It will direct them when their Neighbour or Friend is overtaken with a fault to restore him with the Spirit of Meekness It will make them not to seek their own things only but likewise their Neighbours good as well as their own It will not only restrain them from what is manifestly evil but will also make them careful to avoid every appearance of it to shun the very thoughts and desire of Wickedness It will cause them to be content with what God bestows upon them and not to envy others not to covet their Goods nor wrong them by word or deed And â—in a word the lively Impressions of Religion will make them careful to keep their Consciences Void of Offence both towards God and towards Men. Now if these Rules of our Holy Religion had their due Influence on the minds of People what a Blessed and Happy Society would there be in the World How easie would every Man be How well-pleased How safe and secure from hurt and danger How confident in his Friends Neighbours and Acquaintance Knowing and being well assured that they fear and love God and therefore will do no wrong As the Consideration of these things ought to make Parents very careful to do all that ever they can towards the right Education of their Children so iâ— ought mightily to excite all Christian Rulers and Governours to do their part in this matter particularly to take care that there be Schools every where and that such Persons be chosen to Educate Children at School as not only are skilful to teach them to Read Write c. But who may contribute likewise towards the seasoning their minds with Religious Principles who will look upon it as one great part of their Business to endeavour to possess them with the Fear and Love of God How worthy of Christian Magistrates were it also to take care that all Schools and Colleges be visited often by fit Persons that the Diligent may be encouraged and that the Remiss and Negligent or the Vicious and Prophane may be discouraged by all Just and Lawful means These things cannot be look'd upon as Forreign to the Magistrates Office if it be but duely considered how much Benefit comes to the State by the good Education of Children and how much mischief cometh thereto by the neglect of their Education Of old the Persians Lacedemonians Cretians and others thought it their Interest to see to the right Education of Children they did not think it safe to leave so great a Trust wholly in the hands of Parents who through Partiality Fondness or Indiscretion might utterly spoil them and thereby do unspeakable Mischief to the State And no doubt till once all Christian Rulers and Governours both in Church and State make it more their business to see to the right Education of Children there is no great hopes of ever seeing any considerable Reformation in the World Fifthly If you neglect to do these things for the Souls of your Children and leave them to themselves to do as they list then you may expect that their Sins and Follies their Pride and Passion their Gluttony and Drunkenness their Cursing and Swearing their Lying and Deceiving their Malice and Revenge their Chambering and Wantonness their Atheism and Irreligion will not only prove Tragical to them but occasion great uneasiness Vexation and Grief of Mind to you Prov. 10. 1. A foolish Son is a heaviness to his Mother and Chap. 17. 21. He that begetteth a Fool doth it to his Sorrow and the Father of a Fool hath no Joy 'T is true 't is not in the Power of Parents to infuse good Qualities into the minds of their Children some are so very perverse that all that can be said or done by Parents is altogether slighted and neglected by them We know that Abraham had an Ishmael as well as an Isaac and Isaac an Esau as well as a Jacob and Jacob a Reuben as well as a Joseph However such Parents who have the affliction of sad and wretched Children have some comfort and satisfaction in having done their Duty for them and in endeavouring to approve themselves unto God who will accept of their honest and sincere endeavours and will crown them with glorious Rewards But it is otherwise when Children prove bad through the too great Indulgence or the Negligence and bad Example of Parents What a deep wound must it needs give them when they begin to consider that they did not their part to make their Children good and were so far from it that they corrupted and ruined them by their bad Example and over great kindness and indulgence Such Parents do often eat the Fruits of their cruel fondness and feel the sad Effects of their own bad Example by means of their Prophane and Graceless Children As God doth often visit the Iniquity of the Parents upon the Children so when Children are suffered to go on in their foolish and wicked courses through the indiscreet gentleness and kindness of Parents who perhaps are in other respects good People the Lord doth sometimes punish such Parents and bring Temporal Judgments upon them Ely was a great instance of this 1 Sam. 2. and 22. He heard all that his Sons did unto all Israel which were things of a very vile Nature whereby as it 's said Chap. 3. and 13. they made themselves vile that is hateful to God and base and contemptible to all the People by their lewd and abominable Practices Ely did reprove them but it was too coldly and gently Chap. 2. 23 24 And he said unto them Why do you such things for I hear of your evil dealings by all this People Nay my Sons for it is no good Report that I hear you make the Lord's People to transgress Besides his reproof he ought to have restrained them Ch. 3. and 13. as being High Priest a Judge and Chief Governour amongst the People He ought to have put them out of the Priesthood as accurssed Persons and Executed the Laws of God against them Which because he did not therefore God denounced very dreadful Judgments against him by a Prophet whom he sent unto him Chap. 2. 31 3â— 33 34 36. and Chap. 3. 13 14. And in Chap. 4. we find his two Sons Hophâ—â— and Phineas were slain in Battel by the Philistines and the Ark of God was taken upon the news whereof the Old Man fell from off his Seat backwards and his Neck brake and he died We see likewise in David what was the Effect of his too great indulgence to some of his Children especially Absalom and Adonijah who not only wrought their own destruction but proved great Crosses to their aged Father Here it will not be unfit to relate what St. Augustin tells us of the sad Effects of leaving a Child to himself and not endeavouring to Educate him aright The Story is this There was one Cyril a Citizen of Hippo who having one only Son was so fond of him that
to their Fighting and Wrestling against their Enemies and bestowed on them a Crown of Glory and an Everlasting Inheritance when he hath broken their Bonds asunder wherein they were held and kept in Captivity and Slavery and hath put them into a state of perfect and glorious Freedom The consideration of these things should mitigate and asswage your Sorrow and Grief and fill you with unspeakable Comfort and Gladness But some are apt to say I should rejoyce if I thought that my Children who are dead were in Heaven But this I do not know As to this you are not to trouble your thoughts about it for God does not see fit to acquaint you with such things Secret things belong to God and things revealed to us and to our Children Deut. 29. 29. If your Children while they were alive minded good things and if you did your part to instruct them and to make them what God requires them to be you are not to be any further solicitous about their Everlasting state You are to hope that they are very happy and you are to comfort your selves with these thoughts Others are apt to say I am afraid that my Children are not in a happy state they did very bad things and used bad Company and therefore I have cause to fear and to be troubled about them now that they are dead As to such Parents who have had wretched Children they ought not to suffer their minds to be disordered and oppressed with Grief and Sorrow because their Children who died were wicked If they did their Duty to make them better if they advised and admonished them if they reproved them and as was fitting chastened them if they desired others to deal with them to see what they could do towards the reclaiming of them if they prayed to God for them and gave them a good Example They are not any further to be troubled and disquieted concerning them when God takes them into his own hand He is wise and good holy and just he does all things well for excellent and glorious ends and therefore Parents ought to leave them to his Disposal who is the Supreme Governour of the World and Judge of the whole Earth Whatever he does whether in Mercy or Justice is always best The Inhabitants of the other World who are translated into a state of Heavenly Glory are not under the power of such passions and partialities as govern us here below The glorified Parents of damned Children are not under any uneasiness on that or any other account The Will of God and his Glory is their all they know that whatever he does is most perfectly just and good and for his Honour and therefore all things afford them great Pleasure and Delight true and lasting Joy and Satisfaction of mind There 's nothing able to interrupt the happiness and joy of those in Glory They are perfectly and eternally delivered from all sort of evils both of sin and punishment They are placed above the reach of whatever may render them in the least uneasie But there is a third sort of those who are troubled not only because their Children were bad and prophane but because they were so through their example or neglect As for such I have already in general shewed them what they ought to do I shall only add That since they have been so faulty and defective in their Duty towards their Deceased Children they ought to be the more careful of those who are yet alive and to do all that is possible to make them what God requires them to be As to those who have no more Children left them it would be very fit for them to take into their care one or more Children upon whom they may bestow all that pains and care which they should have bestowed in the right Education of their own and endeavour by God's help to make them truly Pious and Religious and Patterns of all sorts of Virtue to others This is an Office which will be very acceptable to God and one of the best demonstrations which Parents can make of the sincerity of their Repentance for their not having done their Duty to their own Children Fourthly Consider that there will be a Resurrection of all those that are dead The mighty Power of God which made all things out of nothing will also gather together the scattered dust of those who are deceased and will reform and rebuild as it were their bodies which are fallen down and consumed He will raise them up again in a more excellent perfect and glorious manner Then shall you meet with your Children and Friends who died in the Lord and behold them after another manner than you saw them here in this World Instead of weak and diseased bodies you shall see them strong vigorous and lively bodies Instead of frail and dying bodies you shall see immortal and incorruptible bodies Instead of filthy and vile bodies you shall see pure and glorious bodies And you shall see them so as to be with them for ever so as never any more to be separated from them by death or any other thing for you and they shall die no more 1 Cor. 15. 42 43 44. So also is the resurrection of the dead It is sown in corruption it is raised in incorruption it is sown in dishonour it is raised in glory It is sown in weakness it is raised in power It is sown a natural body it is raised a spiritual body And vers 53. This corruptible must put on incorruption and this mortal must put on immortality How gladly would poor People part with their dearest Children if they could be assured of seeing them again in an honourable state and condition exalted to great Dignity and Honour And will not you who have the hopes of a glorious Resurrection be comforted in the absence of your Children When their merciful God and Father takes them away from you unto himself not to do them hurt but good to make them happy and blessed with himself for ever to bestow upon them what Eye hath not seen nor Ear heard nor which hath entred into the Heart of Man to conceive Consider the words of the Apostle to the Thessalonians 1 Epist. 4. 13 14. But I would not have you to be ignorant Brethren concerning them which are asleep that ye sorrow not even as others which have no hope For if we believe that Jesus dyed and rose again even so them which sleep in Jesus will God bring with him Fifthly Your giving way to excessive Grief and Mourning can do you no good but will certainly do you a great deal of hurt and mischief in many respects It cannot bring back your Children that are dead Though you should break your Hearts into a thousand pieces by your weeping and mourning and waste and consume your years in constant heaviness and sorrow tho' you should never henceforth allow your selves one moment of relaxation of mind after all you must go to
2. 24. he said Therefore shall a Man leave his Father and Mother and cleave unto his Wife and they shall be one Flesh. Now by Virtue of this near Relation and close Union they ought to have a tender regard for the Interests and Concerns of one another and the dearer any thing is to the one the greater affection ought the other to have towards it As therefore 't is past all doubt that Children are the dearest and most valued and beloved Earthly thing that Natural Parents have upon this account it is very reasonable that Step-Parents should express a great Regard and Affection for them 2. This is the way to preserve and to increase that mutual Love which ought to be 'twixt Man and Wife If a Step-Parent is kind and loving to the Children and careful to promote their Happiness and Welfare it cannot but have an Influence on the Natural Parent so as to produce an Increase of Love and Respect which will render the lives of the married Persons very easie and comfortable Whereas on the other hand if Step-Parents are rough unkind and unnatural to their Step-Children it must needs cause a great deal of mischief it will certainly cool if not quite alienate the affection of the Natural Parent and when once this happens there is thenceforth nothing but strife and contention jealousies and suspicions which are ordinarily attended with very sad and dreadful effects to the utter Ruin of one or t'other Party if not of both 3. This is the way to make the Children very respectful and kind and very dutiful and obedient to them when they use them kindly are careful to seek their happiness and welfare and carry themselves towards them in all respects as they ought to do Whereas on the contrary by being unkind to them and unconcerned for their happiness and welfare they provoke them to hate them and to prove Disrespectful and Disobedient to them 4. This is the way to gain a great deal of Love and Respect from all those who are Related to the Deceased Parents who cannot chuse but resent it very kindly when they see the Children of their Friends well used and taken care of both as to their Souls and Bodies This will make them ready upon all occasions to serve them and to do them the best Offices which are in their power Whereas on the other hand if they see the poor Children of their Deceased Friends neglected and contemned wrong'd and abus'd by unkind Step-Parents they must needs take it in very ill part and resent it heavily yea and all other Persons who see or hear of such unkindness severity and injustice towards poor Children cannot chuse but think very ill of those who discover themselves to be altogether void not only of Religion but of Humanity also From what hath been said it appears how very just and reasonable it is for Step-Parents to be heartily concerned both for the Spiritual and Temporal welfare and happiness of their Children And therefore how much are they to be Condemned who make no Conscience at all of doing any thing for the benefit of either their Souls or Bodies As to their Souls some Step-Parents are so far from endeavouring to season them with good Impressions and to fortifie them against Tentations that they themselves are their greatest Tentation and do them the greatest hurt and prejudice As to their Bodies they grudge them necessary Food and Rayment and seldom let them have any thing with good will And as to their Outward Estate they are so far from improving for their Advantage the Portion of Worldly Goods that belongeth to them that on the contrary they use their utmost Policy to rob them and to disinherit them that they may build their own Childrens Fortune upon the others Ruin for which end they make it their business to alienate the Affection of their Natural Parent they invent a great many wicked and malicious Stories which with great boldness and impudence they fasten upon them and they never give over working and undermining till they have brought about their cruel and cursed Devices But surely he that sits in Heaven and beholds all their contrivances even he who is the God of Recompences will in due time bring to Light their hidden Works of Darkness and will vindicate the cause of those poor Children and render to their cruel Persecutors according to their Works he will fooner or later cause them to feel the heavy Load of his Just and Terrible Indignation The Duties of Guardians GUardians are either chosen by Parents before their Death or by Children themselves after their Parents Decease or by the Magistrate Which way soever they are chosen their Duty is to do what they can for the benefit and advantage of their Pupils both in Spiritual and Temporal Things As to their Souls they must take care of their good Education according to their Age and Capacity If they are not as yet taught to read they ought to make choice of a skilful and prudent Schoolmaster or Tutor for them of whose fitness for such a Charge they are well assured But they must not so intrust them to the Care of such Persons as never to mind them more themselves They ought to enquire after them now and then and either by themselves or others more fit for it make tryal of their proficiency that so they may be able to judge and resolve what is further to be done for them As for the way of training them up in true Piety the Directions given to Parents are to be observed and practised As to their Bodies the former Directions likewise to Parents concerning Childrens Diet and Apparel ought to be followed As to their outward Estate when they are fit for a Trade or some sort of business they ought to take care to settle them in good Company so far as is possible and in such a way of living as is most agreeable to their Genius and Inclination and which their Friends and Relations reckon most sutable and convenient for them It will afford great peace and satisfaction to Guardians whatever be the Event if in this matter they have a due regard to Childrens own Inclination and to the Opinion of their Friends and Relations As to their Marriage when it is time to dispose of them that way they onght to do nothing by force and violence They must not constrain them to Marry unless they have a mind themselves And tho' they are not bound absolutely to approve of those whom their Pupils fancy without any regard to their fitness yet they are obliged by the Law of Justice and Equity not to impose upon them such Matches as they cannot like As to their Patrimony and Inheritance they ought to improve it as much as may be for the Childrens good and to employ it wholly for their use except so far as the Law does allow them their necessary Charges in which they ought to govern themselves by that Golden-Rule Mat.
which Words it appears That all who believe not only Jews or Persons Circumcised but Gentiles also or Persons uncircumcised are accounted the Children of Abraham and capable to partake of that Happiness and Salvation which was Promised to him as the Father of the Faithful To the same purpose saith the Apostle writing to the Galatians Chap. 3. 9. They which be of Faith are blessed with Faithful Abraham And v. 29. If ye be Christ's then are ye Abraham 's Seed and Heirs according to the Promise Again 1 Cor. 7. 14. he saith The unbelieving Husband is Sanctified by the Wife and the unbelieving Wife is Sanctified by the Husband Else were your Children unclean but now are they Holy Which intimates that the Children of all Believers whether they be Jews or Gentiles are within God's Covenant and have a Right to those Favours and Priviledges which he hath annexed thereto Likewise Acts 2. 39. 't is said The Promise is unto you and to your Children and to all that are afar off even as many as the Lord our God shall call So that all who are called by the Preaching of the Gospel and do believe in the Lord Jesus are both themselves and their Children within the Covenant of Grace If it were not so Then the Blessing of Abraham were not come on the Gentiles through Jesus Christ as it affirmed Gal. 3. 14. For how could the same Blessing be come on the Gentiles if their Children were not comprehended within the Covenant of Grace which was a part of the Blessing of Abraham And how could Christians be Heirs according to the Promise if their Children have no Right to it as Abraham's Children had Or can it be imagined that the Condition of Believers under the Gospel is worse than the Condition of those who believed under the Law Are God's Mercies and Favours to Mankind impaired by Christ's coming into the World Has the great Lover of Souls the Redeemer of the World been the occasion of our loseing great and considerable Priviledges by his Tabernacling amongst us And yet all this must needs follow if now under the Gospel the Children of Believers are excluded from the Covenant of Grace which they were admitted to under the Law which is very inconsistent with the Divine Goodness and contrary to the Love of our Lord Jesus which he manifested in his Blessed Gospel where we find he Commanded the Children to be brought unto him and blamed those who would have kept them from him He took them into his Arms laid his Hands upon them and Blessed them and declared that he accounted them Heirs of the Kingdom of Heaven Mat. 19. 13 14 15. and Mark 10. 13 14 15. 16. From all which both Words and Deeds of our Saviour we may see very plainly he was far from hindering their being admitted Members of his Church and Kingdom The Right of Infants to Baptism will further appear if you consider more particularly the Institution of Baptism The Jews were wont to admit into their Church not only Aged Persons who were converted to Paganism but likewise their Children which they did by Circumcision Sacrifice and Baptism Our Saviour being to determine the manner of admitting Disciples and Proselytes into his Church that he might make his Yoke easie to those who would come after him laid aside Circumcision which was a painful Rite and Sacrifices which were very Costly and only retained Baptism to be the Sacrament of Initiation or Admission of Disciples into his Church Go ye said he to his Apostles Mat. 28. 19. and teach or as the Words may be Translated Disciple or make Disciples of all Nations Baptizing them in the Name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Ghost Now this Command being given to Men who knew that the Infants of those who were Converted were admitted into the Jewish Church as well as the Parents themselves is there the least Ground to imagine any other but that our Saviour's Design was that the Children of Believers should still be admitted into his Church as well as formerly into the Jewish And no doubt if he had thought fit to discontinue the Jewish Practice he would have expresly signified his Mind about it to prevent an otherwise unavoidable mistake To all which might be added that the Catholick or Universal Church not only at this Day but in former Ages has observed this Custom of Baptizing the Children of Christian Parents Now if Children have so good a Right to Baptism what shall be said of those Parents who â—light and neglect it and so deprive their poor Children of that which God their Heavenly Father hath ordained for so great and excellent purposes We see how careful Parents are if their Children have a Title to Houses and Lands or other Temporal Things to use their utmost Endeavours to make their Title as sure unto them as is possible And yet how sad is it to think that they are not at all careful to have their Children Baptized tho' God has appointed this Sacrament to be the Seal of his Covenant and an Evidence of that Right which Believers and their Children have to the Kingdom of Heaven 2. Duty to feason their Minds betimes with good Impressions Secondly When Children begin to speak and to discover some dawnings of Reason it is fit to season their Minds with some good Thoughts with some divine Impressions that Religion betimes may catch hold of their tender and innocent Minds before they are corrupted and defiled with bad Principles and vain and unreasonable Opinions which they are apt to learn too soon from evil Company Teach them who made them who dyed for them for what end they were made whither good Children go when they dye and whither naughty Children go what a place Heaven is and Hell c. Amongst other Things 't will be very useful to tell Children some of the most remarkable Histories in Scripture as so many Arguments and Motives to excite them to be good Children and to avoid all wicked and naughty Courses For Example tell them the Story of the Deluge how God punished the Old World because they were wicked but saved Noah Thereby take occasion to shew them the Danger of being wicked that sinning with Company will not preserve from Punishment what a Happy thing it is to be good and how kind the Lord is to such who keep his Commandments as Noah did To this purpose tell them also the Story of Sodom and Gomorrah c. How those Cities were consumed by Fire from Heaven for their great Wickedness and how Lot was preserved from that dreadful Destruction Tell them the History of David and Goliah that they may learn not to be proud of their Strength but may put their Trust in God who is able to save them from their mightiest Enemies Tell them the Story of the naughty Children at Bethel how they mocked the Old Prophet Elijah and how 42 of them were torn in pieces by two Bears
use of them likewise and if they do not serve the turn then try the Rod Chasten thy Son says Solomon Prov. 19. 18. while there is hope and let not thy Soul spare for his crying And Ch. 13. 24. he saith He that spareth his Rod hateth his Son but he that loveth him Chasteneth him betimes But let this be always the last Remedy after you have in vain attempted their Reformation by milder and gentler Methods And when you use Severity do it with due moderation not exceeding the Quality of the Fault Beware of using great Severity when the Fault is very small and inconsiderable Respect must also be had to the Age Temper and Disposition of your Children if they are very young and tender your Correction must be the more gentle and moderate and if they are of a flexible and Ingenuous Temper you must be the more Favourable towards them Beware of correcting them when you find your Anger very hot for then you are apt to do more hurt than good Your Passion will hurry you if you restrain it not into somewhat or other very wicked as well as indiscreet it will make you do and say a great many things very unworthy of a Christian. Always therefore be careful that your Reason and not your Passion direct you in so important a matter as this is â—f once you fall into the rough severe and violent Method of dealing with your Children there are a great many Disadvantages will attend it First You discourage your Children you break their Spirits you make them unfit for any useful thing you tempt them to do such things as are hurtful to themselves and may prove grievous to you If Oppression makes a wise Man mad 't is no wonder if a Child or young Person is sadly disordered and made half mad by cruel and tyrannâ—câ—l usage Tho' it be a Fault in Children to be so yet Parents ought to be careful not to provoke them overmuch to wrath by a severe unmerciful carriage towards them 'T is not the less important and true because it is a common Observation to wit That a tender Sprig which grows crooked may be made straight by little and little if you bend it and handle it gently but if you bend it with great Force and Violence you may quickly break it Thus it is with Children generally who discover very early somewhat of crookedness in their Nature which is increased by evil Example if you use mild and gentle Methods to reform them temper'd now and then as need shall require with a little severity there is hopes that by degrees they will be reformed and made straight but if instead of this moderate course you use cruel Methods and deal rigidly and unmercifully with them you cannot expect any other but that their Spirits should be broken or hardened and so lose all sense of Ingenuity Secondly You kindle your own Passions you disorder your minds and accustom your selves to a fiery Temper you become fierce barbarous and savage whereby you turn one of your great Temporal Comforts into a grievous Cross and heavy Burden Thirdly You hereby likewise teach your Children through your Example to be of a passionate and violent Spirit and so you do them more hurt than all your Corrections and Instructions can do them good Never think to cure them of their Faults by your committing as bad your selves You must not do evil that good may come of it The Wrath of Man worketh not the Righteousness of God Fourthly You make your Children care less for your Corrections than otherwise they would do When you are always beating them in your Passion and tormenting them they must needs think that you do so not so much for any Fault they are guilty of as because you are very passionate and therefore must give your Passion a vent one way or other If therefore you would chasten your Children to good purpose do it when your Spirits are cool when your Reason is at hand to direct you and to keep you within bounds and not when you have lost your selves by being under the Power of a violent Passion If you are careful to follow this Christian Method you may then expect that God's kind Providence will second you in your Endeavours for reforming your Children Either they will grow better or however you will find Peace and Comfort when in this manner you govern your selves by the Laws of Religion and are not led by your unruly Passion That Parents may the better perform their Duty in correcting their Children they ought to observe and imitate the Example of our Heavenly Father who tho' whom he loveth he chasteneth Heb. 12. 6. yet he doth not afflict willingly nor grieve the Children of Men. Lam. 3. 33. He does not make use of the Rod but when it is necessary when his Mercy and Kindness do not prevail And when he does correct in the midst of Wrath he remembreth Mercy When he visits the Transgressions of his Children with the Rod and their Iniquity with Stripes Nevertheless his loving Kindness he does not take utterly from them nor suffer his Faithfulness to fail Ps. 89. 32 33. He is always ready to receive his penitent Children to have Mercy upon them He does not keep his Anger for ever A due Consideration of these things will direct Parents how to correct their Children both as to Time and Measure To what hath been said it will not be unfit to add That to render Reproof and Correction the more effectual it is necessary that both Parents concur therein not as if it were proper for them both together or one after another to reprove or chasten their Children for the same Fault for this would be rather very improper for the most part But when one of the Parents chides of corrects their Children the other ought so far to concur as to approve what is done and shew their displeasure towards those Children who have done that which deserves Chastisement They must not oppose one another in this matter when one reproves the other must not approve and commend when one condemns the other must not justifie when one endeavours to correct the other must not hinder it Otherwise the Children will be lost for it is not likely they will amend their Faults if they see that either of their Parents is their Patron to encourage and defend them or to excuse and extenuate what they do amiss They who are wise Parents ought to be so far from doing this that tho' one of them should happen to reprove or chasten a Child when there is no very great necessity for so doing yet the other Parent whether Father or Mother ought to conceal their present thoughts and wait a fit occasion to discourse the matter together that such unnecessary Reproofs and Chastisements may be prevented for the future If Parents do not carefully observe this Rule their Children will be sure to take notice of their Indiscretion and to make
fondness to one above all the rest This does not hinder but that Parents may to very good purpose give Rewards to their Children for their Acts of Virtue for their ready and chearful Obedience to their Commands for their diligence and care in performing what was appointed them c. Whereby they who do such things are encouraged and they who do not but are careless and negligent are punished and spurred up to amend their Faults But when such marks of Favour are bestowed 't is fit to let the rest know that if they do as well they also shall have a Reward By which means they will see that Virtue and Goodness are the things which their Parents love and esteem most and for which they are ready to bestow the marks of their Affection The Duty of Parents as to the outward Estate of their Children A Third thing that belongs to the care of Parents is the outward Estate of their Children First When they are fit for a Trade they ought to chuse an honest Employment for them To suffer them to live in Idleness is to ruin them If they have not some useful thing or other to take up their thoughts they are in great hazard of finding somewhat to do which is bad and hurtful both to themselves and others The Devil is always at hand to furnish Occasions to idle People for employing themselves to their own destruction The Athenians who for a great while were reckoned amongst the wisest People in the World were so sensible of the necessity and importance of Childrens being bred up to some Lawful Trade and Employment that by their Laws they obliged them to maintain their Parents and to supply them in their old Age only upon this supposition that their Parents had been careful to teach them an honest Trade Otherwise by their Laws Children were not bound to provide for them Tho' this is not to be brought into Practice amongst Christians it being contrary to Christian Principles for Children upon any Pretence whatsoever to neglect their Parents in distress Yet this Example sheweth how great a Crime it was reckoned amongst the wiser Heathens for Parents not to breed up their Children to some honest Employment As to the particular kind of Employment wherein Children are to spend their days it is to be left to the discretion and prudence of Parents They are so to instruct and dispose the minds of their Children that they may be ready to be determined to any Trade or manner of Life that 's honest which their Parents think best and meetest for them to follow But yet a great regard is to be had to the particular Genius and Inclination of Children which ordinarily disposeth them more for one sort of Employment than another It will make them more diligent in learning their Trade when they have a delight in it Otherwise if they are put forth to a Trade against their minds they are more likely to neglect it or to break off from it Seldom do such Persons attain unto great Perfection in their Employment who follow it against the Grain As for those whose great and plentiful Estate in the World doth raise them above the necessity of putting forth their Children to a Trade they ought notwithstanding to be careful to bring them up not in Idleness and Vanity but in such Studies and Exercises as are most proper for them and which tend to make them serviceable in their Generation When God created Adam after his own Image and placed him in the Garden of Eden which no doubt was the most Honourable State that ever Man was in upon Earth yet he did not suffer him to live in Idleness He appointed him an Employment to wit to dress and keep the Garden The greater that Mens Possessions are they ought to be so much the more concerned in the right Education of their Children that so they may be made the more fit to Inherit their Wealth and Riches How much reason had the Philosopher Crates to say that if he might he would go up unto the highest place of the City and there bespeak the Citizens in this manner O Men what mean ye to be 〈◊〉 so much pains and so incessantly to busie your thoughts how to heap up Wealth and Riches and yet to take so little care of your Children to whom you are to leave all these things Upon which Plutarch hath this wise Reflection That such Parents are very like those Foolish People who have a great deal of care of their Shoe but none at all of their Foot Great and Rich Men therefore ought to be very careful that their Children be well Educated that they be instructed in useful Arts and Sciences which may not only afford Pleasure and Delight unto their minds but may be of use and advantage to them in their Conversation in the World Above all they ought to endeavour that their Childrens minds be possessed with a lively sense of Religion with sincere Love to God with a fervent Zeal for his Glory with a great delight in all those things which are truly Noble and Worthy which tend to the Honour of God and the Benefit of Mankind and with an utter abhorrence and detestation of all wicked Practices of Prophane and Atheistical Company and of every appearance of Evil they ought to train them up in useful and pious Actions and Designs which may be of Advantage to Church or State that so they may prove a Blessing to the World and Pillars of that Society to which they belong Great care ought to be taken to make them understand the Vanity of Riches and Honour the great uncertainty and mutability of the things of this World and the many Tentations and Vexations which attend a plentiful Estate and great Fortune Endeavour to make them sensible that no Earthly Enjoyments are capable to satisfie their desires that as the wise Man saith Eccles. 5. 10. He that loveth Silver shall not be satisfied with Silver nor he that loveth Abundance with Increase And that they are so far from satisfying the mind that they distract it and oftentimes fill it with greater uneasiness that they occasion Cares and Fears and Temptations and Sorrows Shew them likewise that these outward and perishing things add nothing of real worth unto them that a Hundred or a Thousand a Year cannot make them one whit either wiser or better that their Estates cannot keep off Sickness or Pain nor sad and sudden Accidents and that they cannot defend them so much as one moment from the approaches of the King of Terrors Shew them what was the Psalmist's Opinion of outward Greatness himself being one of the greatest Men of his time and therefore able to judge o◠the matter Surely says he Psal. 62 9. Men of high degree are a Lye to be laid in the Ballance they are altogether lighter than Vanity Grea◠Me◠are a Lye that is they are not either what their own Vanity would