he observes that the Master never minds which end goes foremost never examines his Books nor calls him to any account O this sin of idleness that Sodomitical soul-debasing body-weakning Ez. 16.49 estate-wasting sin Have we a mind to try whether God will rain such another storm of brimstone upon us as once he did upon them Seneca O how many persons are very prodigal of that commodity which will shortly be very precious Sirs do you never take a Bible in your hands do you never read how much God is displeased with sloth how oft he forbids it Rom. 12.11 Prov. 18.19 Can you call your spending three or four hours together in an idle house in insignificant chat redeeming the time Is neglecting your Servants the way to make them faithful O think of these things before it is too late I know men have their excuses and can easily evade what I say But believe it it is one thing to deal with a poor Minister and another thing to deal with God and a thousand of your pleas when they are cast into his ballance at the Day of Judgment will be found light If men must be judged for idle words I believe they will scarce be acquitted for idle actions I wish we that are Masters could oft speak to our selves in that brave Emperor's language Antoninus l. 5. n. 1. In the morning when thou findest thy self unwilling to rise consider with thy self presently it is to go about a man's work that I am stirred up am I unwilling to do that for which I was born and brought into this world was I made for this to lay me down and make much of my self in a warm bed O but this is pleasing And was it for this that thou wert born that thou mightest take thy pleasure Was it not in truth that thou shouldest alwayes be busie and in action Seest thou not how every thing is busie in its kind to perform what belongs to it in its place c. and you use to say If you keep the shop the shop will keep you If you keep not your eye upon your servant when you hope to find an honest man you may meet a thief Thirdly Take heed who you admit into your Family One that is born of wicked debauched Parents and hath had nothing but bad examples and seldom good precepts that hath been accustomed to lying and baseness from the Cradle that hath not been taught to read and knows neither his duty to God nor man that is ignorant of God Christ Soul Heaven Hell and consequently is not capable of lying under the force of the most powerful motives to faithfulness Psal 101 3. David was huge cautious in this point a lyer should not dwell in his house As good servants bring a blessing along with them into the Families where they come Gen. 39 5. so sometimes wicked servants bring a curse with them into the house where they come Little do Masters think how much dammage a neglect in this may bring upon them their estate may insensibly be wasted their other Servants infected their Children be corrupted and provisions laid in to feed their sorrows all their days Never talk of what thou shalt have with them how responsable their Parents be will this ballance the hazard of your Childrens Souls Sooner take a toad into your bosome then a wicked servant into your Family Fourthly Take heed of putting your Servants upon too much work It 's the way to alienate their affections to make them almost uncapable of doing their duty as they should to God it puts them upon cryes and groans to him Exod. 2.24 that hath ever an ear open to the complaints of the oppessed by this you make them more blockish and less ingenuous and consequently not so fit to carry on your business so much for your interest as else they might do remember how contrary this is to humanity How would you like this in others Were the Egyptians to be justified for their great burdens wherewith they loaded the Israelites and the Turks to be commended for the hard vassalage they put poor Christians to I know you readily censure both these and how can you condemn either when you imitate both Is your sin less because against greater light except you desire the curse of God and man too take heed of this sin You may learn more mercy from an Heathen than you ever practised For he tells you Seneca
most just and righteous in all his dealings Isa 45.21 Psal 92.15 Jam. 6.3 Psâ—l 103.14 Mat. 3.17 Mic. 7.18 Exod. 34.6 Psal 25.4 Job 36.22 Isa 28.26 Rom. 8.26 Psal 32.8 Isa 43.2 Dan. 3.25 Psal 23.1 Psal 34.10 Psal 19.11 Psal 31.19 20 who can accuse him of the least unrighteousness who can say he hath done him wrong and that be is a hard Master Come let any testifie against God and make good their charge if they can Is not he full of pity and ready to forgive how ready to moderate his anger when he is highly provoked It is not without good reason that the Prophet saith Who is a God like unto our God and he is ready to teach his servants and to help their infirmities and if their work be hard he doth bear the heavier part of it He is ready to keep them company to succour and encourage and comfort them he provides all things needful for them he delights in the prosperity of his Servants and loves to see his Servants thrive he gives them many a token of his love here But O what great things hath he laid up for them eye hath not seen nor ear heard neither hath it entred into the heart of man to conceive it Their reward is exceeding great sure and eternal O what harm would it do you to be like God do not your Servants deserve more kindness from you than you or any other doth from God Secondly Consider what need your Servants have of your utmost care in the fore-mentioned particulars They are young unexperienced heady nay naturally ignorant proud dead Children of wrath enemies to God every moment in danger of miscarrying and at whose hand will their blood be required think you if you do not your duty to warn reprove correct them Thirdly Consider how much it will be for your honour How high an esteem will all good men have for you how great a value must wise Magistrates set on you what reason hath the City and Corporation to rise up and call such blessed how great and how common a good such are is scarce to be expressed such shall have a good report in spite of wickedness your Servants can't but look upon you as their Counseller Master Father and give you suitable respect and honour Fourthly Consider how pleasing and acceptable this is to God Such the Lord is nigh to his eyes behold with delight It is not he that observes his great Sacrifices it is not he that makes many Prayers it is not he that makes the greatest show of Religion outwardly that is accepted Hierocles Josh 24.15 Psal 1.3 Mat. 25.34 but it is he that gives up his heart first to God as a warm Sacrifice full of love and then his house unto the Lord this this is the man that God will visit comfort bless this is he that ere long shall hear his great Master's commendation and have a welcome to Glory Fifthly Consider how much profit and pleasure you shall have here by your diligence and care you may be enriched there 's God's promise for your security By this your Trade is like to thrive your credit rise greatly Prov. 28.20 Prov. 10.6 your custome increase And when the careless Master makes hast to poverty a wise diligent and faithful is in the most likely way to get improve and keep an estate I might say what pleasure and comfort a man can't but take in his Family when every one acts regularly in their place Sixthly Consider how much good your faithfulness may do others Your Servants may for ought that I know call you their Spiritual Fathers and bless God for ever for your examples exhortations prayers and your Servants may instruct your Children and be frequently instilling one good thing or other into them and influence them more than you are aware of You are a mighty help to poor Ministers you help to plow up the ground and make it fit for the Divine seed you pull out the stones you weed up the roots of bitterness or at least keep them from thriving and growing up you harrow in the good seed you water it with your tears and God will make it fruitful you pluck up the darnel and the tares Of all the persons living we Ministers are most beholding to good Masters and good Parents we beseech you if you have any love for us or our Master either be faithful in this thing Epictâ—tus O make us glad when so many thousands are making us sad with their wickedness I might add your Examples draw others and make bad Citizens good Seventhly Consider the danger of your neglect if you be unfaithful you expose body soul estate wife children servants and all to sin ruine shame and the curse of God for ever you break the rules of equity and humanity you forfeit your reputation you go the likeliest way to work to bring upon you dismal calamities in your life worse at death and worst of all after death Mat. 25.26 Mat. 24.48 49.50 51. O consider this you that forget God and your duty and read that Scripture often you see quoted in the Margent I shall now crave leave to expostulate the case with Masters about their duty for I am loth to leave you till I have prevailed with you to set to your work like Christians Sirs you have heard your duty and what have you to object against it can you prove that that which I have desired of you is not required by God himself Have I not proved what I have said by plain Scriptures and doth not reason and humanity as well as Christianity oblige you to the putting these duties in practice have I not laid down many Motives to press you to your duty have I not told you what a Master God is to his Servants and put you upon being followers of him as dear children Would it be any disparagement to you to follow so perfect and unerring an example Doth not he teach direct help encourage and reward his Servants Is not he faithful to his promise tender pityful and easie to be reconciled and ready to forgive And are you not very well pleased with these properties in God And if this be amiable in God why should it not be lovely in you God humbleth himself to look upon what is done on earth and is it below you to look upon and take care of your Servants What great difference is there I pray between you and them Are they not of the same mould And shortly your bones and skuls will not be distinguished Why did you take them into your Family if you intended to take no more care of them than of a Dog Was it not a piece of base falshood in you to promise and engage what you never intended to perform Methinks I have a mind to debate this matter fairly with you so as to leave you resolved for your duty or without any reason or excuse for the neglect of it Sirs Is
duty and not to despise the cause of his hand-maid What then said he should I do when God shall rise up and when he visiteth what shall I answer him Let death when he comes find you doing the best work Ar. Epict. l. 3. c. 15. Antoninus l. 2. n. 2. and faithful in your place I shall conclude this with the advice of that gallant Emperour Let it be thy earnest care constantly to perform every thing thou art about with justice to every one which you may well do if you go about every act as your last I am now come to the last thing which I promised to do and that is to shew What is the Duty of Servants and that I shall perform in the same method as I did before 1. By giving them some cautionary Directions 2. Some positive Directions and pressing these with some Motives and give them some Helps for the better performance of their Duty 1. I shall give Servants some cautionary Directions First Let Servants take heed of pride This was the sin of the Angels this made them Devils this was the sin of our first Parents 1 Tim. 3.6 this made them rebellious to God A humble heart is ready for any work or state that God in his providence calls him to any thing but sin will down with a humble man Remember pride unfits for the service of God and man makes one think himself fitter to command than to be commanded that makes one go on heavily with their work impatient of reproof ready to answer again malepert saucy ready to commit other sins to gratifie their pride A proud Servant will scorn to be catechized called to an account or be kept under those bounds that reason and Religion set Humility doth no body any harm brings no dishonour or inconveniency but is as good a security to reputation comfort and profit as any thing I know Secondly Take heed of disobedience to the lawful commands of your Master Think not that your arrogance bigness and parentage will bear you out It may be you think scorn that your Master should correct you and you say in your mind that you will give him as good as he brings know this that if you have a Master that may be low-spirited weak or poor and it may be such a one that is loth to deal with you as Law and Religion gives him leave yet are you too strong for God Is he afraid of your swelling and big looks Will he count you innocent Is not your rebellion and disobedience to your Master disobedience and rebellion against God And can his purity suffer long or his justice bear such impâ—â—â—â—y always without some signification of his displeasure Must the great ones of the world that break his Laws feel his power and shall such a despicable wretch as thou go unpunished Remember what is said of disobedience to the lawful commands of Magistrates holds here Whosoever resisteth shall receive to himself damnation Rom 13.2 Thirdly Take heed of negligence idleness carelesness By this you rob your Master of what in honesty you should and might have got for him by this you secretly waste your Master and answer not that trust that is put in you and is justly expected from you by this you give just occasion of displeasure to your Master by this you break your promise made to your Master and provoke God highly Mat. 5 26. Remember what a sentence the wicked slothful Servant must shortly hear Fourthly Take heed of mere eye-service Is the eye of God nothing to you and his warnings insignificant Col. 3.12 Doth not he in plain words forbid this O how many such Servants be there that when their Master is by are very diligent but when his back is turned then how lazy how wanton how careless Would you be served thus your selves if you were Masters Doth God take no notice at all and if he do how do you think he liketh such doings Is it a small matter to make light of his presence and if it be so you shall shortly find to your cost that his eye was more than your Master 's upon you and if you will not believe his knowledg observation and eye his hand shall shortly give you such a demonstration of both as you shall not be able to slight Fifthly Take heed of Lying By a lye you deny God's knowledg you make one fault two you make your self an enemy to humane society that is a sin which is hateful to every honest man and abominable to the Lord the lyar shall be shut out of Heaven Prov. 6.17 Rev. 21.8 and have his portion in that Lake that burns for ever I spare to speak how it spoils a man's credit and feeds jealousies in a Master and maketh him scarce believe you when you speak truth O! little do Servants think what folly they are guilty of by covering their faults with a lye Little do they think how dear that sin must cost them either here by deep repentance or hereafter by intolerable torments Sixthly Take heed of purloining or imbezeling any part of your Master's goods for your own use Tit. 2.10 Luke 16.6 Meddle with nothing but what is your own and is allowed you you would be loth any one should call you a Thief I pray then take care of that which will make you deserve such a name do not consent to any that are in the least guilty in that kind be not partners with a Thief and make not your self an accessory to another's wickedness by concealing any unfaithfulness of that nature in your fellow-servants after you have roundly warned them your self eat not of the junkets that sensuality wantonness and theft hath provided If you would know what such doings tend to in a word I may tell you they pamper lust many times end in uncleanness murder a prison a halter and if that were all it were not so bad in comparison by this you wrong God and man fear your conscience and make way for a world of other sins and bring speedy and sure damnation except a thorow repentance prevent it Seventhly Take heed of bad companions have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness but rather reprove them O how many hopeful youths are blasted by wicked company I am not ignorant of the high pretences of love that such may have and what excuses they may palliate their wickedness with but please none to displease God never count him your friend nor one that will do you a kindness that would lead you to sin the devil damnation Eighthly Take heed of disclosing your Master's secrets do not speak any thing that may wound his reputation make no mention of his faults without you are called to it lawfully and then not without deep regret and trouble upon the account of God's honour and his soul Some Servants make nothing of prating against their Masters and Mistresses behind their backs little considering that this is a sin
the neglect of them as proceeding from licentiousness what saith the Apostle Who art thou that judgest another man's Servant verse 4. And But why dost thou judg or set at naught thy Brother For we must all stand before the Judgment-seat of Christ verse 10. As if he had said thou dost set thy self in the Throne of God and thou dost take God's work out of his hands 2. This is a manifest breach of the Laws of God and of Christ The things as I said before which thou dost censure and reproach another for are often-times doubtful and liable to dispute but the Command of God against this sinful practice is evident and without controversie He whom thou censurest possibly may sin but thou that dost reproach him certainly dost sin and that against clear Light and so thou dost put thy self into the Number of those that rebel against the Light which is mentioned as a great aggravation of sin Job 24.13 The Law of God hath so evidently forbidden this sin that if thy Conscience doth not smite thee for it if thou canst go on quietly in this sin it is a sign thou art in a deep sleep if not dead in Trespasses and sins That this practice is so great a breach of the Laws of God and of Christ will appear by these particulars 1. It is against particular and express Scriptures forbidding this practice The Text is evident it is not like some places of Scripture which are hard to be understood and soon wrested but it is so plain that he that runs may read it none shall dwell in God's holy Hill that allow themselves in this practice Again Exod. 23.1 Thou shalt not raise a false Report against thy Brother A false Report either that which thou knowest to be false then thou art guilty of Forgery or that which in the Issue shall be found to be false in which case thou art guilty of rashness and uncharitableness In the Hebrew it is a vain Report a report that wants the solidity of a through information and of real use to thy Neighbour Jam. 4.11 Speak not evil of another for he that speaketh evil of his Brother and judgeth his Brother speaketh evil of the Law and judgeth the Law and so in the grossest sense is an Antinomian Tit. 3.2 Ministers must put people in mind to speak evil of no man 2. This is against the fundamental Law of Love and Charity which is the chief of the Laws of God so great a Law that the rest of the Laws of God must give place to it Sacrifice Sabbaths The Worship and Service of God must frequently give place unto this duty of Mercy and Charity to men by which you may see as how great a duty this is so how great a sin the violation of this command is God accepts no man's person he regards no Service where this is wanting Though men pretend or express never so much love to God though they do or suffer never so much for him yet if they have not Charity it prositeth nothing 1 Cor. 13.3 and 1 Joh. 3.10 In this the Children of God are manifest and the Children of the Devil whosoever doth not righteousness is not of God neither he that loveth not his Brother 1 Joh. 4.20 If a man say I love God and hateth his Brother he is a Lyar for he that loveth not his Brother whom he hath seen how can he love God whom he hath not seen But possibly some may ask who then is my Brother to the love of whom I am thus obliged Possibly he is one of my own party and Religion and such I do love No every man is thy Brother in this sense and the object of thy Love 'T is true good men are the principal objects of thy Love but not the only objects of it the commands of the Gospel in this matter are general 1 Pet. 2.17 Honour all men love the Brother-hood that is Love them in a more eminent degree Gal. 6.10 As we have opportunity let us do good to all men especially to the Houshold of Faith But now all Persons yea even those that censure and reproach others will pretend they love them but be not deceived if thou dost sincerely love thy Neighbour thou wilt be ready to do all good Offices for him to seek his Good to maintain his Credit to Interpret all things in the best sense to cover his failings 1 Pet. 4.8 Charity will cover a multitude of sins Didst thou love thy Neighbour thou wouldst not be so apt to censure him so greedy to hear nor so ready to believe evil reports concerning him When God shall come at the last day to try men's Love to their Brethren by the Rules and Characters of it which he did prescribe in the first Epistle to the Corinthians 13th Chapter I doubt multitudes of Persons will be found deeply guilty that thought themselves in a manner wholly Innocent You should do well to study that Chapter and to labour throughly to understand it and that I commend to you as an excellent Antidote against this wicked practice 2. This is a sin against that great and Royal Law of Christ which even the Heathens have admired and the Emperour Severus did so highly applaud Mat. 7.12 Whatsoever ye would that men should do to you do ye even so to them for this is the Law and the Prophets Now let your own Consciences answer the Question would you be thus dealt with by others Would you have all your Infirmities sharply censured Your secret miscarriages published to the World The whole course of your Lives ript up and all your actions severely examined No no they that are so forward to censure the real or supposed miscarriages of others would have their own more tenderly dealt with And generally those that are most severe Judges of others are most partial to themselves they that will most freely defame other men will not endure to be reproved and admonished themselves They that will turn the edge of the Sword to others would have the back only turned to themselves 3. It is sin against the great Law of maintaining Peace amongst men This is prescribed as a remedy against this very sin Rom. 14.9 Let us therefore follow after the things that make for Peace and things wherewith we may Edifie one another Heb. 12.4 Follow Peace with all men Rom. 12.18 If it be possible as much as lyeth in you live peaceably with all men He saith indeed if it be possible because in some cases it is impossible to have peace with wicked men without the neglect of our Duty and without the loss of Truth and Holiness but as far as it is possible we are obliged to promote it But what Peace can there be in the midst of Censures and Reproaches The Natural Off-spring of such Parents are Contentions Divisions Animosities while Peace lyes bleeding and languishing 4. It is against that great Command laid upon all Christians of excelling other men Christ
their hearts and alter their course and who knows at what day or hour he 'l come So long as there 's Life there 's hope of their Conversion What a wicked Son was Manasse yet God wrought upon him at last What a sad life did the Prodigal live yet he returned to his Father at last God can turn notorious Sinners into eminent Saints wait therefore but do not fret 3. The Case is sad but discontent will do no good in it Earnest prayer and quiet submission may do much but impatience will do nothing It troubles me much when I see gracious Parents vexing themselves for their ungracious Children Alas by this they do but hurt themselves but do no good to them 4. I suppose it to be but your affliction not your sin You have done your duty in godly education in setting a good example in exhorting 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Metrocles to Stilpo concerning his bad daughter in Plutarch's Moralâ— p. 458 reproing c in praying to God for your Children if after all this they will be naught their blood will be required of themselves you have freed your souls from their eternal ruine and perdition 5. God will secure and advance his own glory That 's the thing that cuts you that God should be dishonoured by any that descends from you but as to that satisfie your selves he will even by your sinful Relations one way or other promote his honour If he be not glorified by them which we should desire he will be glorified upon them which we must submit unto 'T is to many Divines an unquestionable truth that when at the day of Judgment the sentence of condemnation shall be pronounced upon wicked Children their Godly Parents shall so rest in God's will and be so swallowed up in his glory that they shall not grieve at this sentence but rather rejoyce at it Now then if God here will harden their hearts and give them up to their own Lusts though you are not to rejoyce at this yet you ought quietly to submit to it 6. 'T is good to reflect upon the grace of God to your selves and to consider that 't is infinite mercy that you are not as bad as they Discriminating grace if duly thought of would be an excellent Antidote against Passion in the present tryal But I must say no more of this I have as briefly as I could for the matter would have admitted of far greater enlargement gone over two grand Cases the one referring to the Estate the other to Relations * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Nazianz. Orat. 16. H w Consideration is to be managed for the manner of it and shewn under each how consideration is to be acted in order to Contentment There is a third referring to the Body 1. With respect to deformity 2. To defects 3. To infirmittes pain sickness an affliction both very common and also very †great to which I would fain have spoken something but I must forbear lest I should too much exceed the bounds of such a discoutse as this is Onely there is a third General which I propounded at the first to say something of which I will but just touch upon and so dispatch this firâ—t Help or Means to the learning of Contentment Hitherto I have been directing you as to the matter of consideration Now I am to direct you as to the manner of it He that would so consider as thereby to get and keep his heart settled and composed under every trouble he must be therein frequent speedy serious 1. Frequent If you be but seldom in the practice of this duty you will never arrive at being masters of the divine art of Contentment You must consider again and again by repeated thoughts to work upon your hearts that which is proper for the quieting of them By much chasing the ointment pierceth into the part affected and so it gives ease When the disease is hard to be cured or apt to return the remedy must be often useds and so 't is here As to the prevention or removal of Discontent the mind must be often in consideration Plutar. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 The fiercest creatures by frequent converse become more tame and governable Dogs bark not at those to whom they are used The Moralist applies it to the Passions of the mind which do in a great measure lose their fierceness and are more easily brought under command when a man inures himself to consideration 2. Speedy As soon as ever the hellish fire of Discontent begins to kindle in thy heart presently think of that which may be as water for the quenching of it If you let it alone like other fires 't will get such a head that it will be too hard for you Impatience is the soul in mutiny against God now Mutinies in an Army must be suppressed speedily 'T is good to take the distemper at the beginning as soon as there 's any commotion in the spirit because of this or that cross immediately retire ply the heart with consideration reason with your selves Is not all of God Shall not all be for good and so on as hath been directed Nay indeed 't would be of great advantage to us to be before hand with the affliction not only to see it before it comes but to lay up heart-quieting thoughts for it against it shall come How is an evil * res adversas infregit quisquis prior vidit Senec. de Traâ—q An. lessened by the fore-sight of it praevisi mali mollior ictus how patiently is it undergone when one hath had some forecast in his thoughts about it Few are so fit for consideration after a trouble as they are before it the foregame is much easier to be plaid than the aftergame And its efficacy too is the greater when persons are so early at it Before God strikes the blow cast with your selves What if my Child or my Estate should be taken from me how should I bear such an affliction contentedly why things stand thus or thus and therefore I must be contented What would follow upon this Why matters being digested before-hand the mind would be the more still when the evil shall actually seize upon you 3. Serious Loose and careless and sudden thoughts signifie but little to a froward heart but when they are intent and fixed so as to dwell upon what lies before them then they have a good effect The plaister must lye upon the sore and then it works the cure When consideration is managed with the utmost intention of the mind with the staying of the soul upon the proper object then and never but then doth it further contentation So much for the first Help or means The second Help to contentment viz. Godliness 2. The second is Godliness The Apostle links them together 1 Tim. 6.6 Godliness with contentment is great gain what may be the reason of this connexion Not only because they do ever accompany each the other or
let him reprove me To give and take reproofs is a Dictate of the Law of Nature whereby every man is obliged to seek the Good of others and to promote it according to their ability and opportunity The former is directed by that love which is due unto others the latter by that which is due unto our selves which two are the great Rules and give measure to the Duties of all Societies whether Civil or Spiritual Wherefore it doth not evacuate a Reproof or Discharge him who is reproved from the duty of attending unto it that he by whom it is managed is not Righteous yea is openly wicked For the Duty it self being an effect of the Law of Nature it is the same for the substance of it by whomsoever it is performed Yea oft-times such Moral or rather immoral Qualifications as render not only the Reprover less considerable but also the Reproof it self until thoroughly weighed and examined obnoxious unto prejudicate Conceptions do occasion a greater and more signal Exercise of Grace and Wisdom in him that is reproved than would have been stirred up had all things concurred unto the exact Regularity of the Reproof However it is desirable on many accounts that he who Reproves us be himself a Righteous person and be of us esteemed so to be For as such a one alone will or can have a due sense of the evil reproved with a right Principle and End in the Discharge of his own Duty so the minds of them that are reproved are by their sense of his Integrity excluded from those insinuations of evasions which prejudices and Suggestions of just causes of Reflections on their Reprover will offer unto them especially without the exercise of singular Wisdom and humility will all the Advantages of a just Reproof be lost where the allowed practice of greater sins and evils than that Reproved is daily chargeable on the Reprover Hence is that Reflection of our Saviour on the useless Hypocritical Diligence of men in pulling the mote out of their Brother's eyes whilst they have beams in their own Mat. 7.3 4 5. The Rule in this Case is If the Reprover be a Righteous person consider the Reprover first and then the Reproof if he be otherwise consider the Reproof and the Reprover not at all II. The Nature of a Reproof is also to be considered and this is three-fold for every Reproof is either Authoritative or Fraternal or merely Friendly and occasional Authoritative Reproofs are either 1 Ministerial or 2 Parental or 3 Despotical 1. There is an especial Authority accompanying Ministerial Reproofs which we ought especially to consider and improve Now I understand not hereby those Doctrinal Reproofs when in the Dispensation of that Word of Grace and Truth which is profitable for Correction and Reproof 2 Tim. 3.16 they speak and exhort and rebuke the sins of men with all Authority Tit. 2.15 but the occasional Application of the Word unto individual persons upon their unanswerableness in any thing unto the Truth wherein they have been instructed For every Right Reproof is but the orderly Application of a Rule of Truth unto any Person under his miscarriage for his healing and recovery Where therefore a Minister of the Gospel in the Preaching of the Word doth declare and Teach the Rule of Holy obedience with Ministerial Authority if any of the Flock committed to his charge shall appear in any thing to walk contrary thereunto or to have transgressed it in any offensive Instance as it is his Duty the discharge whereof will be required of him at the great Day particularly to apply the Truth unto them in the way of private personal Reproof so he is still therein accompanied with his Ministerial Authority which makes his Reproof to be of a peculiar nature and as such to be accounted for For as he is thus commanded as a Minister to Exhort Rebuke Admonish and reprove every one of his charge as occasion shall require so in the doing of it he doth discharge and Exercise his Ministerial Office and Power And he that is wise will forego no considerations that may give efficacy unto a just and due Reproof especially not such a one as if it be neglected will not only be an aggravation of the evil for which he is reproved but will also accumulate his guilt with a contempt of the Authority of Jesus Christ Wherefore the Rule here is The more clear and evident the representation of the Authority of Christ is in the Reproof the more Diligent ought we to be in our Attendance unto it and compliance with it He is the great Reprover of his Church Rev. 3.19 All the use Power Authority and efficacy of Ecclesiastical Reproofs flow Originally and are derived from him In Ministerial reproofs there is the most express and immediate Application of his Authority made unto the minds of men which if it be carelesly slighted or proudly despised or evacuated by perverse cavillings as is the manner of some in such cases it is an open evidence of an Heart that never yet sincerely took upon it his Law and Yoke These things are spoken of the Personal Repoofs that are given by Ministers principally unto those of their respective Flocks as occasion doth require wherein I shall pray that our Lord Jesus Christ the great Shepherd of the Sheep would yet make us all more Faithful and diligent as the season wherein we live doth abundantly require it But moreover Church-censures in Admonition and Excommunication have the nature and ends of Ministerial reproofs But the handling of their nature and use with the Duties of those persons who justly fall under them and the benefit which they may reap thereby is too long and large a subject to be here diverted unto 2. Authoritative reproof is Parental Reproof is indeed one of the greatest and most principal Duties of Parents towards Children and without which all others for the most part do but pamper them unto slaughter and Ruine Neglect hereof is that which hath filled us with so many Hophni's Phinease's and Absolom's whose outragious wickednesses are directly charged on the sinful lenity and neglect in this matter even of godly Parents And indeed whereas some Parents are openly vicious and debauched even in the sight of their Children in a sensual neglect and contempt of the Light of Nature whereby they lose all their Authority in reproving as well as all Care about it and whereas the most have so little regard unto sin as sin whilst things are tolerably well in outward concerns that they neglect the reproof of it as such and many through a foolish contemptible prevalency of fond Affection will take no notice of the sinful follies extravagancies and miscarriages of their Children until all things grow desperate with them but sooth up and applaud them in such effects of Pride Vanity and Wantonness as ought to be most severely reproved in them the woful and dreadful degeneracy of the Age wherein we live owes it self