that hope in him for no deceit no snare or allurement shall be able to deject the mind relying on God through hope or overcome him persevering Now let humane despaire be ashamed and cursed be the feare of cowardlinesse which beleiveth that he can deny or withhold his benefits from them being rich and very liberall to all those that call upon him and put their perfect hope in him For hath not the eternall Father in whom there is no change of his sole exceeding great bounty sent his only begotten Son in whom he hath given all that he had all that he wold all that he was So that if his liberality should now diminish his infinite goodness perhaps our infirmity and weaknesse not unworthily would stagger But because he is good of himselfe and not by any accidentall good he is not by the communication of his goodnesse diminished nor by Addition of any others goodness augmented MAN O my soule Great is thy faith thou art very strong in hope and confidence And although the hope which proceeds from the promise of God and a holy life and conversation be worthy of praise and ought to be eternised yet truely I councell thee before thou scendest to get Inebriation into thee that thou first wholesomely descend below thy selfe by the consideration of thy selfe that thou mayest learne reverently to feare thy Spouse before that thou beginnest to enter into his secret Bed-chamber whom thou oughtest not only to feare when he is angry but also when he doth most sweetly and delicately cherish thee The end of the second part The third Exercise How the Soule by mentall Exercise ought to convert the beames of Contemplation to things below her that shee may understand 1 The Inevitable necessity of mans death 2 The Formidable austerity of finall Judgment 3 The Intollerable paine of Infernall punishment CHAP. I. Of the Inevitable necessity of Mans death SOVLE TEll me I pray thee O man what are those Inferiour things to which my consideration is to be converted I hasten to ascend I seek Inebriation of the divine comfort I am not able long to rest on those things which are below me Even now I desire O Lord my helper thy beloved Tabernacles I covet with all my strength to dwell in the Courts of our Lord. MAN THese are the Inferiour things O my Soul that thou mayst convert thy selfe unto and may see the inevitable necessity of Death and mayst lament all the infallible equity and truth of the Divine Judge and mayst tremble and be afraid of the intollerable austerity of infernall punishment Consider therefore often weigh and revolve diligently that death cannot be avoided that the hour of death cannot be discovered that the time pre-ordained of God cannot be altered Isidorus In humane things nothing is more certain then death nothing more uncertain then the hour of death it hath not any pity on Poverty it is not afraid of power it respecteth not the excellency of manners or kindred it spareth not youth or age it is at the old mans gate and at the young mans heels SOVLE I Understand that our life is nothing else but a passage to death Why then are temporall things loved which for such an uncertain time are possessed Why desire we this life to continue so long wherin by how much the longer we live by so much the more we sin by how much our life is prolonged by so much the more numerous is our transgression for daily evills encrease and good things are diminished For who is able to consider how many evills wee commit in a moment of time or how many good things we neglect For truely it is a great sinne when wee neither do good nor think of good but suffer our mind to wander after vain and unprofitable things MAN AS St. Gregory saith Carnall minds O my Soul for that cause love temporall pleasures because they consider not how fleeting this life is For if they should but look into the swiftness of the passage thereof truely they would not affect this so little enduring a prosperity My life is like to one sailing for whether I sleep or watch I am still hastning to my end O present life how many dost thou deceive which whilest thou flyest art nothing when thou art seen but a shadow when exalted but a fume to fools pleasant to wise men bitter they that love thee know thee not they that fly thee onely understand thee To some thou promisest thy selfe for a long season that thou mayst deceive them to others for a short time that thou mayst bring them into despair With continuall meditation let us exercise our understanding Author de spiritu Anima and let us consider our miseries With sorrow we entred this life with labour we live therin with fear go out therof St. Bern. How many of us have lived in this Region of the shadow of death in sickness of body in conflict and in the place of tentation if wee diligently take notice therof wee miserably labour with a threefold discommodity For we are easie to be seduced weak to resist and frail to operate SOVLE NOw I see that he lives unprofitably in this world that hastens not to gain that wherby he may live for ever Therfore it should not be any ones care to live long but rather that he may live well Because although it may be granted to any one that he live well yet it is certain that it is not granted to any that he may live long St. Bern. Therefore that is a secure life where the conscience is pure where death is expected without feare or trembling is wished to be at hand with delight and received with devotion MAN O My Soul if thou understandest these things to be so hear my councel and in this life so long as it lasteth prepare for thy self that life which lasteth eternally Whilst thou art in the flesh dy to the World that afterwards thou mayst begin to live in God Understand that there is no one that admitteth death approaching merrily and jocundly but he that hath prepared himself therto by good works whilst he lived give attention to that of Seneca The indiscreet man that is the sinner and the guilty man beginneth his death in dying but the wise man and virtuous overcometh death by death SOVLE O Man J perceive that the death of good men is blessed and the death of Sinners unhappy and miserable MAN O My Soul according to St. Bern. the death of the just man is good in respect of rest better in respect of change the best in respect of security Contrarywise the death of Sinners is most miserable and well may it be termed the worst evil in the loss of the world worse in the separation of the flesh but the worst in the double sorrow and suffering of the Worme and fire and that which is worst of all is in the privation of divine Contemplation CHAP. II. Of the Formidable austerity
fountaine of Eternall light the torrent of true pleasure That it may alwayes desire thee seek thee and may find thee and sweetly rest in thee But what madnesse what infernall furies so long time hath hindred such things and such comforts of my mind such joyes and mellifluous banquets from me Tell me J pray thee O man what is the cause of so great evill what is the reason of so much danger what is the occasion of so great losse MAN I Perceive O my soule that now thou art wearied with labours now vexed with sorrow that thou art not further able to find to whom thou mayst ascribe the great evill brought upon thee J desire therefore that thou wilt heare me with patience if J shall demonstrate to thee the cause of so great a losse if J show thee the Enemy of so great an evill Now somewhat in part thou hast discovered the enemy yet perhaps for greif of mind thou hast not considered that thou hast O my soule a domestick enemy an Enemy that is thy friend an adversary thy Neighbour which hath rendred thee evill for good and under pretence of friendship being thy crueller foe hath deprived thee of all these and many more infinite good things This enemy under favour is thy unhappy and miserable flesh yet very much beloved and pleasant unto thee This when thou hast pampered thou hast raised against thee thy worst enemy This when thou hast honoured thou hast armed against thy self the cruellest adversary This when thou hast adorned with various and pretious Garments thou hast robbed thy self of all internall ornaments knowing not what blessed Saint Gregorie saith in his Homilies From whence saith he the flesh for a time lives sweetly from thence the spirit for ever shal be tormented lament and bewaile And contrarily by how much the more the flesh is oppressed by so much the more the spirit rejoyceth in Heavenly hope Wherefore for so great an injurie offered to us by thee I am not able to containe my self any longer but will reprove so great an evill hitherto in silence dangerously passed over J know saith Saint Bernard a certaine one who for many years hath lived with thee hath sate with thee at Table hath received meat from thy hand and hath slept in thy bosome when she pleased hath had discourse with thee this one by Hereditary right is thy own servant but because thou hast too delicately fed her and hast spared the Rod she hath lifted up her heel against thee and despised thee brought thee into servitude And he further addeth O miserable soule and to be pittied who shall deliver thee from the bond of this disgrace Let God arise and let the armed fall and let the enemy be bruised This enemy J say is the contemner of God the friend of the World the worshipper of Satan What thinkest thou of her if rightly thou conjecturest J beleive thou wilt say with me Shee iâ— guilty of death let her be crucified Do not therefore dissemble do not defer doe not spare crucifie her crucifie her But on what Cross on the Crosse of our Lord Jesus Christ in which there is our health life and resurrection Call to mind therefore O my soule thy first beginnings consider that thou art marked with the Jmage of God adorned with his similitude espoused by faith endowed with hope pre-elected by Charity redeemed with his blood partaker of grace cepable of Beatitude what hast thou to do with flesh that thou sufferest these things if thou diligently weigh its Condition thou hast never seen a viler dunghill If thou wouldest number its miseries how it is laden with sinnes itching with Concupiscences busied with passions polluted with illusions full of confusion and replete with ignominie what other thing hast thou of it but obscene and uncleane thoughts These Saint Bern. O divine soule which art from Heaven blush to be transformed into the similitude of a Swine blush to wallow in the Mire The same Author on the Canticles O my soule so long as thou art in the flesh thou art conversant among thornes and it is necessary that thou greivously suffer the troubles of temptations and the stings of resistance Wherefore it is said to thee in the Canticles As the Lillie amongst Thornes so is my beloved among the Daughters O faire Lillie O tender and delicate flower unbeleiven and subverters are with thee and thou hast thy habitation with Scorpions See therefore how warily it behoveth thee to walk among thorns The flesh and the World are full of thornes to walk among these and not to be hurt is of divine grace and not of humane power These Saint Bernard And there is another strong and cruell enemy which by his wonderfull craft dissolveth the Customes of all breatheth cares searcheth the affections and there alwayes seeketh cause to hurt where he shall observe any one more studiously to be busied For this old Serpent being an enemy of mankind hath known from the begining to whom he may insinuare the inticements of gluttony to whom he may poure in the poison of Envy to whom he may lay the baits of faire perswasions unto luxurie to whom he may promise the vaine allurements of Pride he knoweth whom he may oppresse with feare whom he may deceive with joy whom he may seduce with admiration He hath also some obliged unto him whole Wit and Language he maketh use of to the deceiving of others O Soule fraile to resist easie to fall difficult to rise how shalt thou be able to escape the snares of this cruell adversary whom thou knowest to be endowed with so many subtilties SOVLE NOw I see now I first perceive that as Saint Anselme saith it is the Custome of sinne which is not easily known of him who is pressed therewith but presently when any one shall begin to alienate himselfe from it then at last he knoweth in how great obscenity and pollution he hath continued Therefore because I now somewhat begin to alienate my selfe from sinne and thereby I come to acknowledge my selfe and my sinne I am not further able to containe my selfe from lamentation O Lord my God thou hast impressed in me thy most lovely image and J have deformed it with a most hatefull Diabolicall similitude Alas alas miserable man that J have imprinted the Image of the Devill on the Jmage of God why have J not hated the imitation of him whose name J do abhorre He hath fallen of his own accord J willingly have gone astray He with the bare punishment preceding proudly hath sinned J having seen his punishment contemning it have sinned He was once created in Jnnocency J often times have been restored He hath raised himselfe against him that made him J have raised my self against him that hath made me a new He hath forsaken God that permitted him to fall but I have fled from that God that sought after me He remaineth in malice being reprobated of God I runne from God that
hand-maid O Lord Jesus Christ who for me hast not spared thy selfe so vulnerate my heart and so Inebriate my mind with thy blood that what way soever I shall turne my selfe I alwayes may behold thee Crucified and whatsoever I shall look upon may appeare to me ruddy with thy blood that so I may wholly intend thee that I might not find any thing beside thee nor behold any thing but thy wounds This is my comfort I have crucified my self O Lord with thee and let it be to me intimate affliction to mediate upon any thing except thee There is no Affection greater no charity more sincere Hugo de Sancto Victore no love stronger the Innocent hath dyed for me finding nothing in me that he might love But alas as often as I consider this wonderfull favour of divine Piety towards us I am not a little confounded and ashamed of my too much Ingratitude MAN O My Soule thou hast forsaken thy Spouse Hugo de Arrha Animae thou hast prostituted thy love and hast not given thanks for these great benefits yet that he might release thee from thence whence thou hadst falne he hath pleased to descend and piously to suffer that which thou didst endure Think therefore how much he loved thee which by no way but by dying would free thee from death Wherefore O my soule by how much the more worthy thou knowest the benefits of thy Redeemer are by so much the sinnes of thy Ingratitude are the worse See therefore that thou be not ingratefull on whom so many benefits are bestowed for the sinne of Ingratitude is very great because according to Saint Bern. Ingratitude is as it were a burning Wind drying up the Rivers of divine mercy the fountaine of clemency the torrents of Grace Consider therefore O my Soule often ponder and revolve in thy mind the horrible sentence which is pronounced against ingratefull persons in the Person of our Saviour saying O Soule see how great things I suffer for thee I call unto thee who dye for thee See the paines wherewith I am tormented See the Nailes wherewith I am pierced heare the reproaches wherewith I am confounded But although the externall griefe is great yet the Internall torment is far greater when I find thee so ingratefull and else where It is inveighed against ingratefull men in the person of Christ saying Et alibi Bernard O my people what have I done unto thee or in what have I molested thee answer me What is the cause thou wouldest rather obey my Enemy then me Consider that I am he who have created thee I have enriched thee with all good things if these be accounted but little to ingratefull persons yet I have redeemed thee with my most pretious blood Ah! O my soule let not these things depart from thy heart slip from thy mouth alwayes render thanks never cease to blesse and magnifie the only begotten Sonne of God for these his great benefits Let they dearly beloved be for all these benefits sometime to thee a Bundell of Myrrhe in thy heart sometime joy in thy mind praise in thy mouth Melody in thy Eare. SOVLE NOw I am not able longer to containe my self tell I pray thee what shall I render our Lord for all that he hath bestowed on me MAN O My Soule as St. Bern. saith In his Meditations thou owest to him thy whole life and not unworthily because he laid down his own life for thee and hath sustained cruell torments that thou mightest not endure eternall punishment What therefore can seeme hard unto thee when thou shalt call to mind that he that is comely in the favour of God would be crucified for thee O how undue a pitty how free a favour how unlooked for a Charity how wonderfull a sweetness is it that the King of Glory should dye and be crucified for a most despicable worme O how sweet a friend how strong a helper how wise a reconciler is this SOVLE O Man J confesse and truely acknowledge if J had the lives of all the Sons of Adam in me all the dayes of an Age the endeavours of all men that are have been or shall be it were nothing in comparison of that which my Spouse hath sustained for me which the Son of God hath suffered for my sinnes When as therefore J shall give all that J am and whatsoever I am able it will not be as a starr to the Sun as a drop to an Ocean or as dust to a Mountaine MAN O My Soule because I now begin to consider that the Eye of Contemplation being more perspicuous thou acknowledgest the Grace of divine redemption whereby thy Spouse hath delivered thee from originall sinne yet a little now I will begin to speak for my God and show thee to that heap of divine mercy whereby thou art freed from actuall sinne also Convert therefore the light of Contemplation unto the benefit of justification and consider the favour of thy Lord how paternally by secret inspiration he hath recalled thee from sinne how sweetly and how lovingly he hath recalled thee comforting thee by internall communication saying Return Return O Shunamite that is O soule by sinne miserably infected captivated or mortified Returne saith hee O Soule to mee I am thy Creator returne I am thy Redeemer Returne I am thy Comforter And if these seem but little returne last of all because I am thy very liberall rewarder Returne therefore to me I am hee that have so nobly created thee Returne I am he who so mercifully by my most bitter death have delivered thee from eternall damnation Return to mee I am he that so manifoldly have enriched thee with spirituall and corporall good things Returne at last to me O soule I am he who so liberally have now rewarded thee by prepared felicity Returne saith hee from the sin of thought Returne from the sinne of Speech Returne from the sinne of Action Return from the sinne of Custome Returne to me O Soule the Saints with great desire expect thee and at thy comming the Angels rejoyce Return Jesus Christ calls thee with hands extended on the Cross Returne the Abiss of the whole Trinity wait for thy returne O Soule if thou well remembrest this is the voice of thy welbeloved inviâ—ing thee Consider now how great hath been the longanimity of him expecting thee O what a long time he hath expected thy comming alas what a time hath he suffered thee in thy sinnes O how many and for what hath he damned for their sinnes before thy conversion yet mercifully hath he expected thee alwayes sinning Returne yet O Soule Christ expecting thee on the Cross hath his head inclined to kiss thee a a sinner and uncleane hath his Armes stretched forth to embrace thee his hands open to forgive thee his body extended wholly to bestow himselfe upon thee his feet fastened to remain with thee his side opened to suffer thee to enter therein Be therefore now O
of the finall Judgment SOVLE NOW thou hast spoken sufficiently of death so also speak of the state of final Judgment MAN O My Soule J do what thou exhortest yet J entreat thee to hear with patience Thou oughtest to know that although it be a horrible thing to meditate on death yet to meditate on the state of finall Judgment as I am perswaded it is no less formidable because there is not any that then shall be able to deceive his Wisdom to alter his Justice to incline his Clemency to avoid the sentence of revenge and just retribution St. Bern. Consider therfore O my Soule with trembling how it shall bee with theein the last day when thy Conscience shall speak against thee of thy thoughts when the Elements shall accuse thee of all thy Actions when the Cross of Christ shall be carried for a testimony against thee when his stripes shall cry out against thee his wounds plead against thee his nails speak against thee his scarrs complaine against thee O Anguish hence shall proceed the accusing sins from thence terrifying justice within a burning Conscience below the horrible Chaos of Hell above the angry Judge of just Judgment without the flaming World within the fearfull justice of the Judge And if then the just shal scarcely be saved where shall the wicked man and sinner appear Where shall they hide themselves To lye hid impossible to appeare is intollerable O sinfull Soul Anselm in meditationibus unprofitable and dry wood adjudged to eternal flames what will thou answer at the day when all the time bestowed on thee shall be even to the twinkling of an eye exacted how thou hast spent it Ah Ah! O my Soul what shall then become of vain and idle thoughts of light sportfull and ridiculous words of unprofitable and unfruitfull works Woe is me St. Amb. on St. Luke if I shall not lament for my sins woe is me if I shall not rise at midnight to confess to thee Now the Axe is laid to the Tree let him that may bring forth fruits the works truly worthy of repentance O my Soul whether thou wakest or sleepest let that horrible Trumpet alwaies sound in thy Ears Arise yee dead and come co judgment O my Soule never let this pass from thy memory Go yee cursed into fire everlasting Come yee blessed receive a Kingdom O what can bee thought more lamentable or more terrible then Go yee And what can bee exprest more pleasant then Come yee They are two Voyces then the one whereof there is nothing can be heard more horrible then the other nothing mre delightful O my Soule now separate thy self from the world that hereafter thou mayst abide with Christ Now fly the world that thou mayst follow God Now forsake the Companies and Societies of wicked people that hereafter thou mayst be able to follow the Troops of Saints CHAP. III. Of the intollerable pain of Infernall punishment MAN AFter all these convert thy Contemplation to the torments of Reprobates take notice how various they are how sharp how intollerable St. Bernard to Eugenius I am afraid of and am astonied at the gnawing Worm never dying death O infernall Region to be flyed where there is flaming fire chilling cold the immortall Worm intollerable stench and brusing mallets palpable darkness confusion of Sinners and intangling of Fetters and the horrible sight of Devils Wo be to him for whom the gnawing worm St. Aug. in quodam sermone burning flame thirst without drink weeping and gnashing of teth continuall tears shall be prepared where death is wished for but shall not bee granted where there is no order but ever lasting horrour doth inhabit What dost thou think then shall bee the sorrow what the grief what the lamentation when the wicked shall bee separated from the company of the just and shal be delivered to the power of Devils and shall go with them to everlasting punishment and shall for ever be with them in lamentation mourning groaning without end far from the joyes of Paradice never to receive comfort or recreation but to be tormented for many thousands of years and yet alas most miserable never to be released There the tormentor and Punisher shall never bee weary there he that is tormented shall never dye For so shal that fire consume that it shall alwaies notwithstanding preserve life they shall so suffer old torments as if they were alwaies renewed they shall alwaies so live without hope of pardon or mercy as they should dy notwithstanding they shall so dye as notwithstanding they may never be consumed SOVLE O Man wherfore is death as thou sayest in Hell sought for and not found And wherfore is that punished eternally which was committed temporally MAN BEcause according to Sr. Gregory to whom life is offered in this world and they would not receive it in Hell they shall seek death shall not find it idem The wicked willingly would live eternally that they might persist in their Iniquities for ever Therfore it pertaineth to the justice of the just Judg that they should never want punishment whose mind in this life would never want sin St. Hierome O death how sweet will thou be to those to whom thou hast been so bitter they only desire thee who so vehemently have hated thee O my Soul if these before spoken of seem so terrible unto thee heare those things which are more harsh then all these If thou sest before me a thousand Hells St. Chrysost upon St. Matthew I do not so much weigh them as to be expelled from the pleasure of that glorious Society and to become hatefull to my Creator O my Soul Hell is terrible but more terrible is the angry countenance of the Judge but that which surpasseth all terrour is the perpetuall elongation from the Contemplation of the most sweet and most blessed Trinity To be excluded from the eternall good and be estranged from that which God hath prepared for them that love him doth beget so much torment that if outwardly no torment or punishment should torment this only was sufficient and it would be better to endure a thousand thousand flames then to behold that most meek face of Christ angry and from it to be eternall separated O if God hath dealt thus with the Angells growing proud what shal become of Earth and Ashes He was proud in a Celestiall Palace but I upon a Dunghil Who will not affirm that it is more tollerable in a rich man to be proud then in a poor man Wo is me if pride bee so austerely and harshly punishable in an Angel how in me miserable and poore is it to be adjudged O mercifull Jesus for thy names sake grant me thy mercy and pardon me proud provoking thee Behold me miserable humbly calling upon thee and acknowledge O most benign God what is thine and wipe away what is any others Have pity O Lord whilst there is time of pity least
thou condemnest me in the time of judgment True it is These St. Anselme in his meditations that my Conscience hath deserved damnation my repentance sufficeth not for satisfaction yet certain it is that thy mercy is above every offence Do not O Lord St Aug. in his meditations so look into my evil that thou mayst forget thy owne goodness O good Lord if I have committed that wherby thou mayst condemn me thou hast not lost that wherwith thou mayst save me St. Gregory in Hom. O if man could but understand how admirable that is Behold the Spouse cometh How pletsant Those that were prepared entred with him to the marriage How bitter And the Gate was shut O my Soule what is more Consider how great an evil it is to be separated from the face of Christ to be excluded from that joy of divine Contemplation to be deprived of the most blessed Society of all the Saints to dye an everlasting life and to live an eternall death to be plunged in the bottom of a restless Gulph for ever to be torne in peeces with consuming worms and yet the torments not to end to suffer the noise of raging flames to be blinded with the bitter myst of the sulphurous smoaking Pit not to perceive that which enlightneth but to perceive that which tormenteth St. Aug. Such shall be the power of grief in the infernal deep that it admitteth no other intention of thought within it self SOVLE NOw I tremble with fear now I faint with the horrour therof Tell me I pray thee O man to what purpose is so lamentable a Meditation MAN O My Soul I think that the continuall and devout meditation of the prescribed is the sinners medicine and wholsom encourager and provoker to do all good things and to sustain all evil Thou fearest watching and the labour of thy hands St. Bern. inquadam Epistola but these are but easie to any one meditating on perpetuall flames The remembrance of that darkness maketh a man not to abhor Solitude yet if thou leasurely thinkest on a future discussion of thy words silence shall not displease thee that weeping and gnashing of teeth being often brought before the eyes of thy understanding do render unto thee equall rest and peace St. Aug. inquodam sermone A mans understanding being overcome with the inticements and concupiscences of this world flyeth all labour desireth pleasures can scarce be brought to this that hee can refrain the customes of his former life But when hee shall begin to think on the necessity of future judgment he induceth a voluntary war on his passions moved either by hope of reward or for fear of punishment hee doth violence to his former desires and earnestly contendeth to overcome himselfe Whence cometh these Verses O foelix mortale Genus si semper haberet Aeternum prae mente bonum finemque timeret Right happy is that man that ever hath The eternall good in 's mind and fears his death The fourth Exercise How the Soul by mentall Exercise ought to convert the light of Contemplation to those things that are above her that shee may know and understand 1. The inestimable value of Celestiall Joy 2. The unspeakable Delight and 3. The interminable Eternity CHAP. I. Of the Inestimable value of Celestiall Joy SOVLE EVen now O man thou hast sufficiently affrighted me miserable soule being prostrated in this vale of teares although thou hast taught me not unprofitably have mercy also now on mee most miserable and do what thou long since hast promised Speak a little of the perpetuall felicity if happily I may be able to receive thereby some comfort of mind for that it is delightfull to use change because according to Saint Aug. It is alwayes well done whether it be by punishing or pardoning or by terrifying or comforting so that there by the life of man may be amended Consider O man how noble the mind of man is often times it is more easily perswaded with easie and pleasant things then by terrible and adverse oftentimes it is more allured by promisses and things comforting then it is enforced by threats and terrours Wherefore our Sister the Spouse desired to be drawn with the odour of Celestiall Unguents with the savour of divine graces and so to runne with the Spouse and now not out of feare but love delightfully to walk in the way of his Commandements MAN O My Soule it is true I confesse which thou sayest but alas there are many which will not imitate God in Prosperity Wherefore it is convenient that they be terrified in Adversity For there are many which either for blindnesse understand not the divine Graces or for negligence loose them in vaine Employments Wherefore as I beleeve God out of the abundance of his Infinite goodness would alwayes be ready rather to favour them with Consolations then to affright them with austerities if men were rightly disposed that they might receive his divine consolation which is so pretious and delicate that by no means it is fitting or expedient that it should be indifferently bestowed on all Thou therefore if thou aspirest after all these things proposed unto thee see that thou have a pure understanding and a well disposed affection because the chiefest good is not discerned according to Saint Aug. but by the clearest understandings and I think it is much lesse tasted but by very well disposed affections For it is of many men in this life clearly discerned of whom neverthelesse it is in no wise tasted Wherefore Saint Aug. saith O Lord mak me I desire thee to taste that by affection which by my intellect J understand make me to perceive that by love which J perceive by knowledge SOVLE TEll me J pray thee O man what dispositions ought to proceed in affection and understanding that at least to a little Excess of mind J may be able to tast in contemplation the Celestiall sweetnesse For J have long agoe exercised my mind in speculation and alas as yet my feare is that J have never felt the least drop of that Heavenly sweetnesse J have read many things of the lives and conversation of Saints many things of Nature of the operations and orders of Angels also I have read some things of the inestimable unity of the Divinity of the Incomprehensible Trinity of the Godhead more of the inestimable happinesse of all the blessed and when with all my endeavours I have employed my mind to the former studies alass I have remained yet Hunger-starven and empty and have alwaies cryed out with blessed Saint Aug. Make me O most mercifull Father to tast by affection what I perceive by my understanding and yet I have not profited Also oftentimes being wearied with long study and angry at my self I have cryed out with the Prophet expecting the Crummes which fall from the Table of their Lord in that Heavenly Court How long O Lord wilt thou forget me for ever How long dost thou