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A66701 The new help to discourse or, Wit, mirth, and jollity. intermixt with more serious matters consisting of pleasant astrological, astronomical, philosophical, grammatical, physical, chyrurgical, historical, moral, and poetical questions and answers. As also histories, poems, songs, epitaphs, epigrams, anagrams, acrosticks, riddles, jests, poesies, complements, &c. With several other varieties intermixt; together with The countrey-man's guide; containing directions for the true knowledge of several matters concerning astronomy and husbandry, in a more plain and easie method than any yet extant. By W. W. gent. Winstanley, William, 1628?-1698.; Winstanley, William, 1628?-1698. Country-man's guide. aut. 1680 (1680) Wing W3070; ESTC R222284 116,837 246

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fate Perceiving near worn out would needs translate 'T was a good thrifty soul and time hath bin He would well liquor'd wade through thick and thin But now hee 's gone 't is all that can be said Honest John Cobler is here-under-laid On John Taylor the water-Poet HEre lies the VVater-poet honest John VVho rowed on the streams of Helicon VVhere having many Rocks and dangers past He at the Haven of Heaven arriv'd at last On a Man and his Wife buried together REader cease thy pace and stay Hearken unto what we say As you are such once were we As we are such shall you be Then provide whilst time ye have To come Godly unto your grave An ancient Epitaph on an Earl of Devonshire HOstay who lies here I the good Earl of Devonshire And Mand my VVife that lov'd full dear VVe lived LXV year VVhat we spent we had VVhat we gave we have VVhat we lent we lost On John Lilburn UNtimely cause so late and late because To some much mischief it no sooner was ●s John departed and is Lilburn gone Farewel to both to Lilburn and to John Yet being dead take this advice from me Let them not both in one Grave buried be Lay John here and Lilburn thereabout For if they both should meet they would fall out On Hugh Peters HEre lies the first and last edition Of Hugh the Teacher of Sedition VVhose fatal thread that thread of Life VVas cut in two by Squire Dun's Knife His Iests and Drols could not him save To go untimely to his Grave Mean time Tyburn felt the loss That he was hanged at Charing-Cross On VVilliam Summers King Henry the Eights Jester STay Traveller guess who lies here I tell the neither Lord nor Peer ●o Knight no Gentleman of note ●hat boasts him of his ancient Coat VVhich Heralds curiously emblazon For men well skill'd therein to gaze on ●now then that this was no such man ●nd I 'le express him as I can He that beneath this Tomb-stone lies ●ome call'd fool some held him wise ●or which who better proof can bring ●hen to be favour'd by a King ●nd yet again we may misdoubt him A King hath alwaies fools about him Is he more Idiot than the rest Who in a guarded coat can jest Or can he wisdoms honor gain That is all bravery and no brain Since no such things wit truly bred I' th' habit lies not but i' th' head But whether he was Fool or Knave He now lies sleeping in his Grave Who never in his life found match Unless the Cardinals fool call'd Patch Of whom some Courtiers who did see Them two alone might say We three And 't may be fear'd it is a phrase That may be used still in these days VVell more of him what should I say Both fools and wise men turn to clay And this is all we have to trust That there 's no difference in their dust Rest quiet then beneath this stone To whom late Archy was a drone Stultorum plenasunt omnia On Hobson the merry Londoner HEre Hobson the merry Londoner do● lie And if that you would know the reas●● wh● It was because when as his Jests grew dry He thereupon took pet and so did die On a very fat Man UNder this same stone Here fast sleepeth one And that is not two Yet was without doubt Far bigger about Than both I and you His Kidneys encreast So much that his Waste Was hooped all round But his Girdle Death cuts And down fell his Guts 'Bout his heels to the ground On an Usurer HEre lies at least ten in the hundred Shackled up both hands and feet That at such as lent Money gratis wonder'd The gain of Usury was so sweet But thus being now of life bereaven 'T is a hundred to ten he 's scarce gone to Heaven On a Miller DEath without question was as bold as brief When he kill'd two in one Miller and thief On a Taylor who dyed of a Stitch. Here Stich the Taylor in his grave doth lye Who by a Stich did live and by it dye On Death THe death of all men is the total sum The Period unto which we all must come He lives but a short life that lives the longest And he is weak in death in life was strongest Our life 's like Cobwebs be we ne're so gay And death the Broom which sweeps us all away RIDDLES or dark Propositions ' oftentimes used in Discourse Riddle 1. UNto the Exchange I went some knacks there for to buy Within a Cloyster there was pon't a Monster certainly Feet and hands it had full eight Four eyes clear of sight Four ears whereby to hear And two bodies exceeding clear Kesolution It was an Exchange woman big with Child Riddle 2. I went to the wood and I got it I sat me down and I sought it I kept it still against my will And so by force home I brought it Resolution It was a man that had a thorn in his foot Riddle 3 A Beggar once exceeding poor A penny praid me give him And deeply vow'd nere to ask more And I nere more to give him Next day he beg'd again I gave Yet both of us our oaths did save Resolv He gave him but a penny Riddle 4. Beyond Sea there is an Oak and in that Oak's an Nest and in that Nest an Egg and in that Egg there is a Yolk which calleth together all Christian folk Resolution The Oak is the Church the nest is the Belfrey the Egg is the Bell and the Yolk the Clapper Riddle 5. In thickest Woods I hunt with Beagles ten After the chase which when I do descry I dispossess me of not useful then And what I take not only that keep I. Resolution One scratching his head with both his hands Riddle 6. I went and I went I cannot tell whether I met and I met with I cannot tell who I had a gift given me I shall never forgo and yet I came a true maid home Resolution It is a Child went to be Christened Riddle 7. What is that is as white as snow And yet as black as any Crow And more plyant than a wand Tyed in a silken band And every day a Princes Peer Look on it with a mirth that 's clear Resolution It is a Book tyed with a silken lace Whose paper is as white as snow Ink as black as any Crow And leaves more pliant than any wand Riddle 8. My Coat is green and I can prate Of divers things within my grate In such a prison I am set That hath more Trap-holes than a Net Resolution A Parrot in a Cage of wyre Riddle 9. There was a Bird of great renown Useful in City and in Town None work like unto him can do He 's Yellow Black Red and Green A very pretty Bird I ween Yet he is both fierce and fell I count him wise that can this tell Resolution The painful Bee Riddle 10. I am called by the name of a man
Yet am as little as a mouse When Winter comes I love to be With my red Target near the house Resolution A Robin Red breast Riddle 11. What part of Man may that part be That is an Implement of three And yet a thing of so much stead No woman would without it wed And by which thing or had or lost Each marriage is quite made or crost Resolution The heart of a man a Triangular figure the beginning of Love Riddle 11. Two legs sate upon four legs and eight legs run before in came three legs and upon eight legs fell I count him wise that doth this Riddle tell Resolution It is a Man upon a Horse driving two sheep before him and a Wolf that hath lost one of his legs seizeth the two Sheep Riddle 13. Four and twenty white Buls sat upon a stall Forth came the Red-Bull and over-lickt them all Resolution It is ones Tongue and his Teeth Riddle 14. Learning hath bred me yet I know no letter I have liv'd among books yet am never the better I have eaten up the Muses yet know not a verse What Student is this I pray you rehearse Resolution A Worm bred in a Book Riddle 15. It was not it is not nor never will be Hold up your hand and you shall see Resolution It is the little finger that was not nor is not nor never will be so great as the other fingers Riddle 16. All day like one that 's in disgrace He resteth in some secret place And seldom peepeth forth his head Until Day light be fully fled When in the maids or Good-wives hand The Gallant first had Grace to stand Whence to a hole they him apply Where he will both live and die Resolution A Candle Posies for Rings GOd did decree Our unity Rings and true friends Are without ends We are agreed In time to speed In comely hue None like to you In thy breast My heart doth rest I trust in time Thou wilt be mine Faithful love Can ne're remove No force can move A fixed love 'T is love alone Makes two but one My fancy is Endless as this I seek to be Not thine but thee In thee each part Doth catch a heart My love to thee Like this shall be So decreed And so agreed The love I owe I needs must show As I affect thee So respect me My love for this Deserves a kiss In body two In heart but you As I to thee So wish to me When Cupid fails Thy eye prevails Where hearts agree No strife can be God above Increase our love Heart and hand At your command Where this I give I wish to live Best election Is constant affection Though far apart Yet near in heart Nothing for thee Too dear can be Loves delight Is to unite As I expect so let me find A faithful heart a constant mind The sacred purpose and decree Is manifest in choosing thee My faith is given this Pledge doth show A work from Heaven perform'd below The eye findeth the heart chooseth The hand bindeth and death looseth Wit Wealth and Beauty all do well But constant love doth far excel Fear God and love thou me That is all I crave of thee Be it my fortune or my fault Love makes me venture this assault ACROSTICKS On these words If thou hadst granted I Joy had wanted To a proud rich but deformed Gentlewoman In danger puft you say I prove Fraught with the steam of lust not love Time was you say I priz'd the face High and renown'd as if its grace Ore-past compare but now I seem Urg'd unto wrath to disesteem Honor's attendant unto thy praise And to disrobe thee of thy rays Disgorging thus such surfeits you Sound forth these words I am untrue 'T is true I said three Goddesses Grac'd thy rare parts as like to these Rich Juno was but like a Sow As foul as fat and so art thou Next wisdom was in Pallas but Thou like to her art turn'd a slut Eye-pleasing Venus would admit Delight in bed and you love it Incensed by thy wily mind I thus requite thee in thy kind Ore charg'd with anger venting spleen Yearst to one Fool one Slut one Quean Harbound in one I did compare thee Although truth known I seemed to spare thee Digest me as you please yet know Will ne're did mean what wit did show And though Art taught me to be bold No part I lov'd in thee but Gold Take this from me pray that a fool Espouse thee so thy filth may rule Detain no wise man for thy self No such will love thee but for thy wealth A cross Acrostick on two crost Lovers Though crost in our affections still the flames Of Honor shall secure our noble Names Nor shall our fate divorce our faith or cause The least Mislike of Loves diviner Laws Crosses sometimes are cures Now let us prove That no strength shall Abate the power of Love Honor wit beauty Riches wise men call Frail fortunes Badges In true love lies all Therefore to him we yield our Vows shall be Paid Read and written in Eternity That all may know when men grant no Redress Much love can sweeten the unhappiness Acrostick on Malt Malt is the grain of which we make strong Ale Ale is the liquor that doth make us merry Let but a Toast be put in 't 't will not fail To make the heart light and to sing down derry Another Malt is the grain by which a Fox we gain Ale is the liquor makes our tongues run quicker Let these two boast but the honor of a toast Then sit and tipple 't will your senses cripple Acrostick on time Time with his Sythe brings all to their last home In vain to plead none can withstand his doom Monarchs by Deaths triumphant hand are made Equal i th' grave unto the Sythe and Spade An Acrostick Epitaph on a virtuous Gentlewoman Askest thou Reader who it is lies here No common corps then list and thou shalt hear Goodness rare meekness zeal pure chastity Interr'd together in this ground do lie Behold her acts whilst here she made abode She liv'd belov'd of men dy'd lov'd of God Acrostick on Death Death is the last end of our mortal Race Each hour we spend we thither hie apace A little time it is in life we have Today w' are here tomorrow in our Grave Help us then Lord no aid but thee we crave ANAGRAMS Anagram TOAST A SOTT Exposition A TOAST is like a Sot or what is most Comparative a Sot is like a Toast For when their substances in liquor sink Both properly are said to be in drink Anagram SMOCK MOCKS Exposition Strait-smocks to whoremasters do oft prove Mocks Who thereupon do bann and curse Strait-smocks Anagram ROUND-HEADS HEAVENS ROD. Exposition When Cavaliers by sin offended God The bloody Round-heads were made Heavens Rod. Anagram JOHN TAYLOR Water Poet. LOYAL IN HART Exposition And well he did deserve this Anagram Who was unto his end a Loyal
advised often to meditate upon An. Death Judgment Heaven and Hell to which may be added the death of Christ and the Temptations of the World as one hath neatly couched in these Verses Mors tua Mors Christi Fraus Mundi Gloria Coeli Et dolor inferni sunt meditanda tibi Thy death the death of Christ the world's temptation Heavens joys Hells torment be thy meditation Qu. What was the Sentence according to the opinion of some that Christ wrote with his Finger in the dust of the pavement of the Temple when they brought the Woman before him which was taken in adultery An. Some say it was that which he then spake He that is without fault let him throw the first stone at her Others imagine it to be thus Festucam in oculo fratris cernis trabem in tuo non vides Thou feest the mote in thy Brothers eye but not the beam in thy own But this case is doubtful and for such questions I like the answer of him that said Where the Scripture hath not a Mouth to speak do not thou have a Tongue to ask Qu. In what respect is our Birth and Death compared the one to the other An. In grief and sorrow onely herein is the difference that the first is most painful to our Mothers the last to our selves Qu. What is Life and what is it to Live An. The beginning of mans life is sorrow the end of it sorrow and the middle nothing but grief and sorrow which conjoyns both the middle and end and makes one compleat mass of sorrow of which one writes What joy to live upon the earth can be Where nought but grief and misery we see Hear therefore what old age adviseth youth Young men hear us old men that being young men heard old men and have both by relation and experience found the truth hereof Qu. Which is the best way to overcome wrongs An. By neglecting them according to that of the Poet Wrongs if neglected vanish in short time But heard with anger we confess the crime Qu. How many are they among other Faculties that the whole world is governed by An. Three Divinity Law and Physick as one wittily explains it in this Verse Theologis animum subjecit lapsus Adami Et Corpus Medicis bona Juridicis Our souls our bodies goods by Adams Fall Are to Divines Physicians Lawyers thrall Much to the same purpose is that which an excellent Poet writ concerning our humane Bodies Our bodies are like Shoes which off we cast Physick their Cobler is and Death the last Qu. How many times was that stately Fabrick at Jerusalem built An. Three the first by Solomon in providing the Materials whereof there were thirty thousand Workmen who wrought by the ten thousand a moneth in Lebanon seventy thousand Laborers that bear Burthens eight thousand Quarry-men that hewed in the Mountains and to expedite the business that it should not be according to the Proverb Church-work goes on slowly there were no less than three thousand and three hundred Officers and Overseers What manner of Fabrick this was you may read in the first of Kings the sixth and seventh chapters where it is fully described It was destroyed by Nebuchadnezzar King of Babylon An. Mundi 3350. After the return of the Jews again from the Babylonian Captivity it was re-built but far short of that stateliness and grandeur which it had at first so that the Prophet Haggai had good occasion to say unto the People Who is left among you that saw this House in her first glory is it not in your eyes in comparison of it as nothing Haggai 2. 5. Now besides the stateliness of the building in five other things it was defective for first it wanted the Pot of Manna which the Lord commanded Moses to lay up before the Testimony for a memorial Exod. 6. 22. Secondly the Rod of Aaron which only amongst all the Rods of the Princes of Israel budded and was by God commanded to be kept before the Testimony for a token against the Rebels Corath Dathan and Abiram Num. 17. 10. Thirdly the Ark of the Covenant which was placed in the Sanctum Sanctorum 1 King 6. 19. Fourthly the two Tables of the Law written by Gods own Finger which were by Moses placed in the Ark of the Covenant Exod. 4. 20. And fifthly the Fire of sacrifice which came down from Heaven which Fire was by the Priests to be kept continually burning The third Building thereof was by Herod the Ascalonite who plucked down the second Building and erected it more sumptuous and magnificent than before In this Temple our blessed Saviour and his Apostles preached Salvation to Jew and Gentile so that we may say the glory of this latter Temple exceeded that of the first It was finally destroyed by the Romans under the conduct of Titus the Son of Vespasian according to the words of our Saviour that that generation should not pass away untill they should not see one stone thereof lying upon another Why wonder we then that frail people die When such fair Monuments in ruine lie Qu. Which is accounted the chief Church of all Paris in France An. That of Nostre Dame said to be first founded by St. Saminian afterwards re-edified or rather new built by Philip Augustus Anno 1196. It is a very fair and awful Building adorned with very beautiful Forts and two Towers of especial heighth At your first entrance on the right hand is the Effigies of St. Christopher with our Saviour on his shoulders of a very Gigantick stature It hath in it four ranks of Pillars thirty in rank and forty five little Chappels or Mass-closets built between the outermost range of Pillars and the Walls it is in length one hundred seventy four paces and sixty in breadth and just so many high The two Towers are seventy yards higher than the rest of the Church and is indeed a very beautiful Building yet far short of what our Church of St. Paul in London was when it was in its glory Before such time age made her ruinous Which Reverend Laud sought to revive again And make her to appear fair and gorgeous That she as Queen of all the rest might reign When as at last her glory did expire In that sad fate of London 's dismal Fire Qu. What three English Churches are those that have their several Prerogatives before any other in the Land An. Pauls Westminster and Salisbury Pauls for her Antiquity Westminster for her curious Workman-ship and Sansbury for vatiety of Pillars Windows and Gates Secondly Pauls before the late conflagration of Fire was famous for the continual Society of the Living Westminster is renowned for her Royal Sepulchre of the Dead and Salisbury famous for her Tripartile Calculation of the Year having in it as many Windows Pillars and Gates as there are Days Hours and Moneths in the Year of which Mr. Cambden the famous Antiquary thus writeth Mira canam Soles quot continet
Myrrh as unto a man ready for his sepulchre Three kings to th' King of Kings three Gifts did bring Gold Incense Myrrh as Man as God as King Three Holy Gifts be likwise given by thee To Christ even such as acceptable be For Myrrh tears for Frankincense impart Submissive prayers for pure Gold a pure heart Qu. Wherefore did Pilate wash his hands after he had condemned our Saviour An. Vainly thinking by that Ceremony to wash the blood off from his guilty Conscience O faciles animi qui tristia crimina caedes Fluminea tolli posse putatis aqua Too facile souls which think such heinous matters Can be abolish'd by the River waters We before spoke of the Popes Christening of Bells now we will shew you in what manner it is done The Bell that is to be baptized is so hanged that it may be washed within and without Then in comes the Bishop in his Episcopal Robes attended by one of his Deacons and sitting by the Bell in his Chair saith with a loud voice the 50 53 56 66 69 85 and 12 Psalms or some of them then doth he exercise severally salt and water and having conjured these ingredients into an Holy-water he washeth with it the Bell both on the inside and the outside wiping it dry with a Linnen Cloth he then readeth the 145 146 147 148 149 and 150 Psalms then he draweth a Cross on it with his right thumb dipped in hallowed Oyl Chrisme they call it and then prayeth over it His Prayer finished he wipeth out that Cross and having said over the 48 Psalm he draweth on it with the same Oyl seven other Crosses saying Sanctificetur consecretur Domine Campana ista in nomine c. After another Prayer the Bishop taketh the Censor and putting into it Myrrh and Frankincense setteth it on fire and putteth it under the Bell that it may receive all the fume of it This being done the 76 Psalm read and some other prayers repeated the Bell hath received his whole and entire baptism and is from thenceforth very fit and able to ring out Ding Dong Dong Qu. Who are those that pray for all Defend all Feed all Devour all An. In the representation of an ancient picture it was thus resolved The Pope with his Clergy says I pray for you all The Emperor with his Electors I defend you all The Clown with his sack of Corn I feed you all at ●ast comes Death and says I devour you all For Mors ultima linea rerum Death is a Pursivant with Eagles wings That strikes at poor mens doors and gates of Kings Further Verses upon Death Death is a Fisher-man the world we see His Fish-pond is and we the Fishes be He sometimes Angler-like doth with us play And slily takes us one by one away Diseases are the murthering hooks which he Doth catch us with the bait Mortality Which we poor silly Fish devour till strook At last too late we feel the bitter Hook At other times he brings his Net and then At once sweeps up whole Cities full of men Drawing up thousands at a Draught and saves Onely some few to make the other Graves His Net some raging Pestilence Now he Is not so kind as other Fishers be For if they take one of the smaller Frye They throw him in again he shall not die But Death is sure to kill all he can get And all is fish with him that comes to Net Qu. Why do the affections of Parents run upwards to their Children and not their Childrens un downward to them An. Experience tells us that Parents are more tender and loving to their Children by far than Children are dutiful and obsequious to their Parents Even as the Sap in the Root of a Tree ascends into the Branches thereof but returns not from the branches to the Root again but runs forth from thence into seed so parents love their Children who return not that love to them again but their affections run forwards to a further procreation Hence comes it to pass that one father with more willingness brings up ten children than ten children in his want will sustain one Father And whereas you hear of one unnatural Parent you shall hear of ten disobedient children Qu. Have the Heavens a particular influence upon the same Climate though the Inhabitants be changed An. Yes they have for as these Caelestial bodies considered in the general do work upon all sublunary bodies in the general by light influence and motion so have they a particular operation on particulars An operation there is wrought by them in a man as born at such and such a minute and again as born under such and such a Climate The one derived from the setting of the Houses and the Lord of the Horoscope at the time of his Nativity the other from that Constellation which governeth as it were the Province of his birth and is the Genius or Deus Tutelaris loci Qu. In what Points doth the Greek and Muscovite Church differ from that of the Romesh and the reformed An. In these ten 1. Denying the Holy Ghost to proceed from the Father and the Son 2. Denying Purgatory but praying for the dead 2. Believing that holy men injoy not the presence of God before the Resurrection 4. Communicating in both kinds but using leavened bread and mingling warm water with wine which both together they distribute with a spoon 5. Receiving children of seven years old to the Sacrament because then they begin to sin 6. Forbiding extream Unction Confirmation and fourth Marriages 7. Admitting none to Orders but such as are married and prohibiting marriage to them that are actually in Orders 8. Rejecting carved Images but admiring the painted 9. Observing four Lents in the year And tenthly reputing it unlawful to fast on Saturdays The main points in which the Grecians and Muscovite differ is in this manner of distributing the Sacrament and the exacting of Marriage at the Ordination of Priests Qu. Wherein do the Cholchians differ from other Christians their Neighbours An. In three circumstances 1. In not Baptizing their Children till the eighth year 2. In not entering into Churches till the sixtieth year but hearing Divine Service without the Temple 3. In dedicating their youth to theft and rapine their old Age to the difficult work of Repentance Qu. Whereon do the Jacobites differ from the Greek and Roman Church An. In four several opinions 1. They acknowledge but one Will Nature and operation in Christ 2. They use circumcision in both Sexes 3. They sign their children with the sign of the Cross imprinted with a burning Iron 4. They affirm Angels to consist of two substances fire and light These Jacobites are so called from Jacobus Syrus who lived Anno 530. the Patriarch of this Sect is always called Ignatius he keepeth residence at Garani in Mesopotamia and is said to have 160000 Families under his jurisdiction Qu. Of what Sect are those Christians called Melchites
they would break the back of Simon of Cyrene to carry them but these are pious frauds and so much the more tolerable in that they bring great gain into the Popes Treasury Of the Temple thus built was afterwards instituted an Order of Knights Templers by Hugh of Payennes Anno 1113. and confirmed by Pope Eugenius their Ensign was a red Cross in token that they should shed their blood to defend Christs Temple They were Cross-legged and wore on their backs the figure of the Cross for which they were by the common people called cross-back or crouk-back and by corruption crook-back Edmund Earl of Lancaster second Son to our Henry the third being of this Order was vulgarly called Edmund Crook-back which made Henry the fourth conceited that this Edmund from whom he was descended was indeed the eldest Son of King Henry but that for his crookedness and deformity his younger Brother was preferred to the Crown before him These Knights in process of time grew very rich having in all Provinces of Europe their subordinate Governors in which they did possess no less than 16000 Lordships The House of our Law Students in London called the Temple was the chief House of the Knights of this order in England where at this day some of their Images are to be seen with their legs across as they were here buried amongst whom was William Marshal the Elder a most powerful man in his time William and Gilbert his Sons Marshals of England and Earls of Pembroke upon Willa●m the Elder his Tomb some years since was read in the upper part Comes Pembrochia and on his side this verse Miles eram Martis Mars m●●ltos vic●rit armis This Order which at first was very poor insomuch that their common seal was two riding upon one Horse in little time with insatiable greediness they hoarded up great wealth by withdrawing Tithes from the Church appropriating spiritual things to themselves and other bad means which riches of theirs turned to their ruine for Philip the fair King of France having a plot to invest one of his Sons with the Title of King of Ierusalem procured of the Pope the revenue of this Order which he thought to do the better because Clement the fifth then Pope for the love he bare to France had transferred his seat from Rome to Avignon But though he affected the one he was deceived in the other for this Order being dissolved and many of them cruelly and as it is thought unjustly put to death the Lands thereto belonging were by a general Council given to the Knights Hospitallers of St. John which said Knights of that Order in England whose principal mansion was in Smithfield sold the aforesaid House of the Templers to the Students of Laws for the yearly rent of ten pound about the middle of the Reign of Edward the third in whose hand it is continued unto this day Qu. What four Countreys in England are those which are famoused for four principal qualities An. Staffordshire Darbyshire Cheshire and Lancashire Staffordshire for Beer and Bread Darbyshire for Wool and Lead Cheshire the Chief of Men And Lancashire for fair Women Qu What place in England is accounted most safe in the time of War according as we find it proverbially said An. When as wars are aloft Safe is he that 's at Christ's Croft And where should this Christ's Croft be But betwixt Rible and Mersie Qu. What may be said of these four Latine words Quid Puer Quid Senex An. Take away the first letter from Puer or a Boy and there remains Ver which signifieth the Spring Take two first letters from Senex for an old man and there remaineth Nex which signifieth death and thus are both their natures expressed in both their Names Ver. Nex Ver is the Spring most fragrant fresh and gay Nex is the Night that doth conclude lifes day Qu. What may we think of such as are Jesters to Noblemen or Princes or such as are Jaok-puddings on Mountebanks stages An. That a fool cannot perform the place and none but Fools will undertake it Qu. What Book do not married men love to learn in An. The Horn-book Qu. What be the three properties belonging to a Whore An. Nimble of her hand quick of her tongue and light of her tayl Qu. Whether are Whores or Thieves most prejudicial to a Common-wealth An. Whores by far for Thieves do only steal and purloyn from men and the harm they do is to embellish mens goods and bring them to poverty this is the only end of mens thieving and the prejudice that grows from robbing and filohing but if a man fall into the company of a Whore she flatters him she inveagles him she bewitcheth him that he spareth neither goods nor lands to content her that is onely in love with his coyn If he be married he forsakes his Wife leaves his Children despiseth his friends only to satisfie his lust with the love of a base whore who when he hath spent all upon her and he brought to beggery beateth him out like the prodigal Son and for a small reward brings him if to the fair'st end to beg if to the second to the Gallows or at the last and worst to the Pox or as prejudicial diseases Qu. What is the Art and cunning of a Whore An. Their eyes are Stauls and their hands Lime-twigs Cyrces had never more charms Calipso more inchantments nor the Syrens more subtile tunes than they have crafty sleights to inveagle young Cullies to their deceitful embraces Qu. Who were the most famous whores in former Ages An. Lais Thais Rhodope the Lady Rosamond Jane shore c. nor must we think our present age to be altogether free For thus the Poet on his word engages Whores are in this as well as former ages Qu. What is the Character of an honest Man An. That his Tongue is the Interpreter of his heart though now considering the hypocrisie and falshood of most men we may say with the Poet The tongue was once a servant to the heart And what it gave she freely did impart But now Hypocrisie is grown so strong She makes the heart a servant to the tongue Qu. What is that which of running becomes staid of soft becomes hard of weak becomes strong and of that which is infinite becomes but one An. Ice Qu. Who were the first that brought Tobacco into England An. It was first brought hither by the Mariners of Sir Francis Drake Anno 1585. but brought into more request and custom by Sir Walter Rawleigh who is reported to have taken two pipes thereof as he went to execution This Drug as it hath found many friends so hath it met with divers enemies who report it not only consumptive to the purse but that it impaireth the inward parts corrupteth the natural sweetness of the breath stupifieth the brain and is so prejudicial to the general esteem of our Countrey-men that one saith of them Anglorum corpora qui huic
plains come there for refuge and so loose their fleeces or like to the Spiders web in which the little flies are catcht but the great ones break through with ease Qu. Wherein did the old Romans shew the love that they bear unto Virtue An. In erecting a Temple to Honor into which none could come but he must first pass through the Temple of Virtue to signifie that those that trode in the paths of Justice and Virtue should at last be crowned with honor and dignity Qu. What is the reason that women love their ease more than men An. When man lay dead-like woman took her life From a crookt embleme of her nuptial strife And hence her bones would be at rest her ease She loves so well and is so hard to please Qu. Wherein consists the praises of a Country life An. The Countrey-man is thrice happy in this that he plays not with his wings in the golden flames of the Court nor setteth his foot into the busie throngs of the City nor runneth up and down in the intricate mazes of the Law but resting contented in the Winter to sit by a countrey fire and in the Summer to lay his head on the green pillows of the Earth where his sleep is soft slumbers and his waking pleasant as golden dreams His highest ambition is to get up unto the Mountains where he thinks himself a petty King the greatest Trees standing trembling before him to do him reverence which he calleth his Nobles on each side of him he beholdeth ranks of Oaks which he counteth his Guards the Willows that bend at every blast he accounteth his flatterers and the Vallies humbled at his feet he termeth his slaves No Prince in the world keeps more skilful Musicians the Birds are his consort and the wind instruments they play upon yield ten thousand several tunes Thus doth he rest secure whilest he doth lie Too low for Envy and for scorn too high Qu. Who are the most proud and imperious of all others An. Such as have been raised from the Dunghil to some preferment according to that old English Proverb of ours Set a Beggar on Horseback and he will ride to the Devil With which agreeth that of the Poet None looks to be accounted More than a Beggar mounted Qu. What is the difference of valour in several persons An. Some are truly valarous and those are such who will nobly engage in a just quarrel others are cowardly valorous to which alludeth the Proverb Make a Coward fight and he will kill the Devil and to this purpose we have a story of a Gentleman that kept a Welshman to his man It so fortuned that as they rid abroad they were set on by two thieves The Gentleman defended himself for a good space while his man stood still looking on but offering no help to his master At length the Gentleman having received some wounds was forced to yield and deliver up his money to the thieves but withal requested them that since his man would not fight he yet might receive some of the blows and therefore desired them to give him three or four good stroakes over the back this was no sooner desired but as readily granted and as soon performed But Taffy feeling the smart of the blows his welsh blood was soon up he thunders lightning and revenge upon them soon disarms one of the thieves and with his sword deeply wounds the other so that in a little space they both became the objects of his mercy the money they received is re-delivered and upon their knees they ask pardon The third are such as are only valiant in their drink of which last the Poet thus writes Qu. Who onlie in his Cups will fight is like A Clock that must be oyl'd well e're it strike Qu. How many veins are there in the body of a man An. As many as there are days in the year according as it is set down in this verse For that in us all things may vain appear We have a vein for each day in the year Qu. How many bones are there in a perfect man An. 284. which are thus singlely collected i● the head forty nine in the breast sixty seven in the arms and hands sixty one in the fee● sixty in all 284. according to the Poet. The bones which do support our Earthly Tower Are numbered two hundred eighty four Qu. How many teeth hath a man according to the Poets Rule An. Sunt homini dentes triginta duo comedentes The Grinders which in time are said to cease Are numbered thirty two at best increase Qu. Which were the most famous Tyrants in their time An. 1. Nero a Heathen Roman Emperor who commanded Rome to be set on fire and then accused the Christians for doing it he also most unnaturally caused his Mothers belly to be ripped up that he might see the place of his conception 2. Caligula another Roman Emperor who wished that all the people of Rome had but one neck that he might strike it off at a blow 3. Phalaris a Tyrant of Agrigentum in Sicily for whom Perillus made a brazen Bull into which those whom he intended to torture were put a fire being made under it the extremity of the heat causing them to roar out made the brazen statue to bellow like a Bull the Tyrant only just in this causing Perillus to hansel it first himself upon which Ovid thus writes Nec enim lex justior ulla Quam necis Artificis arte perire sua Most just it is a man should be tormented With that which first his cruel wit invented 4. Dionisius a King of the said country of Sicily whose Tyrannies were so odious that there were continual execrations poured on him only one old woman prayed for his life who being asked the cause made answer that she knew his Grand-father to have been bad and after by prayers they had obtained his death his Son succeeded far worse than the Father and after their curses had also prevailed over him came the present Tyrant worse than either for whose life she was resolved to pray lest after his decease the Devil himself should come amongst them Qu. Why do great persons bear themselves up high over their inferiors seeing we are all made of one mould An. Because too much familiarity breeds contempt the Eagle scorns to meddle with the Kite the Lyon with the Mouse to conend with an ignoble enemy is an act inglorious and to conquer them almost as much dishonour as by them to be overcome Qu. Wherefore do the Jews break the Glass in which the Bride and Bridegroom drink An. To admonish them that all things in this world are transitory and brittle as the Glass and therefore they must be moderate in their pleasure and desires Qu. What custom had they of Baeotia in Greece concerning their marriage of the daughters An. When the Bride was carried home to her betrothed Husband they used to burn before the door the Axel-tree of
ground remaining a deep pit August 4. Anno 1584. At the end of the Town call'd Nottingham in Kent eight miles from London the ground began to sink three great Elms being swallowed up and driven into the Earth past mans sight March 17. 1586. A strange thing happened Mr. Dorrington of Spaldwick in the County of Huntington Esquire had a Horse which dyed suddenly and being ripped up to see the cause of his death there was found ●n a hole of the heart of the Horse a Worm of a wondrous form it lay on a round heap ●n a Kall or Skin in the likeness of a Toad which being taken out and spreed abroad was in form and fashion not easie to be described the length of which worm divided into many grains to the number of eighty spread from the body like the branches of a Tree was from the snout to the end of the longest grain seventeen inches having four Issues in the grains from whence dropped forth a red water The body in bigness round about was three inches and a half the colour was very like the colour of a Maycril This monstrous worm crawling about to have got away was stabbed in with a dagger and so died which after being dryed was shown to many persons of account for a great rarity Sunday December 5. in the thirty eighth year of Queen Elizabeths Reign a great number of people being assembled in the Cathedral Church of Wells in Sommersetshire in the Sermon time before noon a sudden darkness fell among them and storm and tempest follow'd after with lightning and thunder such as overthrew to the ground them that were in the body of the Church and all the Church seemed to be on a ligat fire a loathsome stench followed some stones were stricken out of the Bell-Tower the Wyers and Irons of the Clock were melted which tempest being ceased and the people come again to themselves some of them were found to be marked with strange figures on their bodies and their garments not perished nor any marked that were in the Chancel How daily ought we then for to pray thus From Lightning and Tempest Lord deliver us Anno 1604. in the Reign of King James John Lepton of Kepwick in the county of York Esquire a Gentleman of an ancient Family and of good reputation his Majesties Servant and one of the Grooms of his most honourable privy Chamber performed so memorable a journey as deserves to be recorded to future ages because many Gentlemen who were good Horse-men and divers Physicians did affirm it was impossible for him to do without apparent danger of his life He undertook to ride five several times betwixt London and York in six dayes to be taken in one week betwixt Munday morning and Saturday night He began his journey upon munday being the 26 of May in the year aoresaid betwixt two and three of the Clock n● the morning forth of Saint Martins near Aldersgate within the City of London and came to York the same day betwixt the hours of five and six in the afternoon where he rested that night The next morning being Tuesday about three of the clock he took his journey forth of York and came to his lodging in Saint Martins aforesaid betwixt the hours of six and seven in the afternoon where he rested that night The next morning being Wednesday betwixt two and three of the clock he took his journey forth of London and came into York about seven of the clock the same day where he rested that night the next morning being Thursday betwixt two and three of the Clock he took his journey forth of York and came to London the same day betwixt seven and eight of the clock where he rested that night the next morning being Fryday betwixt two and three of the clock he ●ook his journey towards York and came thither the same day betwixt the hours of seven and eight in the afternoon so as he finished his appointed journey to the admiration of all men in five days according to his promise and upon Munday the seven and twentieth of the same Moneth he went from York and came to the Court at Greenwich upon Tuesday the 28. to his Majesty in as fresh and cheerful manner as when he first began Anno 1608. in the fifth year of King James upon the 19. of February when it should have been low water at London-Bridge quite contrary to course it was then high water and presently it ebbed almost half an hour the quantity of a foot and then suddenly it flowed again almost two foot higher than it did before and then ebbed again until it came to its course almost as it was at first so that the next flood began in a manner as it should and kept its due course in all respects as if there had been no shifting nor alteration of Tydes all this happened before twelve a clock in the forenoon the water being indifferent calm And now we are come to our own memory viz. the Reign of King Charles the First in which we find that there was a Fish taken and sold in Cambridge Market which had in its belly a book of an ancient print part whereof was consumed but enough left to be legibly read as you may find in Mr. Hammond Lestrange his History of King Charles the first The wonder of his time old Thomas Parre a Shropshire man who attained to the age of 152 years and odd months being afterwards brought up to the Court as a miracle of nature but having changed his air and dyet he soon after dyed and was buried in Westminster Abbey The Woman at Oxford which was condemned upon a supposed crime having hanged a good space and being by the Soldiers knockt divers times on the breast with the but-end of their Muskets to put her the sooner out of her pain yet afterwards when she was cut down and ready to be Anatomized there was life perceived in her and by applying some things unto her she recover'd her memory and senses was afterwards found guiltless of the fact married and had three or four children June the second Anno 1657. a Whale of a prodigious bulk being sixty foot in length and of a proportionable bigness was cast on shore not far from Green-wich which was lookt upon to be a great presage of some wonderful matters soon after to ensue and indeed the event proved it to be true for not long after Cromwel full sore against his will in a great wind was hurryed away into another World The last but not the least wonder is of one Martha Taylor hear to Packwel in Darbyshire who from Saint Thomas day in the year ● four Lord 1667. to the present writing hereof being the 11. day of January 1668. hath not asted any sustenance in all that time she ●s still living and audible to be heard but more like an anatomy or Picture of death than ● living creature Qu. What other wonders are there to be
Earldoms of Guyen and Poictou by Elbiner his wife and a great part of Ireland by conquest towards the latter end of his Reign he was much troubled with the unnatural Rebellion of his Sons He dyed the sixth day of July Anno 1189. and Reigned twenty four years and seven months lacking eleven days Richard the first for his valor and magnanimous courage sirnamed Coeur de Lion he with a most puissant Army warred in the Holy-Land where by his acts he made his name very famous overcoming the Turks in several Battels whom he had almost driven out of Syria he also took the Isle of Cyprus which he afterwards exchanged for the Title of King of Jerusalem after many worthy atchievements performed in those Eastern parts returning homewards to defend Normandy and Aquitain against the French he was by a Tempest cast upon the Coast of Austria where he was taken prisoner and put to a most grievous Ransom finally he was slain at the siege of Chaluz in France by a shot from an Arbalist the use of which warlike Engine he first shewed to the French whereupon a French Poet made these Verses in the person of Antropos Hoc volo non alia Richardum marte perire Ut qui Francigenis Balistae primitus usum Tradidit ipse sui rem primitus experiatur Quamque aliis docuit in se enim sentiat artis It is decreed thus must great Richard die As he that first did teach the French to dart An Arbalist 't is just he first should try The strength and taste the Fruits of his own Art In his days lived those Outlaws Robin Hood Little John c. King John next succeeded or rather usurped the Crown his eldest Brothers Son Arthur of Britain being then living He was an unnatural Son to his Father and an undutiful subject to his Brother neither sped he better in his own Reign the French having almost gotten his Kingdom from him who on the Popes curse came to subdue it with whom joyned many of his Subjects by which the Land was brought to much misery Finally after a base submission to the Popes Legat he was poysoned by a Monk at Sw●nested-Abby after he had reigned seventeen years and five months lacking eight days and lyeth buried at Worcester Henry the third Son to King John against whom the rebellious Barons strongly warred yet however he expelled the intruding French out of England confirmed the Statutes of Magna Charta and having reigned fifty six years and twenty eight days was buried at Westminster of which Church he built a great part Edward the first sirnamed Long-shanks who warred in the Holy-Land where he was at the time of his Fathers death a most Heroick magnanimous Prince he awed France subdued Wales and brought Scotland into subjection disposing of the Crown thereof according to his pleasure he brought from thence the Regal Chair still reserved in Westminster-Abby he was a right vertuous and fortunate Prince Reigned thirty four years seven months and odd days and lyeth buried at Westminster Edward the second a most dissolute Prince hated of his Nobles and contemned by the vulgar for his immeasurable love to Pierce Gaveston and the two Spencers on whom he bestowed most of what his Father had purchased with his Sword as one writeth in these Verses Did Longshanks purchase with his conquering hand Albania Gascoyn Cambria Ireland That young Carnarvon his unhappy Son Should give away all that his Father won He having Reigned nineteen years six months and odd days was deposed and Edward his eldest Son Crowned King Edward the third that true pattern of vertue and valor was like a rose out of a Bryar an excellent Son of an evil Father he brought the Scots again to a formal obedience who had gained much on the English in his Fathers life time laid claim to the Crown of France in right of his Mother and in pursuance of his Title gave the French two great overthrows taking their King prisoner with divers others of the chief Nobility he took also that strong and almost impregnable Town of Callice with many other fair possessions in that Kingdom Reigned fifty years four months and odd days and was buried at Westminster Richard the second Son to Edward the black Prince the eldest Son of King Edward the third an ungovern'd and dissolute King He rejected the sage advice of his Grave Counsellors was most ruled by his own self-will'd passions lost what his Father and Grand-father had gained and at last his own life to the Lancastrian faction in his time was that famous or rather infamous rebellion of Wat Taylor and Jack Straw He having Reigned twenty two years three months and odd days was deposed and murdered at Pomfret Castle Henry the fourth Son to John of Gaunt Duke of Lancaster third Son to Edward the third obtained the Crown more by force than by lawful succession he was a wise prudent Prince but having gotten the Crown unjustly was much troubled with insurrection of of the subjects which he having quieted surrendred to fate having reigned thirteen years six months and odd days and was buried at Canterbury Henry the fifth who from a dissolute vicious Prince became the mirror of Kings and pattern of all Heroick performance he pursued his Title to the Crown of France bear the French at Agin Court and was in a Parliament of their Nobility Clergy and Commons ordained Heir apparent to the French Crown but lived not to possess it dying in the full carrier of his victories at Vincent Boys in France and was brought over into England and buried at Westminster He Reigned nine years five months and odd days Henry the sixth sirnamed of Windsor his birth-place of whom it was prophesied that What Henry of Monmouth had won which was his Father Henry of Windsor should lose He was a very pious Prince and upheld his State during the life of his Unkles John Duke of Bedford and Humphrey of Glocester after whose deaths the Nobility growing factious he not only lost France to the French but England and his life to the Yorkish faction He having reigned thirty eight years was overthrown by Edward Earl of March descended by the Mothers side from Lionel Duke of Clarence second Son to King Edward the third was arrested and sent to the Tower where within a while after he was murdered and buried at Cherlsey since removed to Windsor Edward the fourth a prudent politick Prince He after nine bloody Battels especially that of Tawton in which were slain of the English thirty six thousand on both sides was at last quietly seated in his dominions of England and Ireland Reigned twenty two years one month and odd days and was buried at Windsor Edward the fifth his Son a King proclaimed but before his Coronation was murdered in the Tower Richard the third brother to Edward the fourth was Crowned King ascending to the same by steps of blood murdering King Henry the sixth and Prince Edward his Son 3.