teaches two sorts of persons first the Foole himselfe not to be wise in his own conceit as Salomon affirms which is certainely a great document to make an unwise man know himselfe Next it teaches the hearers in as much as scorne is one of those punishments which belong to men carnally wise which is oft in Scripture declar'd for when such are punisht the simple are thereby made wise if Salomons rule be true And I would ask to what end Eliah mockt the false Prophets was it to shew his wit or to fulfill his humour doubtlesse we cannot imagine that great servant of God had any other end in all which he there did but to teach and instruct the poore misledde people And we may frequently reade that many of the Martyrs in the midst of their troubles were not sparing to deride and scoffe their superstitious persecutors Now may the confutant advise againe with Sir Francis Bacon whether Eliah and the Maâ—tyrs did well to turne religion into a Comedy or Satir to rip up the wounds of Idolatry and Superstition with a laughing countâ—nance So that for pious gravity his author here is matcht and overmatcht and for wit and morality in one that followes laughing to teach the truth What hinders as some teachers give to Boyes lunkets and knacks that they may learne apace Thus Flâ—ccus in his first Satir and in his tenth Jesting decides great things Stronglier and better oft then earnest can I could urge the same out of Cicero and Seneca but he may content him with this And hence forward if he can learn may know as well what are the bounds and objects of laughter and vehement reproofe as he hath knowne hitherto how to deserve them both But lest some may haply think or thus expostulat with me after all this debatement who made you the busie Almoner to deale about this dole of laughter and reprehension which no man thanks your bounty for To the urbanity of that man I shold answer much after this sort That I friend objecter having read of heathen Philosophers some to have taught that whosoever would but use his eare to listen might heare the voice of his guiding Genius ever before him calling and as it were pointing to that way which is his part to follow others as the Stoicks to account reason which they call the Hegemonicon to be the common Mercury conducting without error those that give themselves obediently to be led accordingly having read this I could not esteeme so poorly of the faith which I professe that God had left nothing to those who had forsaken all other doctrines for his to be an inward witnesse and warrant of what they have to do as that they should need to measure themselves by other mens measures how to give scope or limit to their proper actions for that were to make us the most at a stand the most unceâ—taine and accidentall wanderers in our doings of all religions in the world So that the question ere while mov'd who he is that spends thus the benevolence of laughter and reproofe so liberally upon such men as the Prelats may returne with a more just demand who he is not of place and knowledge never so mean under whose contempt and jerk these men are not deservedly falne neither can religion receive any wound by disgrace thrown upon the Prelats since religion and they surely were never in such amity They rather are the men who have wounded religion and their stripes must heale her I might also tell them what Electra in Sophocles a wise Virgin answer'd her wicked Mother who thought her selfe too violently reprov'd by her the daughter T is you that say it not I you do the deeds And your ungodly deeds finde me the words If therefore the Remonstrant complaine of libels it is because he feels them to be right aim'd For I ask againe as before in the animadversions how long is it since he hath dis-relisht libeâ—s we never heard the least mutter of his voice against them while they flew abroad without controul or check defaming the Scots and Puritans And yet he can remember of none but Lysimachus Nicanor and that he mislikt and censur'd No more but of one can the Remonstrant remember What if I put him in minde of one more What if of one more whereof the Remonstrant in many likelyhoods may be thought the author Did he never see a Pamphlet intitl'd after his own fashion A survey of that foolish seditious scandalous profane libell the Protestation protested The child doth not more expresly refigure the visage of his Father then that book resembles the stile of the Remonstrant in those idioms of speech wherein he seemes most to delight and in the seventeenth Page three lines together taken out of the Remonstrance word for word not as a citation but as an author borrowes from himselfe Who ever it be he may as justly be said to have libell'd as he against whom he writes there ye shall finde another man then here is made shew of there he bites as fast as this whines Vinegar in the inke is there the antidote of Vipers Laughing in a religious controversie is there a thrifty physick to expell his melancholy In the meane time the testimony of Sir Francis Bacon was not misalledg'd complaining that libels on the Bishops part were utter'd openly and if he hop't the Prelats had no intellâ—gence with the libellours he delivers it but as his favourable opinion But had he contradicted himselfe how could I assoil him here more then a little before where I know not how by entangling himselfe he leaves an aspersion upon Iob which by any else I never heard laid to his charge For having affirm'd that there is no greater confusion then the confounding of jest and earnest presently he brings the example of Iob glancing at conceits of mirth when he sate among the people with the gravity of a Iudge upon him If jest and earnest be such a confusion then were the people much wiser then Iob for he smil'd and they believ'd him not To defend Libels which is that whereof I am next accus'd was farre from my purpose I had not so litâ—le share in good name as to give another that advantage against my selfe The summe of what I said was that a more free permission of writing at some times might be profitable in such a question especially wherein the Magistrates are not fully resolv'd and both sides have equall liberty to write as now they have Not as when the Prelats bore sway in whose time the bookes of some men were confuted when they who should have answer'd were in close prison deny'd the use of pen or paper And the Divine right of Episcopacy was then valiantly asserted when he who would have bin respondent must have bethought himselfe withall how he could refute the Clink or the Gate-house If now therefore they be persn'd with bad words who persecuted others with bad deeds it is a way to
small credit for their cause to have found such an assistant as this babler hath devis'd me What other thing in his book there is of dispute or question in answering thereto I doubt not to be justifi'd except there be who will condemne me to have wasted time in throwing downe that which could not keepe it selfe up As for others who notwithstanding what I can allege have yet decreed to mis-interpret the intents of my reply I suppose they would have found as many causes to have misconceav'd the reasons of my silence TO beginne therefore an Apology for those animadversions which I writ against the Remonstrant in defence of Smectymnus since the Preface which was purposely set before them is not thought apologeticall anough it will be best to acquaint ye Readers before other things what the meaning was to write them in that manner which I did For I do not look to be askt wherefore I writ the book it being no difficulty to answer that I did it to those ends which the best men propose to themselves when they write But wherfore in that manner neglecting the maine bulk of all that specious antiquity which might stunne children but not men I chose rather to observe some kinde of military advantages to await him at his forragings at his watrings and when ever he felt himselfe secure to solace his veine in derision of his more serious opponents And here let me have pardon Readers if the remembrance of that which he hath licenc't himselfe to utter contemptuously of those reverend men provoke me to doe that over againe which some expect I should excuse as too freely done since I have two provocations his latest insulting in his short answer and their finall patience I had no fear but that the authors of Smectymnus to all the shew of solidity which the Remonstrant could bring were prepar'd both with skill and purpose to returne a suffizing answer and were able anough to lay the dust and pudder in antiquity which he and his out of stratagem are wont to raise but when I saw his weake arguments headed with sharpe taunts and that his designe was if he could not refute them yet at least with quips and snapping adagies to vapour them out which they bent only upon the businesse were minded to let passe by how much I saw them taking little thought for their own injuries I must confesse I took it as my part the lesse to endure that my respected friends through their own unnecessary patience should thus lye at the mercy of a coy flurting stile to be girded with frumps and curtall gibes by one who makes sentences by the Statute as if all above three inches long were confiscat To me it seem'd an indignity that whom his whole wisdome could not move from their place them his impetuous folly should presume to ride over And if I were more warme then was meet in any passage of that booke which yet I do not yeild I might use therein the patronage of no worse an author then Gregory Nyssen who mentioning his sharpnesse against Eunomius in the defence of his brother Basil holds himselfe irreprovable in that it was not for himselfe but in the cause of his brother and in such cases saith he perhaps it is worthier pardon to be angry then to be cooler And whereas this Confuter taxes the whole discourse of levity I shall shew ye Readers wheresoever it shall be objected in particular that I have answer'd with as little lightnesse as the Remoustrant hath given example I have not beene so light as the palme of a Bishop which is the lightest thing in the world when he brings out his book of Ordination For then contrary to that which is wont in releasing out of prison any one that will pay his fees is layd hands on Another reason it would not be amisse though the Remonstrant were told wherefore he was in that unusuall manner beleaguer'd and this was it to pluck out of the heads of his admirers the conceit that all who are not Prelaticall are grosse-headed thick witted illiterat shallow Can nothing then but Episcopacy teach men to speak good English to pick order a set of words judiciously Must we learne from Canons and quaint Sermonings interlin'd with barbarous Latin to illumin a period to wreath an Enthymema wth maistrous dexterity I rather encline as I have heard it observ'd that a Jesuits Italian when he writes is ever naught though he be borne and bred a Florentine so to thinke that from like causes we may go neere to observe the same in the stile of a Prelat For doubtlesse that indeed according to art is most eloquent which returnes and approaches neerest to nature from whence it came and they expresse nature best who in their lives least wander from her safe leading which may be call'd regenerate reason So that how he should be truly eloquent who is not withall a good man I see not Never the lesse as oft as is to be dealt with men who pride themselves in their supposed art to leave thē unexcusable wherin they will not be better'd there be of those that esteeme Prelaty a figment who yet can pipe if they can dance nor will be unfurnisht to shew that what the Prelats admire and have not others have and admire not The knowledge whereof and not of that only but of what the Scripture teacheth us how we ought to withstand the perverters of the Gospell were those other motives which gave the animadversions no leave to remit a continuall vehemence throughout the book For as in teaching doubtlesse the Spirit of meeknesse is most powerfull so are the meeke only fit persons to be taught as for the proud the obstinate and false Doctors of mens devices be taught they will not but discover'd and laid open they must be For how can they admit of teaching who have the condemnation of God already upon them for refusing divine instruction that is to be fill'd with their own devices as in the Proverbs we may reade therefore we may safely imitate the method that God uses with the froward to be froward and to throw scorne upon the scorner whom if any thing nothing else will heale And if the righteous shall laugh at the destruction of the ungodly they may also laugh at their pertinacious and incurable obstinacy and at the same time be mov'd with detestation of their seducing malice who imploy all their wits to defend a Prelaty usurp◠and to deprave that just government which pride and ambition partly by fine fetches and pretences partly by force hath shoulder'd out of the Church And against such kind of deceavers openly and earnestly to protest lest any one should be inquisitive wherefore this or that man is forwarder then others let him know that this office goes not by age or youth but to whomsoever God shall give apparently the will the Spirit and the utterance Ye have heard the reasons for which I thought not
and ever of a sad gravity that they may win such check sometimes those who be of nature over-confident and jocond others were sent more cheerefull free and still as it were at large in the midst of an untrespassing honesty that they who are so temper'd may have by whom they might be drawne to salvation and they who are too scrupulous and dejected of spirit might be often strengthâ—'d with wise consolations and revivings no man being forc't wholly to dissolve that groundwork of nature which God created in him the sanguine to empty out all his sociable livelinesse the cholerick to expell quite the unsinning predominance of his anger but that each radicall humour and passion wrought upon and corrected as it ought might be made the proper mould and foundation of every mans peculiar guifts and vertues Some also were indu'd with a staid moderation and soundnesse of argument to teach and convince the rationall and sober-minded yet not therefore that to be thought the only expedient course of teaching for in times of opposition when either against new heresies arising or old corruptions to be reform'd this coole unpassionate mildnesse of positive wisdome is not enough to damp and astonish the proud resistance of carnall and false Doctors then that I may have leave to soare a while as the Poets usâ— then Zeale whose substance is ethereal arming in compleat diamond ascends his fiery Chariot drawn with two blazing Meteors figur'd like beasts but of a higher breed then any the Zodiack yeilds resembling two of those four which Ezechiel and S. John saw the one visag'd like a Lion to expresse power high autority and indignation the other of count'nance like a man to cast derision and scorne upon perverse and fraudulent seducers with these the invincible warriour Zeale shaking loosely the slack reins drives over the heads of Scarlet Prelats and such as are insolent to maintaine traditions brusing their stiffe necks under his flaming wheels Thus did the true Prophets of old combat with the false thus Christ himselfe the fountaine of meeknesse found acrimony anough to be still galling and vexing the Prelâ—ticall Pharisees But ye will say these had immediat warrant from God to be thus bitter and I say so much the plainlier is it prov'd that there may be a sanctifi'd bitternesse against the enemies of truth Yet that ye may not think inspiration only the warrant thereof but that it is as any other vertue of morall and generall observation the example of Luther may stand for all whom God made choice of before others to be of highest eminence and power in reforming the Church who not of revelation but of judgement writ so vehemently against the chiefe defenders of old untruths in the Romish Church that his own friends and favourers were many times offended with the fiercenesse of his spirit yet he being cited before Charles the fifth to answer for his books and having divided them into three sorts whereof one was of those which he had sharply written refus'd though upon deliberation giv'n him to retract or unsay any word therein as we may reade in Sleiden Yea he defends his eagernesse as being of an ardent spirit and one who could not write a dull stile and affirm'd hee thought it Gods will to have the inventions of men thus laid open seeing that matters quietly handled were quickly forgot And herewithall how usefull and available God had made this tart rhetorick in the Churches cause he often found by his owne experience For when he betook himselfe to lenity and moderation as they call it he reapt nothing but contempt both from Cajetan and Erasmus from Cocleus from Ecchius and others insomuch that blaming his friends who had so counsel'd him he resolv'd never to runne into the like error if at other times he seeme to excuse his vehemence as more then what was meet I have not examin'd through his works to know how farre he gave way to his owne fervent minde it shall suffice me to looke to mine own And this I shall easily averre though it may seeme a hard saying that the Spirit of God who is purity it selfe when he would reprove any fault severely or but relate things done or said with indignation by others abstains not from some words not civill at other times to be spok'n Omitting that place in Numbers at the killing of Zimri and Cosbi done by Phineas in the heigth of zeal related as the Rabbines expound not without an obscene word we may finde in Deuteronomy and three of the Prophets where God denouncing bitterly the punishments of Idolaters tels them in a terme immodest to be utter'd in coole blood that their wives shall be defil'd openly But these they will say were honest words in that age when they were spok'n Which is more then any Rabbin can prove and certainly had God been so minded he could have pickt such words as should never have come into abuse What will they say to this David going against Nabal in the very same breath when he had but just before nam'd the name of God he vowes not to leave any alive of Nabals house that pisseth against the wall But this was unadvisedly spoke you will answer and set downe to aggravate his infirmity Turne then to the first of Kings where God himselfe uses the phrase I will cut off from Ieroboam him that pisseth against the wall Which had it beene an unseemely speech in the heat of an earnest expression then we must conclude that Ionathan or Onkâ—los the Targumists were of cleaner language then he that made the tongue for they render it as briefly I will cut off all who are at yeares of discretion that is to say so much discretion as to hide nakednesse Whereas God who is the author both of purity and eloquence chose this phrase as fittest in that vehement character wherein he spake Otherwise that plaine word might have easily bin forborne Which the Masâ—reths and Rabbinicall Scholiasts not well attending have often us'd to blurre the margent with Keri instead of Ketiv and gave us this insâ—lâ— rule out of their Talmud That all words which in the Law are writ obâ—cenely must be chang'd to more civill words Fools who would teach men to speak more decently then God thought good to write And thus I take it to be manifest that indignation against men and their actions notoriously bad hath leave and autority oft times to utter such words and phrases as in common talke were not so mannerly to use That ye may know not only as the Historian speaks that all those things for which men plough build or saile obey vertue but that all words and whatsoever may be spoken shall at some time in an unwonted manner wait upon her purposes Now that the confutant may also know as he desires what force of teaching there is sometimes in laughter I shall returne him in short that laughter being one way of answering A Foole according to his folly
my selfe exempted from associating with good men in their labours toward the Churches wellfare to which if any one brought opposition I brought my best resistance If in requitall of this and for that I have not been negligent toward the reputation of my friends I have gain'd a name bestuck or as I may say bedeckt with the reproaches and reviles of this modest Confuter it shall be to me neither strange nor unwelcome as that which could not come in a better time Having render'd an account what induc't me to write those animadversions in that manner as I writ them I come now to see what the confutatioÌ„ hath to say against theÌ„ but so as the confuter shall hear first what I have to say against his confutation And because he pretends to be a great conjector at other men by their writings I will not faile to give ye Readers a present taste of him from his own title hung out like a toling signe-post to call passengers not simply a confutation but a modest confutation with a laudatory of it selfe obtruded in the very first word Whereas a modest title should only informe the buyer what the book containes without furder insinuation this officious epithet so hastily assuming the modesty wch others are to judge of by reading not the author to anticipate to himself by forestalling is a strong presumption that his modesty set there to sale in the frontispice is not much addicted to blush A surer signe of his lost shame he could not have given then seeking thus unseasonably to prepossesse men of his modesty And seeing he hath neither kept his word in the sequel not omitted any kinde of boldnesse in slandering t is manifest his purpose was only to rub the forehead of his title with this word modest that he might not want colour to be the more impudent throughout his whole confutation Next what can equally savour of injustice and plaine arrogance as to prejudice and forecondemne his adversary in the title for slanderous and scurrilous and as the Remonstrants fashion is for frivolous tedious and false not staying till the Reader can hear him prov'd so in the following discourse which is one cause of a suspicion that in setting forth this pamplet the Remonstrant was not unconsulted with thus his first addresse was an humble Remonstrance by a dutifull son of the Church almost as if he had said her white-boy His next was a defence a wonder how it scapt some praising adjunct against the frivolous and false exceptions of Smectymnus sitting in the chaire of his Title page upon his poore cast adversaries both as a Judge and Party and that before the jury of Readers can be impannell'd His last was A short answer to a tedious vindication so little can he suffer a man to measure either with his eye or judgement what is short or what tedious without his preoccupying direction and from hence is begotten this modest confutation against a slanderous and scurrilous libell I conceave Readers much may be guest at the man and his book what depth there is by the framing of his title which being in this Remonstrant so rash and unadvised as ye see I conceit him to be neere a kin to him who set forth a Passion Sermon with a formall Dedicatory in great letters to our Saviour Although I know that all we do ought to begin and end to his praise and glory yet to inscribe him in a void place with flourishes as a man in complement uses to trick up the name of some Esquire Gentleman or Lord Paramont at Common Law to be his book-patron with the appendanâ— form of a ceâ—emonious presentment wil ever appeare among the judicious to be but aâ— an insuls and frigid affectation As no lesse was that before his book against the Brownists to write a Letter to a prosopopoea a certain rhetoriz'd woman whom he calls mother and complains of some that laid whoredome to her charge and certainly had he foldeâ— his Epistle with a superscription to be deliver'd to that female figure by any Post or Carrier who were not a Ubiquitary it had beene a most miraculous greeting We finde the Primitive Doctors as oft as they writ to Churches speaking to them as to a number of faithfull brethren and sons and not to make a cloudy transmigration of sexes in such a familiar way of writing as an Epistle ought to be leaving the track of common adresse to runne up and tread the aire in metaphoricall compellations and many fond utterances better let alone But I step againe to this emblazoner of his Title page whether it be the same man or no I leave it in the midst and here I finde him pronouncing without reprieve those animadversions to be a slanderous and scurrilous libell To which I Readers that they are neither slâ—nderous nor scurrilous will answer in what place of his book he shall be found with reason and not inke only in his mouth Nor can it be a libell more then his owne which is both namelesse and full of slanders and if in this that it freely speaks of things amisse in religion but establisht by act of State I see not how Wickleffe and Luther with all the first Martyrs and reformers could avoid the imputation of libelling I never thought the humane frailty of erring in cases of religion infamy to a State no more then to a Councell it had therefore beene neither civill nor Christianly to derogate the honour of the State for that cause especially when I saw the Parlament it selfe piously and magnanimously bent to supply and reforme the defects and oversights of their forefathers which to the godly and repentant ages of the Jewes were often matter of humble confessing and bewailing not of confident asserting and maintaining Of the State therefore I found good reason to speak all honourable things and to joyne in petition with good men that petition'd but against the Prelats who were the only seducers and mis-leaders of the State to constitute the government of the Church not rightly me thought I had not vehemence anough And thus Readers by the example which hee hath set mee I have given yee two or three notes of him out of his Title page by which his firstlings feare not to guesse boldly at his whole lumpe for that guesse will not faile ye and although I tell him keen truth yet he may beare with me since I am like to chafe him into some good knowledge and others I trust shall not mis-spend their leasure For this my aime is if I am forc't to be unpleasing to him whose fault it is I shall not forget at the same time to be usefull in some thing to the stander by As therefore he began in the Title so in the next leafe he makes it his first businesse to tamper with his Reader by sycophanting and misnaming the worke of his adversary He calls it a mime thrust forth upon the stage to make up the breaches of those
solemne Scenes betweene the Prelats and the Smectymnuans Wherein while he is so overgreedy to fix a name of ill sound upon another note how stupid he is to expose himselfe or his own friends to the same ignominy likening those grave controversies to a piece of Sâ—â—gery or Scene-worke where his owne Remonstrant whether in Buskin or Sock must of all right be counted the chiefe Player be it boasting Thraso or Davus that troubles all things or one who can shift into any shape I meddle not let him explicate who hath resembl'd the whole argument to a Comedy for Tragicall he sayes were too ominous Nor yet doth he tell us what a Mime is whereof we have no pattern from ancient writers except some fragments which containe many acute and wise sentences And this we know in Laertius that the Mimes of Sophron were of such reckning with Plato as to take them nightly to read on and after make them his pillow Scaliger describes a Mime to be a Poem imitating any action to stirre up laughter But this being neither Poem nor yet ridiculous how is it but abusively taxt to be a Mime For if every book which may by chance excite to laugh here and there must be term'd thus then may the Dialogues of Plato who for those his writings hath obtain'd the surname of Divine be esteem'd as they are by that detractor in Athenaeus no better then Mimes Because there is scarce one of them especially wherein some notable Sophister lies sweating and turmoyling under the inevitable and mercilesse dilemma's of Socrates but that hee who reads were it Saturne himselfe would be often rob'd of more then a smile And whereas he tels us that Scurrilous Mime was a personated grim lowring foole his foolish language unwittingly writes foole upon his owne friend for he who was there personated was only the Remonstrant the author is ever distinguisht from the person he introduces But in an ill houre hath his unfortunate rashnesse stumbl'd upon the mention of miming That hee might at length cease which he hath not yet since he stept in to gall and hurt him whom hee would aide Could he not beware could he not be think him was he so uncircumspect as not to foresee that no sooner would that word Mime be set eye on in the paper but it would bring to minde that wretched pilgrimage over Minshews Dictionary call'd Mundus alter idem the idlest and the paltriest Mime that ever mounted upon banke Let him ask the Author of those toothlesse Satyrs who was the maker or rather the anticreator of that uâ—iversall foolery who he was who like that other principle of the Maniches the Arch evill one when he had look't upon all that he had made and mapt out could say no other but contrary to the Divine Mouth that it was all very foolish That grave and noble invention which the greatest and sublimest wits in sundry ages Plato in Critias and our two famous countreymen the one in his Vtopia the other in his new Atlantis chose I may not say as a feild but as a mighty Continent wherein to display the largenesse of their spirits by teaching this our world better and exacter things then were yet known or us'd this petty prevanicator of America the zanie of Columbus for so he must be till his worlds end having rambl'd over the huge topography of his own vain thoughts no marvell if he brought us home nothing but a meer tankard drollery a venereous parjetory for a stewes Certainly he that could indure with a sober pen to sit and devise laws for drunkards to carouse by I doubt me whether the very sobernesse of such a one like an unlicour'd Silenus were not stark drunk Let him go now and brand another man injuriously with the name of Mime being himselfe the loosest and most extravagant Mime that hath been heard of whom no lesse then almost halfe the world could serve for stage roome to play the Mime in And let him advise againe with Sir Francis Bacon whom he cites to confute others what it is to turn the sinnes of Christendome into a mimicall mockery to rip up the saddest vices with a laughing countenance especially where neither reproofe nor better teaching is adjoynd Nor is my meaning Readers to shift off a blame from my selfe by charging the liâ—e upon my accuser but shall only desire that sentence may be respited till I can come to some instance wheâ—eto I may give answer Thus having spent his first onset not in confuting but in a reasonlesse defaming of the book the method of his malice hurries him to attempt the like against the Author not by proofes and testimonies but having no certaine notice of me as he professes furder then what he gathers from the animadversions blunders at me for the rest and flings out stray crimes at a venture which he could never though he be a Serpent suck from any thing that I have written but from his own stuff magazin and hoard of slâ—nderous inventions over and above that which he converted to venome in the drawing To me Readers it happens as a singular contentment and let it be to good men no slight satisfaction that the slâ—nderer here confesses he has no furder notice of mee then his owne conjâ—cture Although it had been honest to have inquir'd before he utter'd such infamous words and I am credibly inform'd he did inquire but finding small comfort from the intelligence which he receav'd whereon to ground the falsâ—ties which he had provided thought it his likeliest course under a pretended ignorance to let drive at randome lest he should lose his odde ends which from some penurious Book of Characters he had been culling out and would faine apply Not caring to burden me with those vices whereof among whom my conversation hath been I have been ever least suspected perhaps not without some suttlety to cast me into envie by bringing on me a necessity to enter into mine own praises In which argument I know every wise man is more unwillingly drawne to speak then the most repining eare can be averse to heare Neverthelesse since I dare not wish to passe this life unpersecuted of slanderous tongues for God hath told us that to be generally prais'd is wofull I shall relye on his promise to free the innocent from causelesse aspersions whereof nothing sooner can assure me then if I shall feele him now assisting me in the just vindication of my selfe which yet I could deferre it being more meet that to those other matters of publick debatement in this book I should give attendance first but that I feare it would but harme the truth for me to reason in her behalfe so long as I should suffer my honest estimation to lye unpurg'd from these insolent suspicions And if I shall be large or unwonted in justifying my selfe to those who know me not for else it would be needlesse let them consider that a short slander will oft times reach
of that vertue which abhorres the society of Bordello's Thus from the Laureat fraternity of Poets riper yeares and the ceaselesse round of study and reading led me to the shady spaces of philosophy but chiefly to the divine volumes of Plato and his equall Xenophon Where if I should tell ye what I learnt of chastity and love I meane that which is truly so whose charming cup is only vertue which she bears in her hand to those who are worthy The rest are cheated with a thick intoxicating potion which a certaine Sorceresse the abuser of loves name carries about and how the first and chiefest office of love begins and ends in the soule producing those happy twins of her divine generation knowledge and vertue with such abstracted sublimities as these it might be worth your listning Readers as I may one day hope to have ye in a still time when there shall be no chiding not in these noises the adversary as ye know barking at the doore or searching for me at the Burdello's where it may be he has lost himselfe and raps up without pitty the sage and rheumatick old Prelatesse with all her young Corinthian Laity to inquire for such a one Last of all not in time but as perfection is last that care was ever had of me with my earliest capacity not to be negligently train'd in the precepts of Christian Religion This that I have hitherto related hath bin to shew that though Christianity had bin but slightly taught me yet a certain reserv'dnesse of naturall disposition and morall discipline learnâ— out of the noblest Philosophy was anough to keep me in disdain of farre lesse incontinences then this of the Burdello But having had the doctrine of holy Scripture unfolding those chaste and high mysteries with timeliest care infus'd that the body is for the Lord and the Lord for the body thus also I argu'd to my selfe that if unchastity in a woman whom Saint Paul termes the glory of man be such a scandall and dishonour then certainly in a man who is both the image and glory of God it must though commonly not so thought be much more deflouring and dishonourable In that he sins both against his owne body which is the perfeter sex and his own glory which is in the woman and that which is worst against the image and glory of God which is in himselfe Nor did I slumber over that place expressing such high rewards of ever accompanying the Lambe with those celestiall songs to others inapprehensible but not to those who were not defil'd with women which doubtlesse meanes fornication For mariage must not be call'd a defilement Thus large I have purposely bin that if I have bin justly taxt with this crime it may come upon me after all this my confession with a tenne-fold shame But if I have hitherto deserv'd no such opprobrious word or suspicion I may hereby ingage my selfe now openly to the faithfull observation of what I have profest I go on to shew you the unbridl'd impudence of this loose rayler who having once begun his race regards not how farre he flyes out beyond all truth shame who from the single notice of the animadversions as he protests will undertake to tell ye the very cloaths I weare though he be much mistaken in my wardrobe And like a son of Belial without the hire of Iâ—sabel charges me of blaspheming God and the King as ordnarily as he imagines me to drink Sack and sweare meerely because this was a shred in his common place-book and seem'd to come off roundly as if he were some Empirick of false accusations to try his poysons upon me whether they would work or no Whom what should I endeavour to refute more whenas that book which is his only testimony returnes the lye upon him not giving him the least hint of the author to be either a swearer or a Sack drinker And for the readers if they can believe me principally for those reasons which I have alleg'd to be of life purpose neither dishonest nor unchaste they will be easily induc't to thinke me sober both of wine and of word but if I have bin already successelesse in perswading them all that I can furder say will be but vaine and it will be better thrift to save two tedious labours mine of excusing and theirs of needlesse hearing Proceeding furder I am met with a whole ging of words and phrases not mine for he hath maim'd them and like a slye depraver mangl'd them in this his wicked Limbo worse then the ghost of Deiphobus appear'd to his friend Aenaeas Here I scarce know them and he that would let him repaire to the place in that booke where I set them For certainly this tormenter of semicolons is as good at dismembring and slitting sentences as his grave Fathers the Prelates have bin at stigmatizing flitting noses By such handy craft as this what might he not traduce Only that odour which being his own must needs offend his sense of smelling since he will needs bestow his foot among us and not allow us to think he weares a Sock I shall endeavour it may be offencelesse to other mens eares The Remonstrant having to do with grave and reverend men his adversaries thought it became him to tell them in scorne that the Bishops foot had beene in their book and confuted it which when I saw him arrogate to have done that with his heeles that surpast the best consideration of his head to spurn a confutation among respected men I question'd not the lawfulnesse of moving his jollity to bethink him what odor a Sock would have in such a painfull businesse And this may have chanc't to touch him more neerly then I was aware for indeed a Bishops foot that hath all his toes maugre the gout and a linnen Sock over it is the aptest embleme of the Prelate himselfe Who being a pluralist may under one Surplice which is also linnen hide foure benefices besides the metropolitan toe and sends a fouler stench to heaven then that which this young queasinesse reches at And this is the immediate reason here why our inrag'd Confuter that he may be as perfet an hypocrite as Caiaphas ere he be a High Priest cries out horrid blasphemy and like a recreant Jew calls for stones I beseech ye friends ere the brick-bats flye resolve me and your selves is it blasphemy or any whit disagreeing from Christian meeknesse when as Christ himselfe speaking of unsavory traditions scruples not to name the Dunghill and the Jakes for me to answer a slovenly wincer of a confutation that if he would needs put his foot to such a sweaty service the odour of his Sock was like to be neither musk nor benjamin Thus did that foolish Monk in a barbarous Declamation accuse Petrarch of blasphemy for dispraising the French wines But this which followes is plaine bedlam stuffe this is the Demoniack legion indeed which the Remonstrant feard had been against him
a most inhumane cruelty they who have put out the peoples eyes reproach them of their blindnesse Just as the Pharisees their true Faâ—hers were wont who could not indure that the people should be thought competent judges of Christs dâ—ctrine although we know they judgâ—d farre better then those great Rabbies Yet this people said they that knowes not the law is accurst We need not the autority of Pliny brought to tell us the people cannot judge of a minister Yet â—haâ— hurts noâ— For as none can judge of a Painter or Stainâ—ry but he who is â—n Artist that is either in the Practick or the Theory which is often separated from the practick and judges learnedly without it so none can judge oâ— a Christian teacher but he who hath either he practâ—ze oâ— the knowledge of Christian religion though not so artâ—â—lâ—y digeâ—eâ— in him And who almost of the meanest Christians hath not heard the Scriptures often read from his childhood besides so many Sermons and Lectures moâ—e in number then any stuâ—ent heard in Philosohy whereby he may easily attaine to know when he is wisely taught and when weakly Whereof three wayes I remember are set downe in Scripture The one is to reade often that best of books written to this purpose that not the wise only but the simple and ignorant may learne by them the other way to know of a minister is by the life he leads whereof the meanest understanding may be appprehensive The last way to judge a right in this point is when he who judges lives a Christian life himselfe Which of these three will the Confuter affirme to exceed the capacity of a plaine artizan And what reason then is theâ—e left wherefore he should be deny'd his voice in the election of his minister as not thought a competent discerner It is but arrogance therefore and the pride of a metaphysicall fume to thinke that the mutinous rabblâ— for so he calls the Christian congregation would be so mistaken in a Clerk of the Vniversity that were to be their minister I doubt me those Clerks that think so are more mistaken in themselves and what with truâ—nting and debaushery what with false grounds and the weaknesse of naturall faculties in many of them it being a maxim in some men to send the simplest of their sonnes thither perhaps there would be found among them as many unsolid and corrupted judgements both in doctriâ—e and life as in any other two Corporations of like bignesse This is undoubted that if any Carpenter Smith or Weaver were such a bungler in his trade as the greater number of them are in their profession he would starve for any custome And should he exerâ—ise his manifacture as little as they do their talents he would forget his art and should he mistake his tools as they do theirs he would marre all the worke he took in hand How few among them that know to write or speak in a puâ—e stile much lesse to distinguish the idea's and various kinds of stile in Latine barbarous and oft not without solecisms declaming in rugged and miscellaneous geare blown together by the foure winds and in their choice preferring the gay rankness of Aâ—uleius Arnâ—bius or any moderne fustianist beâ—ore the native Latinisms of Cicero In the Greek tongue mâ—st of them unletter'd or unenter'd to any sound proficiency in those Attick maisters of morall wisdome and eloquence In the Hebrew text which is so necessary to be understood except it be some few of them their lips are utterly uncircumcis'd No lesse are they out of the way in philosophy pestring their heads with the saplesse dotages of old Paris and Salamanca And that which is the main point in their Sermons affecting the comments and postils of Friers and Jesuits but scorning and slighting the reformed writers In so much that the better sort among them will confesse it a rare matter to heare a true edifying Sermon in either of their great Churches and that such as are most humm'd and applauded there would scarce be suffer'd the second hearing in a grave congregation of pious Christians Is there cause why these men should overween and be so queasie of the rude multitude lest their deepe worth should be undervalu'd for want of fit umpires No my matriculated confutant there will not want in any congregation of this Island that hath not beene altogether famisht or wholly perverted with Prelatish leven there will not want divers plaine and solid men that have learnt by the experience of a good conscience what it is to be well taught who will soone look through and through both the lofty nakednesse of your Latinizing Barbarian and the finicall goosery of your neat Sermon-actor And so I leave you and your fellow starres as you terme them of either horizon meaning I suppose either hemisphere unlesse you will be ridiculous in your astronomy For the rationall horizon in heav'n is but one and the sensible horizons in earth are innumerable so that your allusion was as erroneous as your starres But that you did well to prognosticat them all at lowest in the horizon that is either seeming bigger then they are through the mist and vapour which they raise or else sinking and wasted to the snuffe in their westerne socket Sect. 11. His eleventh Section intends I know not what unlesse to clog us with the residue of his phlegmatick sloth discussing with a heavie pulse the expedience of set formes which no question but to some and for some time may be permitted and perhaps there may be usefully set forth by the Church a common directory of publick prayer especially in the administration of the Sacraments But that it should therefore be inforc't where both minister and people professe to have no need but to be scandaliz'd by it that I hope every sensible Christian will deny And the reasons of such deniall the confuter himselfe as his bounty still is to his adversary will give us out of his affirmation First saith he God in his providence hath chosen sâ—me to teach others and pray for others as ministers and Pastors Whence I gather that however the faculty of others may be yet that thâ—y whom God hath set apart to his ministery are by him endu'd with an ability of prayer because their office is to pray for others And not to be the lip-working deacons of other mens appointed words Nor is it easily credible that he who can preach well should be unable to pray well when as it is indeed the same ability to speak affirmatively or doctrinally and only by changing the mood to speak prayingly In vaine therefore do they pretend to want utterance in prayer who can finde utterance to preach And if prayer be the guift of the Spirit why do they admit those to the Ministery who want a maine guift of their function and prescribe guifted men to use that which is the remedy of another mans want setting them their tasks to read whom the Spirit
AN APOLOGY Against a Pamphlet CALL'D A Modest Confutation of the Animadversions upon the Remonstrant against SMECTYMNUUS LONDON Printed by E. G. for Iohn Rothwell and are to be sold at the signe of the Sunne in Pauls Church-yard 1642. An Apology c. IF Readers to that same great difficulty of well doing what we certainly know were not added in most men as great a carelessenes of knowing what they and others ought to do we had bin long ere this no doubt but all of us much farther on our way to some degree of peace and happinesse in this kingdome But since our sinfull neglect of practâ—sing that which we know to be undoubtedly true and good hath brought forth among us through Gods just anger so great a difficulty now to know that which otherwise might be soone learnt and hath divided us by a controversie of great importance indeed but of no hard solution which is the more our punishment I resolv'd of what small moment soever I might be thought to stand on that side where I saw both the plain autority of Scripture leading and the reason of justice and equity perswading with this opinion which esteemes it more unlike a Christian to be a cold neuter in the cause of the Church then the law of Solon made it punishable after a sedition in the State And because I observe that feare and dull disposition lukewarmenesse sloth are not seldomer wont to cloak themselves under the affected name of moderation then true and lively zeale is customably dispareg'd with the terme of indiscretion bitternesse and choler I could not to my thinking honor a good cause more from the heart then by defending it earnestly as oft as I could judge it to behoove me notwithstanding any false name that could be invented to wrong or undervalue an honest meaning Wherein although I have not doubted to single forth more then once such of them as were thought the chiefe and most nominated opposers on the other side whom no man else undertooke if I have done well either to be confident of the truth whose force is best seene against the ablest resistance or to be jealous and tender of the hurt that might be done among the weaker by the intrapping autority of great names titl'd to false opinions or that it be lawfull to attribute somewhat to guifts of Gods imparting which I boast not but thankfully acknowledge and feare also left at my certaine account they be reckon'd to me many rather then few or if lastly it be but justice not to defraud of due esteeme the wearisome labours and studious watchings wherein I have spent and tir'd out almost a whole youth I shall not distrust to be acquitted of presumption Knowing that if heretofore all ages have receav'd with favour and good acceptance the earliest industry of him that hath beene hopefull it were but hard measure now if the freedome of any timely spirit should be opprest meerely by the big and blunted fame of his elder adversary and that his sufficiency must be now sentenc't not by pondering the reason he shewes but by calculating the yeares he brings However as my purpose is not nor hath beene formerly to looke on my adversary abroad through the deceaving glasse of other mens great opinion of him but at home where I may finde him in the proper light of his owne worth so now against the rancor of an evill tongue from which I never thought so absurdly as that I of all men should be exempt I must be forc't to proceed from the unfained and diligent inquity of mine owne conscience at home for better way I know not Readers to give a more true account of my selfe abroad then this modest Confuter as he calls himselfe hath given of me Albeit that in doing this I shall be sensible of two things which to me will be nothing pleasant the one is that not unlikely I shall be thought too much a party in mine owne cause and therein to see least the other that I shall be put unwillingly to molest the publick view with the vindication of a private name as if it were worth the while that the people should care whether such a one were thus or thus Yet those I intreat who have found the leasure to reade that name however of small repute unworthily defam'd would be so good and so patient as to heare the same person not unneedfully defended I will not deny but that the best apology against false accusers is silence and sufferance and honest deeds set against dishonest words And that I could at this time most easily and securely with the least losse of reputation use no other defence I need not despaire to win beliefe Whether I consider both the foolish contriving and ridiculous aiming of these his slanderous bolts shot so wide of any suspicion to be fastn'd on me that I have oft with inward contentment perceav'd my friends congratulating themselves in my innocence and my enemies asham'd of their partners folly Or whether I look at these present times wherein most men now scarce permitted the liberty to think over their owne concernments have remov'd the seat of their thoughts more outward to the expectation of publick events Or whether the examples of men either noble or religious who have sat downe lately with a meeke silence and sufferance under many libellous endorsements may be a rule to others I might well appease my self to put up any reproaches in such an honourable society of fellow-sufferers using no other defence And were it that slander would be content to make an end where it first fixes and not seek to cast out the like infamy upon each thing that hath but any relation to the person traduc't I should have pleaded against this Confuter by no other advocates then those which I first commended Silence and Sufferance and speaking deeds against faltering words But when I discern'd his intent was not so much to smite at me as through me to render odious the truth which I had written and to staine with ignominy that Evangelick doctrine which opposes the tradition of Prelaty I conceav'd my selfe to be now not as mine own person but as a member incorporate into that truth whereof I was perswaded and whereof I had declar'd openly to be a partaker Whereupon I thought it my duty if not to my selfe yet to the religious cause I had in hand not to leave on my garment the least spot or blemish in good name so long as God should give me to say that which might wipe it off Lest those disgraces which I ought to suffer if it so befall me for my religion through my default religion be made liable to suffer for me And whether it might not something reflect upon those reverent men whose friend I may be thought in writing the Animadversions was not my last care to consider if I should rest under these reproaches having the same common adversary with them it might be counted