livelihood_n or_o from_o the_o other_o fear_v some_o such_o loss_n or_o first_o insure_v thirst_v for_o revenge_n will_v he_o commit_v a_o murder_n upon_o no_o cause_n take_v only_o with_o the_o murder_n who_o can_v imagine_v this_o for_o as_o for_o that_o furious_a and_o cruel_a catiline_n cruel_a catiline_n man_n that_o be_v say_v to_o be_v gratuito_fw-la malus_fw-la atque_fw-la crudelis_fw-la spontaneous_o wicked_a and_o bloodthirsty_a gratis_o yet_o be_v there_o a_o cause_n assign_v ne_fw-la per_fw-la otium_fw-la etc._n etc._n lâ—st_v his_o mind_n or_o hand_n through_o idleness_n shall_v grow_v useless_a and_o why_o indeed_o be_v he_o such_o but_o *_o that_o the_o city_n be_v surprise_v by_o his_o mischievous_a practice_n he_o may_v possess_v the_o honour_n wealth_n command_v thereof_o *_o that_o in_o so_o necessitous_a a_o fortune_n so_o guilty_a a_o conscience_n he_o may_v be_v free_a from_o fear_n of_o law_n and_o of_o want_n therefore_o be_v not_o catiline_n himself_o in_o love_n with_o his_o own_o villainy_n but_o with_o something_o else_o for_o which_o sake_n he_o do_v they_o chap._n vi_o but_o o_o my_o theft_n that_o wicked_a night-exploit_n of_o my_o sixteen_o year_n age_n what_o be_v it_o then_o that_o wretched_a i_o so_o much_o love_v in_o thou_o for_o nothing_o fair_a thou_o be_v because_o thou_o be_v theft_n or_o indeed_o be_v thou_o at_o all_o any_o thing_n that_o thus_o i_o speak_v unto_o thou_o indeed_o the_o fruit_n we_o rob_v be_v fair_a because_o it_o be_v thy_o creature_n thou_o fair_o of_o all_o creator_n of_o all_o my_o good_a god_n god_n my_o true_a and_o my_o supreme_a good_a fair_a be_v the_o fruit_n but_o that_o be_v not_o it_o after_o which_o my_o miserable_a soul_n lust_v have_v thereof_o far_o better_a in_o great_a plenty_n of_o our_o own_o but_o the_o other_o rather_o i_o like_v because_o so_o i_o may_v steal_v it_o which_o be_v once_o gather_v as_o have_v now_o sufficient_o satisfy_v my_o appetite_n i_o throw_v it_o away_o enjoy_v thereof_o only_o the_o pleasure_n of_o the_o sin_n or_o if_o i_o chance_v to_o taste_v any_o of_o the_o fruit_n that_o which_o sweeten_v it_o unto_o i_o be_v the_o offence_n and_o now_o o_o lord_n my_o god_n fain_o will_v i_o know_v what_o it_o be_v in_o this_o fault_n that_o so_o much_o delight_v i_o and_o behold_v i_o can_v find_v the_o least_o allurance_n of_o any_o beauty_n in_o it_o i_o do_v not_o mean_v such_o beauty_n as_o be_v see_v in_o the_o divine_a habit_n of_o justice_n and_o prudence_n or_o as_o in_o the_o high_a faculty_n of_o understanding_n and_o memory_n or_o as_o in_o the_o subtlety_n of_o the_o sense_n or_o yet_o in_o the_o vigour_n of_o vegetation_n nor_o yet_o inferior_a to_o these_o as_o the_o star_n be_v glorious_a and_o orderly_a in_o their_o orb_n or_o as_o the_o earth_n and_o sea_n be_v beautiful_a in_o their_o kind_n be_v always_o lade_v with_o breed_n a_o new_a growth_n of_o which_o in_o their_o unexhausted_a womb_n still_o succeed_v a_o former_a depart_v but_o i_o mean_v such_o a_o gloss_n at_o least_o as_o there_o be_v a_o faint_a and_o paint_a one_o in_o many_o a_o delude_a vice_n for_o both_o *_o the_n sin_n of_o pride_n to_o be_v some_o way_n like_o unto_o thou_o emulate_v highness_n when_o as_o thou_o be_v only_o above_o all_o the_o most_o high_a god_n and_o *_o ambition_n aim_v at_o glory_n and_o honour_n when_o as_o thou_o alone_o be_v honourable_a supreme_o and_o eternal_o glorious_a and_o *_o the_o cruelty_n of_o the_o great_a one_o desire_n so_o to_o become_v reverence_v and_o fear_v and_o who_o be_v to_o be_v fear_v but_o god_n alone_o from_o who_o power_n what_o 76.7_o psal_n 76.7_o or_o when_o or_o where_o or_o how_o or_o by_o who_o can_v ever_o any_o thing_n by_o force_n or_o fraud_n be_v subduct_v and_o *_o the_o caress_n of_o the_o lascivious_a seek_v to_o be_v love_v when_o as_o neither_o be_v any_o thing_n so_o dear_o sweet_a as_o thy_o love_n nor_o so_o save_o enamour_v as_o thy_o above-all-beautifull_a and_o enlighten_v truth_n and_o *_o curiosity_n make_v semblance_n of_o a_o desire_n of_o knowledge_n when_o as_o it_o be_v thou_o that_o perfect_o understand_v all_o thing_n also_o even_o *_o ignorance_n and_o folly_n clothes_n itself_o with_o the_o name_n of_o simplicity_n and_o innocency_n because_o not_o any_o thing_n be_v find_v like_o simple_a as_o thyself_o and_o what_o be_v there_o innocent_a like_o thou_o who_o work_n be_v harmful_a only_o to_o the_o sinner_n and_o *_o sloth_n affect_v as_o it_o be_v quiet_a but_o what_o repose_v certain_a beside_o the_o lord_n *_o luxury_n desire_n to_o be_v call_v satiety_n and_o plenty_n yet_o thou_o be_v the_o only_a fullness_n and_o never-failing_a abundance_n of_o uncorrupt_v dainty_n *_o lavish_v hide_n itself_o under_o the_o shadow_n of_o liberality_n but_o the_o most_o royal_o overflow_a donor_n of_o all_o good_a thing_n be_v thyself_o *_o avarice_n will_v have_v much_o to_o be_v in_o its_o fruition_n and_o it_o be_v thou_o that_o possesse_v all_o thing_n *_o envy_v contend_v for_o pre-eminence_n and_o what_o be_v so_o pre-excellent_a as_o thyself_o *_o anger_v pretend_v just_a vengeance_n and_o who_o execute_v it_o righteous_o like_o thou_o *_o fear_v abhor_v thing_n unusual_a surprise_v and_o enemy_n to_o what_o she_o love_v whilst_o she_o be_v always_o precautelous_a of_o her_o safety_n now_o to_o thou_o only_o it_o be_v that_o nothing_o come_v unacquainted_a or_o sudden_a and_o who_o can_v part_v what_o thou_o love_v from_o thou_o and_o where_o but_o with_o thou_o ever_o dwell_v unshaken_a security_n *_o sorrow_n pine_v for_o those_o thing_n lose_v in_o who_o enjoyment_n she_o delight_v because_o she_o desire_v that_o nothing_o may_v be_v take_v away_o from_o she_o as_o nothing_o can_v from_o thou_o after_o these_o the_o soul_n go_v a_o whore_v when_o she_o be_v depart_v from_o thou_o and_o seek_v beside_o thou_o what_o she_o never_o find_v pure_a and_o clear_a but_o when_o return_v unto_o thou_o and_o yet_o all_o they_o in_o a_o wrong_a way_n imitate_v and_o seek_v likeness_n unto_o they_z who_o render_v themselves_o far_o from_o thou_o and_o who_o pride_n themselves_o must_v against_o thou_o and_o in_o this_o their_o imitate_v and_o resemble_v thou_o show_v thou_o to_o be_v the_o creator_n of_o all_o nature_n and_o that_o in_o it_o they_o can_v any-whith_a recede_v from_o thou_o what_o therefore_o in_o that_o theft_n be_v it_o that_o i_o love_v and_o in_o what_o here_o though_o vicious_o and_o perverse_o have_v i_o also_o imitate_v my_o lord_n be_v it_o that_o i_o have_v a_o desire_n to_o act_v against_o the_o law_n by_o sleight_n where_o i_o can_v not_o by_o power_n and_o though_o restrain_v by_o it_o yet_o will_v imitate_v a_o lame_a kind_n of_o liberty_n in_o do_v free_a from_o punishment_n what_o i_o can_v not_o free_a from_o guilt_n out_o of_o a_o fond_a resemblance_n of_o thy_o omnipotency_n chap_n vii_o he_o lament_v his_o offence_n and_o praise_v god_n for_o the_o remission_n thereof_o by_o baptism_n see_v if_o this_o be_v a_o good_a servant_n thus_o fly_v from_o his_o lord_n and_o embrace_v a_o shadow_n of_o he_o o_o corruption_n monstrosity_n of_o life_n profoundness_n of_o death_n can_v i_o then_o lust_n after_o what_o be_v unlawful_a for_o no_o other_o reason_n but_o because_o unlawful_a 116.12_o psal_n 116.12_o what_o shall_v i_o render_v unto_o the_o lord_n that_o whilst_o my_o memory_n now_o recall_v these_o thing_n my_o soul_n do_v not_o dread_v they_o i_o will_v love_v thou_o o_o lord_n my_o god_n and_o give_v thanks_o unto_o thou_o and_o confess_v unto_o thy_o name_n because_o thou_o have_v forgive_v my_o so_o great_a iniquity_n and_o detestable_a deed_n to_o thy_o grace_n i_o depute_v it_o 9.2_o psal_n 9.2_o and_o to_o thy_o mercy_n that_o those_o sin_n i_o commit_v be_v now_o dissolve_v like_o ice_n and_o to_o thy_o grace_n i_o depute_v it_o also_o whatsoever_o other_o sin_n i_o have_v not_o commit_v for_o what_o one_o crime_n will_v i_o not_o have_v act_v who_o love_v such_o a_o act_n for_o its_o be_v criminous_a therefore_o *_o of_o all_o these_o sin_n baptism_n sin_n be_v sin_n commit_v before_o his_o baptism_n i_o confess_v myself_o release_v by_o thou_o not_o only_o *_o of_o those_o by_o my_o own_o wilfulness_n effect_v but_o *_o of_o those_o by_o thy_o guidance_n avoid_v and_o who_o be_v he_o that_o well-weighing_a his_o frailty_n dare_v to_o attribute_v his_o chastity_n or_o his_o innocence_n to_o his_o own_o ability_n that_o so_o he_o shall_v less_o love_v thou_o as_o less_o oblige_v to_o that_o thy_o mercy_n by_o which_o thou_o remitte_v sin_n to_o those_o who_o return_v unto_o thou_o and_o whoever_o he_o be_v that_o call_v by_o he_o have_v straight_o follow_v thy_o voice_n and_o have_v happy_o escape_v
enlighten_v my_o darkness_n chap._n ii_o chap._n iii_o still_o unsatisfied_a concern_v the_o cause_n of_o evil_a and_o why_o angel_n and_o man_n be_v create_v by_o the_o most_o good_a god_n there_o shall_v by_o he_o be_v place_v in_o they_o a_o power_n to_o will_v evil_o but_o although_o i_o thus_o grant_v thou_o uncontaminable_a and_o unalterable_a or_o liable_a to_o misery_n in_o any_o part_n or_o member_n of_o thou_o from_o the_o manichean-feigned_n opposition_n of_o i_o know_v not_o what_o gens_n tenebrarum_fw-la or_o adverse_a malignant_a power_n arise_v out_o of_o another_o lump_n of_o matter_n contrary_a to_o that_o which_o thou_o have_v make_v which_o can_v it_o any_o way_n have_v hurt_v thou_o thou_o must_v then_o the_o very_a name_n of_o which_o all_o abhor_v have_v be_v suppose_v both_o violable_a and_o corruptible_a as_o be_v well_o press_v by_o nebridius_fw-la long_a since_o at_o carthage_n and_o have_v then_o much_o startle_v we_o that_o hear_v it_o and_o although_o i_o also_o firm_o acknowledge_v thou_o our_o lord_n the_o true_a god_n that_o make_v not_o only_o our_o soul_n principle_n soul_n whereas_o the_o manichee_n suppose_v the_o body_n produce_v by_o another_o evil_a principle_n but_o body_n but_o all_o *_o of_o we_o and_o *_o of_o all_o thing_n notwithstanding_o as_o yet_o i_o apprehend_v not_o clear_o and_o free_a from_o scruple_n the_o cause_n of_o evil._n yet_o whatever_o it_o be_v such_o i_o see_v it_o must_v necessary_o be_v as_o may_v no_o way_n oblige_v i_o to_o believe_v *_o thou_o the_o immutable_a god_n to_o be_v subject_a to_o change_v nor_o *_o thy_o substance_n to_o suffer_v evil_a rather_o than_o we_o to_o do_v any_o evil_n lest_o so_o myself_o shall_v become_v that_o i_o seek_v for_o and_o i_o strain_v hard_a to_o see_v and_o discern_v what_o i_o have_v hear_v that_o our_o own_o freewill_n be_v the_o cause_n that_o we_o do_v evil_a and_o thy_o righteous_a judgement_n that_o we_o suffer_v it_o but_o i_o be_v not_o yet_o able_a to_o behold_v this_o clear_o but_o as_o i_o endeavour_v to_o raise_v up_o the_o eye_n of_o my_o soul_n above_o these_o deep_a water_n i_o present_o sink_v again_o and_o often_o endeavour_v it_o i_o sink_v down_o again_o and_o again_o on_o the_o one_o side_n this_o elevate_a and_o buoy_v i_o up_o towards_o thy_o light_n that_o already_o i_o know_v as_o well_o myself_o to_o have_v a_o will_n as_o to_o live_v therefore_o in_o willing_a or_o nilling_a any_o thing_n i_o be_v most_o certain_a no_o other_o thing_n but_o i_o to_o will_n and_o will_v it_o and_o i_o quick_o observe_v also_o that_o the_o cause_n of_o my_o sin_n be_v there_o again_o whatever_o i_o do_v unwilling_o and_o with_o regret_n i_o see_v myself_o to_o suffer_v rather_o such_o evil_a than_o to_o do_v it_o and_o judge_v it_o to_o be_v not_o my_o fault_n but_o punishment_n which_o also_o i_o apprehend_v thou_o as_o just_a soon_o confess_v not_o to_o be_v unjust_o inflict_v but_o then_o i_o argue_v and_o who_o make_v i_o do_v not_o my_o god_n not_o only_o good_a but_o goodness_n itself_o from_o who_o have_v i_o then_o to_o will_v evil_o and_o to_o will_v well_o that_o so_o there_o may_v be_v that_o for_o what_o i_o may_v be_v just_o punish_v who_o put_v this_o thing_n into_o i_o who_o plant_v in_o i_o this_o root_n of_o bitterness_n all_o of_o i_o be_v make_v by_o the_o most_o sweet_a creator_n if_o the_o devil_n the_o author_n of_o it_o whence_o then_o the_o devil_n but_o if_o he_o also_o by_o a_o perverse_a will_n of_o a_o good_a angel_n become_v a_o devil_n whence_o come_v in_o he_o this_o evil_a will_n by_o which_o he_o become_v such_o since_o he_o total_o be_v make_v by_o the_o best_a god_n a_o good_a angel_n and_o by_o these_o thought_n be_v i_o plunge_v again_o and_o suffocate_v yet_o not_o so_o low_a as_o that_o infernal_a error_n to_o believe_v that_o thou_o rather_o do_v force_o suffer_v than_o man_n do_v evil_a chap._n iu._n chap._n v._n pursue_v the_o same_o query_n still_o unde_fw-la malum_fw-la yet_o *_o his_o faith_n of_o christ_n to_o be_v our_o lord_n and_o saviour_n remain_v in_o he_o firm_a and_o unshaken_a and_o i_o seek_v from_o whence_o evil_a may_v come_v and_o i_o seek_v evil_o yet_o see_v not_o this_o evil_a in_o my_o inquisition_n and_o my_o spirit_n place_v before_o it_o the_o whole_a universe_n both_o of_o visibles_fw-fr as_o the_o earth_n sea_n air_n starrs_n plant_n animal_n etc._n etc._n and_o of_o invisibles_fw-fr as_o the_o firmament_n of_o heaven_n and_o all_o the_o angel_n and_o spiritual_a inhabitant_n thereof_o after_o this_o i_o consider_v thou_o my_o god_n as_o every_o way_n infinite_a and_o boundless_a environ_v and_o entire_o penetrate_v this_o mass_n as_o a_o shoarless_a sea_n will_v fill_v a_o sponge_n of_o a_o great_a but_o finite_a magnitude_n place_v within_o it_o so_o conceive_v i_o the_o finite_a creature_n fill_v with_o thou_o the_o infinite_a god_n and_o i_o say_v within_o myself_o behold_v god_n and_o behold_v all_o the_o thing_n god_n have_v create_v o_o how_o good_a be_v he_o and_o most_o perfect_o and_o incomparable_o more_o excellent_a and_o better_a than_o they_o yet_o be_v good_a he_o create_v these_o good_a and_o behold_v how_o he_o outward_o encircle_v and_o within_z replenish_v all_o his_o creation_n where_o then_o be_v evil_a or_o whence_o or_o what_o way_n have_v it_o steal_v in_o hither_o what_o be_v the_o root_n and_o what_o the_o seed_n of_o it_o or_o indeed_o be_v it_o at_o all_o why_o fear_v we_o then_o and_o why_o avoid_v we_o that_o which_o be_v not_o or_o if_o we_o vain_o fear_v sure_o this_o fear_n itself_o be_v a_o evil_a by_o which_o our_o soul_n be_v needless_o prick_v and_o torture_v therefore_o either_o there_o be_v a_o evil_n which_o we_o fear_v or_o this_o that_o we_o shall_v so_o fear_v be_v a_o evil_a whence_o be_v it_o then_o because_o god_n make_v all_o these_o thing_n the_o good_a god_n all_o thing_n good_a he_o the_o great_a and_o the_o supreme_a good_a make_v these_o the_o lesser_a but_o yet_o both_o the_o create_v and_o the_o create_v all_o be_v good_a from_o whence_o then_o be_v evil_a or_o out_o of_o what_o do_v god_n make_v these_o thing_n be_v there_o some_o preexistent_a matter_n which_o be_v bad_a and_o he_o form_v and_o rectify_v this_o but_o so_o that_o he_o leave_v something_o in_o it_o not_o convert_v into_o good_a but_o why_o this_o then_o be_v he_o impotent_a to_o change_v it_o all_o that_o so_o no_o more_o evil_a shall_v remain_v in_o it_o who_o yet_o be_v omnipotent_a last_o why_o will_v he_o make_v any_o thing_n at_o all_o of_o it_o and_o not_o rather_o by_o the_o same_o omnipotence_n annihilate_v it_o and_o prepare_v another_o matter_n total_o good_a out_o of_o which_o he_o may_v produce_v all_o thing_n for_o he_o be_v not_o omnipotent_a if_o he_o can_v not_o make_v any_o good_a unless_o he_o be_v first_o furnish_v with_o some_o matter_n which_o himself_o have_v not_o make_v such_o thing_n i_o agitate_a in_o my_o perplex_a breast_n load_v with_o corrode_a care_n from_o fear_n of_o death_n and_o not_o find_v out_o the_o truth_n yet_o the_o faith_n concern_v christ_n both_o our_o lord_n and_o our_o saviour_n retain_v in_o the_o church_n catholic_n be_v irremovable_o fix_v in_o my_o heart_n in_o many_o thing_n indeed_o yet_o unformed_a and_o float_v beside_o the_o rule_n of_o sound_a doctrine_n but_o my_o mind_n do_v never_o forsake_v it_o yea_o daily_o more_o and_o more_o seek_v to_o embrace_v it_o chap._n vi_o and_o *_o the_o lie_a divination_n of_o astrologer_n foretell_v from_o the_o star_n future_a event_n no_o way_n credit_v by_o he_o already_o also_o i_o have_v cast_v off_o the_o lie_a divination_n and_o impious_a dotage_n of_o the_o astrologer_n vulg_n psal_n 106.8_o vulg_n and_o for_o this_o also_o let_v i_o confess_v unto_o thou_o from_o the_o bottom_n of_o my_o soul_n thy_o compassion_n o_o my_o god_n for_o it_o be_v thou_o thou_o alone_o for_o who_o else_o recal_v we_o from_o the_o death_n of_o any_o error_n but_o the_o life_n never_o die_a and_o the_o wisdom_n illuminate_v our_o needy_a mind_n need_v no_o illumination_n itself_o by_o which_o the_o whole_a world_n be_v orderly_o administer_v even_o to_o the_o wind-scattered_n leave_v of_o tree_n it_o be_v thou_o that_o procure_v for_o the_o remedy_n of_o my_o obstinacy_n 3._o obstinacy_n see_v l._n 4._o c._n 3._o which_o oppose_v both_o vendicianus_n a_o acute_a old_a man_n and_o nebridius_fw-la a_o youth_n of_o a_o excellent_a spirit_n the_o one_o vehement_o affirm_v the_o other_o somewhat_o doubtful_o yet_o often_o repeat_v that_o there_o be_v no_o art_n at_o all_o of_o foresee_v or_o divine_a thing_n future_a but_o that_o man_n conjecture_n have_v many_o time_n a_o
good_a time_n thou_o will_v return_v and_o pity_v i_o and_o what_o be_v it_o i_o will_v first_o utter_v unto_o thou_o o_o lord_n my_o god_n but_o that_o my_o silliness_n can_v tell_v how_o or_o whence_o i_o first_o come_v hither_o into_o this_o die_a life_n shall_v i_o call_v it_o or_o live_a death_n i_o can_v tell_v and_o behold_v then_o immediate_o the_o comfort_n of_o thy_o compassionate_v mercy_n *_o attend_v i_o as_o i_o have_v be_v tell_v by_o the_o parent_n of_o my_o flesh_n out_o of_o who_o substance_n thou_o fashion_v i_o in_o thy_o good_a appoint_a time_n long_o before_o the_o dawn_n of_o this_o my_o memory_n and_o *_o cherish_v that_o my_o helpless_a age_n with_o the_o soft_a nourishment_n of_o a_o woman_n milk_n neither_o be_v it_o the_o providence_n of_o my_o mother_n or_o nurse_n that_o store_v their_o swell_a breast_n therewith_o but_o thou_o it_o be_v that_o in_o those_o cistern_n prepare_v a_o agreeable_a food_n for_o that_o my_o tender_a age_n according_a to_o thinâ—_n ordinance_n and_o the_o riches_n of_o thy_o bounty_n descend_v to_o the_o mean_a original_a of_o thing_n and_o thou_o give_v also_o *_o to_o i_o to_o desire_v that_o only_a which_o thou_o then_o give_v i_o and_o also_o *_o to_o those_o who_o nurse_v i_o as_o willing_o to_o bestow_v on_o i_o what_o thou_o do_v first_o bestow_v on_o they_o for_o they_o by_o a_o heavenly-guided_n affection_n take_v a_o delight_n to_o impart_v unto_o i_o what_o they_o abound_v with_o from_o thou_o and_o it_o be_v also_o good_a for_o they_o that_o i_o receive_v this_o good_a from_o they_o which_o indeed_o be_v not_o from_o but_o by_o they_o only_o for_o from_o thou_o o_o god_n be_v all_o good_a thing_n 62.1_o psal_n 62.1_o and_o from_o my_o god_n come_v my_o universal_a salvation_n as_o i_o have_v well-learned_a since_o by_o the_o multiply_a expression_n of_o so_o many_o blessing_n heap_v upon_o i_o internal_a and_o external_a all_o confess_v thou_o their_o author_n for_o then_o i_o have_v only_o the_o skill_n how_o to_o suck_v to_o be_v still_o when_o my_o flesh_n be_v satisfy_v and_o to_o cry_v when_o it_o be_v offend_v and_o nothing_o more_o than_o this_o but_o afterward_o came-on_a smile_n and_o laughter_n first_o when_o i_o be_v asleep_a then_o when_o awake_a for_o this_o have_v be_v tell_v i_o of_o myself_o and_o i_o likewise_o discover_v it_o in_o the_o infancy_n of_o other_o though_o i_o remember_v it_o not_o in_o my_o own_o hence_o by_o gentle_a degree_n i_o advance_v to_o perceive_v and_o discern_v where_o i_o be_v and_o to_o have_v a_o desire_n to_o make_v know_v my_o desire_n to_o those_o that_o may_v content_v they_o but_o this_o in_o vain_a at_o first_o these_o long_n of_o my_o be_v *_o shut_v up_o within_o i_o and_o they_o *_o without_o i_o unable_a with_o the_o eye_n of_o sense_n to_o pierce_v so_o deep_a into_o my_o soul_n therefore_o next_o i_o labour_v to_o produce_v and_o expose_v my_o meaning_n by_o several_a motion_n of_o my_o flutter_a limb_n and_o ejaculation_n of_o break_a word_n *_o some_o few_o such_o as_o i_o can_v articulate_v and_o bear_v *_o little_a resemblance_n to_o my_o mental_a conceit_n and_o when_o i_o be_v not_o present_o obey_v either_o for_o that_o my_o desire_n be_v hurtful_a or_o not_o intelligible_a i_o will_v fall_v into_o a_o ridiculous_a rage_n against_o my_o elder_n not_o under_o my_o power_n and_o my_o better_n not_o owe_v i_o service_n i_o will_v take_v revenge_n on_o they_o with_o cry_v such_o have_v i_o hear_v other_o in_o aunt_n to_o be_v and_o such_o my_o nurse_n and_o tender_v report_v i_o to_o have_v be_v by_o those_o dark_a conjecture_n they_o can_v make_v of_o my_o infantine_a inclination_n and_o now_o behold_v my_o infancy_n be_v decease_v long_o ago_o and_o notwithstanding_o i_o still_o alive_a but_o tell_v i_o o_o lord_n thou_o who_o live_v all_o age_n yet_o without_o the_o defluxe_n of_o any_o because_o before_o the_o first_o dawn_n of_o time_n and_o before_o all_o that_o can_v be_v say_v to_o be_v before_z thou_o be_v and_o be_v the_o god_n and_o lord_n of_o all_o which_o thyself_o have_v create_v and_o before_o thy_o eye_n do_v stand_v ever-fixed_a the_o cause_n of_o all_o the_o heremost-fleeting_a event_n and_o remain_v unchangeable_a the_o idea_n and_o pattern_n of_o all_o thing_n here_o most_o float_v and_o before_o thou_o live_v eternal_a the_o reason_n of_o all_o thing_n temporal_a which_o so_o often_o to_o we_o seem_v unreasonable_a tell_v unto_o i_o o_o god_n thy_o poor_a suppliant_a thou_o that_o be_v merciful_a unto_o i_o who_o be_o miserable_a tell_v i_o whether_o this_o my_o infancy_n succeed_v not_o also_o a_o young_a age_n of_o i_o expire_v before_o it_o that_o life_n perchance_o the_o revolution_n of_o which_o i_o pass_v yet_o be_v a_o prisoner_n within_o my_o mother_n womb_n for_o of_o my_o abode_n there_o also_o i_o have_v understand_v and_o see_v many_o woman_n bear_v about_o the_o like_a burden_n and_o what_o before_o that_o life_n again_o o_o my_o god_n my_o sweet_a dear_a delight_n be_v i_o yet_o then_o also_o any_o where_n or_o any_o thing_n which_o none_o can_v tell_v i_o neither_o father_n nor_o mother_n that_o beget_v i_o neither_o other_o experience_n nor_o my_o own_o memory_n and_o do_v not_o thou_o now_o deride_v this_o my_o curiousity_n demand_v thou_o such_o question_n who_o only_o require_v my_o laud_v of_o thou_o and_o confess_v unto_o thou_o concern_v thing_n within_o the_o circle_n of_o my_o knowledge_n i_o confess_v therefore_o unto_o thou_o lord_n of_o heaven_n and_o earth_n and_o give_v thou_o praiâ—e_v for_o that_o my_o first_o conception_n and_o that_o my_o newborn_a infancy_n in_o which_o thing_n though_o beyond_o our_o remembrance_n thou_o have_v give_v unto_o we_o a_o conjecture_n of_o ourselves_o from_o our_o experience_n of_o other_o and_o from_o the_o authority_n of_o those_o who_o then_o attend_v we_o then_o have_v i_o be_v and_o life_n and_o cogitation_n and_o towards_o the_o wane_n of_o my_o infancy_n invention_n of_o expressive_a sign_n to_o make_v my_o meaning_n know_v to_o other_o and_o whence_o such_o a_o vital_a sensitive_a piece_n of_o matter_n as_o i_o be_v then_o but_o from_o thou_o o_o lord_n can_v any_o be_v his_o own_o creator_n or_o can_v there_o be_v derive_v from_o any_o other_o source_n the_o small_a vein_n 100.2_o psal_n 100.2_o that_o may_v stream_n essence_n and_o life_n into_o we_o but_o only_o from_o thou_o who_o thus_o have_v make_v we_o in_o who_o be_v and_o live_v be_v not_o a_o several_a thing_n but_o thou_o be_v one_o and_o the_o same_o high_a supremity_n of_o both_o for_o 102.26_o ps._n 83.18_o psal_n 102.26_o thou_o be_v the_o most-high_a and_o thou_o be_v not_o change_v neither_o do_v today_n ever_o passeaway_a in_o thou_o and_o yet_o in_o thou_o it_o be_v that_o it_o pass_v away_o for_o even_o these_o transitory_n be_v not_o but_o as_o in_o thou_o nor_o have_v they_o any_o way_n of_o pass_v away_o but_o as_o convey_v through_o thou_o and_o yet_o mean_a while_n 102.26_o psal_n 102.26_o because_o thy_o year_n fail_v not_o therefore_o thy_o year_n be_v but_o a_o continue_a today_n and_o how_o many_o day_n of_o we_o and_o of_o our_o forefather_n have_v flow_v away_o through_o this_o thy_o one_o ever-fixed_a day_n and_o from_o it_o receive_v the_o mould_n and_o fashion_n of_o their_o be_v and_o how_o many_o more_o yet_o shall_v flow_v and_o shall_v so_o receive_v the_o measure_n of_o their_o be_v whilst_o thou_o be_v still_o the_o same_o and_o all_o the_o thing_n of_o tomorrow_n 102.26_o psal_n 102.26_o and_o what_o ever_o be_v beyond_o it_o and_o all_o the_o thing_n of_o yesterday_o and_o whatever_o be_v behind_o it_o in_o this_o thy_o day_n thou_o shall_v make_v and_o in_o this_o thy_o day_n thou_o have_v make_v they_o what_o do_v it_o import_v i_o if_o any_o understand_v not_o this_o let_v such_o a_o one_o praise_v thou_o in_o say_v what_o mean_v this_o high_a mystery_n even_o so_o let_v he_o praise_v thou_o and_o rather_o choose_v in_o not_o apprehend_v to_o conceive_v nothing_o but_o right_a of_o thou_o incomprehensible_a thou_o that_o be_v that_o thou_o be_v incomprehensible_a than_o in_o apprehend_v amiss_o to_o conceive_v something_o below_o thou_o chap_n vii_o and*_n of_o its_o sin_n and_o his_o praise_a god_n for_o its_o good_a endowment_n hear_v o_o god_n wo_n wo_n unto_o the_o sin_n of_o man_n and_o man_n confess_v this_o thou_o take_v compassion_n of_o he_o because_o thou_o have_v make_v he_o but_o yet_o make_v not_o sin_n in_o he_o o_o who_o can_v recount_v unto_o i_o the_o conceal_a sin_n of_o my_o unknown_a infancy_n from_o which_o none_o be_v pure_a in_o thy_o sight_n o_o lord_n not_o the_o child_n that_o be_v a_o day_n old_a 25._o
straight_o they_o decrease_v again_o and_o wither_v for_o all_o of_o they_o have_v their_o decadency_n and_o fade_v they_o do_v all_o therefore_o also_o when_o they_o spring_v and_o blossom_n towards_o a_o be_v look_v how_o much_o more_o speedy_o they_o advance_v to_o be_v the_o more_o precipitancy_n again_o they_o make_v not_o to_o be_v such_o their_o condition_n and_o such_o a_o lot_n have_v thou_o bequeath_v they_o because_o they_o be_v parcel_n of_o thing_n which_o be_v not_o consistent_a all_o together_o but_o which_o by_o some_o still_a retire_n and_o other_o come_v on_o all_o of_o they_o successive_o build_v up_o that_o fleet_a universe_n of_o which_o they_o be_v parcel_n in_o the_o same_o manner_n as_o our_o speech_n be_v compose_v of_o many_o significant_a sound_n and_o can_v be_v perfect_v unless_o each_o word_n thereof_o give_v way_n and_o vanish_v when_o it_o have_v sound_v its_o part_n that_o another_o may_v succeed_v it_o from_o all_o these_o creature_n o_o god_n let_v my_o soul_n raise_v praise_n unto_o thou_o the_o creator_n of_o they_o all_o but_o never_o let_v my_o corporeal_a sense_n fasten_v i_o unto_o they_o with_o the_o glue_v of_o love_n for_o they_o go_v whither_o they_o always_o do_v go_v hasty_o towards_o a_o not-being_a and_o then_o wound_n and_o rack_v the_o soul_n with_o most_o pestilent_a long_n because_o she_o will_v fain_o be_v nothing_o but_o what_o they_o be_v and_o love_v to_o set_v up_o her_o final_a rest_n in_o the_o thing_n she_o love_v and_o in_o they_o there_o be_v no_o place_n of_o repose_n for_o they_o stay_v not_o but_o pass_v away_o and_o who_o can_v with_o the_o sense_n of_o this_o flesh_n either_o pursue_v they_o when_o go_v or_o comprehend_v they_o when_o at_o hand_n for_o the_o fleshly_a sense_n be_v slow-paced_a because_o it_o be_v but_o the_o sense_n of_o flesh_n and_o this_o be_v the_o condition_n of_o it_o and_o sufficient_a it_o be_v for_o those_o end_n for_o which_o it_o be_v make_v but_o for_o this_o it_o serve_v not_o to_o detain_v and_o stay_v thing_n here_o run_v their_o prescribe_a race_n and_o haste_v from_o their_o beginning_n appoint_v to_o their_o appoint_a period_n for_o in_o thy_o word_n by_o which_o they_o be_v create_v there_o they_o all_o hear_v their_o sentence_n hinc_fw-la &_o huc_fw-la usque_fw-la hence_o and_o hitherto_o chap._n xi_o the_o transition_n of_o its_o part_n be_v necessary_a to_o make_v this_o universe_n complete_a be_v no_o more_o so_o vain_a o_o my_o soul_n nor_o suffer_v the_o tumultuous_a noise_n of_o thy_o busy_a vanity_n to_o deafen_v the_o ear_n of_o thy_o heart_n harken_v thou_o also_o unto_o the_o word_n for_o it_o speak_v unto_o thou_o to_o return_v back_o from_o these_o unto_o it_o and_o that_o there_o be_v the_o seat_n of_o un-molested_n quiet_a where_o thy_o love_n shall_v never_o if_o it_o forsake_v not_o be_v forsake_v behold_v those_o other_o thing_n be_v always_o depart_v that_o other_o thing_n yet_o may_v succeed_v and_o this_o low_a fleet_a globe_n be_v complete_v with_o all_o its_o part_n but_o do_v i_o any_o where_o depart_n say_v the_o word_n of_o god_n 40.8_o isa_n 40.8_o there_o then_o fix_v thy_o abode_n thither_o devote_v all_o that_o thou_o have_v from_o thence_o receive_v o_o my_o soul_n at_o least_o now_o after_o thou_o have_v be_v outwearied_n with_o imposture_n recommend_v over_o unto_o truth_n what_o have_v be_v impart_v to_o thou_o from_o she_o and_o thou_o shall_v so_o not_o suffer_v loss_n yea_o thy_o decay_n shall_v enjoy_v a_o fresh_a spring_n and_o thy_o languor_n be_v restore_v the_o continual_a flux_n of_o thy_o material_n shall_v be_v renovate_v and_o refashioned_n and_o make_v permanent_a with_o thou_o nor_o shall_v they_o sway_v thou_o down_o also_o whether_o they_o now_o descend_v but_o stand_v with_o thou_o and_o abide_v for_o ever_o before_o god_n who_o abide_v and_o stand_v fast_o for_o ever_o to_o what_o end_n therefore_o do_v thou_o so_o erroneous_o pursue_v the_o inclination_n of_o thy_o pervert_n flesh_n rather_o now_o let_v it_o convert_v follow_v after_o thou_o for_o whatever_o thou_o discerne_v by_o it_o be_v only_o a_o part_n of_o the_o successive_a universe_n and_o the_o whole_a be_v yet_o unknown_a by_o thou_o whereof_o these_o be_v part_n and_o yet_o so_o little_a a_o part_n of_o it_o delight_v thou_o but_o have_v thy_o carnal_a sense_n any_o capacity_n of_o comprehend_v the_o whole_a and_o have_v it_o not_o for_o thy_o punishment_n by_o reason_n of_o its_o mortality_n be_v confine_v to_o the_o prospect_n only_o of_o a_o small_a part_n thereof_o thou_o will_v have_v wish_v a_o speedy_a transition_n of_o these_o part_n which_o for_o the_o present_a exist_v that_o from_o the_o whole_a perfect_v thou_o may_v have_v receive_v a_o supreme_a content_n for_o by_o the_o same_o carnal_a sense_n also_o thou_o hear_v what_o we_o speak_v yet_o will_v thou_o not_o have_v one_o syllable_n still_o to_o sound_v before_o thou_o but_o sly_a away_o by_o thou_o and_o other_o come_v till_o thou_o may_v hear_v the_o whole_a even_o so_o be_v some_o of_o they_o ever_o in_o be_v which_o make_v up_o one_o whole_a yet_o be_v they_o never_o all_o together_o of_o which_o that_o whole_a be_v make_v and_o these_o will_v please_v more_o all_o together_o than_o the_o several_a piece_n can_v they_o be_v all_o at_o once_o survey_v by_o thou_o yet_o far_o better_a than_o all_o these_o sum_v together_o be_v he_o who_o make_v they_o all_o and_o this_o be_v our_o god_n and_o he_o have_v no_o transition_n because_o he_o have_v no_o succession_n if_o body_n therefore_o attract_v thy_o affection_n let_v thy_o praise_n from_o they_o ascend_v unto_o god_n and_o thy_o love_n wheel_n about_o unto_o their_o maker_n lest_o in_o those_o thing_n which_o please_v thou_o thou_o displease_v he_o chap._n xii_o to_o rest_v our_o love_n upon_o god_n and_o to_o love_v other_o thing_n only_o for_o and_o in_o him_z or_o if_o soul_n delight_v thou_o in_o god_n let_v these_o be_v love_v because_o these_o also_o subject_n to_o mutability_n from_o he_o only_o have_v their_o stability_n else_o perirent_fw-la else_o alioquin_fw-la irent_fw-la &_o perirent_fw-la pass-on_a they_o will_v and_o at_o last_o pass-away_a in_o he_o therefore_o let_v these_o also_o be_v love_v and_o entice_v with_o thou_o to_o he_o as_o many_o of_o they_o as_o thou_o can_v and_o say_v unto_o they_o he_o let_v we_o love_v he_o let_v we_o love_v he_o make_v these_o thing_n and_o he_o be_v not_o far_o off_o for_o he_o make_v they_o not_o and_o so_o leave_v they_o but_o be_v of_o he_o they_o be_v in_o he_o too_o lo_o where_o he_o be_v where_o truth_n be_v rellish_v well_o he_o be_v in_o the_o heart_n but_o alas_o that_o heart_n have_v stray_v from_o he_o vulg._n isa_n 46.8_o vulg._n return_v o_o prevaricator_n unto_o your_o heart_n again_o and_o be_v unite_v unto_o he_o that_o make_v you_o stand_v with_o he_o and_o you_o shall_v stand_v fast_o rest_n in_o he_o and_o you_o shall_v be_v at_o rest_n whither_o go_v you_o into_o precipice_n whither_o go_v you_o the_o good_a you_o court_v and_o woo_v be_v from_o he_o and_o so_o much_o as_o it_o be_v it_o be_v in_o your_o tend_v towards_o he_o good_a and_o delicious_a to_o you_o but_o just_o then_o embitter_v to_o we_o when_o it_o be_v once_o unjust_o love_v with_o the_o desertion_n of_o he_o from_o who_o it_o be_v to_o what_o purpose_n still_o and_o still_o tread_v you_o those_o difficult_a and_o toilsome_a path_n rest_n be_v not_o there_o where_o you_o seek_v it_o seek_v free_o what_o you_o do_v seek_v but_o there_o it_o be_v not_o where_o you_o be_v seek_v it_o a_o bless_a life_n you_o seek_v in_o the_o region_n of_o death_n and_o it_o be_v not_o there_o how_o life_n happy_a there_o where_o neither_o life_n but_o life_n itself_o descend_v hither_o and_o undergo_v our_o death_n and_o out_o of_o the_o super-abundance_n of_o its_o life_n slay_v it_o and_o then_o with_o a_o voice_n of_o thunder_n call_v out_o unto_o we_o that_o we_o shall_v hence_o return_v unto_o he_o into_o that_o secret_a place_n from_o whence_o he_o come_v forth_o unto_o we_o come_v into_o that_o first_o pure_a virgin_n womb_n where_o he_o espouse_v this_o humane_a creature_n of_o our_o mortal_a flesh_n 19.5_o ps_n 19.5_o that_o it_o may_v not_o be_v ever_o mortal_a and_o thence_o like_o a_o bridegroom_n go_v forth_o of_o his_o chamber_n he_o rejoice_v as_o a_o giant_n to_o run_v his_o course_n but_o do_v run_v all_o the_o way_n here_o stay_v not_o call_v out_o unto_o we_o by_o his_o word_n by_o his_o deed_n by_o his_o death_n by_o his_o life_n by_o his_o descension_n by_o his_o ascension_n call_v out_o unto_o we_o to_o return_v unto_o he_o and_o then_o present_o vanish_v from_o our_o eye_n that_o we_o may_v return_v
appear_v to_o our_o sense_n can_a notwithstanding_o hear_v and_o relieve_v our_o necessity_n i_o begin_v therefore_o when_o yet_o a_o child_n to_o pray_v unto_o thou_o my_o aid_n and_o refuge_n and_o then_o first_o enure_v my_o unskilled_a tongue_n to_o the_o invocate_a of_o thy_o holy_a name_n and_o beg_v of_o thou_o though_o a_o little_a one_o with_o no_o little_a passion_n that_o thou_o will_v save_v i_o from_o whip_v at_o school_n and_o not_o only_o thou_o do_v not_o hear_v i_o in_o that_o which_o be_v inflict_v on_o i_o for_o my_o good_a but_o my_o elder_n also_o and_o even_o my_o parent_n far_o from_o wish_v i_o any_o harm_n make_v a_o jest_n of_o those_o my_o stripe_n my_o then_o grievous_a and_o remediless_a evil_n be_v there_o o_o lord_n among_o thou_o any_o so_o great_a a_o soul_n and_o with_o so_o strong_a a_o passion_n adhere_v to_o thou_o be_v there_o any_o i_o say_v who_o become_v not_o out_o of_o a_o senseless_a stupidity_n but_o by_o a_o inseparable_a union_n to_o 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a_o aversion_n from_o his_o book_n and_o yet_o i_o sin_v o_o lord_n god_n thou_o ordainer_n and_o creator_n of_o all_o thing_n of_o nature_n and_o only_o not_o the_o ordainer_n of_o sin_n o_o lord_n my_o god_n i_o be_v too_o blame_v in_o do_v then_o contrary_a to_o the_o will_n of_o my_o parent_n and_o of_o those_o my_o preceptor_n for_o i_o may_v have_v put_v that_o learning_n to_o good_a use_n to_o which_o they_o breed_v i_o with_o another_o purpose_n but_o my_o undutifulnesse_n arise_v not_o out_o of_o choice_n of_o something_o better_o but_o mere_o out_o of_o a_o lust_n to_o play_v proud_o aspire_v to_o be_v a_o victor_n in_o my_o sport_n over_o those_o that_o play_v with_o i_o and_o to_o have_v my_o ear_n tickle_v with_o false_a applause_n that_o they_o may_v itch_v more_o hot_o after_o it_o the_o same_o stillmore_a and_o more_o perilous_a curiosity_n now_o begin_v to_o sparkle_v through_o my_o wanton_a eye_n towards_o the_o show_v and_o play_v of_o the_o more_o age_a the_o donor_n of_o which_o flourish_n afterward_o in_o so_o grand_a a_o reputation_n that_o almost_o all_o the_o spectator_n fore-wish_a the_o same_o honour_n one_o day_n to_o their_o little_a one_o and_o yet_o they_o be_v well_o content_a they_o shall_v be_v whip_v if_o by_o such_o show_v they_o be_v seduce_v from_o their_o study_n by_o which_o study_n they_o desire_v their_o son_n may_v one_o day_n arrive_v to_o present_v such_o show_v look_v upon_o these_o thing_n o_o lord_n with_o thy_o pity_n and_o deliver_v we_o who_o now_o call_v upon_o thou_o and_o deliver_v they_o also_o who_o do_v not_o yet_o call_v upon_o thou_o that_o they_o also_o may_v call_v upon_o thou_o and_o thou_o may_v deliver_v they_o chap._n xi_o of_o his_o *_o sickness_n and_o in_o it_o *_o his_o desire_a baptism_n for_o what_o reason_n upon_o hope_n of_o his_o recovery_n defer_v by_o his_o mother_n for_o i_o have_v hear_v somewhat_o yet_o a_o child_n of_o life_n eternal_a that_o be_v promise_v unto_o we_o by_o the_o humility_n of_o thy_o son_n our_o lord_n god_n descend_v hither_o because_o of_o our_o pride_n and_o i_o be_v already_o sign_v with_o the_o sign_n of_o his_o cross_n and_o be_v season_v with_o his_o baptize_v his_o a_o custom_n in_o primitive_a time_n to_o put_v salt_n into_o the_o mouth_n of_o the_o catechumeni_fw-la intimate_v a_o spiritual_a pre-seasoning_a of_o they_o for_o the_o reception_n of_o the_o grace_n of_o baptism_n see_v 3._o l._n con._n carthag_n 5._o can_n and_o be_v a_o symbol_n of_o incorruption_n see_v ezek._n 16.4_o 5._o mark_v 9.49_o in_o latter_a time_n this_o ceremony_n be_v use_v to_o the_o new_o baptize_v salt_n even_o from_o my_o mother_n womb_n a_o woman_n who_o put_v much_o hope_n in_o thou_o and_o thou_o see_v o_o lord_n i_o happen_v then_o to_o be_v pain_v at_o my_o stomach_n and_o sudden_o seize_v with_o a_o violent_a calenture_n near_o unto_o death_n thou_o see_v o_o my_o god_n for_o even_o then_o be_v thou_o my_o guardian_n with_o what_o passion_n of_o mind_n and_o with_o what_o faith_n i_o importune_v the_o piety_n of_o my_o own_o mother_n and_o of_o our_o common_a mother_n thy_o church_n for_o the_o baptism_n of_o thy_o christ_n my_o lord_n and_o god_n and_o this_o much-perplexed_n mother_n of_o my_o flesh_n who_o now_o travail_v far_o more_o dear_o in_o the_o womb_n of_o her_o chaste_a heart_n of_o the_o second_o birth_n of_o my_o eternal_a salvation_n by_o her_o faith_n in_o thou_o than_o before_o she_o have_v do_v of_o my_o temporal_a be_v take_v care_n that_o with_o all_o speed_n i_o shall_v be_v initiate_v and_o purge_v with_o the_o salutary_a infant_n salutary_a eucharist_n as_o well_o as_o baptism_n in_o those_o day_n give_v to_o infant_n sacrament_n confess_v thou_o o_o lord_n jesus_n for_o remission_n of_o sin_n but_o that_o i_o have_v a_o sudden_a recovery_n upon_o which_o this_o my_o cleanse_n be_v for_o that_o time_n defer_v although_o it_o can_v not_o be_v avoid_v but_o that_o if_o i_o live_v long_o i_o shall_v be_v yet_o more_o defile_v and_o so_o the_o guilt_n contract_v from_o the_o renew_a pollution_n of_o sin_n after_o that_o holy_a lavatory_n will_v have_v become_v great_a far_o and_o far_o more_o dangerous_a thus_o then_o i_o believe_v in_o thou_o and_o she_o and_o the_o whole_a family_n except_v my_o father_n who_o yet_o can_v not_o oversway_v in_o i_o the_o just_a power_n of_o my_o mother_n piety_n to_o make_v i_o not_o believe_v in_o christ_n as_o he_o at_o that_o time_n believe_v not_o in_o he_o for_o it_o be_v her_o holy_a endeavour_n that_o thou_o my_o god_n shall_v be_v my_o father_n more_o than_o he_o and_o thou_o assi_v she_o herein_o to_o overcome_v her_o husband_n to_o who_o in_o other_o thing_n she_o though_o much_o better_a yield_v all_o obedience_n because_o she_o be_v to_o yield_v all_o obedience_n to_o thou_o and_o this_o obedience_n to_o her_o husband_n be_v command_v by_o thou_o necessitate_v thou_o man_n baptize_v in_o their_o sickness_n be_v by_o the_o canon_n prohibit_v sacred_a order_n because_o their_o baptism_n seem_v necessitate_v for_o what_o reason_n o_o my_o god_n i_o will_v fain_o know_v be_v this_o my_o baptism_n at_o that_o time_n delay_v and_o whether_o for_o any_o my_o great_a good_a be_v the_o reins_o of_o my_o sin_v long_o leave_v loose_a upon_o i_o for_o if_o they_o be_v not_o then_o leave_v loose_a whence_o be_v it_o that_o on_o every_o side_n we_o do_v still_o hear_v it_o say_v of_o such_o and_o such_o let_v he_o alone_o let_v he_o do_v what_o he_o will_v for_o he_o be_v not_o yet_o baptize_v and_o yet_o concern_v corporal_a sanity_n we_o say_v not_o let_v he_o yet_o receive_v more_o wound_n for_o he_o be_v not_o
because_o the_o more_o i_o love_v he_o the_o more_o i_o abhor_a and_o dread_a that_o my_o cruel_a enemy_n death_n that_o bereave_v i_o of_o he_o fancy_v it_o a_o monster_n that_o will_v soon_o devour_v the_o rest_n of_o man_n because_o it_o can_v destroy_v he_o even_o thus_o i_o well_o remember_v stand_v i_o then_o affect_v behold_v my_o heart_n o_o my_o god_n behold_v and_o see_v into_o i_o how_o i_o remember_v this_o very_a well_o o_o thou_o my_o hope_n that_o now_o cleanse_v i_o from_o the_o impurity_n of_o such_o passion_n guide_v my_o eye_n unto_o thy_o beauty_n and_o pluck_v my_o foot_n out_o of_o these_o snare_n for_o i_o wonder_v much_o that_o the_o rest_n of_o mortal_n can_v any_o long_o live_v when_o he_o who_o i_o love_v as_o a_o thing_n immortal_a be_v now_o dead_a and_o yet_o more_o wonder_v that_o myself_o be_v only_o another_o he_o can_v live_v when_o he_o be_v go_v well_o say_v one_o of_o his_o friend_n animae_fw-la dimidium_fw-la mea_fw-la half_a of_o my_o soul_n for_o i_o deem_v he_o and_o i_o to_o be_v but_o one_o soul_n as_o it_o be_v in_o different_a body_n and_o therefore_o my_o life_n be_v a_o horror_n to_o i_o who_o will_v not_o live_v thus_o a_o half_n and_o death_n yet_o a_o great_a affright_n to_o i_o lest_o he_o shall_v perish_v all_o who_o i_o so_o passionate_o love_v confessio_fw-la love_v s._n austin_n review_v this_o work_n in_o his_o retractation_n 2._o l._n 6._o c._n censure_v this_o expression_n quasi_fw-la declamatio_fw-la levis_fw-la potius_fw-la quam_fw-la gravis_fw-la confessio_fw-la chap._n vii_o he_o forsake_v the_o place_n of_o their_o acquaintance_n and_o go_v to_o carthage_n o_o fond_a madness_n that_o know_v not_o how_o to_o love_v man_n men-like_a o_o sottish_a man_n so_o impatient_o take_v to_o heart_n accident_n only_o humane_a such_o as_o poor_a i_o then_o be_v therefore_o i_o storm_v and_o sigh_v and_o weep_v and_o be_v distract_v bereave_v both_o of_o content_n and_o counsel_n for_o i_o carry_v about_o a_o soul_n all_o lacerate_v and_o gore_v in_o blood_n and_o impatient_a long_o to_o be_v carry_v by_o i_o and_o where_o to_o repose_v it_o i_o find_v not_o not_o in_o delightsome_a grove_n nor_o in_o play_n and_o music_n not_o in_o fragrant_a odour_n nor_o in_o exquisite_a banquet_n not_o in_o the_o pleasure_n of_o the_o chamber_n or_o of_o the_o bed_n not_o in_o book_n or_o poesy_n take_v it_o any_o rest_n all_o thing_n look_v ghastly_a even_o the_o day_n and_o whatever_o it_o be_v that_o be_v not_o he_o importune_v it_o be_v and_o loathsome_a except_o mourning_n and_o tear_n and_o in_o these_o only_a it_o find_v some_o small_a content_n and_o when_o at_o any_o time_n i_o retire_v my_o soul_n from_o these_o i_o be_v re-surcharged_n with_o the_o grievous_a burden_n of_o my_o misery_n which_o be_v only_o to_o be_v lighten_v by_o thou_o o_o lord_n only_o by_o thou_o to_o be_v remove_v and_o i_o know_v this_o but_o yet_o be_v so_o much_o the_o less_o either_o willing_a or_o able_a to_o find_v remedy_n because_o thou_o then_o to_o i_o be_v no_o solid_a or_o stable_a thing_n when_o my_o despair_a thought_n flee_v for_o support_v unto_o thou_o for_o it_o be_v not_o thou_o but_o a_o empty_a phantasm_n and_o my_o own_o error_n that_o be_v my_o god_n whereon_o assay_v â—o_o place_n my_o soul_n that_o it_o may_v find_v some_o stay_n through_o this_o inanity_n it_o still_o relapsed_a and_o again_o come_v roll_v back_o upon_o i_o and_o myself_o remain_v the_o alone_a unhappy_a place_n to_o myself_o where_o i_o can_v neither_o be_v nor_o be_v from_o thence_o for_o whether_o can_v my_o heart_n from_o my_o heart_n fly_v away_o where_o can_v i_o avoid_v myself_o and_o where_o will_v not_o myself_o follow_v i_o and_o yet_o far_o from_o my_o country_n i_o flee_v for_o my_o eye_n less_o miss_v he_o where_o they_o be_v not_o use_v to_o see_v he_o and_o thus_o forsake_v tagaste_n i_o go_v to_o carthage_n chap._n viii_o his_o wound_n eur_v by_o time_n and_o new_a friendship_n time_n do_v not_o lose_v time_n nor_o idle_o roll_v away_o by_o these_o our_o sense_n but_o in_o the_o mind_n produce_v strange_a operation_n behold_v they_o come_v and_o go_v day_n by_o day_n and_o in_o come_v and_o pass_v they_o insinuate_v into_o i_o other_o image_n and_o other_o remembrance_n and_o by_o degree_n repair_v i_o with_o my_o former_o know_a delight_n to_o which_o that_o my_o grief_n at_o length_n give_v place_n but_o there_o succeed_v though_o no_o new_a sorrow_n yet_o the_o cause_n only_o of_o more_o sorrow_n for_o whence_o do_v that_o my_o last_o grief_n so_o easy_o and_o so_o deep_o wound_v i_o but_o because_o i_o have_v spill_v my_o soul_n upon_o a_o bed_n of_o sand_n and_o love_v a_o mortal_a as_o if_o he_o can_v not_o die_v and_o that_o which_o recover_v and_o repair_v i_o of_o this_o be_v but_o like_a solace_n of_o other_o mortal_a friend_n with_o who_o i_o love_v something_o which_o be_v not_o love_v for_o thou_o even_o those_o fabulous_a delusion_n manicheisme_n delusion_n manicheisme_n and_o long-spun_a lie_n by_o the_o adulterous_a touch_n whereof_o our_o lascivient_fw-la mind_n through_o our_o itch_a ear_n become_v still_o more_o defile_v nor_o do_v these_o delusion_n perish_v to_o i_o when_o my_o friend_n do_v beside_o which_o there_o be_v also_o many_o other_o thing_n cement_n together_o our_o affection_n to_o chat_v and_o laugh_v together_o civil_a obsequiousness_n and_o mutual_a compliance_n together_o to_o read_v merry_a book_n to_o jest_v together_o and_o together_o be_v solemn_a to_o dissent_v from_o one_o another_o sometime_o without_o offence_n and_o as_o a_o man_n will_v do_v from_o himself_o and_o by_o this_o disagree_v in_o some_o very_o few_o thing_n to_o season_n and_o relish_v the_o more_o our_o consentment_n in_o the_o rest_n to_o teach_v one_o another_o somewhat_o or_o somewhat_o to_o learn_v to_o expect_v those_o absent_a with_o impatience_n embrace_v their_o return_n with_o joy_n it_o be_v usual_a by_o these_o and_o the_o like_a express_v and_o emanation_n from_o heart_n continual_o reflect_v interchange_v love_n through_o the_o countenance_n through_o the_o tongue_n through_o the_o eye_n and_o through_o a_o thousand_o other_o charm_a motion_n as_o it_o be_v by_o so_o much_o fuel_n heap_v on_o these_o fire_n to_o melt_v down_o soul_n and_o to_o cast_v many_o of_o they_o into_o one_o chap._n ix_o yet_o these_o too_o fail_v he_o and_o this_o be_v it_o that_o be_v love_v in_o a_o friend_n and_o so_o love_v that_o the_o conscience_n be_v self-accused_n in_o any_o who_o continue_v not_o to_o love_v he_o who_o love_v he_o again_o or_o who_o love_v not_o that_o man_n again_o who_o love_v he_o first_o require_v nothing_o from_o his_o body_n but_o only_a demonstration_n of_o his_o affection_n and_o for_o this_o be_v those_o mourning_n if_o one_o die_v and_o night_n of_o sorrow_n and_o a_o languish_a heart_n have_v all_o its_o sweet_n convert_v into_o bitterness_n and_o from_o the_o dear_a loss_n of_o the_o life_n of_o those_o who_o be_v dead_a even_o the_o death_n of_o those_o alive_a but_o alway-blessed_n he_o who_o love_v *_o thou_o and_o in_o thou_o *_o his_o friend_n and_o for_o thou_o *_o his_o eenmy_n for_o he_o alone_o lose_v nothing_o dear_a to_o who_o all_o be_v dear_a only_o in_o he_o who_o he_o never_o lose_v and_o who_o be_v this_o neverlost_a but_o our_o god_n the_o god_n that_o make_v and_o fill_v heaven_n and_o earth_n 17.71_o jer._n 23.24_o ps_n 119.142_o jo._n 17.71_o and_o that_o even_o by_o fill_v they_o make_v they_o thou_o none_o lose_v but_o who_o leave_v and_o who_o so_o leave_v thou_o whither_o go_v he_o or_o whither_o do_v he_o fly_v but_o from_o thou_o gracious_a back_o again_o to_o thou_o offend_v for_o in_o what_o place_n find_v he_o not_o the_o presence_n of_o thy_o law_n in_o his_o punishment_n and_o thy_o law_n be_v truth_n and_o truth_n be_v thyself_o chap._n x._o all_o thing_n love_v beside_o god_n pass_v away_o and_o leave_v the_o lover_n to_o embrace_v sorrow_n 80.19_o ps_n 80.19_o tvrn_v we_o unto_o thou_o o_o god_n of_o power_n show_v we_o the_o beauty_n of_o thy_o countenance_n and_o we_o shall_v be_v whole_a for_o which_o way_n soever_o the_o soul_n of_o man_n turn_v itself_o it_o be_v consign_v unto_o sorrow_n unless_o only_o towards_o thou_o yea_o though_o it_o seize_v upon_o all_o those_o other_o beauty_n that_o be_v out_o of_o itself_o and_o out_o of_o thou_o which_o yet_o can_v be_v none_o at_o all_o unless_o they_o be_v from_o thou_o all_o which_o have_v their_o rise_n and_o their_o set_n their_o spring_n and_o their_o fall_n and_o in_o their_o spring_a they_o begin_v as_o it_o be_v to_o be_v and_o then_o grow_v on_o to_o attain_v perfection_n perfect_v
away_o she_o depart_v into_o africa_n vow_v unto_o thou_o never_o to_o know_v any_o other_o man_n and_o leave_v with_o i_o the_o son_n i_o have_v by_o she_o but_o unhappy_a i_o not_o able_a to_o imitate_v a_o woman_n impatient_a of_o the_o two_o year_n delay_n in_o which_o time_n i_o may_v not_o enjoy_v she_o i_o make_v suit_n to_o and_o be_v not_o so_o much_o a_o lover_n of_o marriage_n as_o a_o slave_n of_o lust_n get_v i_o another_o though_o no_o wife_n that_o so_o by_o the_o continuance_n of_o the_o same_o custom_n with_o she_o i_o may_v sustain_v and_o preserve_v in_o its_o vigour_n or_o also_o augment_v that_o disease_n of_o my_o soul_n till_o it_o may_v arrive_v to_o the_o kingdom_n of_o marriage_n and_o thus_o be_v the_o wound_n that_o be_v make_v in_o i_o by_o the_o cut_n off_o of_o my_o former_a concubine_n not_o now_o cure_v at_o all_o but_z after_o most_o acute_a and_o burn_a torment_n grow_v more_o putrify_v and_o corrupt_a and_o under_o a_o cold_o and_o less_o violent_a pain_n a_o more_o desperate_a sore_n chap._n xvi_o yet_o his_o lust_n somewhat_o restrain_v from_o the_o fear_n he_o have_v *_o of_o death_n and_z *_o of_o the_o soul_n immortality_n and_o *_o of_o future_a judgement_n to_o thou_o be_v praise_n to_o thou_o be_v glory_n fountain_n of_o mercy_n thou_o come_v still_o more_o near_o as_o i_o become_v more_o wretched_a and_o even_o very_a now_o be_v thy_o right_a hand_n ready_a when_o i_o be_v quite_o sink_v to_o pull_v i_o out_o of_o this_o mire_n and_o to_o wash_v i_o clean_o and_o i_o know_v nothing_o thereof_o nor_o be_v there_o any_o thing_n that_o stay_v i_o from_o yet-a-deep_a stream_n of_o carnal_a voluptuousness_n save_o the_o fear_n of_o death_n and_o thy_o judgement_n to_o come_v which_o terror_n by_o all_o my_o various_a opinion_n can_v never_o be_v quite_o deface_v in_o my_o soul_n and_o often_o i_o reason_v with_o my_o friend_n alipius_n and_o nebridius_fw-la *_o of_o the_o end_n of_o good_a and_o wicked_a person_n and_o *_o that_o epicurus_n above_o all_o man_n with_o i_o shall_v carry_v away_o the_o prize_n but_o that_o i_o believe_v the_o soul_n after_o death_n still_o live_v and_o be_v treat_v according_a to_o its_o meritâ—_n a_o thing_n which_o epicurus_n credit_v not_o and_o i_o ask_v whether_o if_o so_o be_v we_o may_v be_v immortal_a and_o may_v live_v in_o the_o perpetuate_v pleasure_n of_o the_o body_n without_o any_o fear_n at_o all_o of_o lose_v they_o any_o more_o whether_o i_o say_v this_o be_v not_o enough_o to_o be_v happy_a or_o whether_o some_o thing_n else_o be_v desirable_a to_o it_o not_o know_v that_o this_o also_o be_v a_o great_a part_n of_o my_o misery_n that_o so_o deep_o plunge_v and_o blind_v i_o can_v not_o cast_v my_o thought_n upon_o the_o fair_a light_n of_o virtue_n and_o honesty_n and_o that_o sovereign_a beauty_n interior_o by_o the_o soul_n discern_v though_o not_o by_o the_o eye_n of_o flesh_n which_o be_v embrace_v gratis_o and_o without_o any_o bodily_a pleasure_n issue_v from_o it_o neither_o consider_v i_o so_o wretched_a from_o what_o principle_n it_o come_v that_o this_o be_v to_o i_o a_o great_a pleasure_n sweet_o to_o confer_v with_o my_o friend_n even_o concern_v these_o filthy_a pleasure_n and_o that_o without_o friend_n also_o i_o can_v not_o be_v happy_a according_a to_o my_o then_o opinion_n though_o in_o never_o so_o much_o affluence_n of_o those_o carnal_a delight_n yet_o which_o friend_n i_o love_v gratis_o without_o any_o interest_n of_o my_o corporal_a pleasure_n and_o so_o perceive_v myself_o gratis_o also_o of_o they_o belove_v o_o crooked_a path_n wo_n to_o the_o audacious_a soul_n that_o depart_v from_o thou_o foolish_o hope_n elsewhere_o to_o find_v something_o better_o and_o when_o she_o have_v turn_v and_o return_v herself_o on_o back_n and_o side_n and_o belly_n she_o find_v all_o thing_n hard_a and_o uneasy_a and_o thou_o only_o rest_v and_o yet_o behold_v thou_o patient_o stay_v by_o we_o and_o free_a we_o from_o these_o our_o miserable_a wander_n and_o put_v we_o into_o thy_o way_n and_o encourage_a we_o and_o say_v run_v and_o i_o will_v sustain_v you_o and_o i_o will_v conduct_v you_o through_o whither_o you_o desire_v to_o go_v and_o at_o your_o journey_n end_n also_o i_o will_v sustain_v you_o lib_fw-la vii_o chap._n i._n his_o entrance_n now_o be_v thirty_o year_n old_a into_o man_n estate_n his_o apprehension_n of_o god_n as_o inviolable_a incorruptible_a immutable_a every_o way_n infinite_a but_o yet_o corporeal_a *_o decease_a now_o be_v my_o youth_n so_o evil_a and_o so_o profane_a and_o i_o *_o enter_v into_o the_o state_n of_o manhood_n advance_v in_o vanity_n as_o in_o age_n and_o imagine_v no_o substance_n but_o only_o such_o as_o with_o these_o our_o eye_n we_o usual_o behold_v i_o indeed_o never_o think_v thou_o o_o god_n to_o bear_v a_o humane_a shape_n since_o the_o time_n i_o have_v hear_v any_o thing_n of_o wisdom_n i_o always_o avoid_v so_o gross_a a_o conceit_n and_o be_v much_o joy_v when_o i_o find_v the_o same_o also_o to_o be_v the_o faith_n of_o our_o spiritual_a mother_n thy_o catholic_n church_n but_o what_o other_o thing_n i_o shall_v think_v thou_o to_o be_v be_v not_o easy_o resolve_v and_o i_o a_o man_n and_o such_o a_o man_n yet_o endeavour_v to_o know_v and_o apprehend_v thou_o the_o supreme_a and_o the_o only_a and_o the_o true_a god_n and_o from_o the_o bottom_n of_o my_o soul_n i_o believe_v thou_o to_o be_v incorruptible_a and_o inviolable_a and_o immutable_a because_o how_o and_o whence_o i_o know_v not_o but_o i_o plain_o see_v and_o be_v assure_v 4._o exit_fw-la l._n 7._o c._n 4._o â–³_o that_o that_o which_o can_v be_v corrupt_v nor_o injure_v and_o hurt_v nor_o change_v be_v doubtless_o more_o perfect_a and_o more_o excellent_a than_o what_o be_v capable_a of_o corruption_n or_o violation_n or_o mutation_n and_o then_o again_o â–³_o that_o no_o soul_n ever_o be_v or_o shall_v be_v able_a to_o imagine_v any_o thing_n which_o shall_v be_v something_o better_a than_o thou_o who_o be_v the_o very_o best_a and_o chief_a good_n but_o since_o the_o incorruptible_a be_v most_o true_o and_o certain_o preferable_a before_o the_o corruptible_a i_o can_v with_o my_o thought_n have_v ascend_v unto_o something_o that_o will_v have_v be_v better_a than_o my_o god_n unless_o thou_o be_v incorruptible_a but_o still_o i_o be_v force_v to_o imagine_v thou_o though_o not_o figure_v like_o a_o man_n yet_o as_o something_o corporeal_a have_v a_o certain_a space_n of_o be_v either_o infuse_v into_o and_o through_o all_o the_o world_n or_o also_o diffuse_v infinite_o beyond_o it_o because_o what_o i_o abstract_v from_o be_v in_o such_o space_n seem_v to_o i_o not_o to_o be_v at_o all_o i_o therefore_o conceive_v thy_o greatness_n o_o life_n of_o my_o life_n to_o be_v such_o as_o to_o penetrate_v by_o a_o extension_n through_o a_o infinite_a space_n on_o every_o side_n the_o whole_a mass_n of_o the_o world_n and_o to_o flow_v to_o all_o immensity_n beyond_o it_o without_o any_o limit_n so_o that_o thou_o the_o earth_n have_v the_o heaven_n have_v thou_o all_o thing_n have_v thou_o and_o they_o be_v bound_v in_o thou_o but_o thou_o no_o where_o and_o as_o this_o body_n of_o air_n which_o float_v above_o the_o earth_n hinder_v not_o the_o dart_a of_o a_o sunbeam_n through_o it_o which_o beam_n penetrate_v it_o not_o by_o cut_v or_o break_v the_o part_n but_o by_o fill_v the_o whole_a in_o such_o manner_n i_o conceive_v the_o body_n not_o only_o of_o the_o heaven_n or_o of_o the_o air_n or_o water_n but_o of_o the_o thick_a earth_n also_o transpassable_a by_o thou_o and_o in_o all_o her_o least_o as_o well_o as_o great_a part_n pierceable_a to_o receive_v every_o where_o thy_o presence_n thus_o with_o thy_o secret_a inspiration_n both_o intrinsically_a and_o extrinsecal_o actuate_a and_o manage_v all_o those_o thing_n which_o thou_o have_v create_v so_o i_o conceit_a not_o able_a to_o think_v of_o any_o other_o way_n though_o this_o be_v false_a for_o thus_o a_o great_a part_n of_o earth_n will_v receive_v a_o great_a part_n of_o thy_o essence_n and_o a_o lesser_a a_o less_o and_o in_o such_o a_o sense_n will_v all_o thing_n be_v full_a of_o thou_o that_o the_o body_n of_o a_o elephant_n will_v contain_v a_o great_a quantity_n of_o thou_o than_o that_o of_o a_o sparrow_n by_o how_o much_o it_o be_v big_a an_o possess_v a_o great_a space_n and_o so_o thou_o shall_v apply_v thy_o presence_n to_o the_o part_n of_o the_o world_n by_o parcel_n a_o great_a part_n of_o thou_o to_o the_o large_a and_o a_o lesser_a to_o the_o small_a but_o thou_o be_v nothing_o so_o notwithstanding_o as_o yet_o thou_o have_v not_o so_o far_o
mind_n that_o i_o have_v any_o where_o hear_v the_o like_a whereupon_o suppress_v the_o course_n of_o my_o tear_n i_o rise_v up_o interpret_n it_o to_o be_v nothing_o else_o but_o a_o divine_a admonition_n that_o i_o shall_v open_v the_o book_n and_o read_v the_o place_n i_o first_o light_n upon_o for_o i_o have_v hear_v of_o antonius_n *_o that_o enter_v by_o chance_n into_o a_o church_n when_o the_o gospel_n be_v read_v he_o take_v himself_o to_o be_v admonish_v as_o if_o that_o be_v particular_o address_v to_o he_o what_o be_v then_o read_v 19.21_o mat._n 19.21_o go_v and_o sell_v that_o thou_o have_v and_o give_v to_o the_o poor_a and_o thou_o shall_v have_v treasure_n in_o heaven_n and_o come_v and_o follow_v i_o and_z *_o that_o by_o this_o oracle_n he_o be_v out_o of_o hand_n convert_v unto_o thou_o so_o get_v up_o hasty_o i_o return_v to_o the_o place_n where_o alipius_n be_v sit_v for_o there_o when_o i_o arise_v i_o have_v leave_v the_o apostle_n book_n i_o catch_v it_o up_o open_v it_o read_z in_o silence_n the_o piece_n of_o the_o chapter_n on_o which_o i_o first_o cast_v my_o eye_n not_o in_o riot_v and_o drunkenness_n 13.13_o rom._n 13.13_o not_o in_o chamber_v and_o wantonness_n not_o in_o strife_n and_o envy_v but_o put_v you_o on_o the_o lord_n jesus_n christ_n and_o make_v not_o provision_n for_o the_o flesh_n to_o fulfil_v the_o lust_n thereof_o i_o will_v read_v no_o further_o nor_o be_v there_o need_n for_o at_o the_o end_n of_o these_o line_n as_o it_o be_v with_o a_o new_a light_n of_o confidence_n and_o security_n stream_v into_o my_o soul_n the_o darkness_n of_o all_o former_a doubt_v and_o hesitancy_n be_v dispel_v then_o put_v my_o finger_n or_o i_o know_v not_o what_o other_o mark_n between_z i_o shut_v the_o book_n and_o now_o with_o a_o serene_a and_o untroubled_a countenance_n relate_v all_o to_o alipius_n who_o also_o thus_o discover_v what_o shall_v be_v do_v likewise_o in_o he_o which_o i_o observe_v not_o he_o request_v to_o see_v what_o i_o have_v read_v i_o show_v he_o the_o place_n then_o he_o look_v attentive_o further_a than_o i_o have_v read_v who_o know_v not_o what_o follow_v there_o find_v these_o the_o next_o word_n he_o that_o be_v weak_a in_o the_o faith_n receive_v you_o which_o word_n he_o apply_v to_o himself_o and_o so_o show_v they_o to_o i_o but_o this_o very_a admonition_n sufficient_o confirm_v he_o and_o straight_o without_o any_o afflict_a delay_n do_v he_o join_v himself_o to_o i_o in_o this_o good_a and_o holy_a resolution_n so_o please_v and_o agreeable_a to_o his_o former_a manner_n in_o the_o virtuous_a inclination_n of_o which_o he_o always_o aforetime_o have_v far_o surpass_v i_o thence_o we_o go_v in_o to_o my_o mother_n we_o relate_v our_o resolution_n to_o she_o she_o rejoice_v we_o tell_v she_o all_o the_o circumstance_n thereof_o she_o exult_v and_o triumph_n and_o fall_v a_o blessing_n thou_o who_o be_v able_a to_o do_v above_o that_o which_o we_o ask_v or_o think_v because_o she_o see_v so_o much_o more_o grant_v she_o by_o thou_o concern_v i_o than_o ever_o she_o have_v petition_v thou_o for_o with_o all_o those_o her_o miserable_a and_o lamentable_a groan_n for_o in_o such_o a_o full_a manner_n do_v thou_o convert_v i_o unto_o thou_o that_o i_o seek_v now_o no_o more_o after_o wife_n nor_o after_o any_o other_o hope_n of_o this_o world_n stand_v now_o with_o she_o upon_o that_o rule_n of_o faith_n c._n faith_n see_v 3._o l._n 11._o c._n as_o thou_o have_v in_o a_o vision_n represent_v i_o unto_o she_o so_o many_o year_n before_o 30.11_o psal_n 30.11_o and_o thus_o thou_o turn_v her_o mourning_n into_o gladness_n into_o a_o gladness_n much_o more_o plentiful_a than_o that_o she_o have_v aspire_v to_o and_o much_o more_o precious_a and_o chaste_a than_o that_o she_o have_v promise_v herself_o from_o her_o grandchild_n of_o my_o body_n lib_fw-la ix_o chap._n i._n doxology_n and_o thanksgiving_n for_o this_o his_o freedom_n from_o his_o former_a lust_n and_o the_o great_a joy_n and_o content_n he_o present_o receive_v therein_o 116.16_o psal_n 116.16_o o_o my_o lord_n i_o be_o thy_o servant_n i_o be_o thy_o servant_n and_o the_o son_n of_o thy_o handmaid_n thou_o have_v break_v my_o bond_n insunder_o i_o will_v offer_v to_o thou_o the_o sacrifice_n of_o praise_n let_v my_o heart_n and_o let_v my_o tongue_n praise_v thou_o 35.10.3_o psal_n 35.10.3_o and_o let_v all_o my_o bone_n say_v o_o lord_n who_o be_v like_a unto_o thou_o let_v they_o say_v this_o and_o do_v thou_o answer_v i_o and_o say_v thou_o again_o unto_o my_o soul_n i_o be_o thy_o salvation_n alas_o who_o and_o what_o a_o one_o be_v i_o what_o evil_a be_v not_o i_o evil_n either_o my_o deed_n or_o if_o not_o deed_n my_o word_n or_o if_o not_o word_n my_o will_n but_o thou_o o_o lord_n be_v good_a and_o merciful_a and_o thy_o right_a hand_n sound_v the_o profundity_n of_o that_o my_o death_n and_o draw_v out_o of_o the_o bottom_n of_o my_o heart_n that_o abyss_n of_o corruption_n sum_v up_o in_o this_o to_o will_z all_o that_o thou_o will_v and_o to_o will_v all_o that_o thou_o will_v not_o but_o where_o be_v all_o this_o while_n during_o so_o many_o year_n and_o out_o of_o what_o low_a and_o deep_a retreat_n of_o my_o soul_n do_v thou_o thus_o in_o a_o moment_n call_v forth_o that_o my_o now_o indeed_o freewill_n wherewith_o i_o shall_v submit_v my_o neck_n unto_o thy_o easy_a yoke_n and_o my_o shoulder_n unto_o thy_o light_a burden_n o_o jesus_n christ_n my_o helper_n and_o my_o redeemer_n how_o sweet_a on_o a_o sudden_a become_v it_o now_o unto_o i_o to_o want_v the_o sweet_n of_o those_o toy_n and_o what_o before_o it_o be_v my_o fear_n to_o lose_v how_o be_v it_o now_o my_o joy_n to_o dismiss_v for_o thou_o the_o true_a and_o the_o supreme_a sweetness_n do_v expel_v they_o from_o i_o thou_o expel_v they_o and_o thyself_o entere_v into_o i_o instead_o of_o they_o more_o delicious_a than_o all_o delight_n but_o not_o to_o flesh_n and_o blood_n more_o bright_a and_o glorious_a than_o all_o light_n but_o to_o the_o inward_a hide_a man_n exalt_v above_o the_o height_n of_o all_o honour_n but_o not_o to_o those_o who_o exalt_v themselves_o now_o be_v my_o mind_n free_v from_o those_o consuming-care_n of_o seek_v honour_n and_o of_o get_v wealth_n and_o of_o welter_v in_o pleasure_n and_o scratch_v the_o tickle_a and_o itchy_a scab_n of_o my_o lust_n and_o now_o my_o infant-tongue_n begin_v to_o converse_v with_o thou_o my_o ambition_n and_o my_o riches_n and_o my_o salvation_n my_o lord_n god_n chap._n ii_o his_o purpose_n to_o relinquish_v his_o profession_n of_o teach_v rhetoric_n but_o the_o thing_n defer_v till_o the_o vintage-vacation_n and_o it_o seem_v good_a to_o i_o before_o thou_o not_o tumultuous_o to_o break_v off_o but_o yet_o gentle_o to_o withdraw_v any_o further_a service_n of_o my_o tongue_n in_o those_o fair_n of_o loquacity_n that_o the_o young_a man_n who_o meditate_a not_o thy_o law_n not_o thy_o peace_n but_o lie_v foolery_n and_o forensick_a war_n may_v no_o long_o buy_v from_o my_o mouth_n arm_n for_o their_o madness_n and_o now_o there_o remain_v but_o a_o few_o day_n to_o the_o vacation_n of_o the_o vintage_n which_o i_o resolve_v patient_o to_o endure_v that_o i_o may_v relinquish_v my_o school_n at_o a_o accustom_a season_n and_o be_v now_o purchase_v by_o thou_o may_v return_v no_o more_o to_o be_v thus_o expose_v to_o sale_n this_o be_v then_o my_o purpose_n agree_v on_o before_o thou_o and_o among_o ourselves_o but_o not_o think_v fit_a to_o be_v divulge_v to_o other_o abroad_o although_o thou_o have_v give_v unto_o we_o ascend_v from_o the_o valley_n of_o tear_n and_o sing_v unto_o thou_o in_o this_o our_o ascent_n a_o song_n of_o degree_n and_o of_o joy_n 4._o psal_n 120.3_o 4._o sharp_a arrow_n and_o hot_a burn_a coal_n against_o the_o deceitful_a tongue_n which_o under_o pretence_n of_o advise_v our_o good_a avert_v we_o from_o it_o and_o as_o it_o use_v its_o meat_n in_o love_v consume_v we_o but_o thou_o have_v shoot_v through_o our_o heart_n with_o the_o love_n of_o thou_o and_o we_o carry_v the_o arrow_n of_o thy_o word_n stick_v in_o our_o entrail_n and_o the_o example_n of_o other_o thy_o servant_n as_o hot_a burn_a coal_n who_o thou_o have_v make_v of_o once_o black_a and_o dead_a now_o lively_a and_o lucid_a be_v throw_v into_o the_o bosom_n of_o our_o serious_a cogitation_n fire_v and_o consume_v our_o former_a heavy_a stupidity_n that_o our_o motion_n like_o that_o of_o fire_n shall_v point_v no_o more_o downward_o to_o low_a thing_n which_o example_n have_v kindle_v such_o a_o flame_n in_o we_o that_o all_o the_o blast_n of_o contradiction_n
from_o a_o deceitful_a tongue_n can_v only_o more_o increase_n but_o not_o extinguish_v it_o nevertheless_o because_o that_o by_o reason_n of_o thy_o name_n now_o so_o glorify_v through_o the_o world_n such_o our_o purpose_n and_o vow_n must_v needs_o find_v many_o commender_n it_o seem_v *_o that_o it_o may_v appear_v to_o have_v some_o relish_n of_o vainglory_n in_o i_o not_o to_o have_v patience_n till_o a_o vacation_n so_o near_o but_o to_o desert_v a_o profession_n so_o public_a and_o eye_v by_o all_o before_o it_o and_z *_o that_o the_o mouth_n of_o all_o man_n reflect_v on_o this_o my_o act_n and_o how_o near_o a_o breaking-up_a school_n i_o will_v yet_o prevent_v may_v say_v many_o thing_n as_o if_o i_o affect_v to_o magnify_v myself_o and_o seem_v some_o great_a one_o and_o yet_o what_o matter_a it_o to_o i_o that_o man_n shall_v divine_v and_o dispute_v my_o intention_n 14.16_o rom._n 14.16_o or_o that_o our_o good_a shall_v be_v thus_o evil-spoken_a of_o but_o beside_o the_o opportunity_n of_o the_o vintage-vacation_n so_o it_o be_v that_o in_o the_o heat_n of_o summer_n my_o lung_n begin_v *_o to_o fail_v under_o the_o too_o much_o toil_n of_o my_o school_n difficult_o *_o to_n fetch_v breath_n and_o by_o the_o pain_n of_o my_o breast_n to_o signify_v their_o hurt_n and_o now_o *_o to_o refuse_v any_o very_a loud_a or_o long_o speak_v which_o thing_n at_o the_o first_o have_v much_o trouble_v i_o because_o it_o will_v force_v i_o either_o they_o be_v incurable_a upon_o necessity_n to_o give_v over_o so_o burdensome_a a_o profession_n or_o if_o curable_a yet_o to_o intermit_v it_o but_o after_o that_o a_o resolute_a will_n to_o attend_v only_o on_o thou_o and_o to_o see_v how_o that_o thou_o be_v the_o lord_n be_v raise_v and_o confirm_v in_o i_o thou_o know_v o_o my_o god_n my_o joy_n that_o i_o have_v this_o also_o no_o false_a excuse_n to_o sweeten_v the_o discontent_n of_o those_o man_n who_o for_o their_o child_n benefit_n envy_v my_o liberty_n full_o of_o such_o joy_n i_o patient_o therefore_o endure_v that_o interval_n of_o time_n till_o it_o shall_v be_v run_v out_o i_o know_v not_o whither_o they_o be_v about_o some_o twenty_o day_n but_o they_o be_v endure_v not_o without_o some_o patience_n for_o i_o be_v already_o rid_v of_o those_o ambition_n which_o former_o help_v i_o to_o bear_v that_o heavy_a burden_n with_o which_o now_o therefore_o i_o shall_v have_v be_v overlay_v have_v not_o patience_n take_v their_o place_n some_o of_o thy_o servant_n my_o brethren_n may_v blame_v i_o for_o this_o that_o have_v a_o heart_n now_o full_o resign_v to_o thy_o service_n i_o shall_v any_o long_o though_o but_o for_o a_o hour_n sit_v down_o in_o the_o chair_n of_o lie_n and_o for_o my_o part_n i_o do_v not_o oppose_v they_o but_o thou_o o_o lord_n so_o full_a of_o mercy_n have_v thou_o not_o pardon_v and_o remit_v this_o sin_n also_o unto_o i_o among_o many_o other_o so_o horrible_a and_o deadly_a in_o the_o holy_a water_n of_o my_o baptism_n chap._n iii_o verecundus_n a_o citizen_n of_o milan_n offer_v his_o countryhouse_n for_o their_o retirement_n the_o death_n of_o verecundus_n and_o of_o nebridius_fw-la not_o long_a after_o s._n augustine_n conversion_n be_v both_o first_o make_v christian_n 6._o christian_n see_v l._n 8._o cap._n 6._o verecundus_n be_v much_o afflict_v concern_v this_o our_o purpose_n because_o thus_o he_o see_v himself_o by_o reason_n of_o the_o many_o bond_n wherewith_o he_o be_v most_o strait_o tie_v deprive_v of_o our_o society_n himself_o not_o yet_o a_o christian_a though_o his_o wife_n a_o baptize_v professor_n of_o the_o faith_n and_o yet_o be_v he_o *_o retard_v by_o she_o as_o one_o of_o his_o straight_a fetter_n from_o follow_v our_o intend_a course_n *_o and_o do_v deny_v to_o become_v a_o christian_a upon_o any_o other_o term_n than_o these_o he_o can_v not_o perform_v true_o he_o very_o courteous_o offer_v and_o lend_v we_o for_o the_o time_n of_o our_o abode_n in_o that_o place_n the_o use_n of_o his_o countryhouse_n thou_o o_o lord_n shall_v recompense_v he_o at_o the_o resurrection_n of_o the_o righteous_a since_o the_o lot_n of_o the_o righteous_a be_v already_o happen_v to_o he_o who_o though_o in_o our_o absence_n after_o we_o have_v remove_v to_o rome_n be_v seize_v by_o a_o corporal_a sickness_n be_v in_o it_o make_v a_o christian_a and_o a_o fidelis_n and_o so_o depart_v this_o life_n in_o which_o thing_n thou_o have_v mercy_n not_o only_o on_o he_o but_o on_o we_o lest_o consider_v the_o great_a courtesy_n of_o this_o friend_n towards_o we_o and_o not_o able_a to_o number_v he_o among_o thy_o flock_n we_o shall_v have_v be_v torment_v with_o too_o disconsolate_a a_o sorrow_n thanks_o be_v to_o thou_o our_o god_n thy_o care_n we_o be_v all_o thy_o exhortation_n and_o thy_o consolation_n sufficient_o show_v it_o faithful_a in_o all_o thy_o promise_n thou_o shall_v return_v to_o verecundus_n for_o that_o his_o house_n at_o cassiacum_n where_o from_o the_o tumult_n of_o the_o world_n we_o quiet_o repose_v in_o thou_o i._o psal_n 68.15_o 16._o vulg._n in_o in_o monte_fw-fr incascato_fw-la monte_fw-fr tuo_fw-la monte_fw-fr ube_fw-mi i._o the_o amenity_n of_o thy_o eternally-green_a and_o flourish_a paradise_n because_o thou_o have_v remit_v unto_o he_o his_o sin_n here_o on_o earth_n in_o the_o mountain_n of_o fat_a pasture_n the_o hill_n of_o god_n that_o fruitful_a hill_n thus_o be_v verecundus_n afflict_v but_o nebridius_fw-la as_o much_o joy_v for_o although_o he_o not_o as_o yet_o a_o christian_a have_v former_o fall_v into_o the_o pit_n of_o that_o most_o pernicious_a error_n to_o believe_v the_o flesh_n of_o thy_o son_n only_o a_o empty_a apparition_n yet_o now_o reclaim_v from_o it_o he_o be_v a_o most_o earnest_a inq_fw-fr isitor_n of_o truth_n though_o not_o as_o yet_o initiate_v in_o any_o sacrament_n of_o thy_o church_n who_o become_v also_o not_o long_o after_o our_o conversion_n and_o regeneration_n by_o thy_o baptism_n a_o faithful_a catholic_n and_o serve_v thou_o in_o all_o continency_n and_o chastity_n among_o his_o kindred_n in_o afri_fw-la k_n and_o have_v convert_v all_o his_o family_n to_o christianity_n thou_o have_v loose_v from_o the_o flesh_n and_o now_o he_o live_v unto_o thou_o in_o abraham_n bosom_n whatever_o it_o be_v that_o be_v signify_v by_o that_o bosom_n there_o my_o nebridius_fw-la life_n my_o sweet_a friend_n and_o thy_o adopt_a son_n there_o he_o live_v for_o what_o other_o place_n can_v receive_v such_o a_o soul_n in_o that_o place_n he_o live_v concern_v which_o he_o ask_v of_o i_o a_o poor_a unexperienced_a man_n so_o many_o question_n he_o now_o lay_v his_o ear_n no_o more_o to_o my_o mouth_n but_o his_o spiritual_a mouth_n to_o thy_o fountain_n and_o there_o drink_v wisdom_n to_o his_o fill_n endless_o happy_a yet_o can_v i_o imagine_v he_o so_o inebriate_v therewith_o that_o he_o forget_v i_o since_o thou_o also_o o_o lord_n who_o he_o drink_v be_v mindful_a of_o i_o thus_o therefore_o it_o be_v with_o we_o at_o that_o time_n we_o comfort_v verecundus_n much_o grieve_v yet_o without_o diminution_n of_o friendship_n for_o such_o our_o conversion_n and_o *_o exhort_v he_o to_o a_o profession_n of_o the_o faith_n suit_v with_o his_o condition_n namely_o with_o a_o marry_a life_n and_o *_o attend_v for_o nebridius_fw-la when_o he_o will_v run_v the_o same_o course_n of_o life_n with_o we_o which_o he_o may_v present_o and_o be_v upon_o the_o point_n to_o do_v it_o every_o moment_n when_o behold_v those_o day_n be_v at_o last_o run_v out_o which_o seem_v so_o long_o and_o many_o from_o the_o affection_n i_o have_v of_o a_o vacant_a liberty_n that_o i_o may_v sing_v from_o the_o innermost_a marrow_n of_o my_o soul_n tibi_fw-la dixit_fw-la cor_fw-la meum_fw-la 27.2_o psal_n 27.2_o my_o heart_n have_v say_v unto_o thou_o i_o have_v seek_v thy_o face_n and_o thy_o face_n o_o lord_n will_v i_o seek_v chap._n iu._n his_o retire_n in_o the_o vacation_n after_o his_o school_n dissolve_v to_o the_o countryhouse_n of_o verecundus_n his_o meditation_n on_o the_o four_o psalm_n and_o his_o several_a writing_n there_o and_o the_o miraculous_a cure_n of_o his_o violent_a toothache_n after_o he_o be_v render_v thereby_o speechless_a and_o now_o be_v the_o day_n come_v wherein_o i_o shall_v actual_o be_v release_v from_o my_o professorship_n in_o rhetoric_n from_o which_o i_o be_v release_v before_o in_o affection_n and_o it_o be_v do_v and_o thou_o now_o free_v my_o tongue_n from_o what_o thou_o have_v before_o free_v my_o heart_n and_o i_o bless_v thou_o with_o much_o rejoice_v and_o so_o retire_v to_o the_o country_n villa_n cassiacum_n villa_n at_o cassiacum_n with_o all_o my_o near_a friend_n where_o *_o what_o i_o do_v in_o my_o writing_n now_o
innermost_a part_n of_o my_o soul_n and_o *_o to_n i_o know_v not_o what_o sweetness_n which_o be_v it_o once_o perfect_v in_o i_o i_o know_v not_o what_o bliss_n that_o be_v which_o such_o a_o life_n will_v not_o enjoy_v but_o then_o with_o certain_a cumbersome_a weight_n hang_v upon_o i_o i_o present_o be_o press_v down_o again_o to_o these_o thing_n below_o and_o be_o re-ingulfed_n and_o detain_v by_o former_a custom_n and_o much_o i_o bewail_v myself_o and_o yet_o much_o still_o i_o be_o detain_v so_o great_o have_v the_o burden_n of_o a_o bad_a custom_n overload_v i_o and_o in_o this_o estate_n i_o can_v abide_v still_o but_o will_v not_o and_o in_o the_o other_o i_o will_v willing_o abide_v but_o can_v both_o way_n very_o miserable_a chap._n xli_o and_o in_o this_o condition_n i_o proceed_v to_o consider_v the_o remain_a languor_n of_o my_o sin_n in_o a_o threefold_a concupiscence_n and_o have_v invoke_v the_o help_n of_o thy_o right_a hand_n to_o deliver_v i_o for_o i_o behold_v thy_o brightness_n with_o a_o sick_a and_o wound_a spirit_n and_o beat_v back_o and_o dazzle_v by_o it_o i_o say_v who_o can_v ever_o attain_v thither_o i_o be_o utter_o cast_v away_o from_o the_o sight_n of_o thy_o eye_n thou_o be_v the_o truth_n who_o preside_v above_o all_o thing_n and_o i_o out_o of_o my_o covetousness_n be_v not_o willing_a to_o loose_v thou_o but_o yet_o greedy_o desire_v also_o to_o possess_v what_o be_v a_o lie_n together_o with_o thou_o as_o no_o man_n desire_v so_o to_o speak_v lie_n as_o to_o be_v ignorant_a what_o be_v truth_n and_o therefore_o i_o lose_v thou_o because_o thou_o vouchsafe_v not_o to_o be_v enjoy_v together_o with_o a_o lie_n chap._n xlii_o his_o recourse_n for_o a_o remedy_n to_o all_o these_o his_o malady_n not_o *_o to_o evil_a angel_n or_o demon_n with_o the_o platonist_n or_o other_o practise_v evil_a art_n as_o mediator_n between_o god_n and_o man_n because_o sinner_n like_o man_n spirit_n like_o god_n and_o now_o who_o can_v i_o find_v who_o may_v reconcile_v and_o reduce_v i_o unto_o thou_o be_v that_o office_n to_o be_v undertake_v by_o some_o angel_n for_o i_o upon_o what_o devotion_n upon_o what_o sacrament_n perform_v unto_o he_o many_o endeavour_v to_o return_v unto_o thou_o and_o of_o themselves_o unable_a as_o i_o hear_v have_v attempt_v such_o way_n and_o fall_v into_o the_o desire_n of_o curious_a vision_n and_o so_o deserve_v to_o be_v expose_v to_o many_o delusion_n for_o be_v high-minded_a they_o seek_v thou_o with_o the_o pride_n of_o learning_n exalt_v rather_o than_o beat_v their_o swell_a breast_n and_o so_o have_v allure_v unto_o rhem_n from_o the_o likeness_n of_o their_o affection_n spirit_n associate_v with_o they_o in_o pride_n 2._o eph._n 2_o 2._o the_o power_n of_o this_o air_n by_o who_o through_o magical_a operation_n they_o may_v be_v deceive_v whilst_o they_o be_v seek_v a_o mediator_n by_o who_o they_o may_v be_v purge_v but_o it_o be_v none_o such_o they_o light_v on_o 14_o 2_o cor._n 11_o 14_o but_o the_o devil_n it_o be_v transform_v himself_o as_o a_o angel_n of_o light_n and_o this_o much_o allure_v proud_a flesh_n to_o repair_v unto_o he_o because_o he_o have_v no_o body_n of_o flesh_n for_o they_o be_v mortal_n and_o sinner_n and_o thou_o o_o lord_n with_o who_o they_o seek_v reconciliation_n be_v sinless_a and_o immmortal_a now_o the_o mediate_a person_n between_o god_n and_o man_n it_o be_v meet_v he_o shall_v have_v something_o like_a to_o god_n something_o like_o to_o man_n lest_z in_o both_o like_a to_o man_n he_o shall_v be_v at_o too_o great_a a_o distance_n from_o god_n or_o in_o both_o like_a to_o god_n he_o shall_v stand_v too_o remote_a from_o man_n therefore_o also_o this_o counterfeit_a mediator_n by_o who_o according_a to_o thy_o secret_a judgement_n our_o pride_n deserve_v to_o be_v delude_v have_v one_o thing_n common_a with_o man_n that_o be_v sin_n and_o will_v seem_v to_o have_v the_o other_o thing_n common_a with_o god_n whilst_o not_o clothe_v with_o the_o mortality_n of_o flesh_n he_o vaunt_v himself_o as_o immortal_a 6.23_o rom._n 6.23_o but_o since_o the_o certain_a wage_n of_o sin_n be_v death_n and_o this_o sin_n he_o have_v common_a with_o man_n he_o have_v also_o that_o common_a with_o man_n to_o be_v sentence_v unto_o death_n chap._n xliii_o but_o *_o to_o christ_n who_o be_v the_o only_a true_a mediator_n mortal_a like_o man_n righteous_a like_o god_n through_o who_o else_o desperate_a he_o confident_o hope_v a_o perfect_a cure_n of_o all_o his_o disease_n but_o the_o true_a mediator_n who_o in_o thy_o secret_a mercy_n thou_o have_v manifest_v to_o the_o humble_a and_o haste_v also_o send_v he_o among_o they_o 2.5_o 1._o tim._n 2.5_o that_o they_o may_v by_o his_o example_n learn_v humility_n that_o mediator_n of_o god_n and_o man_n the_o man_n christ_n jesus_n between_o these_o mortal_a sinner_n and_o the_o immortal_a righteous_a one_o have_v appear_v mortal_a together_o with_o man_n righteous_a together_o with_o god_n that_o because_o the_o wage_n of_o righteousness_n be_v life_n and_o peace_n he_o by_o his_o righteousness_n which_o be_v ally_v to_o god_n may_v evacuate_v death_n to_o justify_v sinner_n which_o death_n he_o be_v please_v to_o have_v common_a with_o man_n and_o this_o true_a mediator_n be_v also_o make_v know_v to_o the_o saint_n of_o old_a that_o they_o by_o the_o faith_n of_o his_o passion_n to_o come_v as_o we_o by_o the_o faith_n of_o it_o past_a may_v attain_v salvation_n and_o it_o be_v as_o he_o be_v man_n that_o he_o be_v mediator_n but_o as_o he_o be_v the_o word_n so_o he_o be_v no_o middling_a person_n because_o equal_a to_o god_n and_o god_n with_o god_n and_o 1.1_o phil._n 2.6_o joh._n 1.1_o together_o with_o the_o holy_a spirit_n one_o god_n how_o far_o have_v thou_o love_v we_o o_o thou_o good_a father_n who_o sparedst_v not_o thy_o only_a son_n but_o deliver_v he_o up_o for_o we_o ungodly_a how_o far_o have_v thou_o love_v we_o for_o who_o he_o 8._o rom._n 8.52_o phil._n 2.6_o 8._o who_o think_v it_o no_o robbery_n to_o be_v equal_a to_o thou_o be_v make_v subject_a even_o to_o death_n even_o to_o the_o death_n of_o the_o cross_n only_o he_o free_a among_o the_o dead_a have_v power_n to_o lay_v down_o his_o life_n 10.18_o john_n 10.18_o and_o power_n likewise_o to_o take_v it_o up_o again_o become_v unto_o thou_o for_o we_o both_o a_o victor_n and_o a_o victim_n and_o therefore_o a_o victor_n because_o he_o have_v be_v a_o victim_n become_v unto_o thou_o for_o we_o both_o the_o priest_n and_o the_o sacrifice_n and_o therefore_o the_o priest_n because_o a_o sacrifice_n make_v we_o unto_o thou_o of_o servant_n son_n by_o be_v bear_v thy_o son_n and_o become_v our_o servant_n and_o therefore_o do_v i_o just_o repose_v strong_a hope_n in_o he_o that_o thou_o will_v heal_v all_o my_o disease_n by_o he_o who_o sit_v at_o thy_o right_a hand_n and_o intercede_v unto_o thou_o for_o we_o else_o shall_v i_o despair_v for_o many_o and_o great_a be_v these_o my_o disease_n many_o and_o great_a they_o be_v but_o great_a be_v the_o cure_n which_o thou_o have_v provide_v and_o well_o may_v we_o have_v imagine_v thy_o word_n to_o have_v be_v too_o remote_a from_o have_v any_o alliance_n with_o we_o and_o so_o have_v despair_v of_o ourselves_o have_v it_o not_o thus_o be_v make_v flesh_n and_o dwell_v among_o we_o affright_v with_o these_o my_o sin_n and_o with_o the_o load_n of_o my_o misery_n i_o have_v once_o a_o thought_n and_o a_o design_n of_o retire_v myself_o into_o some_o desert_n solitude_n but_o thou_o do_v prohibit_v it_o unto_o i_o and_o confirm_v i_o say_v that_o therefore_o christ_n die_v for_o all_o 5.15_o 2_o cor._n 5.15_o that_o they_o who_o live_v shall_v not_o henceforth_o live_v unto_o themselves_o but_o unto_o he_o who_o die_v for_o they_o behold_v o_o lord_n i_o cast_v all_o my_o care_n upon_o thou_o let_v i_o live_v and_o i_o will_v consider_v the_o wonderful_a thing_n of_o thy_o law_n 119.18_o psal_n 119.18_o thou_o know_v my_o ignorance_n my_o infirmity_n teach_v i_o heal_n i_o he_o thy_o only_a one_o in_o who_o be_v hide_v all_o the_o treasure_n of_o wisdom_n and_o knowledge_n redeem_v i_o with_o his_o own_o blood_n let_v not_o the_o proud_a my_o spiritual_a enemy_n false_o accuse_v i_o for_o i_o meditate_v on_o this_o my_o ransom_n 2.3_o col._n 2.3_o and_o i_o eat_v it_o and_o drink_v it_o and_o communicate_v it_o to_o other_o and_o be_v poor_a i_o desire_v to_o be_v satisfy_v therewith_o among_o those_o who_o eat_v and_o be_v satisfy_v and_o they_o shall_v praise_v the_o lord_n that_o seek_v he_o chap._n xliv_o the_o end_n and_o purpose_n of_o these_o his_o confession_n o_o lord_n since_o thou_o be_v eternal_o be_v thou_o ignorant_a o_o these_o thing_n i_o now_o say_v unto_o thou_o or_o see_v thou_o no_o till_o a_o certain_a time_n what_o be_v do_v in_o time_n why_o then_o have_v i_o order_v a_o narration_n of_o so_o many_o several_a matter_n unto_o thou_o sure_o not_o that_o thou_o shall_v learn_v such_o thing_n from_o i_o but_o only_o that_o i_o may_v the_o more_o excite_v my_o affection_n and_o love_n towards_o thou_o and_o they_o also_o who_o reaâ—_n these_o thing_n that_o we_o may_v all_o say_v together_o magnus_fw-la dominus_fw-la &_o lauâ—abilis_fw-la valde_fw-la great_a be_v the_o lord_n and_o great_o to_o be_v praise_v i_o have_v already_o say_v it_o and_o let_v i_o say_v it_o again_o out_o of_o my_o love_n of_o thy_o love_n to_o i_o it_o be_v that_o i_o do_v this_o as_o also_o we_o continue_v to_o pray_v nevertheless_o that_o the_o truth_n have_v say_v your_o heavenly_a father_n know_v what_o thing_n that_o have_v need_n of_o before_o you_o ask_v he_o 6.8_o mat._n 6.8_o we_o only_o publish_v the_o affection_n we_o have_v towards_o thou_o while_o we_o confess_v to_o theâ—_n our_o misery_n and_o thy_o mercy_n that_o thou_o may_v complete_v our_o freedom_n as_o thou_o have_v already_o begin_v it_o and_o that_o a_o length_n we_o may_v perfect_o cease_v to_o be_v miserable_a in_o ourselves_o and_o may_v arrive_v to_o beatitude_n in_o thou_o because_o thoâ—_n have_v gracious_o call_v we_o that_o we_o shall_v be_v poor_a in_o spirit_n and_o meek_a and_o mournful_a and_o hungry_a and_o thirsty_a after_o righteousness_n and_o merciful_a and_o pure_a in_o heart_n and_o peace_n maker_n see_v i_o have_v rehearse_v before_o thou_o a_o many_o thing_n such_o as_o i_o have_v ability_n and_o such_o as_o i_o have_v also_o a_o will_n to_o relate_v because_o thou_o first_o have_v so_o will_v that_o i_o shall_v confess_v unto_o thou_o 118.1_o psal_n 118.1_o the_o lord_n my_o god_n because_o that_o thou_o arâ—_n good_a and_o thy_o mercy_n endure_v for_o ever_o finis_fw-la