not you see he doth not mourn as he is a Child and stands in that Relation but as he hath Flesh that is pained by the strokes Might not he cry out under the Rod and yet be a stubborn Child a disobedient Child and not desire his Father's love in the way of his Duty nor lay to heart his Father's displeasure for the Evil he hath done Will you ask me Sir Are you sure God is displeased with me because by Death he hath removed my Relation from me I will ask you Are you sure that he is not Which doth it look most like Love or Displeasure And if you are not sure he is not displeased with you under such a Rod should not you sorrow lest he should be displeased Is the displeasure of God so small a thing in your Eye that the fear of it should not be ground of your Sorrow And say what if God should be angry with me in what he hath taken from me What if my Father should be displeased and the Death of this Relation be the fruit of it Is not here ground to sorrow as a Christian as well as a Man The loss of a good Husband or Wife Father Mother or Child is a burden heavy to be born but the loss of the favour of God is greater and his displeasure presseth more hard upon a Soul sensible of it and therefore prays O Lord if thou rebuke me let it not be in thine anger if thou chasten me let it not be in thy sore displeasure Psalm 6.1 The loss of a Relation is a Rebuke it is a chastening and it may be in anger and displeasure when it is so Sorrow for God's displeasure as Christians as for your own Affliction as Men. 3. When you Sorrow more for the loss of your Temporal Good by the Death of your Relation than for the Spiritual Advantage you might have gained by the continuance of their Lives You sorrow too much as Men but too liâ—tle as Christians You may sorrow for the one as well as for the other but you should not sorrow so much for the one as for the other because the one is better than the other and the loss of the one a greater loss than the other By their Death you sustain the loss of some outward Comforts for your Body and loss of some inward Advantages for your Soul as now they can instruct and teach you no more they can pray with you and for you no more they can help you to answer your doubts about your Spiritual State no more nor give you Arguments against your own Corruptions or Satan's Temptations any more nor reprove you for your Sin nor comfort you under your Afflictions nor exhort you to be making holy Preparations for Death nor direct you therein any more for ever nor by their continued Example stir you up to secret Prayer to maintain Communion with God all these were great Advantages you had by the Life of your holy Relations and by their Death they cease For this you do not sorrow saying My Godly Father my Holy Mother made many a Prayer shed many a Tear for me they pleaded with God for Grace and Mercy and Pardon for me but Death hath broken off the continuance of their Prayers and what a loser am I thereby They did observe and watch my Life and Actions what was Evil they reproved me for what was Good they did incâ—urage and countenance me in but Death hath closed their Eyes that they can now see neither Good nor Evil in me and hath tied their Tongue that they can speak no more to me concerning the one nor the other and who can tell the greatness of my loss for my Immortal Soul that I am under by their Death The like might be said concerning a Religious Husband an holy Zealous Wife Wherefore if you mourn never so much for your loss by their Death as to your Bodies and outward Estate and not so much as to your loss to your Soul and spiritual Condition it 's more like Men than Christians 4. When you Sorrow more for the want of their Company in Life than you do for want of a sanctified improvement of their Death you sorrow too much as Men and too little as Christians Nature helps you to the one but it must be Grace that must inable you to do the other Your Father or Mother Husband or Wife or Child is dead and you sit down and sorrow and say I shall never see these in my house any more they shall never sit with me at my Table any more they shall lodge in my Bed no more and dwell with me on Earth no more for ever I shall see them no more whom I did love to look upon when they were absent from me a Week or two a Month or two A Month a Day or two how glad was I at their return If their absence filled me with Sorrow their presence again did drive away my Sorrow and renewed my Joy If I parted with them when to go a Journey I did it with Tears of Grief but when they returned I received them with Tears of Joy If I sorrowed that they were gone yet the hopes of their safe return did asswage my Sorrow But now they are gone without return They have taken a long Journey and never to me will come back again They were use to take their leave and say farewel till I see you again but now they took their leave saying The Lord be with you for I shall be with you no more Oh this word no more doth even break my heart what my Father or Mother gone and shall I see them no more my Wife or Husband gone and shall I set mine Eyes on him or her no more My dear Child gone looking on whom did delight my Eyes and must I see him no more I look for my Relations at my Table but their place is empty and I cannot see them there I lock but I cannot see them I go to the Chamber where they did use to sit and Work or to the Closet where they did use to Pray but I cannot see them there I see the Work but them I cannot see I see their Hand-writing but them I cannot see I see their wearing Clothes but them that did use to wear them I cannot see to see these and not them doth renew and encrease my Sorrow when I can see these every day and no day can see them the more I multiply my Sorrow and methinks this Sorrrow is pleasent Sorrow and this Grief is delightful Grief and when I feel Sorrow added to Sorrow at the remembrance of them I must see no more methinks it pleaseth me to remember them tho it grieves me that I can not must not see them nor enjoy their Company nor my comfort in their Company any more for ever Is this your Sorrow And have you nothing else to do than to feed your Sorrow And please your self with this kind of Sorrow
not so it is easy to judge your sorrow is over-much Q. 7. Is not your sorrow over-much when it hinders you and keeps you from rejoycing in God from praising of him and giving thanks unto him for the mercies you have mixed with your affliction Have not you more Mercies left than you have lost have not you greaeter Mercies continued than are removed is your Earthly Father dead but have not you still a Father in Heaven is your Wife dead but is not your Soul married to Christ and though the Conjugal Union be broken by Death yet doth not the Mystical Union betwixt Christ and you still remain have not you the pardon of Sin the favour of God the sense of his Love and Hopes of Heaven seriously set these over against your Dead and say if you have not more cause to rejoice in God and give him thanks for these than you have to mourn for your Dead and whether God doth not command you more and give you a stricter charge sor these to rejoice in him than to mourn for your Dead and consequently is the grand constant Duty you owe to God all the days of your Life and are you so much indebted to your dead as you are to the Living God Was their Life of so much worth to you as your Relation to God is and your Receivings from him see your Duty and cease from that which hinders your performance of it Phil. 3.1 Finally my Brethren rejoice in the Lord. Whatsoever state you are in serve God with joyful hearts Phil. 4.4 Rejoice in the Lord alway and again I say rejoice Always rejoice in the Lord What whâ—n my Father or Mother or Child Wife or Husband lieth dead in my House or is newly lodged in the Grave Is it not alway you are commanded to rejoice is there this Exception when you have any Relation dead that then this should be no Duty Have not Christians always greater cause of rejoycing in the Lord than they have of sorrow for Worldly Losses is not holy joy in the Lord and a thankful praising of God the very Flower of Religion and makes us most like the Angels and Saints above but can you thus rejoice and praise and magnifie God and triumph in his Love and Grace when you are overwhelmed with sorrow for the loss of Worldly Comforts and is not that sorrow too much that unfits you for this constant standing Duty 1 Thes 5.16 Rejoice evermore 17. Pray without ceasing 18. In every thing give thanks for this is the will of God in Jesus Christ concerning you Whatever a true Believer doth lose he should rejoice because the Grounds and Reasons and Causes of Joy do still remain and in every Case and Condition of life should give thanks to God for as much as the Good that continueth to him doth exceed the Evils that do befal him This is God's revealed Will making it our Duty for the great Blessings we receive from him by Christ Job's sorrow for the loss of ten Children in one day by a strange unusual death added to all his former Losses making his Case more sorrowful than yours was kept within such Bounds as that he was able even then to bless and praise the Lord. Job 1.19 They are dead 21. He said naked came I out of my mother's womb and naked shall I return thither the Lord gave and the Lord hath taken away blessed be the name of the Lord. In your sorrow try if you can do so if not judge whether it be not over-much Q. 8. Is not that sorrow for your dead over-much which doth deaden your Heart towards God in all Holy Duties You were wont to pray with a lively Heart and to hear the Word of God with warm Affections but now you pray with a dead Heart and hear with dull Affections Your Love and Desires and Delights are become as cold in your Duties as your Relations Corps are in the Grave What have you done in your sorrow taken away a lively Heart towards God and laid a dead Child a dead Father or Wife in the room of it Like the Woman in Solomon's Reign whose Child did die in the Night and there being another Woman in the House that had a living Child rose and while the living Child's Mother did slâ—ep took her living Child out of her Bosom and laid her dead Child in her Bosom in the room of the living Child But these two Women contended before Solomon one saying The living Child is mine but the dead Child is thine the other also said The dead Child is thine but the living Child is mine 1 Kings 3.16 to 24. Solomon commanded a Sword to be brought to divide the living Child and to give half to the one and half to the other The true Mothers Bowels yearning towards her Child said O my Lord give her the living Child and by no means slay it the other said Let it be neither mine nor thine but divide it whereby the King discerned the Natural Mother and commanded the living Child to be given to her ver 24 25 26 27. Love filled your Heart to your living Child Sorrow fills your Heart for your dead Child You had a lively frame of Heart when your Child was living but now it is dead through over-much sorrow you have laid your dead Child in your Bosom in the room of that Activity of Soul that before you had towards God and you lay claim to the dead Child this dead Child is my Child Alas this Child that is dead is mine But whose is your Hâ—art and Love God's or your Child's Take heed this be not the true answer during this fit of excessive sorrow it is not all God's â—or all the Child's but you have divided it between both and given half to the Living God and half to the Dead Child That sorrow that causeth you to make this division is excessive sorrow Q. 9. Is not that sorrow for your dead over-much when it all runs out to them that you are not sensible of nor concerned for the Calamities of the Church nor Afflictions and Sufferings of the People of God All your sorrow is contracted and all your Tears run in this one Channel for your dead Father or Mother Husband Wife or Children are not the Concerns of the Church of God greater than your selfish Matters Are not the Sufferings and Calamities Martyrdom by Burning and Wracking and Torturing of many dear to God greater Evils than the Natural death of your Relations Did Christ shed his Blood for his Church and amongst all your Tears for your dead cannot you drop one for the Suffering Church of God Are Men shedding their Blood and for this cannot you shed a Tear when you have so many for one dead Child or Husband or Wife Should not the Concerns of the Glory of God in Publick Affairs lye nearer your Heart than a dead Relation and wound deeper and make you sorrow more You are ready to die with
God hath a right to mine because he had redeemed them with his Blood and sanctified them by his Grace and Spirit and thereby set the Mark and Character of his own upon them and what had I to do to desire to keep his own with me when he had a purpose to call them and take them home unto himself If I had forfâ—ited the Mercy of their staying with me God retained his right to dispose of them at his pleasure therefore tho I have much to say against my self I have nothing to say against God or his proceedings with me in what he hath done unto me or taken from me But when our sorrow comes to be turbulent Passion we muâ—mur and think we do well we â—epâ—â—e and justifie our evil Act and Sorrow and think we do well to sorrow on till it break over all Banks and Bounds of Modâ—ration like Jonah when God himself did ask him Dost thou well to be angry Answered yes I do well to be angry even to the death Jon. 4.9 In this case such a one being asked do you well to sorrow thus when you see God hath done his holy Will And all your sorrow is unprofitable to the dead and hurtful to your self in Excess of passionate sorrow doth reply Yes I do well to sorrow even unto death God hath afflicted me and I am afflicted and I am sorrowful and will be so Will you But pray you take heâ—d what thoughts you have of God the mean while for in turbulent sorrow its hard not to have hard and unworthy Thoughts of God and to justifie him in the midst of vexing sorrows Ans 7. In kindly sorrow for our dead our Eyes are more clear to see our Mercies in our Affliction and what God continueth to us as well as what he taketh away from us So when Children thus mourn for their dead Mother they can see Mercy in a Living Father or for a Father taken from them by death can read tho with Tears in their Eyes God's sparing Mercy in continuing their Mother Parents mourning for the death of one Child can take notice of the goodness of God in preserving the rest from the Jaws of Death and say Where God hath taken away one he might have taken two where two he might have taken all he hath taken away some and therefore we sorrow under his heavy hand but yet he hath pleased to leave more with us than he hath removed from us and therefore in our Affliction come upon us we can see God's Mercy to us or if he hath taken more than he hath left yet we have one still and in our sorrow for our dead we can see much Mercy in one Child that doth Live But when our sorrow for our dead comes to be turbulent and the Actings of corrupt Affections the sense of the Less of one Relation takes away all thankfulness for and content in all the râ—st Parents setting their Hearts upon one Child more than all the râ—st and the Love they had to that one did equal the Love to all the othâ—r they loving that most and too much God singles that out first for a Prisoner of Death and then the remaining can scarce be called Mâ—rcies if moved to mitigate their sorrow for the one that is dead by the sight of those that live say What tell you us of these when the other is gone What are these tho with us when the other is taken away from us Thus Jacob coulâ— tâ—ke no comfort from all his Sons and Daâ—ghters wheâ— he supposed his Son Joseph was dâ—ad Gen. 37.33 34 35. But correct your turbulent â—orroâ— which hinders the sigâ—t of â—â—â—d'â— Mercy in thâ—m thaâ— live lâ—st he by death remove them also and make you groan and sigh and sâ—b fâ—r them when dead which yoâ— could see no Mercy in because one did die before Ans 8. In kindly sorrow for our dead we can better sympathize with others exercised with the like dealings of God Many can sorrow for their own dead that are not affected with the death of the Relations of others especially such as are turbulently sorrowful for their own Vexing Passion in our selves is joined with least compassion to others as we narrow our Love too much to our selves and where Self-love is too much Love to others is the less or none so the sorrow for the Evils that befall our selves when vexatious and corroding is less or none for the Afflictions that come upon others Tâ—ey think their Tears are few enough to express their own sorrows or too precious to be wasted for the sorrows of others These are more hard-hearted than Jews who wept with Mary and Martha for their dâ—ceased Brother Ans 9. In kindly sorrow for our dead we shall be more mindful of our own Death and stirred up to greater Care to make Holy Preparations for it As soon as David did hear his Child was deâ—d hâ— said I must go down to it When you sorrow rightly following your dead to their Gâ—â—ve you will have serious thoughts of your own My Wife is gone and I shall shortly follow My Husband is dead and so must I be too Our Mother is loâ—ged in the Dust and after a while we must be carried to lye by her therefore we will so mourn that we may reserve some Tears of Repentance for our Sin that as our Bodies must go to her Body in the Grave so our Souls may go to her Soul in the highest Heaven But turbulent sorrow for the dead is as if they again should never live and hinders their thoughts of their own Mortality as if they should never die While they are thinking in how many days they shall Bury their dead they are hoping how many years yet they shall live What turbulent discomposing besotting sorrow is this that when these Mourners stand and see the Corps they mourn over let down into the Grave cannot see where e're long they themselves shall be lodged Ans 10. In kindly sorrow for our dead we shall be moved to perform our Relative Duties with more Tenderness and Kindness with more Care and Love to those Relations that yet are with us When the Mother is dead the Father must shew more Care than he did before or did need to do because their Mother did much ease him of it So when the Father is dead the more the Mother should take Care accordding to her Capacity When Father or Mother or both are dead the natural kindly sorrow for them will dispose their Children as Brothers and Sisters to discharge their Relative Duties and live in greater Love than ever When Jacob was dead Joseph mourned all his Brethren mourned all went up to Bury their Father and at his Burial mourned greatly After this Joseph and his Brethren returned into Egypt they remembâ—ing how cruel they had been to Joseph said Now our Father is dead our Brother will certainly requite us for all the Evil we did to him but Josâ—ph was but
newly come out of the House of Mâ—urning and he said Fear not I will nourish you and your little ones and he comforted them and spake kindly to them Gen. 50.15 21. Our mourning for the dead should end in the mending of our Carriage and the regulating of our Affections towards the Living When we are mouâ—ning for the loss of one we should be seeking the Temporal and Spirituâ—l good of the rest that yet are found with us When God hath made a Breach in our Family for whiâ—h we sorrow we must be mâ—king up the Breaches of our Duties by filling up what before was wanting Death hath made a brâ—ach in our Houses a wide bâ—each which cannot be repaired for our Dead shall never be restored to us and Sin hath made a breach in our Comforts by the breach it made in our Duties the mourning for the breach by death in those taken from us should issue in repairing the breaches in our Duties to those that are continued to us Do we sorrow much for them that are dead whom we loved too much while they did live Let the greatness of our sorrow for the one moderate our Love unto the other Do we sorrow for our dead because we did not Love them with as great a Love as we should while they were with us let this sorrow produce due greater Love to them that do remain If sorrow for our dead do not mend our faults towards the Living it is a dead and fruitless ineffectual sorrow The Living should find some advantage by our sorrow for the dead Were you froward in your Family before and shall not your sorrow meeken your Spirit for time to come Did not you take care for the Religious Education of a Child that is dead and shall not your sorrow for him and the neglect of your Duty to him move you to make up to the Living what was wanting to the Dead Did not Children obey their Father before he died If they mourn kindly for a dead Father will they not yield better Obedience to their Living Mother And say Dear and Sorrowful Mother we were wanting in our Duty to our Father when he was with us for which we are sâ—rry now he is taken from us but be not grieved over-much and we will supply the want of our Duty to him by making up the more to you as long as God shall lend yon unto us We were a grief to him but we will be a comfort unto you We will indeavour to be as good to you as we were bad to him On his Dying Bed he did complain of us for our stubborn Carriage towards him but Mother since you have lost a Loving Husband and we a tender Father for whom you and we do now sorrow we will carry our selves towards you with that reverence obedience and honour to you that you shall not complain of us on your Dying Bed as our Father did on his CHAP. VI. Resolves this Question When is our Sorrow for our dead spiritually defective tho it be naturally abundant Or when is it too little as we are Christians be it never so much as we are Men VSE III. A Caution to the Mourners for their Dead is necessary because sorrow as sorrow or sorrow as great sorrow is not all in this case to be minded but how it ought to be regulated not only as we are Men but also as we are Christians If we sorrow not at all we are unworthy of the name of men because without the workings of those natural Affections in the Principle common to all men If we sorrow with turbulent Passion vexatious fretting Grief we sorrow as sinful men we may sin in our sorrow as well as in the want of it Which is worst let the offending judge If we sorrow as the meer fruit of Natural Affection with a kindly sorrow and not turbulent we sorrow but as men because we do no more than the Human Nature prompts and puts us on to do But a greater Task lyeth upon us as Christians and to an higher step it becomes us to ascend in our sorrow as we have a Principle of Grace higher than all Principles of Nature and the Scripture a more perfect Rule to govern our sorrow by to purifie and refine it than the Light of Nature is In the first Vse we spake to such as for want of sorrow under the Loss of near Relations and of sense of God's Afflicting Hand that took them from us seem not to be men while we see them to be men but below the Rank of men in the shape of men In the second Vse we pointed at them that sorrowed as men with a kindly sorrow distinguishing them from those that sorrow as sinful men with a turbulent sorrow vitiated with the Actings of corrupt Nature In this third Vse we shall speak of sorrow in our present case not meerly as Humane but as Christian and distinguish the one from the other Do not think me over-tedious on this Sorrowful Subject for herein I do not only consult the helping of my self to bear the Hand of God upon me and the searching of my own sorrow of what kind it is but the common good of mortal men whose case in one House or other one House or other In many Houses in this great City wherein many Hundreds die every Week this must be the common case of many every day When I sit in my Study and hear the sound of that which you call the Passing-bell in the next Parish to us Cripplegate Lord think I how many art thou calling to mourn as well as me and mine And tho you speak of a Passing-bell in common course of Speech and have not your Hâ—arts affected with tâ—e hearing of your Ears yet to me it makes a doleful sound while I think it is a Passing-bell for whither are they passing their Bodies from their Houses to their Graves from the Company of their Friends and Relations to be Companions of Worms and their Souls into Eternity of Joy or Torment to God and Christ and Holy Angels or to the Devil and his Angels for ever and so pass from us as no more to return unto us out of one World into another and so pass from this to that as to find no passage from that to this any more for ever Those that have past from us to the World of Immortal Spirits out of Time into Eternity have left us behind as Mourners not for their Gain which is cause of Joy but for our own Loss which to us is cause of sorrow and our Duty is to enquire further into the Nature of it which because you must die may be useful to your sorrowful Relations or your Relations must die and leave you to mourn for them and many every day have cause of sorrow by the death of some or other the Case being a common Case but the Question not a common Question I shall propound it and endeavour to resolve it When is
our Sorrow for our Dead Spiritually defective tho it be naturally abundant Or when is it too little as we are Christians be it never so much as we are Men Ans 1. When we sorrow for the breach of the Relation made by death we sorrow as men tho in great abundance for so an Heathen may do but do not sorrow for Sin as Sin committed against God in the neglect of our Relative Duties while the Relation was continued for so only Christians can do Tho our Natural Sorrow doth abound in the first respect it is spiritually defective in the latter respect Two things taken for granted 1. Here it is taken for granted That the most Loving Relations may Sin and fail in their Relative Duties one to another for as much as we cannot yield perfect Obedience to any one of the Ten Commandments among which the Fifth contains Relative Duties And who can say tho I have transgressed all the rest yet this I have perfectly fulfilled I have heard that some have asserted that they have lived Twenty or Forty years in a Conjugal Relation without an angry word or unkind act betwixt them if so might not we say O peaceable Spirits that were in these O rare Example and seldom found But be it so is there no other Sin in these Relations but anger and angry words What! Did they pray also daily together or as much one for another as they ought and as fervently as they should Did they by all ways and means appointed by God help each other in their Spiritual Concerns as Duty did require Were there never no sinful Thoughts in their Minds one against another there is one can tell you his sinful Thoughts against some Related to him hath filled his Heart with more sorrow his Eyes with Tears and his Mouth with secret Confessions to God and cost him more Sighs and Sobs and Groans in pleading for Pardon for the Sin of his Thoughts tho resisted than any angry Words or unkind Actions ever did For the one might be more easily prevented than the other because we have a more absolute government over our Tongues and Hands than over our Thoughts What! Can any Persons in any Relation suppose Husband and Wife Parents and Children say they did never Love too much or at no time too little never did take too much care or never too little for their Relations but had that just proportion and measure of Love to them and Care for them as the perfect Rule requires So much as God commanded and no more than God allowed For my part my Prayer shall be Lord forgive my Relative Sins whilst others boast and bless themselves and say O God I thank thee I am not in this as other Men be nor as this Man And Lord let not me be as Blind as that Man that can see no Relative Sins to confess to thee or to be humbled for at thy Throne of Grace when thou wilt find some to judge him for at the Bar of thy Justice 2. The reigning Sins or Sins of Infirmities what they were or are in their kinds degrees frequency and all Aggravations committed in our respective Relations must be left to the scrutiny of every man's Conscience or to God that was an Eye-witness if Conscience was fallen asleep and will be an Impartial Judge if Conscience for the present perform not its Office of Witness Accuser and Judge These being granted that your Father or Mother Husband or Wife or Child is dead you sorrow and grieve you weep and wall you lament and mourn there is your Humanity and Natural Passion because your Relation is broke but where is your Christianity in this sorrow when you had not one Tear amongst so many for the Sins against God and them while you stood in that Relation And yet do not you see while your natural sorrow is abundant your Spiritual sorrow is defective or none at all in this respect Where are your Tears for your disobedience to your Father or Mother when alive Where is the Husband's sorrow for undue and unjust grieving of his Wife sadning her Heart and sending her by his unkindness to her Knees in secret to open her Case and pour out her Tears and Soul before God in Prayer Did you without cause make her weep when alive and shall not this in all your sorrow for her when dead make you sorrow for sinning against God and her before she died According as your Relative Sins were more or less greater or smaller when the Relation held it 's time it 's high time to sorrow for them when by death it is broke and so shew your self a Christian as well as a Man in sorrowing for your dead And do this now if you have not hitherto tho your Father or Mother Husband or Wife or Child be long since dead and turned into dust their rotted Flesh and dry Bones and bare Skull in the Grave do cry to God against you Therefore while you sorrow for their dead Bodies sorrow also for your own sinful Souls because you sinned so much against them in their Life-time 2. When you mourn for the loss of that comfort and delight that you had in loving of them and in being beloved by them be your Sorrow never so much you sorrow only as Men for so an Heathen might do but you sorrow not for the Displeasure of God by reason of those Sins which Conscience doth justly and truly charge you with committed in that Relation your Sorrow is defective as you are Christians You sinned as you were an Husband and for your sin God was displeased you sinned as you were a Father or a Mother and God was displeased for your Sin you sinned as you were a Son or a Daughter and for your Sin God was displeased and God hath by Death taken away your Wife your Child your Father or Mother you Sorrow because they are dead with great Sorrow and herein you do no more than a Man or Woman as such might do but you do not Sorrow that God is displeased which is not so much as a Christian should do You Sorrow because you are afflicted but where is your Sorrow because God is displeased You have many Tears for the loss of your Creature-comforts but have you dropped one for the loss of that Comfort that should arise from the sense of the Love of God unto your Soul You mourn for the smarting Rod that lies upon you Nature Flesh and Blood will make you feel the smart and cry out because of it but you do not grieve that by the Sin in your Relation you grieved the Spirit of God that Grace must inable you to do Are not you herein like unto a Child that is scourged by his Father he cries aloud he weeps and sobs he groans but what is it for Not because his Father is displeased this he is not troubled at but because of the smart and pain that the Rod doth make him so sensible of Do
my duty and I will obey Ans 4. In kiâ—dly Sorrow for the dead the heart is much quieted by returns of prayers made by God to the Requests that in our Sorrow we made to him When we prayed while they lived and we prayed that they might longer live if our Prayers were consistent with his purpose or that by his Grace and Spirit he would help them to dye prepared and to make an happy and comfortable end and give us grounds of hope that if they may not live with us on Earth they should live with him in Heaven That if God would take them from us he would take them to himself out of ours into Abraham 's Bosom The one he did deny which we thought would have been good for us that live the other he did grant which in sober Reason and in a composed Mind we cannot but judge to be better for them they did dye contrary to our prayers they did dye with peace and comfort and hope of Heaven according to our prayers in our kindly Sorrow for them when dead the Heart is much quieted the Mind composed we grive but are sedate we Mourn but the Spirit is calm within we Sorrow with bitter sorrow but our Sorrow is sweetned that when God did deny our prayers he did hear our prayers when he denied them in one kind he heard them in another which in his Wisdom he saw best for the Persons prayed for Thus David praying and fasting and mourning for his Child when Sick that it might live or be saved if it died when it was dead his heart was quiet in hopes that his Prayers were heard that tho the Body was for the Grave yet the Soul was for Heaven whither he also hoped he himself should go to it So after the Relation is dead we go and pray against the Workings of Corruption by reason of God's Dispensation that we might not murmur nor repine nor charge God foolishly for his dealings with us we find Sin stirring we cry to God and they are crushed we feel Temptations assaulting of us we call to Heaven sâ—t help to resist them and they are repelled we are sensible of our own weakness with Patience and due Submission to bear so great a Trial God by his Grace comes and makes it more easie than we thought it could have been our sorrow for our dead being kindly sorrow gives place to our minding of these returns of Prayer that in my sorrow I have so much leisure for consideration as to observe and say Tho God hath taken away my dear Relation for whom I prayed and therefore do sorrow yet he hath taken away my Sâ—n and taken â—own the power of it against which I prayed tâ—aâ— in my sorrow I might not sin and my sorrow shall not sâ— far blind me that I should not sâ—e what at my Prayers God hath done for me He hath taken my Relation from me but I have prayed he would not take away himself nor his quickning Spirit nor the sense of his Love and he hath not the Creature is gone from me but God continues with me the one I shall see no more in this World but God I often since have conversed with and he hath shewed his Love to me and such returns must quiet my Heart in the time of my grief and sorrow But turbulent sorrow not meerly natural but becoming Vitious and Exorbitant by the workings of Corrupt Nature stirred up by the grievousness of our Afflâ—ction hinders the exercise of Grace and blindâ— us that we cannot see nay makes us to deny that God doth hear our Prayers though he doth while our Affliction doâ—h remain Job 9.16 If I had called and he had answered me yet would I not believe that he had hearkened to my voice God takes a Mercy from you and yet he gives demonstrations of his Love unto you but in your turbulent sorrow you say You will not believe that God is reconciled to you you will not believe but his anger and displâ—asure is kindled and burns against you He heâ—rs your Prayers but you cannot see it and you will not believe it This is sorrow not of meer but of corrupt Nature Ans 5. In kindly sorrow for our dead there will be an hearkning to and a receiving of Alleviations of our sorrow propounded to us by men upon grounds of Reason and Religion Arguments for â—â—â—â—gating of our gâ—â—â—f from the Promises of God from the common case of all Men even most beloved of God that they have died as Abraham Isaac and Jacob Moses Aaron and Samuel the Prophets Apostles and all believing Primitive Christians and more still must From the happy state of those that die in the Lord the Evils they are delivered from the Good they are possessed of the Joys they are filled with the Holy Heavenly Work they are imployed in will find Entertainment with you and will be hearkened to and considered by you But turbulent Passions of corrupt Nature will put by all that tends to the asswaging of it after all Arguments from Reason and all Topicks from Religion will refuse to be comforted Thus Jacob's sorrow for Joseph when he supposed he was dead was too Exorbitant when all his Sons and all his Daughters rose up to comfort him and he refused to be comsorted When if they had not spoken one word of Comfort to him the very sight of so many Sons and Daughters living might have asswaged his sorrow for one supposed to be dead Gen. 37.33 34 35. So Rachel Jer. 31.15 A voice was heard in Ramah lamentation and bitter weeping Rachel weeping for her children refused to be comforted for her children because they were not Aâ—s 6. In kindly sorrow for our dead we shall be more ready to justifie God in his dealings with us and rather accuse our selves than him and say The Lord is righteous in his ways and holy in all his works I have sinned but he is just I am bad but he is good and though I think his Hand is heavy upon me yet he hath laid less upon me than mine Iâ—iquities have deserved Hath he laid my Relations in the Grave he might have lodged me in Hell Hath he denied longer Life to one I could have wished might have longer lived he might deny to me Eternal Life Hath he bereaved me of the Comforts of a Creature he might deny me all the Comforts of his Spirit Doth Natural Affection move me to mourn for my Loss so Natural Reason teacheth me that God herein hath done me no wrong because all is his own in that he is the Maker of all and the Light of Nature doth instruct me God might give or take away whatsoever is his own and I may not call him to an account saying to him What dost thou or why hast thou done so And whilst my sorrow is not yet risâ—n to be tuâ—bulent I have leisure to look what Scripture saith and to see what the light of Grace doth shew That
Moreover O my Soul wilt thou not grant that Sorrow is excessive which causeth thy Thoughts to run into the Grave and hinders them from ascending into Heaven and to have many self-piercing and self-tormenting Thoughts of thy dead for one serious and Heart-affecting Thought thou hast of the Living and Eternal God and which makes thy Heart as cold in all thy Duties unto God as the Body of thy dead Relation is in its Grave Besides is not thy Sorrow too much when it hinders thee from Spiritually rejoycing in God and giving Thanks to him for all the Mercies which in thy Sorrow thou dost overlook Especially when let thy Condition be what it will as to Temporals thou hast much more cause to bless God for Spiritual and Eternal Mercies than to grieve for the loss of Temporals Add to this O my Soul and then judge that thou grievest so much for thy Dead that thou hast left off sorrowing for the Miseries of the Church of God and losest much of thy little remaining Time wherein thou hast many Duties to perform many Graces to get and more degrees thereof many sins to mortifie and subdue many Temptations to resist a deceitful Heart to watch and search Children and Servants to instruct and teach and holy preparations to be made for Death and another Eternal World and while thou sorrowest all these are neglected Is it not too much By this time and from these Evidences O my Soul art thou not convinced that thy sorrow for thy dead hath been and still is excessive sorrow that thou hast and dost transgress the bounds of Christian Moderation and thereby offend thy holy Lord wrong thy self discredit that Religion thou dost profess discourage the good and cast a stumbling-block in the way of the ungodly and wilt thou still proceed herein Canst not thou sensibly feel the stroke of his hand and yet patiently submit unto his will How long wilt thou thus be cast down how long wilt thou thus be disquieted within me Is thy Relation fallen asleep and are thy Graces slumbering Is thy Faith as dead in thy Heart as thy Relation is in the Grave Shall Nature wôrk thus strongly in thee and Graces so feebly If natural Affections be exorbitant hath not God implanted Grace in thee that it may correct moderate and govern them Art thou only a Rational and not a Believing Soul Yea dost thou thus Immoderately grieve as if thou wast neither believing nor rational in thy sorrow If there be nothing in the common Book of corrupted Nature that thou canst read but what doth add grief unto thy grief yet is there not enough in that special Book of sacred Scripture that might turn thy sorrow into Joy for those of thine that sleep in Jesus Or hast thou thrown it by and neglected to look and search into it Or if thou readest dost thou understand what thou readest or dost thou consider what thou dost understand or believe with an unshaken Faith what thou dost consider whilest thy sorrow doth continue so excessive Hath not God revealed therein such certain Truths concerning the Bodies of those that dye in the Lord such glorious things concerning their separated Souls for the present such wonderful work that he will hereafter do in reuniting the same Souls with the same Bodies in raising them from the dead and Redeeming them from the Grave such desirable Glory that their Souls and Bodies thus reunited shall be joyntly partakers of and be made perfectly and eternally holy and happy in the enjoyment of the Father Son and eternal Spirit in the innumerable Company of glorious Angels and the vast multitudes of such as with them were chosen redeemed sanctified and shall be for ever saved singing triumphant Hallelujahs when they shall all be gathered together in the Immediate presence of their Lord and Saviour and be possessed of those Mansions in their Fathers House which were prepared for them Hath he made known such things as these and are they sure and infallibly certain and yet for want of Faith and Hope and Love dost thou sit here and sigh and sob and grieve and groan as thô those thou mournest for were for ever lost as if they were so dead that they should live no more or as if they were so fast bound in their Graves that they never should come forth nor be taken from that dark place to the Palace of glorious Light above Attend then O my Soul unto the Expression wherewith thy Lord doth represent the death of thy holy Relation now deceased as a sleeping in Jesus And if thou mournest because she is dead yet try if thou canst mourn because she sleepeth in the Lord. For this doth Sorrow fill thine Heart or mayest thou not rejoyce that being dead she so sleepeth for if she sleep in Jesus shall she not do well and if she shall do well shouldest thou not rather rejoyce than thus lament and grieve When didst thou sorrow when she went to bed and slept and took her natural Rest And now she sleeps in Jesus is she not at rest in her Grave as in her bed from all troubles from men from Sickness and Pain and from all Sense thereof from all worldly cares and piercing Sorrows that did usually accompany those cares and if her Death be but a Sleep how easie is it for Almighty Power to awaken her out of her Sleep And if she sleep she shall awake for if in the usual Course of Nature waking followeth after sleeping wherefore dost thou doubt or sear that Death being but a Sleep that it will be a perpetual Sleep And if she went sick and weary and weak to sleep when she shall awake shall she not be more refreshed and revived in the Morning of the Resurrection If the time of her sleeping seemeth long to thee now waking and not to her now sleeping why dost thou trouble thy self with that with which she is not at all concerned about If in the time of her Life thou sawest her sick and could not sleep this was a grief and trouble to thee would it not much more have added to thy sorrow to see her languish filled with pain hear her sigh and sob and groan upon a sick bed and could neither recover nor yet fall asleep and yet dost thou take on that when by all means used and learned carefull and pious Physicians consulted she could not be recovered that now she is fallen asleep Why dost thou molest and trouble thy self at the thoughts of the Length of her Sleep when it is no more trouble nor disquiet to her than the Length of time is to one that is fast sleeping in his Bed tho it may be tedious to one that sitteth by and waketh while he sleepeth Remember O my Soul and let the remembrance thereof asswage thy sorrow that it is her last but not an everlasting sleep tho it be long it shall not alwayes last and because it is a sleep that is called Death it shall